


Following Your Scent

by Mylifeismadefromships2002



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-22
Updated: 2019-02-23
Packaged: 2019-07-01 00:12:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 35
Words: 97,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15762621
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mylifeismadefromships2002/pseuds/Mylifeismadefromships2002
Summary: It was a distant memory for him, one that he had almost forgotten until he saw her again after his dream.A medieval Touken Wolf fanfic.





	1. The Exchange Between Kingdoms

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! If you’re wondering why this series is starting from chapter one again, it’s because MY STUPID ASS ACCIDENTALLY DELETED THE ORIGINAL WHEN I WAS AIMING FOR IF IT WERE LIKE THIS. I am so, so sorry for any readers who were attached to this series just as much as I was. Fret not, because I will rewrite this series even if it is my O levels year because I am too damn attached to this.

_“Run, Ken! Keep running, and don’t look back!”_

_”But... Mama, she—“_

_”Don’t worry! We’ll be fine! Just keep running and do not turn back!”_

_..._

_..._

_”Papa, look! It’s a baby wolf!”_

_”It’s injured, isn’t it?”_

_”Papa, we have to treat it! It’s only right!”_

_..._

_I don’t want to leave!_

* * *

His eyes snapped opened as his hands frantically grabbed for the air above him. Upon realising it had been a dream—no, a memory—he sighed and allowed his pale hands to fall back onto his soft mattress.

”My King, are you alright? I heard you mumbling.” His servant and sword, Shuu Tsukiyama called from outside his door.

”I am fine.” He replied, sitting up and trying to control the shakiness of his voice.

A pause. He could feel that Shuu didn’t seem to believe his words.

”Alright.” Came the man’s silky voice. “Please note that breakfast is in half an hour, and there is new paperwork for you to sign.”

Ken Kaneki waited until he heard his servant’s footsteps fade away before exhaling a loud sigh. That was his life as the King. Every single day, it was nothing but more and more paperwork. Even when he was done with one stack, another pile double the original’s height would be thrown onto his desk as if it were some ball for him. He let out a humorless chuckle when he realised he had just insulted himself as a wolf.

Giving another great sigh, he slipped out of his grand bed and drew the curtains in his room, allowing himself a moment to view the kingdom before he sauntered into his bathroom. Inside, he turned the tap above his sink and allowed the cold water to flow into his palms before he splashed it into his face, allowing the cold to destroy any remnants of sleep on his pale face.

Reaching for his towel, he gingerly wiped the water off his face before staring at himself in the mirror before him. 

Even at the young age of twenty one, Ken looked aged. His face—which had been scarred by flames when he was a child—, his paper white hair and heavy bags beneath his eyes made him appear like some old man. He gently touched the pink flesh, most of which were concentrated on the right side of his face. He could still feel the pain of being burnt on that night.

Memories started invading his head. His mother screaming as a pile of burning oak collapsed onto her small frame, his father pleading for him to run and not to look back. Him collapsing in the snow after running for god knows how long in his small wolf body, and  _her._

He couldn’t remember much of the features of the little girl who had brought him home. He remembered staying as a wolf the entire time, playing the part of an injured pup during his stay with the little girl and her family. He remembered the scent of something that smelled like a savoury soup and coffee.

He shook himself, ridding his mind of all thoughts before grabbing the clothes that had been prepared for him and changing into them. A simple white wool tunic, a pair of dark leggings and boots of the same colour had been given to him for the day. A knock on his door alerted him that he had stayed for a little while longer than he would have in the bathroom. He returned to his room, grabbed his mask and hastily put it on before opening the door.

Shuu was standing outside, his eyes staring curiously at his King.

”Are you alright, my King?” He asked for the second time today.

”I am fine.”

* * *

Shuu pushed open the large, dark oak doors before him, allowing the King to enter the dining hall. The chefs had already been gathered into two straight lines before him, bowing as the King strode past them and sat at the far end of the long dining table.

Plates with tarts containing fruit filling were placed before him. Fresh fruit in a bowl came next, followed by two thick slices of bread, and a sunny side up egg. He patiently waited until the Head Chef had placed his goblet on his right and filled it with water before untying the string of the mask near his mouth, picking up his utensils, and eating his food.

He hated mealtimes. He really did.

Back when he was younger, his father sat where he was sitting now, with himself and his mother next to him on either side. Mealtimes were a joy for him when the both of them were still with him. He could remember the happy talks they shared during every meal. Now, there was nobody. Nobody for him to speak to during mealtimes. Nobody there to tell him about their day. Nobody to smile at him and pat him affectionately on his head.

Nobody.

When he had finished his meal, he tied the string back into its knot, picked out an apple from the fruit bowl, and left the dining hall. All without saying a word to the chefs that had bowed their heads again when he left.

He stalked up the grand staircase and turned to the right, feeling his heart sink when his eyes fell upon his office door. He could already see the mountains of paperwork that were awaiting him the moment he opened the oak door. He was right. Three large stacks of papers towering above him were sitting by his desk. He groaned when he realised just how long it would take for him to look through all of them.

 _For the kingdom,_ he told himself,  _for the kingdom._

Using those words as motivation, he sat down on his cushioned chair, grabbed his quill and ink bottle, and began his work.

* * *

She stuffed her belongings into the old suitcase her father had left her. It was made of a type of white wood, and decorated with dark leather. It was one of the things that her parents had left her before their untimely deaths.

A cup bought by her father, a scarf knitted by her mother, the black pearl her brother gave her, the recipe book that her best friend had written out for her. Those were the ones that she packed with great care and placed into her suitcase. Her clothes, a sack of coins, and a bar of soap encased in a smaller wooden box went in next.

Touka Kirishima sighed wearily. Kingdom Anteiku was not a prosperous kingdom. The kingdom itself often had to rely on funding and food donations from other countries to feed its citizens as the soil within the kingdom was infertile and unsuitable for growing crops. Even with the donations the other four kingdoms had generously given, it was still not enough to feed the large population it had.

The king of her kingdom, King Yoshimura, had agreed with the Nameless King from Kingdom Goat to allow a portion its citizens to enter Kingdom Goat. Really, it worked out for both kingdoms. Kingdom Anteiku had too many people, and Kingdom Goat had too little. Kingdom Goat had enough food, but a lack of workers, and Kingdom Anteiku did not have enough food, but too many workers.

Touka had been one of the people that had been selected to live in Kingdom Goat.

She was grateful. It meant that she could find a higher paying job and fill her stomach a little more than usual. But it also meant saying goodbye to the home she grew up in.

”Kingdom Anteiku citizens who are departing to Kingdom Goat, you have ten minutes before you will be entering the carriage!” The man outside her house screamed noisily.

Touka gave her old house one last look. It was a simple wooden cottage filled with only the necessities her then family of four needed; A small kitchen with a stove and tap for hot water and cooking, a large mattress her family would cuddle and sleep on together, and a small little garden she used to play in with her brother.

She smiled at the memory of playing with a wolf pup that had burns on its face. She had fond memories of running through the forests near the kingdom with the pup and her brother, even playing in the snow together when Winter came along. Until the puppy had been taken away by a much larger wolf. She still remembered the tears that clouded her small eyes and flowed down her chubby cheeks as the pup gave her cheek a small lick before leaving with the adult wolf.

She felt her eyes water slightly when she stood at the flimsy door, giving her beloved home one last goodbye before she stepped out of her home.

Touka took a deep breath to calm her fast beating heart. It was the first time she would leave the kingdom, and the last time she would, probably, ever see it again. She stared at the blue sky above her, thankful that she was leaving during Summer and not during Winter, otherwise she would have froze up on the ride there.

”For the kingdom,” She whispered to herself, hoping that her leaving would allow the growing children to have more to eat.

“All citizens leaving for Kingdom Goat, on the carriage now!”

Kingdom Goat and Kingdom Anteiku had carriages awaiting for the citizens. There were six, incredibly large carriages in total, each pulled by around eight horses.

Touka adjusted her maroon coloured dress and straightened her white blouse before hastily stepping into the carriage, immediately wincing when she stepped inside. There was a musty, old scent on the inside of the carriage, almost smelling like rotting wood. And she noted that were weren’t many seats, and that many would have to sit on the floor throughout the entire ride if they weren’t fast enough. She quickly seized a spot on one of the seats and clutched her suitcase to herself when the others started pouring into the carriage.

_For the kingdom._

* * *

Touka didn’t know how long she was in the carriage for. The ride was a bumpy one, enough to make her stomach churn uncomfortably and enough to make others force the ride to stop so they could empty their stomachs onto the grass. Her nose scrunched up when she smelled the unpleasant sourness of bile entering the carriage.

She had fallen asleep sometime on the ride, still clutching her suitcase tightly in case some people decide to try and rob her. Thankfully, nobody had tried anything when she woke up.

”Five minutes to Kingdom Goat!” The man driving the carriage yelled.

Internally, Touka was screaming. Partly because she had to leave her old home, but mostly because she wouldn’t wait to get out of this carriage and stretch her legs. She had been sitting in the same position for god knows how long, and it didn’t help because someone had decided to use her feet as a pillow for some odd reason.

She was practically counting the seconds before the carriage would stop and she would finally be out in the new kingdom. When the carriage stopped and the door opened, she almost let out a cheer of happiness.

She was the first one in, but the last one out of the carriage.

Touka’s head spun slightly when she realised it was sunset. She had left at noon, when the clock struck twelve o’five. If the sun was setting now, it meant she had been on the carriage for six, almost seven, hours!

All the citizens from Kingdom Anteiku were greeted by Kingdom Goat’s King.

She was startled at the King’s appearance. Even though she knew the man had been called the Nameless King and the Faceless King (from almost nobody knowing his name and his actual face respectively), she was still slightly put off by him.

The Nameless King had white hair that glistened like pearls in the fading sunlight, and a piercing gray eye that seemed to glare and shoot at her when she met it. She wondered why he was wearing a mask that obscured more than half of his face, but decided not to ask herself that any further, otherwise her curiousity would get the better of her and she would march up to the King and tear off his mask, and probably get executed on the spot.

Instead of focusing on his face and why he hid it, she chose to examine his mask. It was pure leather, black in colour with a white patch near his mouth which were made to resemble teeth. There was another patch of leather attached to the main part of the mask, which hid his right eye from view.

Any attempts to examine the mask further from where she stood was quickly squashed as the King started to speak.

”Welcome to Kingdom Goat,” He announced after undoing the knot on his mask. “I am sure that all of you know the reason why you are here, so I will not explain any further.”

How could she forget why she had left her home?

”I hope that you will enjoy living in my humble kingdom,” The King went on. “May this exchange be beneficial to both our kingdoms. Starting from today, all of you are Kingdom Goat citizens. Please, enjoy.”

The crowd of people broke out into a short cheer before they started entering the kingdom through its gates. At first, Touka was stunned as a Kingdom Goat looked much more grand as compared to Kingdom Anteiku, but it wore off because she knew that Kingdom Goat was the richest and most developed out of all five kingdoms.

Now, what she was really stunned at was the lack of people in the kingdom. Sure, she knew that Kingdom Goat had a population problem, having less than half the population of Kingdom Anteiku, but she didn’t know it was that much. The streets were practically empty and the available houses were also empty. But that meant she wouldn’t have much trouble finding a place to stay for the night.

Being quick on her feet, Touka wandered around until she found a signboard for an inn. She gingerly presses her hand against the rusty iron handle and pushed the door open. 

The front desk of the inn was illuminated by many different candles that sat in a glass cage, which prevented them from catching onto the wood supports of the inn and causing a fire.

”Welcome,” The man at the desk told her lazily, not even looking up from what he was doing on the desk. “One silver coin per night.”

Touka’s jaw almost dropped at the cost. She had more than enough money to stay at this inn for a year, but one silver coin per night? In Kingdom Anteiku, one night at an inn would be only three copper coins.

 _Maybe that’s where all the money comes from,_ she thought bitterly as she tossed the man a silver coin from her sack and waited for him to hand her the key to her room.

Still not looking up, the man slid the coin across the desk, allowing it to tumble off the table and land with a small  _ching_ , which Touka could only assume that he had dropped it into a pile of coins beneath the desk. Then, the man reached down, then tossed the key to Touka.

”Room 240.” He grunted.

Touka had fired a string of curses towards the man in her head before she stomped up the stairs and searched for her room. When she had found it (at the end of the damn hallway), she unlocked it with her key and stepped inside.

She could see why it costed one silver coin per night.

The room was spacious. A bed at the side of it with a night table that had a candle on top, even a study table and a chair opposite it. When she stepped into the door inside her room, she found a bathroom, something that all Anteiku inns didn’t have in their individual rooms. The bathroom was small, but it still held a sink and a small area with a bucket filled with water for showering.

Touka threw her suitcase onto her bed, opened it, grabbed her soap, and made a wild dash for the bathroom. She desperately needed a shower from staying in that carriage for almost seven hours.

* * *

Ken gripped the edge of his desk, breathing heavily through his mask as he did. He quickly threw the mask off his face before barricading the door with the sofa in his office. No one must see his face.

It couldn’t have been her. It couldn’t have.

And yet, some part of him knew it was her.

He found her. He found the little girl—now a matured woman—that had brought him in when he had escaped the burning castle as a child. It was her who had treated his burns with snow from the outside when he had collapsed. It was her who had fed him the savoury stew through a spoon. It was her who had stolen his heart when he was a child.

It was her.

 

 


	2. Hunting For a Job

Touka woke to the sun’s rays practically blinding her eyes. She had forgotten to shut the blinds last night due to her exhaustion and getting her eyes burnt by the sun was her punishment. Groaning as she sat up in bed, she quickly realised she wasn’t at home, then remembered the reason why she wasn’t at home.

She sighed uncomfortably at the memory of leaving her old home, but she shook it off, as well as any remaining sleep that plagued her eyes.

She walked slowly into the bathroom and splashed her face with some water, just to make sure that no little amount of sleep was left on her face. After drying her face, she stared at her clothes, which were hanging on the study table. She hadn’t worn them for very long yesterday, so she could still wear them today.

Quickly slipping on her clothes and her boots, and grabbing her sack of coins, she walked out of her room, locked it, and headed straight out the front door.

Since her main objective yesterday was to immediately find a place to stay, she didn’t have much time to look around the kingdom. Even if she did, she had collapsed on her bed after her shower out of exhaustion from sitting in the same position for seven hours straight.

It was when her stomach gave a loud growl that Touka realised she hadn’t eaten for more than twelve hours. Now, her main objective was to find food.

Even though she was hungry, Touka couldn’t help but walk slowly. She was completely mesmerised by the kingdom. The houses were all in great condition, the wood that was the buildings’ foundation was new and strong. The stone pathway that she took had no traces of spit or anything disgusting on them.

Her sensitive nose was quickly drawn to the smell of fresh bread coming out from the oven. Kingdom Anteiku had great bread, even from its poor quality ingredients, but the one she smelled now just smelled fresher, and more clean than the one she was used to.

She followed the scent, allowing her nose to lead her wherever the smell came from while her feet tapped against the stone floor.

Her nose had brought her to the kingdom’s heart. When she first entered the seemingly busy shopping district, she realised how quiet it was. Slightly put off by how quiet the large crowd of people were, she tried to see what they were all gawking at once she saw that they were all staring at a certain spot.

The Nameless King himself was in the shopping district, buying bread from the shop owner, who seemed shocked and distracted even when accepting the two copper coins the King had deposited into his hand.

Touka was looking at the King’s visible eye. Her breath hitched when the King’s head tilted upwards, as if sniffing the air, and then turning his head to look towards her.

She didn’t know if the King had recognised her as a former citizen of Kingdom Anteiku or if she had committed something considered taboo in Kingdom Goat, but she was feeling a sense of fear in the pit of her stomach. However, when she looked into his gray eye, her fear quickly changed to curiosity. His eye looked almost like...

Touka mentally slapped herself. Sure, she knew that Kingdom Goat had the largest population of wolf shifters, but what were the chances of the King being the same pup she played with as a child? There could be hundreds of wolves with gray eyes. That would only be right. Besides, even if the wolf pup was the King, he wouldn’t even remember her.

When she focused at his eye again, she was almost taken aback by the soft gaze he was looking at her with. It was nothing like the gaze she had heard stories about; the one that would sent even the toughest men on their knees and begging for forgiveness even if they had done nothing.

Her frantic mind acted fast, and she tore herself away from the King’s gaze, pretending to have been in awe of his presence before she had turned to a stall selling fresh fruit. She was almost disturbed at just how many people were staring at the King. The shopkeepers were so distracted that anyone could have taken an apple and ran for it without anyone ever noticing.

Touka eyed the red fruit in her hand. The apple was a beautiful red colour. She quickly turned to the other fruits, and stared at the different colours. There were bananas, green apples, grapes and more. But she settled for the apple she held in her hand.

”How much for this?” She asked the shopkeeper.

”Uh...” The shopkeeper murmured, his eyes falling to a space that was uncomfortably close the Touka’s side. “One copper coin...”

Touka opened her sack and reached for the smallest coins, then dropped a single coin into the palm of the shopkeeper, who was still gawking at the spot next to her. She didn’t have the heart to turn to her right. She already knew the King was standing there, probably watching her.

What had she done? She had only stayed at an inn and was purchasing food now. What had she done to let the King stare at her like that? She was only a stranger to him, it wouldn’t make sense for him to be looking at her like that.

She managed to turn her body to her left as walk away. When she was certain she was far enough, she turned back. Her confusion and panic rose further when she saw that the King was indeed standing next to her when she was purchasing the apple.

* * *

Now, Ken was certain it was her. She still carried the same scent as she did when she was a child. It was faint, but he could still remember it like the back of his hand. Or paw.

He wanted to speak to her. Wanted to see if she remembered him if he showed her his wolf form. He wanted to be with her again.

But how?

He flipped through his mind, going through all the possibilities that he could use to meet with her again. He couldn’t go in a disguise, because his facial scars would just give away his identity that he would try to hide. He could offer her a job position at the castle to try and get close to her, but the King himself offering a job position seemed too out of place and strange.

He almost crumpled a sheet of paper in frustration. This was the best he could do? He was considered the genius of the kingdom by his subjects and servants, and he couldn’t come up with a better way to hire a woman into the castle.

He was so absorbed in thinking how he would invite the woman to work in the castle that he didn’t notice one of his maids had entered the room with a cup of tea.

”Tea, my King?” Hinami said softly as she set the tea cup down on the mahogany wood desk.

When he didn’t give a response, Hinami frowned. He would always give a small ‘thank you’ even if he was frantically flipping through the papers like a mad man.

”My King?” She called worriedly.

The Nameless King was still staring at a document with one of his hands fisted in his hair so tightly that it looked as if he was about to tear out a chunk of his hair.

Hesitantly, she placed her hand on the King’s shoulder. He instantly snapped up, his eyes blinking rapidly as he did so. “Yes?”

”Your tea?”

Ken stared at the steaming cup of tea that was just placed on his desk and nodded towards it. “Thank you.”

Hinami clasped her small hands together. “My King, you seem troubled. If I may ask, what is troubling you?”

Ken instantly came up with an excuse. “I don’t think we have enough servants in the castle. I recently found a large pile of dust hanging from my bedsheets.”

The young woman frowned. “Would you like for me to request Sir Shuu to open the castle for new recruits to work in the castle? The ones currently are old, from the time your parents first hired them, I believe that they must have forgotten some spots.”

Why the hell had he not thought about that?

”Yes, please.”

He prayed that the woman would be one of the people applying. If she wasn’t, he was already out of options.

* * *

Touka sighed unhappily. Her day of looking for a job had been unfruitful. While Kingdom Goat had many jobs with high payments to offer, they either paid too little, had too many men that made her uncomfortable, or was a job that she didn’t want to do.

She had almost applied for a position of a maid at some aristocrat’s mansion, but one look at the man of the house’s eyes and she already knew that he was nothing but a sadistic pervert.

Trudging in her steps, she made it to the kingdom’s shopping district for the second time today. The crowd were bristling and chatty, a sure sign that the King was nowhere nearby. She almost sighed in relief, but stopped before she could. Why would she be worried if the King was here? Sure, his presence unnerved her and gave her the feeling like she had done something wrong, but she was certain that she hadn’t committed any form of crime.

Touka paid for a small loaf of bread and placed it gently into a basket she had purchased from another shop. She had to find a shop that sold cutlery and knives so that she could utilise them in the inn’s kitchen to prepare her meals. Since she wasn’t very hungry tonight, she decided to purchase a small jar of black currant jam to go with the bread she had bought.

As she made her way back to the inn, she overheard conversations from other people around her, causing her to stop and listen closely.

”A close friend of mine works in the castle as a chef,” A man had spoke to his wife. “Says the King will be opening up the castle for people to enter and work there. Apparently, the servants that are in the castle now are rather old.”

”I imagine so,” The woman replied. “I’m fairly certain that they have been here since the previous King reigned.”

”How old is our King now?”

”I believe he is twenty one. I can still remember the previous King and Queen proudly showing him off when he was just a newborn, and I was a young lass. Did your friend say anything about the pay there?”

”Why do you ask?” The man quipped in a suspicious manner.

His wife snorted. “Do you think my pay and yours is enough to feed our family? With yours only, we would starve. With mine included, we can only just scrape by. If my pay was higher, I’m certain that we could give our children and ourselves a better life.”

Touka observed as the man thought about his wife’s decision before answering.

”My buddy told me the lowest maids can earn ten silver coins per week. I hear the King’s personal servants can earn up to five gold coins per month!”

That was enough for Touka to consider a position in the castle. She would be paid much more than the regular jobs in the kingdom would offer her. Ten silver coins a week! Even the aristocrat had only offered her three silver coins a month. It just goes to show how wealthy a man the King was.

As she munched on her jam covered bread, she made the decision to head to the castle first thing tomorrow to apply for a job.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I was writing this chapter, I came to realise that the new details I included in the first chapter would have an impact in later chapters. I don’t know how big of an impact it would be, but it could cause me to deviate from the original plot and give this fanfic a whole new plot. Would you guys be fine if I end up deviating from the original plot?


	3. Job Application

Touka made her way towards the castle in the best clothes she had. She hardly took sight of all the other people that were swarming into the castle with the same intentions she had.

Amazingly, the castle itself was surrounded by a moat. On the inside, the castle was protected with tall stone walls that stretched to every corner of the castle and beyond. There were archery towers on each corner, each decorated with a pointed tip made of hardened bricks, which donned Kingdom Goat’s flag on its tip; a white flag with the silhouette of a goat.

She entered through the front gate, which was a massive oak drawbridge that was held together by two strong chains dangling from either side of the large plank of wood. She grimaced at the algae sticking on the drawbridge. It was obvious that the servants had grown too old to clean up the green mess hanging on the bridge.

Touka lowered her head slightly as she hurried past the guards that were standing guard at the entrance of the castle. She could feel their eyes beneath their helmets staring at her and following her as she passed by.

The castle was much more grand than she had expected. 

Surrounding the castle and being surrounded by the walls was a field of green grass that had flowers growing in various patches. To the actual entrance of the castle was a cobblestone path leading straight to the main entrance. Touka had restrained all desire to shift into a bunny and frolick around the fields like she used to do as a child, instead focusing on why she decided to come here in the first place.

She took a deep breath before entering through the massive dark wood doors.

If she thought the exterior looked grand, what was a word she could use to describe the interior?

The interior had marble tiles as it’s flooring. Beautiful paintings were aligned carefully on the walls, each showing portraits of the previous King, Queen, and the current King as a child. A set of double staircases were on either side of the main room, each holding vases filled with the flowers from the garden outside the castle. Six large stone pillars with intricate designs on them prevented the second flooring from collapsing. To her left was the doorway to a room of book, and to her right, a door to somewhere else.

When she looked straight, she was greeted with a long hall. Doors were on either side of the hall, which Touka assumed was where the servants slept. 

She so wanted to keep exploring the grand castle, but she was halted by a smooth voice.

”Beautiful, isn’t it?”

Her body froze. She easily recognised the voice being the King’s.

She slowly turned around, watching as the King slipped into her view. No one else seemed to notice him, they were all too mesmerised by the castle.

His visible gray eye still brought back memories for her. Even though she was fairly certain that they were not the same person, she couldn’t overlook the fact that her childhood wolf friend had the same eyes as the King.

”Yes...” Touka replied cautiously. “The castle is beautiful.”

There it was again. The soft look in his eye.

”It looks rather new,” She went on. “I believe this castle is supposed to be rather old?”

The King nodded his head. “Indeed, it is supposed to be rather old. However, fifteen years ago, some bandits had wreaked havoc on the castle and caused it to burn down. The castle you see now has been repaired to resemble its former glory as much as possible.”

Her mind was fixated on the fact that the castle had burnt down. When she first found the little wolf, it had burn marks on the right side of its face. The very same side that the King was concealing with his mask. Touka attempted to shake off the mere coincidence, but it was of little use.

”I assume you are here to apply for a job?” The King asked in a deep voice. 

Touka nodded. “Yes.”

The masked man reached into his pocket and pulled out a pocket watch. “Mm... Head to the room on the right the furthest away from the hall. We will be selecting the applicants in that room.”

The young woman nodded her head and started following the crowd of people, who had apparently been told to enter the room she would be entering by a man wearing glasses.

When she stepped into the room, she wasn’t surprised at the fact that it was also grand. Though there weren’t any valuables inside, there were lavish pieces of furniture. The round tables had been polished to the point Touka could see her own reflection within them.

”Good morning to all of you,” A man with violet hair said in a loud yet polite tone. “I understand that all of you have visited the castle today for the sole purpose of applying for a position within the castle. If you had other intentions besides doing so, please escort yourself out of the castle before the guards do.”

Touka raised her eyebrows at the number of people who had bowed their heads and left the room quietly, their eyes wide with something that resembled fear. Altogether, the total number of people that had left the room had amounted to about a quarter of the crowd.

The man nodded his head, his eyebrows raising in disapproval before he muttered something about sightseers taking chances.

”Alright,” He continued, putting on a cheerful smile. “Please know that not all of you will be chosen as we have limited vacant spots for you. We will only be selecting people at random. Please do not feel as if you are not suitable for the position.”

The man cleared his throat. “My King will be selecting who will be joining the castle.”

The King appeared next to the man, once again seemingly appearing out of nowhere.

His piercing silver eyes scanned through the crowd of fidgeting people over and over again, soft murmurs came from his mouth that no one but the violet haired man could hear. Touka assumed that he was pointing out the ones that he would take into the castle.

The sound of footsteps behind her caused her to turn her attention towards her back.

A small group of people wearing aristocratic clothing were standing behind her. Touka naturally assumed that the people were the ones that had the positions closest to the King himself. She was willing to bet three silver coins that they would be the one leading the ones that were not selected for the jobs out of the castle, dragging if the person refused to comply.

”You,” The man pointed to a woman standing not to far away from Touka. “You are accepted. Please sit down so that we know you have been selected.”

One by one, people started sitting down. It was down to about twenty people when Touka started losing hope that she would get a position in the castle. She started to feel slightly upset before she was pointed at to sit down. And so she did, with an elated heart.

”You, and you.” The man said, pointing to the final two people. “Everyone else who is still standing, you may leave.”

Touka could see the reluctance in the people’s eyes as they left. One of them had to be dragged away after he demanded a position in the castle. 

“The older generation of servants will be taking any one of you,” The King said to them. “They will be mentoring you for five days to teach you what they know of the castle and what to do when something needs to be done. In those five days, you still have to go back home. After those five days, you are welcome to either live within the castle in the servants’ quarters, or go home once your shift ends for the day.”

”If you choose to live within the castle, you are more than welcome to explore the castle grounds. Acknowledge that you are all not allowed into the Higher Ups’ quarters unless you are there to tidy up the rooms or have been specially brought for a... very specific reason.”

Touka didn’t want to venture into what his words could mean. She was just happy that she managed to land a job in the castle.

* * *

The role she had been assigned to was tea serving role. It was simple enough; she just had to brew the tea and serve it to the higher ups at specific points of the day until four in the afternoon, after which another servant would take her place until the next day.

Touka felt lucky. She was doing such an easy job and earning eight silver coins per week. She felt lucky until she was told that every single higher up had a different preference of how strong they would like their tea.

Her predecessor gave her a run down; Sir Hideyoshi, Sir Nishiki and Sir Shuu enjoyed their tea normally, which was two tea leaves each two pints of hot water. Sir Kazuichi and Madam Kaya preferred their teas weaker in flavour, that was two tea leaves in three pints of water. The King enjoyed strong tea, which was two tea leaves in a single pint of water. Apparently, Sir Koma hated tea.

The old woman who was her predecessor provided her with a cheats list, then told her to keep it for the next generation once she was able to memorise the list.

Brewing tea was simple enough, but brewing three different pots of water of varying sizes and varying amounts of water made it challenging. She was told to prepare the King’s tea first, as he would drink it the moment he received his tea while the others would wait for a while before drinking, which allowed the tea leaves to better infuse with the water. The King’s tea had to be made first so it had time to infuse into the water before being served.

Touka had worked with coffee before, so she had an easier time with the pots than she thought she would.

”Good,” The old woman said in a kind voice. “Put them all on a tray and deliver them to their respective drinkers.”

That was easy, because all the higher ups had different tea cups they used. The patterns and colours on each individual cup was different enough so she could memorise them easily.

Black flowers belonged to the King, the orange cup belonged to Sir Hideyoshi, the blood red flowers to Madam Kaya, the snake patterns to Sir Nishiki, the one with cross patterns belonged to Sir Kazuichi, and the white rose belonged to Sir Shuu.

Easy.

She began her way up to the Higher Ups’ quarters. Their doors had their names inscripted, so Touka had no problems in identifying the rooms.

“Yes!” Sir Hideyoshi had cheered loudly when Touka had knocked and entered his room before settling his cup of tea on his desk, which had a large stack of papers on it. She was startled by his cheerful behaviour, but she bowed respectfully before leaving to serve the next cup.

The King’s cup of tea was the last cup of tea she delivered. She knocked on the door gently, her left arm started to hurt from the amount of time she had to hold the tray for while trying to not spill the tea.

”Come in.” Came the King’s voice, muffled from the mask he was wearing.

Touka let herself in and immediately gawked at the stacks of papers on and beside the King’s desk. There was so much more than all the other higher ups’ work combined.

She heard the King sigh wearily. “Just leave it.” He mumbled without even looking up as he wrote on the paper with his feather quill.

Touka didn’t know where the others would have placed the tea, so she placed it on the top right of the desk.

Apparently, that was not the place that the servants would place the tea on, as the King snapped his head up to see who had placed the tea down. His single eye widened as he realised that she had been assigned to be the new tea server.

The King blinked slightly. “Sorry. I thought you were Hinami.”

”It is alright, my King.” Touka replied politely.

He cleared his throat. “May I ask for your name? It will make it easier for me to address you.”

”My name is Touka.” She said quietly, bowing her head down. The atmosphere was tense, an obvious sign that the King was frustrated.

”Touka,” He murmured, letting the name roll off his tongue. “I’ll remember that.”

Touka nodded, bowed again, then left the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Though I’m trying to update daily, it’s a little difficult since my school days end at almost 6 in the evening now, and I still have to study and rest at home. Please don’t be upset if I do not update.


	4. Stress

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok. What in fucks name am I doing updating a chapter today? MY DNT O LEVEL DEADLINE IS TOMORROW AND HERE I AM TYPING LIKE THERES NOT DAMN TOMORROW. Enjoy the chapter though! There should fluff in the next few chapters.

Ken stared at the official document in his hands. His forehead was dripping with sweat and his hands were moist with perspiration.

_To the Nameless King,_

_I, King Yamori of Kingdom Aogiri, would like to travel to Kingdom Goat to discuss various problems that, if solved, can be beneficial to the both of our kingdoms and allow the both of us to prosper well into the future._

_Please give your response in the same envelope that I have used to send this to you._

_-King Yamori_

He already knew what would happen. By law of the five kingdoms (for whatever strange reason), if the king of a kingdom were to be assassinated by someone from a separate kingdom—with the king of the respective kingdom having full knowledge of it—the kingdom would be ruled over by the other king. Kingdom Aogiri was the least prosperous of all the kingdoms, and King Yamori would attempt to assassinate him in order to rule over Kingdom Goat and its riches.

Ken let out an audible gulp. Shuu was out of the kingdom after being sent on a vacation that Ken had basically forced him to accept. He was really starting to regret his decision now.

Though his other higher ups were capable of protecting him, he knew that their busy schedules and inferiority combats skills compared to Shuu’s would render them unable to protect him well.

He would have to rely on himself.

Ken ran his hand roughly across his hair, then slapped his palm against his face. His combat skills were rusty. He had learnt close combat from Shuu at a young age, but he hadn’t had much opportunities to put those skills to use, and so hardly ever used them. Again, he was starting to regret his decision.

He stared at his hands, willing his massive paws to take over his hands. His claws were still sharp, and he could certainly slice through anybody with them. But would he be able to? He had never killed anybody in his life before.

Understanding that rejecting King Yamori’s offer would enrage him and likely cause some unexplained deaths to occur in Kingdom Goat, Ken reluctantly picked up his quill pen and starting writing the return letter, which was accepting the offer.

Each stroke he made with the ink dotted quill made his stomach churn uncomfortably, like it was trying to let him know that whatever he was going to do was a huge mistake. Like he didn’t know already. 

The scratching sound the quill made as it was dragged across the paper made Ken ultimately decide that he was sealing his fate into some demon’s hands as he signed his name on the sheet of paper.

Then, the realisation that he would have to send another one of his higher ups to send the sealed document dawned on him. Sending a document to another king by delivering it to them with a mere guard was considered extremely rude and distrusting of the other king, which could lead to conflicts between the kingdoms.

He would have to send someone with little combat experience to ensure he wouldn’t be lacking any more protection than he already had.

It would have to be Hideyoshi. He hardly trained at all and prefers spending his time doing his work or reading books, which led to his superior intelligence that rivaled Ken’s.

He gently folded the thin sheet of paper that was basically his death certificate and slotted it back into the envelope it came in. He then opened a small box and drew out a small container filled with a red gloopy liquid, which he plopped gently onto the envelope’s opening until it formed a small circle, then stamped it with his own official stamp.

He mentally applauded himself. He was accepting an assassination.

Turning to his left, he stared at the six ropes dangling from the wall. Each rope was attached to a bell in a higher ups’ room and when he pulled it, it would alert them that he requested their presence in his office.

He pulled the rope leading to Hideyoshi’s room, and within seconds, the blonde haired man entered his office.

”You called?” He asked in a cheerful voice. Hideyoshi had been with Ken for many, many years. He, along with Shuu, was the only one who knew his actual name and true face beneath his mask. They had been best friends since they were young, and it stayed that way even when Ken was assigned as King.

”Hide,” Ken said in a grave, serious tone, instantly alerting the other man to the severity of the situation. “King Yamori of Kingdom Aogiri has requested a meeting with me to... discuss ‘matters’. You already understand his true intentions and you are to deliver my acceptance letter to him.”

Hide seemed bewildered as to why Ken would accept such a request, knowing full well it would be an assassination attempt. He opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by the King.

”Would you rather have the death of one man, or the death of too many innocent subjects?”

”Ken,” Hide said. He only said his true name when he was extremely serious. “You are dooming the subjects if you die. King Yamori does not care for his own subjects, what makes you think he would care for the ones here after you die? They will starve and die.”

Ken glared at him through his visible eye. “And you think I do not know that?” He snapped. “I am planning everything I can to ensure that I survive and can continue to rule over Kingdom Goat. I will not die and leave all of you to King Yamori.”

Both men glared at each other, unwilling to back down.

Hide was the first to lower his head as he gingerly took the envelope from the desk.

”I will return in four days.” He murmured quietly before slipping out of the room.

Ken didn’t even have the time to thank Hide.

* * *

Ken left his office. He felt like if he stayed there for a moment longer he would begin to suffocate.

He needed time to himself. Away from his work, and away from other people.

After making sure that no one was near where he was, he quickly left the castle through it’s back door and sauntered into the gardens.

Usually, he would head into the forests that were just across the castle’s borders and beyond the moat. But he didn’t feel like it.

Instead, he opted to just flop his entire body onto the grass and lay there in wolf form. It had been a while since he felt the cooling grass against his skin.

He took a deep inhale, allowing the grassy scent to fill his nostrils and calm him down slightly. Turning over his shoulder, his stomach did a flip when he saw Touka cautiously approaching him, afraid of the giant wolf that towered over her entire body.

His mind was suddenly torn into two sides. One side screaming at him to cover his facial scars so he wouldn’t reveal who he was to her. The other was fighting and yelling at him to let her know who he was to her.

Thinking of which option he should choose made him forget he was a wolf, and that he couldn’t very well cover his scars with a paw. 

Well, he did the best he could. He frantically brought his right paw up to cover his face slightly.

Touka noted this. He could practically see her curiousity overriding her fear of a giant wolf as she wandered over to his right.

 _To hell with it,_ he thought as he lowered his paw, letting Touka get a full view of his scarred face.

In an instant, shock took over her curiousity and was even spreading across her face. She covered her mouth with her hands, in a failed attempt to suppress her gasp.

She recognised him.

Touka recognised the burn marks. They were in the exact position she remembered them to be. Every detail, shape and size were exactly the same. The large patch that covered the right side of his face was exactly the same as all those years ago.

Ken’s heartbeat seemed to raise slightly as she attempted to reach out to touch him. How long had it been since she last caressed his face? He was patiently awaiting the touch of her smooth hand on his face before she jerked her hand back in surprise.

He tilted his head to one side, confused as to why she suddenly deprived him of the opportunity to feel her again.

She took a step back, her hands once again flying to her mouth to suppress a gasp. She seemed terrified of him all of a sudden, and he didn’t know what he had done wrong to make her feel scared of him.

In an attempt to bring her back, he extended a paw, letting it curl behind her as he gently nudged her towards him. Was she scared that he would hurt her? He never did when he was a pup in front of her, so why would he do that now?

He lowered his head, like he did all the time when they were younger. He would always lower his head in front of her, and she would eagerly and happily pat and rub him on the head and ears until he fell asleep comfortably in her arms.

Then, what was the problem now? She obviously knew he was the same pup she had taken care of so many years ago, the only thing that had changed was his size and fur colour.

His fur colour.

Who else in the castle had hair (or fur) as white as the King’s? He had to mentally slap himself for not noticing earlier.

”You...” She breathed. “You’re the King, aren’t you...?”

There was no point in hiding it anymore.

Sighing softly through his nose, he nodded.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Boom. Cliffhanger.


	5. Mistake

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The new plot may be taking a much darker path than the original did. I will still be including fluff, but the storyline itself will definitely be much more serious in tone than the original.

“Wha—How...?” She sputtered.

A part of him regretted telling her. But if he didn’t, she would still be treating him like a stranger, something he didn’t want.

“Touka,” He began. “I am... sorry that I didn’t let you know who I was sooner. I really am.” 

He nudged her closer to himself.

”Please,” He mumbled. “Do not let my position as King let you treat me any different than how you used to.”

Touka’s eyes were as wide as saucers. Her childhood wolf friend being the King himself was an earth shaking discovery to her.

”Talk to me,” He pleaded. “Please. Don’t let this change how you used to look at me in the past.”

He sounded so desperate, as if her deciding to treat him differently due to knowing his true identity would seriously harm him.

By the time Touka had regained some portion of her mind, Ken had already pulled her close enough that her face was right in front of him and pressed up against his large face. She drew a shaky breath. It wasn’t how she thought she would reunite with the little pup like how she imagined it for years as a child.

”I...” She whispered, shaking her head slightly. “I don’t know what to say... It—It’s a lot for me to take in...”

”You can take your time,” He said softly. “You can take however long you need to accept the fact.”

”No,” She breathed. “It isn’t that I don’t accept the fact. It’s just... overwhelming. It isn’t every day that you find out your closest friend growing up is someone of royalty.”

She felt slightly wary of the way he was staring at her. He almost looked like he was expecting her to accept him immediately, even though she knew he wouldn’t do something like that.

Though she was overwhelmed with shock, she found comfort when she accidentally placed her hand onto his fur when she attempted to rub at her neck, something she usually did when she felt uncomfortable in a situation. His soft fur reminded her of the times when she would happily play with him until they fell asleep from exhaustion. It brought back memories of them playing together with her brother and tumbling around in the snow, after which she had to dust the snow off of him.

When she looked at the King again, he was staring at her hand with an eager look in his eyes. Hesitantly, she stroked the soft fur beneath her hands again, watching curiously as he closed his eyes and sighed in contentment. Though her hand was much smaller on him now, he still felt the same level of comfort and happiness as he did all those years ago.

His happiness only grew when she began petting the space between his eyes. It was most relaxing if she petted him there, and he would fall asleep quickly if done for a period of time.

For Touka, she felt a wave of nostalgia hit her. He was so much larger now, but he was the same little pup she took care of many years ago. She smiled, finally relaxing enough to sit down next to him.

* * *

”Where is the King?” Kazuichi asked. “I haven’t seen him since this afternoon.”

It was almost seven in the evening. The King was last seen at around four, and he wasn’t in any of the locations that one would usually be found in.

”I have no idea,” Koma said, not looking up from his papers. “I have not seen him since this afternoon. Why are you looking for him?”

Kazuichi frowned. “I am to inform him that another letter from Kingdom Aogiri has arrived, even though Sir Hideyoshi has not returned to the castle yet.”

This made Koma look up in confusion. “King Yamori doesn’t send letters unless he is asking for something from the other Kings. I know that he has already asked something from our King from Sir Hideyoshi, so what could he want now?”

The bearded man shook his head, not knowing the answer.

”You should ask Kaya,” Koma suggested to him. “Usually, she is the one who keeps track of where the King is.”

Kazuichi shuddered. Kaya was usually a kind and polite woman, but if frustrated enough by her work, she was capable of hurling her table across the room with enough force to shatter it. He knew this, because he had been there when Koma had made the horrible mistake of ‘accidentally’ spilling Kaya’s cup of tea when she was in a rather bad mood.

”D-Do you think she would be fine with me entering her office? I don’t want to be in the middle of her wrath.” He said with an audible swallow.

Koma waved his hand dismissively as he directed his attention towards his papers again. “Do not worry. You’re the second last person she would want to direct her rage at. She says you’re too innocent and nice to be enraged at.”

This calmed him down slightly, but not much.

Not wanting to disturb Koma any further and wanting to get this done and over with as soon as possible, Kazuichi steeled himself as he knocked on the white wood door that was Kaya’s office.

”Come in.” Came her calm and composed voice. This unnerved him, as he knew that the calmer she sounded the more frustrated she was.

It was now or never.

”Lady Kaya,” He said in a quiet, timid voice.

She looked up at him, her dead looking eyes suddenly lighting up slightly when she saw that it was Kazuichi that had entered. “Can I help you, Sir Kazuichi?”

Kazuichi nodded his head, forcing himself to form a small smile. By now it was more than obvious that she wouldn’t hurt him, but he couldn’t help but feel like he would be soiling his trousers soon.

”I just wanted to ask if you had seen the King.”

Kaya frowned, then her eyes started drifting to her right as she tilted her chin upwards in deep thought until she finally gave her answer. “I believe I last saw him in the gardens. I think he was trying to relax from the heavy workload he had for so long.”

Her words made Kazuichi state at his shoes. Their King had so much work on himself and they could do nothing to help. Even if they could, he would insist that he could handle his workload and refuse their help.

He knew all the things the King had to work with. All the paperwork that citizens had submitted that were filled with complains had to be thought about before solving the issues. The many letters to the other kingdoms to increase the trust between their kingdom and the others by offering help. Working out the calculations needed to pay the higher ups and the loans for the civilians. On top of that, being the most influential and highest position in the kingdom made him the prime subject for an assassination.

It was all too much for a single man to handle.

With those thoughts haunting his mind, he made his way to the castle’s garden, instantly recognising the enormous wolf lying on the grass.

Seeing the King’s animal form was incredibly rare. So rare that Kazuichi had only seen it less than five times in his entire servitude to the King. He could only remember the King’s back. He only caught a glimpse of the wolf’s face in those few times. He remembered the pink flesh that stuck out on his face for just a brief moment before the King had detected his presence and literally pleaded for him to leave the surroundings until he was finished with something. 

He never thought to question it. But each time he thought about it, he had a sickening feeling in his stomach. What would the King be doing for him to need to be in his animal form? He could be maiming an animal for all he knew.

But now, just seeing the large wolf curled up into a ball and seemingly sleeping peacefully, he didn’t think it was possible for him to be maiming an animal at that time.

Kazuichi made sure that no one else was nearby to see the King’s face before approaching him to wake him up.

Shockingly, he found one of the servants nestled between the wolf’s face and paw, her hand resting on the King’s snout as she slept quietly.

He was instantly on the offensive. He didn’t know who the girl was, but he knew for a fact that the King never let anybody this close to him. Possible wild scenarios raced through his head, ranging from the girl drugging the King to her playing dead. In his protective mindset, he hadn’t stopped to see that the King was snuggling up to the young girl.

Though he was not trained well in combat, he reached for the her throat and gripped it tightly, his brute strength alone was enough to effortlessly lift her off from the King.

The girl was awake in an instant, her dark eyes were wide with shock and terror as she gripped onto his hand and futilely attempted to pry his hand away from her neck.

The grip on her neck prevented her from screaming. Even coughing was near impossible for her now as he tightened his hold on her neck, forcing liquid from her mouth to start to leak and trail down her cheeks. Her eyes were tearing up from the amount of effort she used to continue breathing. 

Kazuichi watched as her kicking legs started to move at a slower rate and the grip on his hand lessen in pressure. Soon, there was almost no movement in her body as she desperately tried to speak.

”... K... Ki...”

It was at this moment the King stirred. He first stared at the spot the girl had been lying on, his head tilting in confusion as he seemingly wondered where she had gone. Then, he was aware of another presence. He turned, almost letting out a scream as he saw the sight before him.

”My King,” Kazuichi attempted to greet. “This girl was—“

He could say no more as he was suddenly swatted aside by a paw, his grip on the girl’s neck being released as he was forcefully tumbling away.

When he had shaken off the pain, he was dismayed and surprised at the fact that the King was trying to shake the unconscious girl awake in human form.

”Touka,” He cried out loud, desperately shaking her shoulders. “Are you okay? Answer me!”

In the span of about a single second, Kazuichi realised he had made the worst mistake of his life.

He could see tears forming in the King’s eyes as he believed the woman in front of him to be dead from Kazuichi’s asphyxiation. He could see the despair form in his eyes when Touka stopped breathing, and the complete agony shaking his very being when he failed to stir her.

Kazuichi wanted to revive the girl. It was the only way for him to atone for the sin he had just commited moments before without knowing how important the barely moving woman in front of him was the King.

Acting quickly, he pried himself off the floor and rushed to Touka’s side. He wasn’t specially trained in combat, but he was specially trained in medical arts. He propped Touka onto his leg and pressed his hand against her throat. He sighed in relief when he found that he hadn’t crushed her throat to the point it would have damaged her larynx. She still stood a high chance of being resurrected if he acted fast.

He pressed his ear against her chest, almost sobbing when he heard her heartbeat still beating almost normally. Almost. He had to act quickly before her brain suffered damage from the lack of oxygen.

He counted about forty seconds since he was thrown off like some rag doll. She could still be saved.

Kazuichi laid her gently on the ground and pressed both his palms to her stomach. It wasn’t very difficult, but he had to instill the right amount of pressure on her stomach to, hopefully, cause her body to have a reflex and force her to cough.

He pressed down on her stomach with the smallest amount of force her could muster that would cause her to reflex and not damage her organs.

Thankfully, it had worked.

The acid and food in her stomach had been forced up her gullet, which had forced her body to perform a gag reflex to keep it down, and that was what had caused her to violently cough and throw up what she had eaten earlier.

The King was patting her back and whispering encouraging words to her. Then, without a single word or glance at Kazuichi, he had scooped the coughing girl into his arms and returned back to the castle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please note that the gag reflex through pressing on the stomach mentioned in the story is likely not true in real medical terms and in no way should you attempt it if you are near someone who is dying from asphyxiation.


	6. Dislike

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apparently, listening to the Naruto OST that played when Minato saved Kushina is a great way for me to churn out words

One side of Ken’s mind argued that Kazuichi thought Touka was trying to attack him somehow (though he really couldn’t see how cuddling looked like she was attacking him). The other side argued that Kazuichi should be beheaded for not knowing. Even if he didn’t know, he should have asked before strangling Touka to near death.

At the castle’s door to the inside, he hesitated. There was no place for her to stay inside the castle yet; the older generation of servants had already taken up the beds and wouldn’t be leaving for another few days. On top of that, he didn’t even know where she stayed. He wasn’t going to go track down where she lived, it would just make him look like some freak. He wasn’t going to ask an older generation servant to leave the castle earlier, that would just be rude.

Ken took a sharp breath. He could place her in Hide or Shuu’s room, but she might wake up alarmed and in distress. Kaya wasn’t the kind to share her bed with someone she didn’t know. Nishiki already had a woman of his own. And Koma... No.

His only other option was either his own room or Kazuichi’s room, and he wasn’t about to place her in the room of a man who tried to kill her.

For the second time of the day; _To hell with it all._

After making sure that nobody was nearby to see him, he quickly ran up the stairs and into his room.

When he was in the safety of his own room, he laid Touka on his bed and inspected her face.

Her face was marked with tear streaks from all the effort she exerted with her skinny body to pry Kazuichi off of her. An unexplainable emotion swirled in his chest and mind when his eyes fell on the red marks on her neck. They would bruise within one or two days, and would be a reminder of what she had to go through.

She was barely conscious now. Her eyes were hazy and her forehead was beaded with sweat.

”Touka,” He called out worriedly. “Can you hear me?”

Touka blinked slowly, then her pupils turned ever so slowly to focus at him. The look in her eyes made it more than obvious that she was confused as to where she was now.

”Touka, you need to rest,” Ken said softly. “You are fine now, but you need to rest. Do not leave this room until I say you can go, do you understand me?”

She gave a lazy nod in response. Her mind felt light and clouded with nonsense.

Was she imagining a pair of lips on her forehead?

* * *

When Kazuichi heard the bell in his office ringing, he thought that they were bells sent from the heavens, a sign that he would be dying soon.

No matter what, all of them had to answer as soon as they heard the bell in their offices ring. Kazuichi was no exception to this rule. 

With shaky legs and trembling hands, he made his way towards the King’s office, silently praying to all the gods he could name. Sweat poured down his face once he was at the King’s door. His feet felt ice cold and his fingers were numb.

He didn’t even have to knock before the King’s voice came from behind the door.

”Come in.”

At this point, Kazuichi swore that if he somehow made it out of this alive he would dedicate his entire life to making sure both Touka and the King were happy.

When he first stepped into the room, he was practically slapped in the face from all the rage that was emanating from the King. He didn’t dare look up at the man’s visible eye, too scared of whatever emotion would be gazing at him.

”Kazuichi.” The King said softly. His voice was heavy, like he was restraining himself from outright screaming at him.

Kazuichi didn’t waste a single moment. As soon as he was in front of the King, he had gotten down on one knee and bowed his head, his right hand was fisted in the cloth area closest to his heart.

”Forgive me, my King,” He whispered, his voice cracking. “I did not know how important that woman was to you. I have made a horrible mistake. If it would please you and quell your rage, please take my head and whatever little dignity I have left.”

He received no answer, but he could hear the King rise from his grand chair, his footsteps echoing through the room as he circled around him, like a predator taunting it’s prey on how helpless it was.

A drip of sweat landed on the fancy carpet beneath him.

It felt like an eternity had passed before the King gave any sort of answer.

”I am enraged,” The King said, his voice coming out in a deep rumble. “I understand that you meant no harm as you are my shield and that you wanted to protect me. However, I cannot overlook the fact that you almost murdered her before my own eyes.”

Kazuichi was silent.

”Do you know who she is?” He asked, a sigh coming through his nose.

”No, my King.” He answered honestly. How could he have known who she was? He only met her today.

”Do you remember the day you became one of my servants?” The King asked. “It was only a day after my return from escaping the kingdom after the fire had taken the lives of my parents.”

”Yes, my King.”

He would never forget. He would never forget the pain in his heart upon seeing the little child being crowned the new king. Never forget how stressful his new position was to him that his hair turned completely white.

”I am sure that Shuu has told you that a small family had taken care of me when I had ran away. Do you remember this?”

Kazuichi looked up, surprised to see the nostalgic yet angry look in the King’s eye as he gazed back at him.

“She was part of the family that cared for me,” The King said softly. “She was the one who treated this.”

He removed the eyepatch that covered his right eye, revealing the ugly pink flesh that hid beneath it. 

To say Kazuichi was astonished was an understatement. He had almost murdered the woman who had saved the King when he was a child. God knows how much they’ve bonded when they were children. If he had killed her, it would be the equivalent of murdering Shuu or Hideyoshi.

A tear rolled down the King’s eye as he adjusted the eyepatch back onto his face. “Do you know what would’ve happened to you if you had murdered her?” He asked in a soft voice that was laced with hidden rage.

Kazuichi said nothing, but he lowered his head again, too afraid to look back up.

Suddenly, the King’s face was next to his.

” _You would have been dead at where you stood_.”

* * *

Ken reentered his room after a few more hours of writing and signing papers. He felt tired and completely drained, even though he had spent a few hours sleeping pleasantly with Touka by his side.

He smiled softly at the sight. Touka was practically buried within his blankets and sleeping peacefully, her even breathing causing the blankets to move up and down slightly. He enjoyed the sight of a splash of light blue within his dull white blankets. Her scent was strong in the air, and comforting to him.

Though he felt a strong sense and need to just curl up beside her a sleep for eternity, he needed to make sure she was feeling alright. 

He propped himself in the space next to her and gently unraveled the blankets, revealing the red marks on her neck that made him wince. 

“Touka.” He whispered gently.

His response was her snuggling even deeper into his blankets.

This time, Ken shook her gently. “Touka, wake up.”

Her eyes fluttered, and she gazed up at him with tired eyes, which then widened and she scrambled up in his bed.

”Calm down,” He said, gently rubbing his hand up and down her back in a comforting manner. “It’s just me.”

Touka visibly relaxed, but not by much. 

“Where am I?” She asked quietly, now refusing to met his gaze.

“You’re in my room.” He replied, tilting her chin up with a finger, frowning when she was averting her eyes from him. “Why won’t you look at me?”

She sighed, then turned to face him. She didn’t even last a full five seconds before her eyes traveled to her right again.

”...are you not comfortable with me?” He asked. He was seriously confused. Hadn’t she just spent the entire afternoon cuddling up next to him?

Touka pursed her lips, and though about her answer for a while before deciding to tell him. “It isn’t that I’m not comfortable with you, it’s just... I’m not used to it.”

Ken frowned beneath his mask. “Not used to it?”

He was a smart man, being praised for his genius acts that made the kingdom what it was today. But when it came to Touka, he was an idiot.

”Is it my mask?” He asked hurriedly. Would she feel better if she saw the familiar scars? “I can take it off if you want.”

Touka shook her head quickly. “No, no! It isn’t your mask. It’s the fact that—uh—I am not used to this.”

She gestured towards his entire body, and he frowned in confusion.

”I am still the same as back then.” He tried.

She shook her head again, but she gave a small smile this time. “I know you’re still the same. You’re still the same little puppy I took home that day. But, I’m just not used to your human form. All the time when we were younger, I’d only seen you in wolf form, nothing else. This is a huge change for me, and... I’m just not used to it.”

His visible eye crinkled, but there was sadness and regret swimming within his gray irises. “You have to get used to it, Touka. With you, I may not have a problem, but by myself, I dislike being a wolf.”

Touka gave him a confused look. A sign for him to explain why.

”When Shuu—that large wolf that came on the day I left—took me home, he made me go through combat classes with him in the event someone came after me,” He said quietly, looking away as if it pained him to talk about this. “It was accidental, but he pushed me until he split my lip and I tasted blood.”

Touka nodded, giving him the cue to continue talking. She seemed curious.

”I don’t remember much of it, but I remember passing out, and waking up with Shuu half dead in front of me,” He whispered. “I remember it clearly. Half his ribs were broken, and blood was pouring out of his body. I was so scared, but I ran for the doctor.”

He took a sharp intake of breath. “Afterwards, Shuu wanted to test something. He locked me in a room with a criminal on death sentence, then told the man to injure me until I could taste blood, it didn’t matter whose it was. When that eventually happened, the same thing occured; I lost consciousness then woke up, but the man was dead. His body had been mutilated until he looked nothing like a human anymore.”

He could see Touka with shock evident in her eyes. She didn’t expect him to be so violent.

”I’m violent as a wolf,” Ken said softly. “If I taste blood, my body and being turn into a savage monster with no other desire than to kill others to taste blood. It happens until I wake up again. Time and time again, Shuu tested this until he was certain that I would become a blood thirsty monster as a wolf.”

Touka didn’t know what to say. This poor man had been somewhat experimented on to test his abilities. She could feel the tremendous amount of guilt he would have felt as a child, killing all those people for the sake of knowing how dangerous he was.

The man shook his head sadly. “The only comfort I have is that I never heard their screaming.”


	7. Dilemma

Touka saw very little of the King in the next few days. She had slept in his bed after he had told her of his tragic past, and went off the next day after waking up. She did her duties; serving him his cup of tea at designated times. Nothing more, and nothing less.

Internally, she felt conflicted. His appearance as a wolf calmed her, as it would bring back happy childhood memories when she still had a family and enjoyed a life of playing. But, he did not like being a wolf due to his past. She felt conflicted because she preferred him as a wolf, and not the human he was and liked to be. Touka decided she needed to heed his words of getting used to his appearance.

It was two days later when things started to happen. She was preparing to move out from the inn and into the castle the next day, and the older generation of servants were preparing to move out. When she had arrived in the castle for that day, she was puzzled to see a dark carriage pulled by emaciated horses outside the castle gates, and even more puzzled at the unfamiliar faces standing outside the castle. She recognised Sir Hideyoshi, and frowned at the frightened look in his eyes as he nervously glanced at her.

A tall, bulky man with blonde hair and slits for eyes stood outside the castle. He wore a fancy white silk tunic embroidered with gold threads that was covered with a fur cloak. The crown on his head was more than enough information that this was a king from a neighbouring kingdom. Which king, however, she did not know.

As protocol for the servants, she bowed to the second king, who regarded her with his chin in the air. His demeanour unnerved her, and she quickly entered the castle, hoping that she wouldn’t have to run into this king again.

In the kitchen, she could faintly hear the two kings discussing matters. It wasn’t any of her business, so she decided to shut it out as she prepared the tea for the king and his higher ups. Her predecessor had told her to not bother making any tea for the other king and his own subjects, as they were not the ones she served. However, she was told to make the tea if they requested for it.

Even before she managed to get the water boiling, the King had suddenly appeared in the kitchen, ducking down beneath the counters and suspiciously glancing up after a few moments.

”My King?” She quipped in confusion.

”Hush,” He told her. “Are the higher ups from Kingdom Aogiri gone?”

She looked past the kitchen, seeing a strange man with white hair and blood red eyes looking around before wandering off.

”Someone just left.” She told him.

“Give me their description.”

”Um...” Touka tried giving her best description possible. “He had white hair and red eyes, and was wearing a long, white tunic.”

The King sighed in relief and stood up, meeting her eyes. “I am sorry for the confusion I caused you, but doing this is for my survival.” 

“My King, who are these people?” She asked.

He regarded her with unreadable eyes. “They are the king and higher ups from Kingdom Aogiri. King Yamori has requested that I discuss matters with his. However, this is a undercover, as his real plans are to assassinate me and take control of this kingdom.”

Touka was taken aback. “What will you do?”

”I cannot remain in one location in the castle for very long.” He explained. “The higher ups will attempt to find and assassinate me. Therefore, I cannot stay in my office and have to constantly look for places to hide. It is a blessing that none of them are wolves that can detect my scent.”

She raised her eyebrows slightly, still attempting to absorb the information. “Then, what will you do if they manage to catch you?”

He shrugged. “Fight. What else can I do?”

Touka thought about this, and the results were strange to her. “Wouldn’t killing them result in war between the kingdoms?”

The King stared at the stone floor. “What other choice do I have? King Yamori would want this. He wants money, and he wants it all. Taking over this kingdom is basically earning a goldmine for him. He is willing to sacrifice half his kingdom in order to get this kingdom.”

War was never an easy one for any of the kingdoms, no matter how advanced their army was or how hard they fought. Lives would be lost in the end and families would mourn until they pass. She had never seen a war unfold in her life before, but she did know how it would end up because of her father.

Her father had fought in a war once when he was younger and more on the wild side. He met a woman—Touka’s mother—after the war, and they had Touka, and soon after, her brother, Ayato.

However, her father had made a mistake in the war; he had chosen to be sadistic and cruel to another young man who was attempting to assassinate their leader. Instead of killing him off for good, her father had left him crippled by crushing the bones in the man’s legs, then tossing him into the river. Understandably, the man had developed a grudge against her father, and sent men to kill him after he had located where he was living with his family.

Touka shut her eyes at the memory of her parents screaming, her father rushing to scoop both her and her brother into his arms and running for it while her mother attempted to reason the men out from their orders.

It didn’t work. She never saw her mother, or the corpse, ever again.

She was grieving for months until they found a new home to live in, safe from the man that had demanded her father’s head. It was around that time when she found the King as a small pup, and her life continued from there.

”What are you thinking about?” The King asked, worry in his voice. She might have showed some form of emotion on her face.

Touka shook her head and managed a weak smile, a sad attempt to hide how her memories were affecting her.

”Nothing.”

* * *

”...henceforth, I will send one of my most loyal companions to you and you will send one to me.”

Ken was struggling to maintain a straight and serious facade that hid his internal struggle of fighting against his anxiousness.

”Of course.” He replied with a serious and even tone.

They were discussing about the various medical plants that grew in their respective kingdoms. Kingdom Goat contained the medical plants needed for the ill patients in Kingdom Aogiri to continue living, but they had no one who knew how to use the plant. It was vice versa for Kingdom Aogiri. Thus, the two kings had come to an agreement that they would send their best medic to one another to mentor the medics in the respective kingdom on how to use the plant and how to grow it.

Ken wasn’t an idiot.

King Yamori arranged for this in the event that his assassination attempt failed. If the people he had hired this time around failed, the medic sent to him could easily poison him with a drug that could prove fatal without his own head medic around.

He struggled to think of a loophole through it as King Yamori smiled at him. It was a disturbing smile that was full of sadism.

”If I may ask, what conditions are your citizens in that require the ginger plant?” He asked, trying to keep the conversation going as he desperately tried to reverse the decision if his cleverness outwitted Yamori’s evil intentions.

The other king had mentioned something about his patients being prone to asthma and diabetes, which the ginger plant (that couldn’t grow in Kingdom Aogiri) could help to fight against or potentially cure.

Ken nodded his head, preparing to ask something else before the other king had decided to speak up.

”Why do you mask your face?”

Ken instantly turned defensive. It was a sensitive topic for him and he loathed to discuss about it with anybody that didn’t know about his condition.

”Is it any of your business?” He responded coldly.

Still keeping the disturbed smile on his face, King Yamori held his hands up in surrender, the gold bracelets on his arms jingled slightly as he did. 

“Of course not,” He said. “I was merely curious. I have never seen your face before, not even at our annual Kings’ Meeting. Forgive me if I have offended you.”

His anger did not calm down like he was usually able to will it to. The pressure of evading his upcoming assassination attempt, having to deal with King Yamori and his disgusting behaviour, and inability to get any work done due to not being able to stay in one position was starting to take its toll on him.

How would he survive a few days of this gruelling madness?

”We are finished,” Ken said coldly, all traces of nervousness had evaporated from his body. “Leave this room before I regret my decision.”

This seemed to put King Yamori in a bad mood. His smile dropped and was replaced by a frown and an angered look in his eyes. He was much taller than Ken was, and looked down at him, as if thinking that he was vermin that didn’t have the rights to talk to him in that manner, but he said nothing as he left the room.

When Ken was certain that the other man was out of earshot, he let out a long exhale. Rubbing his temples, he wondered how he would cope with all of this. The other king was obviously displeased with his attitude towards him, which may cause his assassination to come sooner than expected.

He just _had_ to let his emotions get the better of him, even for a short while. 

Staring at the stack of papers on his desk, he sighed again. If he wasn’t going to get any work done, he should just go do something else.

Leaning back on his chair, he stared out the large window in his office. It gave him a perfect view of the castle gardens. He hoped Touka would be there, then maybe he could enjoy some time with her in privacy.

He frowned when he saw that she wasn’t there, but thought that he wouldn’t have minded if she was there or not, as he would only be going there to calm himself. If Touka were to be there, she could calm him a bit further, but she wasn’t necessary.

His nose told him otherwise when he made it into the garden. 

Touka was in the garden, just too tiny for him to see from his office when she was in her rabbit form.

She was actually napping in the grass.

He smiled at the sight, then frowned. Anyone could just pick her up and leave if she was sleeping deeply. But, he was here now, and she didn’t have to worry about that.

The cry of an eagle caught his attention before he could lie down next to the sleeping rabbit. There were no eagles in Kingdom Goat that were allowed to take flight within castle boundaries. He stared intently at it, his eye following it wherever it was flying. He was too distracted by the mysterious eagle that he hadn’t noticed that something had tackled him to the floor.

In an effort to not crush Touka, he shifted halfway in his fall, just managing to balance himself on his four paws before his entire body collapsed and crushed Touka.

He growled at his attackers. There were three of them in total, and they were all in animal forms to prevent him from recognising any of them; a lion, a tiger and the eagle that distracted him earlier on.

This was it. This was him about to be assassinated. 

But he wouldn’t allow that to happen.


	8. Defence

Ken wasn’t afraid. The three animals he was up against were less than half his size when he was in wolf form. He smirked to himself. This would be an easy fight.

The tiger lunged. Ken had crouched down and was preparing to sink his own fangs into the opposing animal before he felt a sharp pain at the back of his neck, and his body began to reel backwards.

Glancing back, he realised that the eagle had clawed its talons into his neck, and was dragging him away as best as it could while it still had a hold on him.

He was ready to pull his body forward and shake the eagle off, but the lion and tiger had both made their moves on him. The duo had bitten down on his chest and dug their claws dangerously deep into his throat.

Ken cursed mentally. He had underestimated them because he certain that he could win against them with his sheer power and size. He didn’t expect that they had a battle strategy that countered his large size and immense strength.

_Just one drop,_ He thought to himself. Only a single drop of blood that would fill his tastebuds would be needed for him to completely dominate the three of them and win the battle. 

It shouldn’t have been so difficult to get a single drop of blood, but they made it so. The injury on his chest and neck were out of reach from his tongue, and he couldn’t even pause to scrap the blood against his paw to lick it off, they wouldn’t let him. Each time he attempted to stop his movements, he would either be dragged away again, or be tackled to the ground and have a part of him bitten.

His entire world was spinning from how much his body was being thrown around like a sack of potatoes. His vision started to grow red from the frustration and rage he felt at being so helpless against three animals that barely measured up to half his size. He was a king; someone who was supposed to have won countless battles against men who dared to challenge him. But no, now he was being beaten up by three men and was helpless to defend himself or even fight back.

Somewhere in between the constant shreds of pain his body was enduring, Touka had woken up. He could see her worried and scared eyes staring at him as she desperately thought of a way to help him.

_Go,_ He wanted to scream at her. But his voice never came out.

Then, it happened. He saw her frantically reaching for a sharp stone, then she dug it into her palm. He watched with a tired yet worried brain. What was she doing? He could see frustration evident in her eyes as she practically stabbed the sharp edge into her hand. The cut was so deep that he could see blood trickling down her wrist and forearm. His confusion only grew when he saw the satisfaction in her eyes.

Her eyes landed on his open mouth, and she flicked her wrist in his direction. She was just close enough for the blood to fly off her hand and into his mouth.

It happened.

The rush of hot adrenaline that he felt pumping through his veins, as if his blood had transformed into a river of lava and was coursing through his entire body. The excitement of battle filled his mind. His body was now devoid of any pain and he was ready to fight again.

Then, darkness. 

It wasn’t a stranger to him. It happened each time he tasted blood. He would wander around in darkness for some time before a light would appear and he would walk towards it, which then caused him to awaken in the real world.

It was the same thing now. He was just stuck in his consciousness until he woke up again.

Sighing to himself, he started to walk. He had already forgotten the reason why he was here the moment he had gotten up from his original position on the floor. 

His steps were slow and heavy. He had all the time in the world in his mind, so why rush? He was alone and in peace in his mind, and he enjoyed that very, very much. 

Being alone and in a place where no one could appear it made it easy for him to collect his thoughts and lay them out so he could organise them.

He started with dealing with Yamori. The idea was for the both of them to send a medic to the other so that they could learn about the medical plants that grew in the respective kingdoms. What if he could add more? He could tell Nishiki to do the same to Yamori; poison him with the best and most lethal poison he had on hand. Yamori knew Ken as the king who tended to avoid conflicts and solve everything with peace. He would never suspect that Ken would be attempting to kill him.

Next, he thought about his higher ups. A pang of guilt stabbed itself into his heart. He had been working them so hard for so long, giving them whole stacks of papers for them to look through, and forcing them to burn the midnight oil in order to get the papers to him in time. They deserved a break. He nodded to himself as he decided to send them on a vacation to Kingdom CCG. They would be safe there, and the king and queen there would treat them well if they were to meet.

Ken thought about his late parents. It had been a while since he had visited their graves. He should pay them a visit and tell them about his life since... since that day.

And Touka. 

He didn’t have a chance to think about what he would do with her, because an ear piercing scream alerted him as he bolted up. The light to reality was there again, and he ran towards it, his heart thumping at what could have possibly caused the scream. He didn’t even know if it was from one of the three animals, Touka, or even himself. He just wanted to know what caused it.

The light seemed out of reach. It had never happened before. It seemed as if the more he ran, the further the light to reality was. 

The screams only grew louder as he desperately chased after the light. Pleas for mercy and screams for him to back off were all he could hear. 

The crowded screams eventually faded to only one. It was then that the light started to slow down, enough for Ken to run up to it and dive through the light and into reality.

He wasn’t expecting his face to be so close to Touka’s when his vision cleared. He wasn’t expecting the blood that was covering her entire body, dripping down her face. He wasn’t expecting her to be staring at him with an indescribable fear in her eyes that practically jabbed its way into his heart.

He never expected himself to be the reason why she was so scared, though he could see why she would be so frightened of him.

His large and wounded body was looming over her small and frail body. Blood that wasn't his own was pouring out from his jaws, which were hovering right over Touka's head. His heart sank. In his fit of unconscious rage, he had attempted to bite off her head.

Slowly, he took a step back, too overwhelmed with the fact that his body would even dare to do such a thing to her when he was unconscious. When he took a second step back, his paw landed in something soft and squishy. His stomach lurched uncomfortably when he turned around to see what he had stepped in.

The lion and the tiger had both been mutilated beyond a recognisable state. In his rage, he had attacked blindly. Both of the two dead animals had sustained injuries that were too horrible to look at. The tiger's body had literally been snapped in half and wounded with large bite marks that Ken realised were his own. The bite marks were so deep that they had punctured through the tiger completely, and drained its body of all its blood, which was seeping into the ground now, staining the grass to a red colour as it did.

It was not much different for the lion, only that its body was intact, but its skull crushed. Ken almost threw up at the sight of an eyeball that was on the ground, it stared at him and gave him shivers down his spine. It was almost as if the lion was still attempting to watch him even in death. 

The eagle was the only one that survived. Barely. From the position it was in, Ken realised that it had attempted to fly away just before it could be killed by him. Luckily or unluckily for it, it had flown just out of Ken's range of murder. Even now with its broken wing and holes through it stomach, it was still attempting to flee.

Ken directed his attention back to Touka, who was still staring at him with shock and fear filled eyes. 

_That wasn't me,_ He wanted to tell her.  _My body acted on its own. I told you about it already!_

He wanted so badly to erase the fear from her eyes. To place her under some spell that would make her forget everything she had seen with her own two eyes; him going berserk, snapping the tiger's body into two and crushing the lion's head, relishing the taste of their blood as he bit into their bodies. The fact that he had turned to her as his next target...

Shifting back, he realised that he could not blame it on the fact that he had went berserk. Even if he was not in his right state of mind, he still ended up switching to her as his next target. God knows what he would've done to her. He could have plunged his claws through her body and kill her. He could have torn off her head with his jaws, and she would be left screaming for him to stop. He could have destroyed her body like he did with the other animals. He could have--

The sound of rustling clothes attracted his attention. Touka was standing on shaky legs as she gaped at him, her eyes traveled to the mutilated animal corpses behind him and her eyes only widened further.

Sensing that she was going to run away from him out of fear, he reached towards her. “Touka...”

He was surprised when she didn’t flinch away from his touch. Her frail body was completely still as his bloodied hand gently touched her cheek.

“I’m sorry,” He whispered. “I didn’t mean to frighten you. You knew I had no control over my body in that state.”

Touka spoke with a shaky voice, “I—I am the one to blame. I was the one who forced you into th—that state...”

How was it her fault? He was getting beaten up and her throwing her blood at him gave him the chance to fend off his assailants and destroy the assassination attempt.

”But I frightened you, didn’t I?” He murmured next to her ear. “Having to see me slaughter them, then turn to you before regaining my consciousness. It was scary, wasn’t it?”

Touka couldn’t resist the urge to nod. Her entire body was shaking from the immense terror she experienced earlier on. 

“I’m sorry,” He said again. “I’m so, so sorry.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The more I write this, the more I cringe at the original version. I really don’t understand how you guys enjoyed the original version. And good news: this version should be longer because I’m planning to add way more plot than before.


	9. Confrontation

She was scared of him.

He didn’t blame her. He had frightened her enough with his slaughters and attempt on her life.

From the assassination attempt, to the amount of work that had piled up, the fact that Yamori was still here, his aching body, and that he had caused her to distant herself from him was frustrating him to no end. His face had contoured itself into a scowl after he had let her run back to the castle bloodied and scared.

Even now as he was furiously scribbling on the sheet of paper on his desk, his frown was etched onto his face almost permanently. His injured arm ached from writing so much, but he paid it no heed.

A knock on his office door attracted his attention, and he grunted in response.

Nishiki let himself in. He could tell from the scent of wine in the air.

”My King.” Nishiki said, a slight nervousness in his tone. This was when Ken knew that his current attitude scared Nishiki, because almost everything he did would not faze Nishiki unless it was something terribly serious.

”What do you want?” He snapped.

An audible swallow filled the room. “The maids have found the mutilated bodies of two animals. King Yamori says that they were men from his higher ups. Would you know the cause of their deaths?”

A loud snap resounded throughout the room. Ken had snapped his quill pen in half.

”I do not know, and I do not care.” He practically snarled.

A bead of sweat trickled down Nishiki’s face. He would be facing Death himself with his next few words. 

“King Yamori wants to discuss this with you.”

Horrible, horrible mistake.

”Then, bring him here!” Ken yelled, bolting up from his chair. “Tell him to face me himself and tell him to ‘discuss’ his plans of assassinating me! Tell him to understand when I killed them in self defence!”

Fear quaked off Nishiki as he struggled to hide the emotion in his voice. “Y-Yes sir, right away.”

Ken sat back down on his chair angrily as Nishiki fled the room. He glared at his broken quill before tossing it into the bin next to him with a little too much force. The bin swayed slightly before tumbling back onto a stable position.

He was livid. Yamori sent men to assassinate him, and  _he_ wants to discuss about their deaths? He must be bloody joking for Ken to oh-so-kindly ask for his forgiveness.

A knock on his door again, and Ken did not hesitate to stand up, and practically rip the door off it’s hinges, ready to scream at the towering man before him.

Except, no one was there when he looked up. There was no scent of disgusting blood. There wasn’t even a foreboding presence that would slap him in the face each time he saw Yamori.

There was only the scent of freshly brewed tea, a distant scent of stew, and a presence that would calm him each time he was near it.

Touka.

His anger dissipated into thin air as he looked down at the short woman in front of him. She seemed nervous. Again, he didn’t blame her; he wasn’t the kind to just rip a door off to allow someone into his office.

”M-My King,” She murmured slightly, struggling to not look at him. “Your tea.”

He stared at the small goblet of tea in her hands and gently took it into his own. “Come into my office after you are done serving tea to the rest of the higher ups.” He said softly.

Fear danced in her eyes as she snapped her head up to look at him, but the dance softened when she saw the gaze he was looking at her with. It held no malice, neither did it hold any blood thirst like the eyes she had seen just yesterday. His visible eye only held a tender, loving look.

”Yes. My king.” She said quietly, bowing slightly before wander towards the next room.

As he returned to his seat he pondered how Touka was able to calm his rage with just her presence alone. How had she extinguished flames with only a wave of her hand?

He sighed softly before opening his drawer and drawing out a new quill pen. The first one he had to change since he began paperwork as a child. And to think the one he used previously was broken out of rage. He chuckled at the thought of it.

He had only managed to write a complete sentence before a knock from his door was heard again.

”Come in.” He said, his voice now calmer.

Unexpectantly, it was Touka.

”Come here.” He drawled, standing up from his seat yet again.

The woman glanced sideways from the outside before hesitantly stepping into the king’s office.

”Don’t be scared,” Ken said in an encouraging voice. “Come closer.”

She took a few steps forward until she was in front of his table.

Ken eyed her up and down, assessing if she had any injuries even though he knew that she wouldn’t have any.

”I trust that you moved in alright?” He said, coughing softly. He was attempting to lighten up the mood in the room.

Touka said nothing, but she nodded.

He could still see her body trembling. Memories from yesterday flashed into his mind; her fearful eyes, the fact that he was so close to crushing her skull with his jaws, how she was struggling to keep her voice calm even though she was terrified of him.

”You don’t have to be scared of me,” He said tenderly, slowly walking towards her. “I will never hurt you. I had no control of my body yesterday.”

Touka shut her eyes as she was, once again, painfully reminded of the graphic scenes of the King tearing apart the duo’s bodies as they pleaded for mercy. Though she knew that they deserved death for attempting to assassinate the King, she also knew that they didn’t deserve to die such a tortuous death; pleading for their lives until the very end.

He was about arms length away from her now, his hands held up as a way to get her to see that he meant her no harm.

It was useless. That’s what he thought. Even if she knew that he wouldn’t hurt her, her body was instinctively protecting her from him. He could tell from the fact that her hands were slowly being raised in front of her.

He took another step forward, and she took another step back. Her hands were covering her face now. Whether it was out of fear or out of shame, she didn’t know.

Ken extended a hand towards her, and she flinched. From her action, he withdrew his hand quickly as if she was a fire that had just burnt him.

He did not let her actions faze him, as he continued walking slowly towards her, his footsteps echoed throughout the large room. He could see a panicked look in her eyes after she had backed up so much that her back was pressed against the door.

”Touka,” He murmured softly, slowly walking towards her until he was less than an inch away from her. “Look at me.”

Her hands refused to budge from her face, and he decided to gently take them down with his own.

“Please,” he pleaded as he grasped Touka’s hand, gently guiding it away from her face. Even with her hands gone, she still refused to look at him; her eyes were averted to her right.

He could see sweat beading on her face. She was nervous, confused, and downright terrified of him. He needed some way to make her feel safe around him again, like how he always made her feel when they were children.

Without even thinking, he gently lowered his face, nuzzling the side of his face into her cheek gently. She flinched at his action, her breath hitched and she struggled to breathe properly. She couldn’t even identify what she felt anymore; fear, nostalgia, or whatever. All she could identify was her frantic beating heart and warmth that spread from it throughout her chest.

”Don’t be scared,” He said again, reaching up to undo a small part of his mask so he could feel his own skin on hers. “I won’t hurt you. Ever.”

He released her hands, and they fell back to her sides limply. She was too shocked to move them back to cover her face.

”You’ll be safe with me,” He whispered, slowly wrapping his arms around her waist, pulling her closer to him. He could feel her erratic heartbeat, and it did little to calm him down from the intense feelings he was experiencing in his heart.

* * *

 

Ken ran his hand through his white hair and gave a loud sigh. He had let her go a few moments after holding her in his arms, and she had only left the room quickly, but she failed to hide the pale red on her cheeks.

Really, he wasn’t sure what he was feeling at the moment. He felt happy to be able to share a moment with her, but he also felt a sense of regret from seeing her terror filled eyes. Again, he didn’t blame her. He was the one who caused her to feel such emotions.

Another knock on his door.

”Come in.” He called out, expecting one of his higher ups.

It was Yamori.

Ken blanched. He really wasn’t looking forward to this.

”Nameless King,” The blonde man drawled with a nasty grin. “I’d like to discuss matters regarding my higher ups.”

Ken spoke in an even voice, not betraying any of the emotions he felt. “Go ahead.”

”Two of my higher ups were found dead,” Yamori said, trailing his finger across the masked man’s desk. “Their bodies mutilated. One of them had their entire body snapped into two, and the other had his head crushed. The one who survived said that you were the one who assasulted them.”

Ken almost wanted to laugh. They had the audacity to say that when he had the wounds to show that they had attacked him as well?

”They were the ones who assaulted me,” He said coolly. “I was merely defending myself so that I may continue to rule over  _my_  kingdom.”

Yamori’s right eye twitched ever so slightly, but it did not go unnoticed by Ken. “Do you have any proof?”

”Are the heavy wounds on my body not enough proof for you?” Ken challenged. “Look at the marks on my arms and back, they are clear signs of claw marks from your higher ups.”

To prove his point, Ken rolled up the sleeve on his left arm, revealing the red marks on his skin. 

”And how do I know if you had assaulted them and they were merely trying to defend themselves against you?” Yamori asked, his cool demeanour had faded to a look of seriousness and anger. He didn’t want to lose this battle.

”I have a witness.” Ken said, the words tumbling out of his mouth before he even registered what he said. It was true, Touka had saw the entire thing unfold before her eyes.

Yamori’s eyebrows raised in surprise. “Bring them up.”

Ken was mentally slapping himself as he rang for Nishiki. He was surely going to the deepest layer of Hell for doing this to Touka. To put her in a room with two men that frightened her to no end was the last thing he wanted to do to her. But he had no choice if he wanted to avoid war with Kingdom Aogiri.

Nishiki was quick to respond, likely due to him fearing that Ken would unleash his rage upon him if he did not respond fast enough. The glasses wearing man knocked on the door before entering swiftly, his eyes widening slightly upon seeing the murderous look in King Yamori's eyes.

"My King?" He questioned quickly, not wanting to stay in the same room as the other king.

"Nishiki, I request for you to bring Touka to my office," Ken said in a commanding manner. "She is a maid with light blue hair that covers her right eye. Send her up as soon as you can. If she is not in the castle, search for her in the kingdom itself. Make it quick."

"Yes, my King." Nishiki said before fleeing the room. He couldn't stand to be in the same room as King Yamori. The air the man himself breathed out was of pure destruction as chaos, in his own opinion. He knew that this man was capable of wiping out any of them with his brute strength alone. The King was a powerful and dangerous ruler, and he couldn't understand why the man was crowned king in the first place.

He frantically ran down the stairs, bolting into the servants' quarters and making a wild gaze throughout the entire room, scanning the area for the woman the king described. When he could not find her, he turned to the nearest maid; Hinami.

"Maid," He said, out of breath. "Have you seen Touka?"

The woman seemed startled for a brief moment, but she gave her answer quickly, "I believe she went out to the gardens. If you do not see her, she is a rabbit frolicking around."

"Thank you." Nishiki said as he dashed out of the room in search of the woman.

 _Rabbit,_ he thought in amusement as he ran,  _both the kings are predators of rabbits, what are they going to do to her?_

As he pushed through the castle back door, his eyes quickly found a lone woman wearing the maid uniform sitting idly on the grass. Light blue hair, like the king himself said.

"Maid!" He yelled.

The woman turned, and Nishiki could see that her hair did cover her right eye. He had found the correct person.

"The King requests your presence in his office this instant!" He said as he ran towards her.

Upon nearing her, he could see fear visibly cloud over her visible eye as she stood up quickly. "Why has the King requested for me?"

 _Do you expect me to know?_  Nishiki wanted to say, but he swallowed those words and said something else, "It is classified information."

Nishiki could practically feel her face blanch as he turned his back on her. "Hurry, the King does not want to be kept waiting."

He heard her murmur something along the lines of 'of course he doesn't', but he chose not to say anything. She would be in the same room as both kings, and that itself was pressurising enough.

He led her up the stairs and to the King's room, avoiding the stares of the other servants as he did so. It would seem unnatural to people if a higher up, of all people, was leading a maid somewhere. Most people would get the wrong idea, and they had every right to be so. Nishiki had been told stories that other kingdoms' higher ups would abuse their position to get a maid into their beds. But he was not one of those men. He would never be.

"Go inside," He spoke to Touka in a hushed whisper, not wanting to attract any of King Yamori's attention to himself. He quickly left after that, leaving Touka to the two kings and praying that she would survive whatever they were going to put her through. He was not worried about his own king, as he knew he was not the type of man to force a woman into submission. King Yamori, however...

He chose not to dwell on the thought.

* * *

 

Touka had to bite her lip to prevent herself from making a noise from fear. She had no issues in being in the same room as the Nameless King, he had already promised her that he would never harm her, and she trusted him from their times as children. However, she had heard horror stories of King Yamori’s reign in Kingdom Aogiri. He let no man out of his kingdom, and the only ones who were able to leave the kingdom itself would be his higher ups and no one else. Any citizen that attempted to escape the kingdom would be executed upon being captured. The few citizens that did manage to escape somehow had fled to Kingdom Anteiku. Touka could vividly remember a woman and her only child running into the kingdom with emaciated bodies and begging for shelter from their wretched king.

She struggled to keep her breathing even as she bowed to the two kings standing in front of her.

“You asked for my presence, my king?” She called out as best as she could without her voice quivering.

“Touka,” The King said quietly. “You were there yesterday. You saw the lion, tiger and eagle attack me, did you not?”

“I did, sir.” She replied, staring straight into the king’s eye. He had a look of fear in his eye, as though if she gave the wrong answer, he would be killed on the spot.

“And how do I know if she is not lying to me?” King Yamori’s smooth voice said from behind her. Touka refused to look down as the other, more intimidating king circled around her, sizing her up.

“My servants answer to me,” The King said, a hint of anger in his voice. “I know when they are lying and when they are not. And this woman here will never lie to anybody.”

The other king sneered. “But will she lie to save her own life?”

“I will not.” Touka said before she could stop herself.

King Yamori stared at her as if she had just stabbed him. “Girl, you dare to speak to me when not permitted to? You dare speak against a king?”

Now, Touka bowed her head. She should have controlled herself. Silently, she cursed her brash attitude. She was now paying the price of having that attitude.

“King Yamori,” The man in front of her growled. “She has no wrong in this matter. She is only stating the truth about herself and what had happened yesterday. Leave this woman out of this matter.”

A firm hand landed on her shoulder. “Touka, tell King Yamori everything that you saw that day.”

Touka shut her eyes and took in a deep breath. Recalling all the bloodshed she had seen was immensely difficult, but recalling it in front of a man who could flatten her just by sitting on her was even worse.

And so, she spoke. She spoke on how she was trying to relax in the gardens when she saw the King struggling to fight against three animals. She recalled watching the King go berserk as he mercilessly slaughtered his assailants in an attempt to defend himself. Touka chose to leave out the fact that she was the one who caused the King to go insane with blood thirst by throwing some of her own blood towards him.

When she was done, she looked towards the other king and immediately wished she hadn’t.

King Yamori was glaring at her with an intensity that she didn’t think was even possibly. She could feel her knees threaten to give way upon meeting his gaze, but she held her ground and stood firmly, refusing to give him the satisfaction of scaring her. From his glare alone, it was clear to Touka that he did not intend to lose whatever argument he was having with her king, and her recalling yesterday had just made him lose the entire argument.

“Fine,” The other king growled, struggling to keep his anger in check. “I will accept this.”

The words ‘you were lucky’ had gone unspoken.

As soon as the other king left the room, Ken practically flew to Touka’s side.

“Thank you,” He whispered. “Without you being there to witness it, he would have declared war on this kingdom.”

Touka stilled. She had never wanted to witness the event occur, but she had just saved countless lives for being there. Maybe, the feeling of preventing deaths would be enough for her to shut an eye for what she had witnessed.

Ken stroked the side of her face gently. “I’m sorry. It must’ve been very pressuring to speak in front of him. I did not want for you to meet him face to face, let alone talk about such a traumatizing experience.”

The woman shook her head. “It was for the better for the kingdom.”

Ken was honestly touched. She had only been in Kingdom Goat for a few days, and was already adapting so well to it, even thinking of its citizens.

Once again, he spoke the same two words.

“Thank you.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think my chapters are slowly starting to get longer and longer. Who knows, maybe in the future my chapters can be 4K words a chapter.


	10. Fatigue

The next few days were relatively peaceful. King Yamori had left the kingdom with his remaining higher up, who was suffering from brutal injuries which included a broken arm and cracked ribs. Ken made sure that the higher up saw the crinkle in his eye as he boarded the carriage was moaning in pain.

Finally, the man was gone, but not for long. Ken knew that the annual Kings’ Meeting would be taking place in a few weeks time, and he would have to see the wretched man’s face again. Even worse, this year’s meeting was held in Kingdom Aogiri itself. He shuddered at the thought of the cold, worn down village with starving families that would throw out a limb for a morsel of bread.

Now, all that he really had to worry about for the next few weeks was his own paperwork. Sure, the amount of work was something he was used to, but he had wanted to send his higher ups on vacation for a little bit. That little amount of time they were gone meant that all the work would be forced onto him, and he knew very well that he could not finish in time if he took on all the work for himself.

He sighed as he signed the bottom of a sheet of paper. That would mean that he had to send them individually on vacation at different timings. They would still be getting vacation, but he knew that the other higher ups would feel a sense of jealousy that one of them would be going on a trip sooner than the other could go. 

After signing the last sheet of paper from a mountain of documents, he decided to lean back on his chair and take a break. He gazed at the ceiling above him, which was adorned with torches that lit up his office. He stared at the casing that prevented the torches from touching the wood in his office and burning it down, shutting his eyes painfully as he was reminded of the tragedy that took his parents’ lives.

 _Mother_ , he thought sadly.  _Are you proud of me?_

Thinking of his mother, he turned towards his bookshelf. They were filled with books that his mother wrote just for him. As he wandered towards his bookshelf, he noted that it had been years since he had last read one of them, as evident by the amount of dust that had collected on the books. He gingerly slid one out from its position and blew away the dust on the book cover.

 _The Black Goat’s Egg_ was the book he had taken out. He sighed lovingly at the cover of the book. Though it was nothing but a white cover with a few simple flowers drawn on it, it reminded him of his mother. Oh, how he longed to hear her reading to him again. It had been his favourite book, and he had always asked for her to read to him whenever he was not studying the history of the kingdom or playing with Hide.

Taking the book with him, he sat back down on his chair and began to read the carefully written words. He was too absorbed in the book to even realise that he still had more work to do. And when he finally realised how much time he had spent reading the book, it was already near evening. He also had two cups of tea sitting on his desk, both of which had gone cold from his lack of attention towards them.

He quickly downed the two cups of tea before resuming his work. He berated himself for wasting so much time on reading when he could have finished another stack of documents.

Sometimes, he seriously wondered how he managed to survive this long as a king.

Hours later, and way past midnight, did he finish three more stacks of documents and trudge to his bedroom. He removed the mask that he donned almost every hour of every day and inspected himself in the bathroom. Like he did almost every day, he grimaced at his scars. The pink flesh stuck out on his face and he desperately wished that he had some way to heal the skin. He remembered all the looks of pity and fear that the servants had given him in the first few days when he returned to the castle. It was then that he asked for a mask to hide the scars. Any mask, just one that would cover the scars. It came a week later from Kingdom Washuu, and it was unlike any mask he had seen before, but he accepted it and wore it until now.

Next, he lowered his head slightly to inspect his hair. Such a young age, and already an entire head of white. He even knew that Kingdom Anteiku’s king had not grown white hair until he was the age of fifty. And he was twenty one now.

Wasn’t the hair turning white supposed to be a long process where it would slowly start to turn white from the crown of the head? Ken was puzzled as, one day, he had woken up with a head of white hair. He remembered screaming like a banshee when he saw his reflection in the mirror, and even told Kazuichi to pinch him so he knew it was not a dream.

He removed his black wool shirt and inspected his wounds. Bite marks covered almost every part of his arms and shoulders. Deep cuts from claws decorated his chest and stomach. He was sure a small portion of flesh from the back of his neck was gone from how many times that vile higher up had dug his talons into his neck. Thank God that he was the kind to heal fast. His wounds would heal, but they would leave scars.

How would his future children—if he had any—react to his ugly scars? Would he have to forever hide his body from them? Maybe he would have to always cover up in front of them and not be able to share the baths with his children that he and his father did when he was young.

Times like these would be when he wished that his father was still alive. His father, Kishou, also had scars on his body, but Ken could never remember the words that his father had told him about his scars that made him not mind them at all.

He rubber at his face, making sure to avoid his sensitive eyes, which were fatigued from the long hours he spent staring at documents and staying up past midnight. Ken often wondered if the amount of work he did would eventually lessen the more he did it. His answer for the past few years in his position was ‘no’. The work never got lesser than the mountains he was given each day. In fact, they only seemed to grow larger and larger each year, and he could never shake off any work because of his own attitude.

After changing into his night clothes, he sat on the edge of hit bed and held his head in his hands. Though Yamori being gone reduced a lot of stress for him, he was overwhelmed by the mountains and mountains of work he still had to go through. There seemed to be no form of stress relief for him, because any form of stress reliever took time. Precious time that he could have used for his ever growing piles of work.

In his heart, Ken knew that he loved his parents dearly, but some small part of him couldn’t help but despise them. They had left a small, inexperienced child in charge of work that was meant for King’s that were adults. For the first three years of his reign, Ken had no idea what he was supposed to do. To make it worse, none of his higher ups had a single clue on what he was supposed to do either. None of them knew the duties of a king, and couldn’t help him in any way. 

Why? Why had his father urged him to run when he could have ran as well? Why did his father remain in the burning castle? His mother had already been crushed by the burning debris, and there was no other reason for Kishou to turn back. So, why? Why did he stay?

These were questions Ken had struggled with ever since he was a child. He had came up with some silly and downright stupid conclusions of his own; like his parents didn’t love him anymore and would rather die than take care of him. Or that his father had somehow became insane and thought that Eto was still alive and ran back to get her. As an adult, Ken knew that his parents loved and cherished him deeply, and would never leave him on his own if they could. He checked his father’s medical history; there were no signs of mental illness stated anywhere in the small stack of papers.

He shook his head, clearing all thoughts as he pushed away the bed covers and hopped in bed and buried his face the in pillows. He was distinctly reminded of Touka when he breathed in her faint scent on his pillows.

* * *

Touka cursed. It was raining.

Servants in the castle were not provided with meals, so they had to go buy ingredients with their pay to make their own meals in the castle. With the amount of silver coins she had earned in a week, she decided to buy some ingredients for stew, because she was seriously getting sick of bread and jam.

Before leaving the castle, she had made sure that there was still beef stock and spices left in the kitchen and that she would be able to use them for herself. She had bought braising beef, onions, parsley and bread to go with the stew. The meat had cost her a large portion of her coins.

She was just about to return to the castle when the clouds above her darkened and thunder clapped around her. Touka had made a run for it, but it was not enough as she was only halfway to the castle when it started pouring. And it didn’t look like it would end soon.

Rainy days were never happy days for her. Her mother disappeared from her life on a stormy night, her father had gone missing during the raining season while on a personal mission to avenge his late wife, and her brother had left her when she was waiting for him on a rainy night. But, it was good reason to make stew. It was her mother’s recipe and she had adored it ever since she was a child. Eating the stew reminded her of her family and happy times when her parents were still alive and well.

Touka took a deep breath before dashing out from the shelter that a small overhang roof had supplied. To hell if she got soaked, she would be changing out from her outdoor clothing when she reached the castle anyways, and could wash them after eating.

As expected, her entire body was almost soaked with water by the time she reached the castle. She quickly set her ingredients on the kitchen counter, ran to the servants’ quarters to grab her uniform and towel, then hopped into the shower station. 

The shower station was a strange yet unique one. A barrel had been fitted almost completely into the wall. It was filled with warm water and a small hole fitted with a plug was present on the barrel. One only had to pull out the plug and allow the water to fall on them in order to shower. They had to refill the barrels with water after using. Touka decided to do that after she finished eating, for she was starving.

After drying her hair and body and leaving the towel hanging to dry, she went back to the kitchen, where a few of the servants had gathered to make their own meals. The good thing about staying in the castle was the abundance of pots and pans in the kitchen in the event of large events such as banquets and parties hosted in the castle, so there was no short of cooking ware in the kitchen.

She grabbed a knife and began cutting her beef into small, bite sized chunks, then grabbed a pan and poured a small portion of oil into it before placing it over the fiery stove. She threw in the small beef chunks to brown slightly in the oil.

”What are you making?” Hinami asked, popping over to her side.

”Stew,” she answered. “My mother used to make it for me when I was a child.”

”Anything I can do to help?” The younger girl asked.

Touka smiled, not taking her eyes off the browning beef. “Yes, can you help me get the spices I need?”

”What do you need?”

”Cinnamon, mace, ground cloves and peppercorns.”

Hinami was off in an instant, shuffling through the many shelves and drawers in search of the spices needed for the stew.

When Touka was certain that the beef was almost done cooking, she reached for a small pot, then dumped the beef chunks into the pot before replacing the pan with the pot on the stove.

Hinami was back with a small amount of the spices, and Touka reached for a small pinch of each of the spices and sprinkled it into the pot, allowing the fragrance to fill the kitchen as it roasted slightly in the pot. Working quickly, she chopped the onion finely before adding it to the beef, then reached for the beef stock and added a small splash of it into the pot.

Using a wooden spoon, she stirred the mixture. The onions had to soften before she could add the remainder of the stock to the pot, so she stirred the mixture constantly, scrapping the bottom of it as she did to remove the crusty layer that would appear after cooking for a while. After the onions had softened and browned slightly, she poured in the rest of the beef stock and covered it with the lid, allowing it to simmer for some time.

The stew needed time to cook fully, so she decided to spend some time doing something else. When she glanced at the pocket watch (given to her by Sir Shuu, because all servants with duties to the higher ups had to be on time) she realised that it was almost time for the tea to be served to the higher ups. 

Working quickly, she set water to boil and searched for the box that contained tea leaves. It was always in the third drawer from the stove closest to the kitchen door.

She placed the appropriate amount of tea leaves for each individual higher up in their respective cups and waited for the water to boil. When it did, she poured it into the cups and waited for the tea leaves to infuse into the water slightly before placing them on a tray and bringing them up to the higher ups’ and King’s office. By the time she had traversed the distance to the offices, the leaves will have infused fully into the water.

As usual, the King was the first to be served.

When she entered his office, he was staring in her direction, as if she were some strange creature that had wandered into his office. She could hear him giving sharp inhales as she edged closer to him to place the cup of tea on his desk.

”It smells nice.” He remarked with a hazy expression in his eye. Touka knew he wasn’t referring to the tea.

Touka blinked. “I’m surprised you could even smell from here. The kitchen is so far away from your office.”

The King shook his head. “The stew.”

Now her mind came to a halt. “You can pick out different smells?”

”Of course,” He said. “Wolves have expert noses that can pick out many different scents from anywhere. We can track people easily unless they mask their scent.”

She listened as he took in another breath.

”If I remember correctly, the stew takes about half an hour to cook properly?”

Touka raised her eyebrows as she held the tray firmly with her two hands near her lap. “You remember that?”

His eye crinkled. “Why wouldn’t I? Your family made it many times during my stay with you.”

”You ate it many times, too.” She pointed out.

The atmosphere in the room was a comfortable one. It was the same feeling that Touka felt each time she cuddled up next to the King in wolf form, both then and now.

”I hope you don’t mind if I ask for a bowl of stew?” The King said softly while looking down at his lap. “It’s been so long since I last ate it. The castle stew just doesn’t taste the same.”

Touka smiled at him. “Of course.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually went on the internet to search for the stew recipe. Didn’t regret it.
> 
> And I hope you guys are ready to scream at me, because this fic has a 90% chance of being a slow burn fic.


	11. Desire

_If Hide goes for vacation for a week after Shuu, I will have five more stacks of papers to look through,_ Ken thought.  _If given to the other higher ups, they will each have one more stack of papers to look through._

There really was no way out of this. Even if he wanted to give his higher ups a break from all the work they’ve been doing, sending just one of them would result in all the others, including himself, having more work to do.

Why did he have so many papers in the first place? Was it because of how kind he was? Hundreds of papers from citizens  asking permission from even the silliest things like if they could go out from the kingdom were included in the papers.

Ken slumped back on his seat. He had made the stupid mistake of telling citizens to ask him for permission for these little, trivial things when he was a child because he didn’t know any better. Where was he now? Sifting through papers that are a complete waste of his time.

Making his decision, he stood up and walked over towards the ropes, his feet treading tiredly against the carpeted floor. He pulled the rope connected to Kazuichi’s room.

Since Shuu wouldn’t be back for another few days, he had to call on Kazuichi instead.

The bulky man was knocking on his office door within seconds.

”Come in.” Ken said.

“Your orders, my king?” Came Kazuichi’s instant polite call.

The King nodded. “Announce to the public that asking permission to go out of the kingdom, opening new stalls, buying a new house, and all the trivial subjects will no longer require them to send an official document to the castle. Only very serious matters are to be reported to the king. Any documents that are trivial which still here and future documents that are sent in will be burnt upon reading.”

Kazuichi brought a fist towards his heart. “As you wish.”

Ken stared at the many stacks of papers in his room. There were twelve stacks in total, and _nine_ of them were useless papers asking for permission from the strangest things. He should have cut this out a long time ago, especially when Kingdom Anteiku’s citizens moved in.

Now, he and his higher ups would have lesser work to do on a daily basis. As for the papers...

He could always use them as tinder for the fireplace in his room during the winter.

* * *

After finally dragging the nine stacks of useless papers to one side of his office, he got back to work. He was really shocked at how little work he was left with upon getting rid of all those papers. The remaining three stacks of papers he had to work with would only take him a maximum of five hours to complete. Much less time than what he used to work with when he had to painstakingly read every single document. He still cringed when he thought of the illegible handwriting that practically scribbled across majority of the papers.

How his father managed to do this on his own and still have time to play with him, he had no idea.

Ken let out a content sigh. At least now, if he were to have children, he would be able to spend time with them like his own father did. The thought of being a father who denied his children love because of work just didn’t sit well with him at all. Families should be whole, and both parents should be present to raise the child in a fun yet disciplined manner.

He set down his quill. Kings like himself were to have a consort or harem to ensure an heir to the throne in future years to come. Generally, the kings would have married or have multiple concubines at his age. King Yoshimura of Kingdom Anteiku begat Eto Yoshimura, his mother who refused to take the throne and had a bad relationship with her Father (Apparently, the next in line would be a higher up). King Yamori of Kingdom Aogiri had sired many children, the weak males or females he did not care for, and left them out to die if he deemed them unsuitable for the throne in his passing. King Amon from Kingdom CCG already married Queen Akira. Kingdom Washuu...

He shuddered. Kingdom Washuu’s higher ups and king were products of incest. Their children were products of incest, too. He understood the fact that the kingdom was very upfront with keeping their bloodline ‘pure’, but they mistreated their women by having them be sexual slaves to the higher ups. He remembered the sleepless nights he had to endure at every Kings’ Meeting from the disturbing screams and disgusting moans he heard throughout the night. Women should never be treated as sexual objects, in his own opinion.

It came down to him. Every other king has an heir or had already married. He was the only one left that did not have a consort, nor a harem, nor a child to take his place when he grew old and wrinkly.

During the important meetings, he felt left out. He was at the prime age for marriage, and yet he did not have a wife, while the other kings do.

He hated the idea of choosing a consort. Being forced into marriage with someone he did not love was already bad enough for him. But he knew it was worse for the woman; they would forever be stripped of their freedom and would be forced to bear children for a man they did not love. It was painful to see that some women had to endure pregnancies just because they were married to the king.

Ken didn’t want that. He had already made it clear that he would only marry a woman he loved and who loved him back in return. This sprouted from seeing his parents’ relationship, where both of them loved each other and himself dearly.

When it came to marriage however, only Touka would come to mind. He loved her dearly and would have no problems whatsoever in marrying her and would be overjoyed if she was pregnant with his child. The only problem would be the eyes of outsiders; for a king to marry someone of low social standing would be shameful to him and his kingdom. While marrying Touka would bring him a lifetime’s worth of happiness, it would also bring eternal shame to the kingdom that he and his father had worked so hard for.

An angry thought popped into his head. Children from Kingdom Washuu were born from siblings and sexual slaves, none of the kings had ever married and had only relied on a harem to produce heirs to the throne. Why was marrying a woman from low social standing supposedly worse than not marrying at all?

He didn’t understand the laws of this world. Not one bit.

* * *

Knitting was an enjoyable task, Touka found as she moved her fingers that held the two wooden sticks. The soft yarn between her fingers felt comfortable, and the quiet clicks the two sticks made lulled her into a sense of peace.

She had observed Hinami knitting something of her own and asked the younger woman to teach her. Apparently, she had a knack for it, as she was able to master it within an hour of Hinami teaching her. 

Touka found that knitting scarves were easy, as she fiddled around with the yarn and sticks in her hands. It was easy to do while she stared out the window and pondered about the most random things.

Currently she was sitting in the servants’ quarters, on her bed and looking out the window. It was facing the gardens, so she had a clear view of it and the forest beyond the moat. Unfortunately, she couldn’t see the top of the forest, as the servants’ quarters were located at the first level of the castle. She knew what was inside the forest though; wild animals like deer and owls and squirrels were always in there.

She stared at the half finished scarf in her hands. Perhaps, in the future, she would be able to knit clothes for her children. She enjoyed the clothes that her own mother had knitted for her when she was a child; they were always so soft and comfortable.

Though now, she couldn’t really see herself as a mother. She loved children and always enjoyed being around them, but having children of her own just seemed... unnatural. Touka knew that she would love her own children, but she just couldn’t see herself as a mother. Would she be a strict or gentle mother? Who would even be the father?

The King came to mind and she immediately blanched. Yes, she loved him deeply, but she wasn’t sure if it was platonic or romantic. For the king, his feelings for her were obviously romantic, from how he treated her and the affection for her. 

She shook her head. As if it would happen. He was a king, and she was a lowly servant. God knows what shame she’ll bring to this kingdom if she were to bear his child. She would not engage in any romantic activity with him whatsoever.

But, why do the words feel fake?

* * *

After years of trying to sleep in his office, Ken had grown sensitive to any noise coming from the outside of the door. Any footsteps would instantly snap him out of his drowsiness no matter how soundly he slept and he would frantically make himself appear as if he had been doing work the whole time when really, he was taking a nap.

Today was the first time he was napping in his office and Touka was the one he heard coming. Her footsteps were much quieter than his other higher ups’, and her distinct scent was one he could identify anywhere no matter how far away.

There was no harm if she came in and saw him napping. She would probably think he was too tired and needed to energise himself, then leave his usual cup of tea on the table.

So, he shut his eyes again and tried to lull himself back to sleep. With her comforting presence in the room, it wasn’t long before he felt the early hints of sleep starting to take over his mind.

He almost flinched when he felt her soft hand brush his hair away from his forehead. Her hand was soft and smooth, just like how it was during their childhood. He enjoyed her touch greatly, and was almost about to snuggle in deeper to her hand when he felt a small warmth on the top of his head.

Her lips.

She was pressing her lips on his forehead ever so gently before he heard the small ‘thunk’ that was from his tea cup being set onto the table.

He didn’t move until he heard the door shut again and the footsteps getting further and further away from his office.

When he did move, the first thing he did was touch the small spot where her lips had touched. It felt like a small fire had been ignited there and couldn’t be put out. The fire then felt like it was travelling down his face, then into his heart.

Suddenly, Ken felt something stir in his heart, like an untameable beast that raged within its confines.

He wanted more.


	12. Memories

Nothing worked. Nothing worked to calm the swirling torpedo of emotions he felt inside of him. A cold shower wouldn’t put out the passionate flames in his chest. A cup of tea wouldn’t soothe the rage in his heart. Laying in the the gardens wouldn’t calm the excitement in his body. Nothing worked.

He tried to distract himself by immersing himself in work. It would only work for so long until she came in to serve him tea again. After that, his work would be abandoned, and his mind would become a violent whirlpool once again. It was the first time in his life that he could barely keep his emotions in check. Every time he saw her, he had the maddening desire to push her up against the wall of his office and see if her lips were really as soft as they looked.

He wanted. Oh, he wanted so badly.

It took every ounce of his control to keep himself in check each time he saw her. Whether that was a good thing or not, he didn’t know.

Even now, he was forcing himself to stare at the blank sheet of paper sitting in front of him as Touka entered his office. His emotions were screaming at him to  _move_ , like it could be his last chance to ever see or touch her. He knew that he would see her every day, but his body seemed to think otherwise. Ken was resisting his body’s urge to move, and he hated that feeling. He hated that he had almost no control of his body at the current moment.

”My King?” She spoke softly.

He had to use all the weight he could to suppress his body from moving at all as he craned his neck to look at her. His own voice was strained as he spoke, “Yes?”

Touka stared at him, her eyes filled with worry at he sound of his voice. “Did you not hear me?”

Ken cleared his throat as he adjusted his position. “I’m sorry. What were you saying?”

She huffed, “Your papers are flying off the table.” 

At her words, he snapped his head to his table, then around his room. Sure enough, a portion of his papers were flying around his office from he wind coming through his window.

He frantically grabbed the paper closest to him, which was threatening to fly out the window. He stood up in a rush and bent down to pick up he fallen papers as Touka shut the window.

How embarrassing. 

“Sorry,” He repeated, slightly flustered. “It was very rude of me.

Touka flashed him a warm smile, and his heart melted into a puddle of warmth.

”Don’t be, you were always like this when you were younger,” she recalled. “Always staring off into space and not noticing anything until we alerted you.”

Oh, definitely. He did do that a lot. He remembered staring at a maple leaf on the floor once for god knows how long until Touka shook him to get his attention so they could continue playing.

For the briefest moments, the insane whirlpool of emotions stored in him calmed. The thought of their childhood was enough to set it aside. For a moment, only. When he had snapped out from his memories and looked towards her, the whirlpool started again, and he had to practically chain himself up once again.

What was this woman doing to him? She was just standing there, smiling at him, and he was going insane the longer he looked at her.

The idiotic part of him deduced that she was a witch playing with his emotions while standing there and seemingly doing nothing. The smart part countered that he was in love with her. He had to agree with the smart part.

He was snapped out from his thoughts when she asked him an unexpected question.

”It’s strange, I’ve known you when we were children, yet I don’t know your name,” she said. 

Ken stilled for a moment. It had been so long since he had revealed his name to someone that he had almost forgotten about his own name. 

His heart started racing. He was nervous. But, for what? It was only a name, just a simple one syllable word that he could speak out at any time. So, why was he so nervous and panicked? Was it because he didn’t trust her? No. He trusted her completely. 

“The servants, even the older generation, told me that not many know your actual name,” Touka went on. “Is there a reason why?”

Ken rearranged the papers on his desk as he thought of an answer. It would have to be the truth and the truth alone.

”Not particularly,” He said quietly. “It started because I was a shy child while growing up. Then, after assuming the position as King, everyone came to call me by my position as the simple term of ‘king’, or ‘my king’. Nobody asked for my name, and I didn’t give one. Eventually, I was known as the Nameless King and it stuck until now.”

Touka frowned. “Then, why did you not mention your name?”

”What was the point?” He replied as he sat down on his chair again, his inner turmoil seemingly gone.“Everyone in the castle would still only refer to me as ‘king’ and nothing more.”

”And the other kings?”

He almost snorted. “They don’t care much for honorifics. Most of them will refer to you by your name, and as the youngest king, my name would be spoken in the rudest way possible by some of the more manevolent kings. I’d prefer to just be called ‘Nameless’ because they wouldn’t be tarnishing the name my parents gave me.”

She nodded her head slowly, but her expression seemed to show that what he said was the most idiotic thing in the world to her.

”Will you tell me your name?” She asked out of nowhere.

He stared at her, his one visible eye showing enough expression to look as if she had just danced on his parents’ graves. Why would she even...?

”Is there a reason?” He asked, his tone coming off a little ruder than what he was hoping for.

Touka chuckled softly and shook her head. “When we were young, I referred to you as ‘Puppy’, and when I call you ‘king’, you seem uncomfortable with it. So, I thought that if you told me your name, it would make you feel more comfortable.”

His stomach flipped and his heart began to thud loudly. A strange mixture of nervousness and excitement filled his chest. He was so sure that she could hear his rapidly beating heart. Behind his mask, he opened and closed his mouth. It was only his name, so why was he getting so nervous?

He took a deep breath and looked down. “Ken. My... My name is Ken.”

Ken wasn’t expecting her to start giggling. He looked up at her in shock, feeling his heart flip again when he saw her clasping a hand to her mouth to control her giggles. “What’s so funny?” He demanded.

”Oh nothing,” She said in between giggles. “‘To sharpen’ is the meaning of your name, no? I just think of you sharpening your fangs on a random boulder.”

He had to admit. It would be an amusing sight to see. He would just look like a giant rat gnawing on rocks.

”Very funny,” He grumbled afterwards.

”I’m sorry,” She laughed. “Sorry.”

Her giggles subsided after a moment, to Ken’s dismay. Her laughter was like music to his ears, finer than any choir or orchestra he had been to. It was the kind of sound he would have no problem listening to for the rest of his life.

She had a strange look in her eyes as she looked at Ken again afterwards, a mixture of surprise and confusion. For a moment, he wondered if his mask was on the wrong way, but his thought was quickly ignored after she spoke, “I think I’ll take my leave now.”

He felt a sense of loss weigh down on his heart. He didn’t want her to leave yet, he wanted to spend more time with her, get to know what had happened over the last fifteen years when he wasn’t there to see her grow up into the fine woman she was now.

”Are you in the rush?” His words tumbled out from his mouth.

She shot him a questioning glance over her shoulder before turning fully to face him. “No. Why?”

_Me and my big mouth,_ He thought in his head with a tinge of bitterness. Oh, well. The words were already out and he could do nothing anymore, he might as well go ahead with his next few words, “Why not stay here and have a chat?”

Thankfully, she seemed interested in this, as she edged closer to him. “What do you want to talk about?”

“The past fifteen years,” He said with a small smile. “We only knew each other as children, and we don’t know anything that happened to one another for the last fifteen years. I’d like to know you better.”

She smiled, and his heart gave a great flip once again. 

“Sure.”

* * *

His work was left forgotten on his desk.

Both he and Touka were sitting on the floor, laughing about old times and talking about how their lives had changed over the years. They had chatted for hours, and they were still going.

”Ayato, my brother if you don’t remember him,” She said with some bitterness. “Not too many years ago, he left the family.”

The mood in his office had grown slightly solemn. Ken frowned, “Why?”

Her smile had no happiness as she spoke her next few words. “He never told me why. I just woke up one day and found his belongings all gone along with him.”

Her eyes were on the floor now, she had a glassy look in her eyes, as if recalling the painful memory of finding her brother missing when she had woken up, not being told where he was going and sick with worry and grief stricken from his sudden departure. Ken knew that she blamed herself in some way; perhaps she thought that she wasn’t a good enough of an older sister to him, or that she had done something to enrage him so much that he had abandoned her.

”It wasn’t your fault.” He said quietly, reaching over to grasp her smaller hand in his.

”I know,” She said, her voice barely above a whisper. She didn’t even sound certain that it wasn’t her fault.

The mood was heading into a depressive area. And fast. Ken knew he had to do something before her sadness would envelope her completely. He had seen it once when her father mourned over his late wife, and Touka refused to do anything for three full days.

His hand moved to grasp her wrist, and he tugged lightly, his strength allowing him to easily pull her frail body into his arms. His heart began pounding when he felt her hands fist in his shirt and her head bury into his shoulder.

Holding her made him realise just how small she was compared to him. The lack of food in Kingdom Anteiku had really done a number on her health. There was still flesh on her, just little to the point Ken wondered how she was still alive, as all the women that originated from his kingdom had more plump and healthier looking bodies.

They stayed like that for a while. Just him holding her in his arms like a precious piece of treasure that he would never let go of. He nuzzled the side of his head into her, a display of affection he showed her when they were children.

He rubbed her back soothingly, tracing small patterns on her back as he did. She drew a shuddering breath before pulling away from him with a sad smile on her face. He frowned at the loss of her body against his, but said nothing.

”Thank you,” She said truthfully. “I feel better now.”

He managed a smile at her through his mask.

“Anytime if you need to talk about something, I’m here for you. I’ll always be here for you.”

She smiled at him again before taking her leave.


	13. Unmasked

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy.

In the next few weeks or so, Ken saw significant improvement between his relationship with Touka. 

The young woman had visited his office every day, and it wasn’t just to serve him his tea. She would chatter about her day and some parts of the last fifteen years and he would listen, and listen, and listen.

Currently, he decided that his favourite time of the day would be whenever she came to his office to chat with him. It was so easy to drown in her voice, and he allowed himself to do so. Her voice was like a calming lullaby to him.

Sometimes, the topic would be about what the other enjoyed eating. Sometimes it would be about their favourite season and why. Other times, it could just be about something completely random. Either way, he enjoyed it.

However, with each passing day his want for her only increased. With each time she visited his office, the need to kiss her only grew. She was like a fan, and he was the fire that she fanned.

Often, he found himself daydreaming of Touka. She was all that was on his mind nowadays, and he didn’t mind at all. 

The more she visited, the more the atmosphere changed from friendly one to a more intimate one.

Since she visited him everyday, his control over himself was rapidly depleting.

”Ken,” she called.

His stomach flipped when she called him by his actual name. “Yes?” He managed to get out without making himself sound like an idiot.

”Why... Why do you wear your mask?”

The question had almost toppled him over, like when she had asked him for his name. It was completely unexpected (to him) and sent his heart racing in a fit of nervousness once again while a disgusted feeling towards himself rose in the pits of his stomach.

He cleared his throat uncomfortably and looked away from her. “You should know.”

 _You’re disgusting,_ a part of him hissed gleefully.  _You think she can tolerate those scars of yours? You look like a monster from a freak accident. She will never love you. Give up._

He struggled to fight against the taunting voice in his head. It was the manifestation of all the anger, frustration and guilt he had over his parents’ death; where they had died, while he had survived with a few scars. He hated that part of himself. The side of him that never let go of the tragedy, and used it to plague him with guilt and shatter his self confidence.

It hid itself normally, but it would wake when someone asked about his mask and why he wore it, or even stir just from someone glancing at it. The more he tried to fight against his conflicting emotions, the more he felt like he was losing the battle.

”Your burn marks, right?” She said softly, her voice dragged him out from his negative emotions. “You never hid them from me when you were a wolf, why hide it now?”

In an instant, he was immersed in his guilt again. “You won’t like it.”

While drowning in his emotions, he hadn’t realised that Touka had crawled towards him until he felt her hands on his face, forcing him to turn towards her. 

They were so close. One motion of untying the string on the section of the mask that concealed his mouth, and he would be able to feel her lips on his own. Just one motion. But he didn’t take the chance, because he wanted to know what she would do.

She was staring at him with curiousity in her eyes, and she looked as if she was analysing every detail of his mask, from the eyepatch to the tiny little scratches that had accumulated over the years.

His mind flew into panic mode when he felt her reach behind his head and begin to undo the string that held his mask to his face. In an instant, his hand was grasping her wrist firmly as his eyes looked at her with a wild, warning look.

Touka could tell that he was scared. He was scared because he thought that his ‘ugly’ scars would make her reject him. Personally, she felt offended. She had spent so much time with him as children and now, and he thought that she would reject him?

”Don’t,” she whispered. “Don’t reject it.”

Removing his mask was a great deal to him, Touka could tell from the slight growl that replied through his throat, like he was trying to protect his face.

“You never hid it when we were children,” she reminded. “You never hid it on that day.”

His eyes softened somewhat. She could tell that he was recalling the memories from their childhood and from the day she had found him in the gardens. Now, he seemed conflicted. Whether to let her see his face or not.

His grip on her loosened, and Touka knew that she could undo his mask.

Her fingers reached for the knot behind his head and tugged on the string gently. It folded itself and the mask slumped slightly against Ken’s face. 

He shut his eyes, like he was afraid of what was to come next. Touka undid the strings that tied his eyepatch to his face next, which fluttered to the floor and revealed the pink flesh around his eye. She gingerly pressed her fingers against the scars around his eye as she pulled the mask off his face.

The right side of his face was covered in the pink flesh. A small spot was on his nose and a few cut scars on his lips. His lips were pressed into a thin line and his brows had scrunched up, an obvious sign that he was struggling to keep his emotions in check.

”Look at me,” she whispered, gently cupping his face with her small hands.

Ken shook his head, his face scrunching up even more.

”Why?”

”I’m disgusting,” He murmured with a strained voice. “I don’t want to see the look in your eyes.”

She patted his face firmly. “Was I ever disgusted when I saw you when we were children? Was I disgusted when I saw you on that day? Tell me, did I look like I was repulsed by your scars?”

Ken shook his head, seemingly with reluctance.

”Then, why would I be disgusted now?”

Her fingers traced his scars ever so gently, almost like a warm invitation for him to open his eyes. Her touch was so warm, so loving that he wondered how he could ever think that she would find him repulsive. 

“You’re beautiful,” she murmured, bringing his head down so that their foreheads met. “You are not disgusting. You’re beautiful.”

”How can you say that?” He whispered, pressing his head closer to hers. Oh, how he loved her skin on his. “How can you say that I am beautiful?”

Her next words were so soft that Ken had to strain his ears to hear her properly. 

”Because, you just are.” She murmured. “You are beautiful, and I love you.”

Time stilled. His breathing hitched and he struggled to maintain his composure. He had to make sure that he didn’t hear the words wrongly. He had to make sure that this wasn’t a wonderful dream that he would wake up from and realise it had all been an illusion his mind had made.

”Repeat it again,” He said.

She did so without hesitation. “You are beautiful, and I love you.”

The words felt like he had taken a cannonball to the stomach, and the impact forced his eyes open and he finally looked into her eyes. Just the raw emotion in her eyes sent a tight feeling through his stomach and his heart going a million beats per second. Her eyes were so loving and so warm. So inviting.

At this point, he could no longer hold himself back. He crashed his lips against hers in an almost desperate manner, like she was the last line to life he had left. Her lips were incredibly soft and sweet and he found himself craving more and more.

When a small portion of his senses finally came back to him after a few seconds, he hurriedly realised that he had not asked for her consent for this and almost reluctantly pried his lips off of hers.

Almost. Because her arms had snaked around his neck and pulled him closer to her.

They broke the kiss for a brief moment to breathe, and Ken took the opportunity to wrap an arm around her waist while the other pressed against the back of her head, bringing her closer to him.

He hadn’t even notice that Hide had knocked on the door, opened it, and slowly and awkwardly slid out as if he had seen nothing. Touka didn’t notice him either.

To him, this moment was perfect. He wouldn’t give anything in the world for a moment more perfect than this. Just the feel of her soft lips on his made the world seem _right._

His fingers ran through her soft locks slowly and tightened his hold on her body. He didn’t want to let her go. Never wanted to let her go.

“I won’t reject you,” Touka murmured, planting a small kiss on his nose. “Ever.”


	14. Leaving

As much as Ken wanted to enjoy his moments on cloud nine with Touka, he couldn’t. The annual Kings’ Meeting was scheduled soon, and it was to be held in Kingdom Aogiri this year. Ken shuddered at the thought of being in Kingdom Aogiri. It wasn’t that he hated the place (he only hated its king) but he couldn’t help the gnawing feeling of pity for its citizens each time he went.  
  
Almost all of Kingdom Aogiri’s citizens were malnourished; skinny and emaciated they were due to the high taxes that Yamori had imposed on them which left them with almost no food for themselves. Money to purchase food was out of the question too, as Yamori would take all of it to provide luxuries to his guests and himself.  
  
All kings were allowed to bring as many servants as they pleased to the meetings. He would be bringing his higher ups, a few servants and Touka, of course. However, he was worried for Touka. He knew that the servants would be allowed to sleep in separate rooms unless the king had questionable activities to do with them. He also knew that the servants would be going through the daily routines of what the other servants in the other castle would be doing.  
  
His stomach lurched. It meant that Touka would be in the kitchen at times, and he knew as a fact that the animals were slaughtered in the kitchen in a very inhuman way, meaning she would have to experience what he had seen as a child. He swallowed the rising bile as he remembered the wails of the calves as they struggled to breathe through their sliced throats, left to slowly die on the kitchen floor as they bled out.  
  
He only had about a week left before he had to depart for Kingdom Aogiri. He needed to give word to his servants about it.  
  
Five, including Touka, would be coming in total. He told the first four individually and told them to be waiting outside the castle gates first thing in the morning a week from today.  
  
He would tell Touka when she came into his office.  
  
He was on his final few sheets of documents when he heard footsteps. He already knew whoever it was wasn’t Touka. Their steps were heavier and wider. A male. When their scent made its way into his nose, he identified the person as Hide.  
  
”Come in,” He drawled before Hide had even knocked on the door.  
  
When the other man had slid into his room with waggling eyebrows, he already knew what he would be asking.  
  
”Let me guess,” Ken said amusedly as he set his quill down on the table. “You saw what happened that day.”  
  
”And you are so correct, my king.” The blonde man chirped as he pressed a fist against his chest firmly, puffing it out like a child. “I saw it.”  
  
A small amount of heat rose up to his face, and Ken was happy he had the mask on for the first time in his life. “And?” He said evenly. “Is my romantic relationship with a woman any concern of yours?”  
  
”Of course it is!” Hide exclaimed. “It’s my job to monitor my dearest king in whatever situation he is in. Even if they are romantic relationships.”  
  
Ken snorted. “Alright, enough with the jokes. What are you really here for?”  
  
Hide’s posture straightened and his face morphed into a more serious expression. “It is about the beating Kings’ Meeting.”  
  
The King clasped his hands together. “Are you here to voice your concerns?  
  
The other man nodded his head. “King Yamori was there to witness you slaughtering his higher ups from the window of his room. He saw your intimate gesture towards your woman.”  
  
Ken instantly knew what that meant. There would be a chance that Yamori would target Touka to emotionally harm him.  
  
He weighed his options, and neither of them were very good options. He could choose to leave her in the castle while he went to the meeting, but the chances of Yamori sending for someone to the castle while the meeting was taking place was high. He knew that Kingdom Aogiri had skilled warriors that could end a person’s life without spilling a single drop of blood, so leaving her alone wasn’t the best option.  
  
However, bringing her along wouldn’t be a very good choice either. Yamori could target her himself, and he might not be there to protect her if that happened.  
  
“What do you suggest I do?” Ken asked slowly. “Leaving her here could result in multiple lives being taken. Bringing her can increase her chances of death.”  
  
Hide shook his head. “It is up to you, my king. I would recommend bringing her along; you will have a better way to protect her.”  
  
He wouldn’t bring this up when he told Touka that he would be bringing her along. It would only scare her and give her more unneeded anxiety during her time there.  
  
“Is that all?” He asked. “You may leave if that is all you have to report to me.”  
  
The other man exited the room.

* * *

He was a king, for god’s sake. He was a man of great power who could silence crowds with his mere presence. He was a man whose wise words could elicit loud and joyful cheers from his people. He was a man who was feared by many from the other kingdoms.  
  
So, why was he so nervous when it came to talking to Touka?  
  
She was just a woman. He had no problems speaking to women, yet he had trouble speaking to her. His voice would get stuck in his throat, his palms would grow sweaty and he would fidget.  
  
Really, just being in her presence made him feel like a child again. When talking was an absolute chore to do and he would trip clumsily over something.  
  
His heart was sent into a flurry of nervousness when the faint scent of tea filled his nostril. His keen ears perked slightly when he heard the soft footsteps pattering down the hallway. Right before she knocked on his door he drew a deep breath to steady his nerves.  
  
”Come in,” He said, hoping the nervousness in his voice wasn’t as obvious as it sounded to him.  
  
Touka came in, a bright smile on her face as usual when she served him his tea.  
  
“Touka,” he managed. “I need to talk to you about the upcoming Kings’ Meeting.”

A single eyebrow arched and she stared at him with a quizzical look. “Go on.”

Seriously, it was only a small sentence. He could do this.

”You’ll have to come with me to Kingdom Aogiri. You are one of five... servants that are accompanying me along with the higher ups.” He struggled with the word ‘servants’. Touka was so much more than that.

He wasn’t blind to the grimace that fell upon her face. He couldn’t blame her, the words ‘Kingdom Aogiri’ would put a bad taste in anyone’s mouth. Everyone knew how corrupt and disgusting the kingdom was, and Touka was no exception to this.

”Alright...” She said slowly. 

Her grimace morphed into sudden shock as if she had just been slapped. Her mouth gasped open like a fish while her eyes became the size of saucers.

”What is it?” Ken asked worriedly. Her sudden shift of expression unnerved him somehow.

”Ayato,” she breathed. “He... He might be in Kingdom Aogiri. I might get to see him again!”

Ken’s head tilted slightly as he pondered who exactly Ayato was before he remembered that he was Touka’s younger brother. He never really paid too much attention each time Touka brought up another male.

He raised his eyebrows. “Perhaps you might.”

* * *

A week passed, and Ken was getting ready for the journey to Kingdom Aogiri.

If he had a choice, he wouldn’t go. He would rather let Shuu amputate his arm than go to Kingdom Aogiri. But no, such is the fate of a king.

He sat on the inside of his carriage, the musty scent from the age of it wasn’t unpleasant nor pleasant to him, but it was nostalgic. 

The maroon coloured fur that covered the seat opposite him made him retreat into his mind. That was exactly where his late parents sat when they traveled in the carriage. They would entertain him with stories of fairies and talking Cyclopes while he would listen intently. Now there was no one.

He brought his gloved hand towards his face, allowing his cheek to rest on it while his elbow rested on the arm rest. The journey would take several hours, which was tiring even though they would stop at random villages for a drink of water or for some sustenance.

The carriage shifted slightly and creaked as his and his servants’ luggages were hauled into the back compartment. His servants, including Touka, would be the ones to drive his carriage while his higher ups remained close to him on their own horses.

”Are you uncomfortable, my king?” Came Shuu’s voice from the carriage door (He had returned recently).

”I am fine,” He said while waving dismissively towards the other man. He really was not looking forward to sitting in a cramped carriage for hours.

”Please alert us if you need anything.”

Ken gave a lazy nod before turning his head in the direction of the small window next to him. It was his only source of fresh air, and possibly the one source he could have if he wanted to chat with Touka.

He almost groaned when the horses started moving. He was already frustrated with the previous servants’ driving skills, and the newer generation of servants’ weren’t any better.

 _So much for the fountain of Youth,_ he muttered to himself.

Outside the tiny window, he could see distant mountains behind his own kingdom when he poked his head out of it. Riding next to him was Irimi, who nodded to him politely before turning her head to look at the front of the road ahead.

Ken thought about the other kings. He wanted nothing to do with the prideful and hypocritical King Tsuneyoshi and definitely didn’t want to see King Yamori. With the other two kings, he was fine. King Amon was a good friend of his, and King Yoshimura was a kind hearted old man who offered him advice whenever he asked for it.

King Tsuneyoshi was a man who sired his heirs and higher ups using women borne from incest. And he wouldn’t stop until he was dead. Neither would his children. Ken gagged just by thinking about the foul and disgusting noises he would have to endure again.

When he was a child, his parents would shield him from the noise by making him giggle until he couldn’t hear anything. When they passed, he would cover his ears using as many pillows as he could without suffocating himself, an act that was becoming more and more useless as he aged. 

He was disgusted by the men, and he pitied the women. They were forbidden from speaking against their higher ups and king as doing so would result in certain death. They couldn’t even voice out their complaints even though they were going through so much. A strange sense of guilt gnawed at his heart when he thought of the chains that wrapped around the women’s necks that kept them anchored to their masters. 

Guilt, but why?

He didn’t stop to ponder why he felt guilt for women not of his concern because they had arrived at the first village where they would rest for a moment. Apparently, his thoughts had consumed him so much that his brain hadn’t processed that they had been travelling for a few hours.

”Would you like any refreshments?” Shuu asked as he opened the carriage door, allowing Ken to crawl out from the cramped space.

”Water,” He replied, feeling his throat was as dry as a tree during winter.

As he waited for his water, he looked up into the skies. It would soon be winter, which meant cold days outside and warm nights from the fire in his office and bedroom. It was also the time when his workload would decrease, and he would spend his days in his room, snug in his blankets while reading a book and enjoying some warm tea.

He wondered how Touka spent her winters. He remembered that she would play in the snow when she was younger, but that could have changed by now. After all, she was a full grown woman. Playing in the snow would just make her seem immature and childish.

Truly, he would feel disappointed if she did not enjoy frolicking in the snow anymore. It was his favourite thing to do with her when they were children. It would make the anguish and despair he felt go away and allow happiness and smiles to enter his heart again.

”Your water, my king.” Shuu said, handing him the leather pouch that was filled with water. 

Ken hummed in thanks before taking a long drink from the water bottle, feeling a sense of relief fill him when the cooling water washed away any dryness he was feeling in his throat.

From the corner of his eye, he could see the servants. One of them was kneeling down while he drank from the water bottle that was for the servants. Another two were stretching their bodies from the long journey of sitting in the same position. Touka and the last servant were patiently waiting for the water bottle to be passed to them.

The other servant who was waiting for the water bottle got to it before Touka did. Ken could see the longing in her eyes as she stared at the upside down leather pouch that was being emptied into the other servant’s mouth.

”Touka,” He called.

She turned to him, surprised that he would address her outside of their more private times together.

He beckoned her over with his hand, and she complied, wandering over until she was next to him and he towered over her.

”Drink,” He said in a demanding tone as he shoved his water bottle into her hands.

She looked at him with astonishment, confused as to why he would be letting her drink out from his water bottle.

”I’m waiting for the other one,” she  explained as she hastily tried to give the water bottle back.

”It’s empty,” Ken pointed out.

Sure enough, when she glanced back the servant was shaking the water bottle upside down and not a single drop of water came from it.

Touka sighed and shot him a wary glance before tipping the contents of the bottle into her mouth. 

Ken watched as she drank. A small droplet of water had trickled out of her mouth and down her chin. He moved his hand to wipe the droplet away, and Touka pulled away from the bottle once his thumb brushed her chin ever so gently.

He could understand why she was so jumpy. They were in public and their interactions with one another were limited to the space within his office. They had never talked to one another or displayed any sort of physical interaction outside of his office, save for a few times before that day.

”I will be going for a short walk,” Ken said to his higher ups. “I will be taking one servant with me. My higher ups and subjects, please tend to the horses and ensure they will be healthy enough for the rest of the journey.”

Before he turned to leave he nodded at Touka, signalling for her to follow him.

Once Touka was certain they were out from earshot she turned to him, “We’re in public.”

Ken’s heart skipped a beat. “And?”

”Are you not worried that they will find it about your relationship with me?” She asked as she shot him a quizzical look.

He shrugged as he wander past a few small houses. The villagers had hid in their houses, seemingly afraid of the new people that had stopped in their village. He could still see that the younger ones were peeping out the windows and ajar doors.

They walked down the road of the small village. Small houses were everywhere and the village bakery and trade centre could be seen from far away. The town was deserted from the people scurrying back into the safety of their homes.

“It’s very quiet,” Ken muttered. “Do I look scary?”

Touka stared at him, as if scrutinising him to see if he was joking or not.

”With the mask? Or without?” She asked.

”With.”

”A little. If the mask was completely black you would look like someone attempting to cover his face after he murdered someone.”

His visible eye narrowed into a slit after her words came out. “Without the mask?”

Her gaze softened slightly. “No. You don’t look scary when your mask is off. You’re beautiful.”

Ken never showed his emotions in public. He seldom smiled and refused to show anything close to an expression even when the most unexpected subjects were brought up in public. The only time when he would show them would be in privacy, only in front of people he trusted. This rule was set by his father, who always told him that a king needed to display dignity and pride even in the most intense situations. A king should only ever show his emotions in the utmost privacy.

Even Touka was not an exception to this rule of his. 

On the inside, he was on the verge of tears and he wanted nothing more than to feel her warm embrace and soft lips again. To feel her against his body was by far the most comforting thing in his life.

But, no. He wouldn’t do that unless they were in privacy. Even she could not bend the rule he had set for himself. He wanted to honor his father by following the rule he had set. A clear sign that his father was still with him.

The most he could show her now was a smile. Even then, she couldn’t see it properly due to the mask he donned. She could only see the crinkle in his eye.

That would be enough.

For now.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *frantically types this during free period* and thanks for all your comments! They really motivate me to write more!


	15. Aogiri

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to warn you guys. This chapter features horrible treatment towards livestock that are a direct reflection of how they are actually treated in real life.

Kingdom Aogiri looked worse than before, and Ken didn’t know how it happened.

The streets were filthy and caked with mud and grime. Houses were cracked and some had roofs that were ready to collapse. Worse of all; human remains littered the streets.

How could this hellhole even be considered a kingdom? The only thing in this place that was considered even slightly royal would be the castle. Even then, it’s dark colours made it look everything but grand.

He tried not to feel pity for the emaciated children that were creeping around the streets. Some of them were looking through the small cracks on the streets for anything edible. 

Really, it was just depressing. Some of the young ones were staring at them intently, not as if they were food, but as if they were contemplating whether they had any food to spare them. Their wide eyes scanned their bodies with hopeful glints.

Apparently, one of the servants did have food. And it was Touka.

Ken had forgotten that she had bought bread for the journey. And now she was offering it to the three children closest to them.

”Here,” She said gently, tearing off a small portion of the loaf of bread in her hands and offering it to the children, gently coaxing them out from the corner they hid in. “Eat.”

The longing in the children’s eyes was evident as they stared at the small piece of bread, but they were hesitant to take it, likely due to fear from the new people they had never seen before.

Touka knelt down and brought the small piece of bread closer to the children. The oldest of the three finally gave in to his hunger and snatched the piece of bread away from her hands.

What Ken was expecting was for the child to immediately stuff the morsel of food into his mouth and swallow it as soon as possible. He wasn’t expecting the child to turn around and give the slice to the youngest child.

”Come here,” Touka coaxed. “There’s more than enough bread for the three of you.”

The oldest child had taken the entire loaf of bread and ran off with the other two children, which was surprising because they were so malnourished and emaciated that their legs looked as if they would break at the slightest pressure.

Other children poked their heads out of damaged doors and cracked windows, eyeing the three with the bread that they were currently shoving into their face.

Touka frowned. She didn’t have another loaf of bread, and she wasn’t going to take her chances to buy one from this kingdom. For all she knew, the ingredients used could be from the worst possible quality.

”That’s enough,” Ken said, walking towards her and placing his hand firmly on her shoulder. “We’ll come back to give the children food later if we can.”

And she was left feeling a strange sense of guilt and pity as they made their way to the castle. She really tried her best to not look at the starving children who were all gazing at them in hopes of some amount of food to fill their empty stomachs by the slightest amount.

King Yamori was waiting for them at the entrance of the castle, a wide and smug grin on his face with a crazed look in his eyes. His higher ups stood next to him, even the one that Ken had so savagely beat up weeks ago. That higher up shot Ken a nasty glare as they approached.

“Welcome, Nameless King,” Yamori said loudly, his grin widening further and making him appear more insane looking. “Please, enjoy your stay in my humble abode for the next few days. I hope we will... correct our wrongdoings from the past.”

Ken didn’t miss the glint in the other king’s eyes when he said that. 

“Of course,” he bit out in reply. Just looking at the vile man enough to make his stomach twist uncomfortably.

Kingdom Goat’s castle was grand in a good way. Kingdom Aogiri’s castle was grand in a bad way. 

The castle was made with dark materials, ranging from the darkest oak to blackened cobblestone. The leaves hanging down from the windows were dry and dead. Windows were opaque and foggy, like they wanted to shield the terrors of the kingdom outside from the eyes on the inside. The run down kingdom’s flag was dyed a blood red, the symbol resembling a maple leaf as a pattern.

Though the castle itself was filled with jewels and many luxuries, Touka couldn’t help but feel as if she was in Hades’ underworld palace; where the god lived in a dark castle with jewels donning every bit of his palace.

For some reason, the servants from Kingdom Goat were placed in a room next to the their higher ups’. Strange, as Touka had noted that all the servants in Kingdom Aogiri slept in the basement.

A few minutes after the servants had hauled their belongings into the large room they were called by the servants from Kingdom Aogiri. Apparently, dinner was to be held right after the last king made his appearance, so they had to start working on it now.

So, they followed the servants to the kitchen, which looked better than the rest of the kingdom, save for the large black spot on the stone floor.

The servants brought in two pigs, two cows, and three chickens. 

“You are to remove the skin and unwanted fat from the animals after we... dispose of them.” One of them said.

Then, one of the cows was brought onto the dark stain on the floor, and the remaining animals were blindfolded, for some strange reason.

Touka had a gnawing feeling in her gut that told her she needed to look away  _now._ And she made the horrible, horrible mistake of not listening to that gut feeling of hers.

In Kingdom Goat, animals were knocked unconscious with the end of a handle of a knife, then killed while the animals could feel no pain. In Kingdom Aogiri, this was a very different story. 

As swift as the blink of her eyes, Touka witnessed the servant cut the poor cow’s throat with a sharp blade. Blood fished out heavily from the wound, and the animal was left writhing on the ground, mooing in pain as it frantically kicked its legs in panic, only knowing that it was dying.

Touka swallowed the rising bile in her throat. She had only witnessed the slaughter of a cow once, done by her father, but he had turned her away before she could properly see what he had to do to procure their dinner that night.

She was unable to tear her eyes off the dying cow, watching it as it stared at her, life slowly diminishing from its eyes. The look in its eyes seemed to be pleading her for help. Help that she was unable to provide.

Unbearable guilt tore at her very being when it was not supposed to. She ate livestock as food, and never thought anything of it. Until now. Watching the pathetic animal breathe it’s last breath made her want to back out from this dinner preparation.

”Don’t just stand there,” the Aogiri servant snapped. “Get to work.”

* * *

It wasn’t any better for the rest of the livestock. The second cow was slaughtered the same way. The pigs had been stabbed in their sides and left to bleed out like the cows. The chickens had their necks twisted until it snapped, then had their bodies dunked in boiling water to loosen the feathers before they were recklessly torn off the barely living bodies.

One of the servants from Kingdom Goat had bolted from the kitchen when the second pig was being slaughtered and had emptied his stomach outside.

The servants from Kingdom Aogiri stared at them with a disappointed look in their cold eyes, as if they couldn’t believe that they couldn’t handle this ‘usual treatment of animals’.

The black stain on the floor was from all the blood that had bled out from the animals. 

Afterwards, the dead animals’ blood was drained almost entirely, not fully because they said that King Yamori enjoyed his meat with some blood, like the barbarian he was.

Typically, the servants from Kingdom Goat would have no problems with skinning the animal skin and chopping it into suitable sizes for meals. However, after witnessing the brutal deaths of each of the animals, skinning and slicing their bodies felt akin to killing them a second time.

It was no different for Touka. The slimy and cold slab of meat from the cow was something she should have been used to, after making beef stew so many times. But this time she felt as if she was holding some kind of mass from god knows where.

After a grueling hour in the kitchen they were finally done with skinning and removing the unwanted fatty bits from the meats. Touka would choose to never set foot in this kitchen every again if she had the choice. The black stain was just haunting her of what she had witnessed.

And no matter how long they washed their hands they couldn’t seem to rid the smell of blood or redness from their hands. It seemed to serve as a cruel reminder that they could do nothing to help the animals as they pleaded for help, or even a blow of mercy to end their suffering.

Now, she just felt like a murderer. Someone who took a life and did nothing to ease their suffering.

Perhaps it was because she was prey at heart. A simple rabbit; common prey to foxes, coyotes, eagles... wolves. Perhaps it was for that reason that she felt so horrible for witnessing a brutal kill of another species of prey.

Her thoughts had been so consumed that she hadn’t realised that she had been mindlessly wandering around the same area for a period of time. She only realised when her movements were halted by none other than Ken himself.

”What’s wrong?” He immediately asked. “You’ve been pacing around this same spot for half an hour.”

 _Of course_ , she thought. The man was a wolf. He could track her movements through scent alone.

Lying to him wasn’t a option. Who in their right minds would pace the same area for half an hour? 

She chewed on her bottom lip and looked down as she thought of the words to correctly phrase what had witnessed. Apparently she had a look of fear on her face, because Ken said, “Did someone harm you? Who was it?”

Her head snapped up and her eyes met his. Her hands waved about frantically as she explained that no one had harmed her in any way.

Physically, that is.

His hand gripped her shoulder. “Do you want to talk in a more private environment? Anybody could walk in on us here.”

Of course anybody could. They were smack dab in the middle of the hallway now. Any noise they made would echo through the walls and across the hall in both directions and be heard by any passing servant. Or worse; King Yamori himself.

The vile man already knew that Touka was his weak spot and would likely plan to use her against him. He didn’t have to know about his romantic relationship with her either. That would just complicate the situation even further.

”Come with me,” He said quietly, moving his hand down to grab her arm and tugging her along. She followed along and they walked until they were in front of his room.

His head darted left and right, making sure that nobody saw them. Granted, he wouldn’t do anything sexual to her as that was not in his mind, however any Kingdom Aogiri servant would see it the wrong way and speak to King Yamori about Ken’s intimacy with Touka.

He gently nudged her towards the door as he opened it, allowing her to go inside.

The look on her face told him that she was baffled by the design of his room. 

It was made entirely out of a dark wood. The floor was decorated with a red carpet made of the finest silk. The corners of the room had intricate designs of the Kingdom’s flag symbol carved into it. Portraits detailing war events had gold frames surrounding them.

A fireplace was next to his bed, the embers glowing faintly within while the stone bars kept them trapped within the small space. 

The centre of the room stood his bed, a massive one made from the softest and finest wool and silk. It even had a canopy hung over it’s white material.

”What’s bothering you?” Ken immediately asked after he had shit the door behind him.

Touka sighed. “Just disgusted with this kingdom.”

His visible eye softened. “That is to be expected. This kingdom is vile and cruel to every individual not of the royal bloodline.”

”How is this even a kingdom?” Touka asked, her voice quivering when she remembered the starving children and dying livestock. “The treatment of every civillian and even animals are too cruel.”

”That is how it is,” Ken said, gently taking her hand into his. “The ruler is an evil and corrupt man and nobody dares to go against him. Leading a rebellion would be far worse; he would just have each of their heads on a wooden pole to prevent further rebels.”

He nuzzled the side of his face into the top of her head. “Animal treatment, you say? What of it?”

Touka shut her eyes, trying to shut out the fresh memory of the animals being butchered in front of her.

”You saw livestock killed while conscious and living, right?” He asked softly.

Her eyes opened and met his again, a look of understanding and empathy within his gray irises.

”I know,” He said. “I saw it too.”

Her silence was a cue for him to continue.

”I was only four years old when I saw it,” he said. “It was the first year I was in Kingdom Aogiri while my father was attending the Kings’ Meeting. I was venturing the castle and grew curious on what we would have for dinner. Since I often snuck into the kitchen back at the castle when I was a child I had naturally assumed that I could do the same here.”

”I was ready to push the door open until I heard the cries of a cow. Curious and innocent, I pushed the door open until it was ajar and looked inside. What I saw was probably the same thing you saw earlier.”

”I ran back to my mother, crying and screaming that I saw blood. Blood and the screams of animals. Even now, almost twenty years later I cannot get that image out of my head. It no longer affects me though.”

”Why?” She asked, even though she already knew the answer.

”I am a wolf,” He answered. “I have sank my fangs and claws into prey before. I have polished off my prey until nothing but their bones were left. This is natural for a predator like me.”

“I suppose,” Touka murmured, slightly disturbed that he had given her that description. Well, she had seen worse.

”If you do not want to eat the meat related dishes tonight, I’ll ask for bread and fruit to be served to you.” He said.

Her eyes widened slightly. “Are you sure you can make demands like that? I am but a servant.” 

“I am a king,” He replied simply. “Defying me is an crime worthy of beheading. Besides, I am sure that particular higher up has already spread word about my... lethal actions against him and his comrades.”

Touka nodded her head slowly, trying not to remember that gruesome day when she had witnessed the man she loved slaughter two men like they were trash. 

He cleared his throat. “On another note. Kingdom Washuu has men with comfort women. You will certainly have to hear the disturbing noises when you sleep. I just thought that I should warn you about that first.”

Touka grimaced. She really was not looking forward to that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So so sorry for the late update! School has been keeping me busy and there’s less than a month to my national exams. You guys likely won’t be seeing this fanfic update for about a few weeks.


	16. Nightmare

Honestly, Touka wished she had the privilege to request for an extra pillow to block out the disgusting noises she was hearing just across the hallway.

She hadn't seen King Tsuneyoshi nor his higher ups as servants were required to consume their dinner elsewhere in the castle. She hadn't seen them when the servants retired to their bedrooms to sleep.

But she could  _hear_ them. And it sickened her to no end.

She would have been fine if she could only hear the moans coming from a single couple. She wasn't fine, because there were  _fifteen_ couples rutting like animals in their rooms with their--ugh-- _comfort women._

She would bet all the coins she had saved now that the women were unwilling for this sexual act that had been lasting for hours. Just how much stamina did these sad excuses of men have?

With a groan, she slammed her face into her pillow, grabbing the edges with her hands and bringing them up to her ears in a desperate attempt to block out the noises.

* * *

In the end, Touka had only gotten an hour's worth of sleep. That meant that the disgusting noises continued on and on until an hour before she was set to wake up. Not a good way to start the day.

Of course, she just  _had_ to see the men step out of their room after she just left the room that she shared with the other servants.

Turns out that their comfort women weren't just comfort women. They were also their personal servants; meaning they had to start the day at the same time the other servants.

The feeling of pity that crawled up her spine was an uncomfortable one. All the women look as if they had risen from the grave. Their skin was pale and looked rubbery, and they had bags under their eyes. It was to be expected. God knows how many times a week--and for how many hours in the night--they had to be with their owners. Unable to rest, unable to recover. 

There was nothing Touka could do to help them. Even if she did by trying to get them out of their situation, she would most likely face certain death from King Tsuneyoshi himself for violating some stupid law that she didn't know about. 

It was really depressing to see the women slowly try to finish up their current tasks; making breakfast for their owners.

Thankfully, they only had to prepare their king and higher ups’ breakfasts.

She had been with a few of the other servants for long enough for them to constantly complain about how Ken always requested for the fruits on his tarts to be arranged in a specific way. She had also been with them for long enough to know what he ate for breakfast, and, quite frankly, it was rather boring.

The King's breakfast consisted of some fruit tarts, toast, a thick slab of bacon and a sunny side up on the side and the higher ups all ate the same.

Even she had a more varied breakfast in the castle. And she was a servant, for crying out loud.

While aiding her fellow servants, they all tried to ignore the comfort women in the room. It wasn’t just out of pity. No woman would want someone to look at them after hearing her make those noises.

She had just finished toasting the bread over the flames when the kitchen door suddenly burst open and a man stomped his way in.

From the looks of fear from the women from Kingdom Washuu, it was easy enough to tell that this man came from the same kingdom. And he wasn’t happy.

The man had a look of absolute rage etched into his features. His imposing figure cornered a comfort woman—likely his own—and grabbed her by the hair.

”You little whore,” he seethed so quietly that it was almost impossible to hear him. “Does it look like I enjoy waiting for you to cook my meal? Does it look like I am a patient man?”

All movements in the kitchen suddenly grew quicker in the presence of the higher up from Kingdom Washuu. Everyone was eager to finish their jobs and get out of the room as soon as possible.

”You are very lucky that we are in Kingdom Aogiri now,” The man whispered into the poor woman’s ear. “If we were back home you would have begged for mercy.” 

The man released the woman’s hair with a harsh push and stormed out the door. Nobody moved to comfort the woman. She wasn’t even crying, and Touka felt even worse. If she wasn’t crying because of this, it meant that it had happened so many times that she had already gotten used to it.

From the sudden outburst of one of their masters, the women from Kingdom Washuu sped up their movements tenfold and within minutes they were out of the kitchen with the food intended for their masters.

Truly, it was a pitiful sight.

Touka and her fellow servants were the next to finish and the rushed out the kitchen doors hurriedly, fearing that they had taken too long to prepare the meal after witnessing the rage of the higher up from Kingdom Washuu.

Apparently, they weren’t even late. Breakfast was usually served to the king at around eight in the morning. It was seven-forty-five now. Even the king and his higher ups seemed surprised at how quick their breakfasts were served.

“What’s wrong?” Ken asked her when she stopped beside him to set his plate of food on the table. “It’s fifteen minutes too early for breakfast.”

”I’ll tell you later.” She whispered. 

* * *

After Touka had eaten her breakfast she, and a few other servants, were sent to clean the dining table. She had her eyes fixated on the large bowl of fruit sitting in the centre.

She could take a few for the starving children. But she could only do it when nobody was watching her. Even if there wasn’t anybody there to see her, her uniform only had a small pocket for her pocket watch, and she wasn’t about to go out looking like she had a deformity in her stomach.

So, she bided her time, pretended to polish all the tableware until they were all—seemingly—free from any sort of grime. 

After some time, the other servants had cleared out and she could, finally, attempt to take the fruit for the children.

She started reaching for the fruit, but barely had any time to snatch her hand back when she heard footsteps approaching her. Touka bit back a curse. She hadn’t managed to take any of the fruit.

”Well,” A deep voice tumbled behind her. “The little girl from Kingdom Goat.”

The voice sent cold shivers down her spine. Fear was starting to crawl up her throat slowly. She recognised the voice. It was King Yamori.

Turning around, she smiled at the enormous man before her, trying her best to mask her panickness. “Good morning, King Yamori.”

The man’s eyes narrowed at her, as if he was expecting her to prostrate before him out of fear. She wouldn’t give him that.

”And what are you doing in my dining hall?” He asked with a liquid voice. “The others have already finished cleaning the dining hall. You should be, too.”

Touka cursed inwardly. She had not foreseen this event and had not come up with a proper lie to slide her way out of this.

She looked at the imposing man before her. “My King, I have been instructed to clean the tableware as best as I could and I am merely fulfilling my duty.”

The look on his face told her that he wasn’t believing her. She could feel the panic in her heart increase tenfold when his pupils slid to the bowl of fruit. Right next to her.

His eyes snapped back to her in realisation and he stared her down with wide, intimidating golden eyes. 

“Are you lying to me, girl?” He asked quietly, a dangerous edge to his voice. “You do know what will happen if you are lying.”

It took all her willpower to not back away from the king. She opened her mouth to give a response, but she was cut off by another voice.

”Leave her alone.”

Touka turned, watching as another man stepped into the room. She recognised him as Ken’s closest friend; Hide.

By the point she was silently thanking the gods for his arrival. God knows what would have popped out from her mouth had he not arrived.

”She is fulfilling her duty, as she said,” Hide said in an almost nonchalant voice. “I don’t see why you have no reason to believe her. As far as I can see, the tableware is shining.”

The king turned his head to the tableware so fast that Touka was surprised that he hadn't broken his neck. He reached for the plate closest to him and inspected it. It was shiny, so shiny that he could see his own reflection.

Without another word, the king turned and left the room, grumbling about something that Touka chose to ignore.

"Thank you." She said to Hide with a sigh of relief.

"Don't mention it," He said with a smile. "The King is looking for you. Good thing I managed to get to you before Yamori did. And you may want to take the fruit with you."

Touka's heart gave a light jump. He had known that she was planning on taking the fruit, but for what reason he didn't.

"And where is the King?" She asked.

Hide nodded his head towards the hallway that was closest to the castle entrance. "He's near the entrance of the castle."

With another word of thanks, she grabbed two apples and a pear before dashing off.

Like Hide said, Ken was near the entrance of the castle. His back against the metal gates and his arms folded. From outside the castle, there were civilians looking at him, some scared and some curious.

He looked up when he had detected her presence and raised his eyebrows at the fruit she was carrying.

"For the children?" He asked as she neared him.

"How did you know?" Touka quipped, breathless from running.

Ken shrugged. "It was obvious. You even looked ready to toss my breakfast to the children earlier this morning."

Touka flushed. She would have definitely given food to the children, but never the king's food. 

“That’s not true...” She murmured.

Quickly changing the subject, Touka said, “So, why did you want to meet me?” 

Ken hesitated in his answer. The main reason was out of fear that Yamori could get to her and he would be too late to stop him. But the other reason was because he just wanted to spend time with her. His time with her in the next few days would be limited due to meetings with the other kings, and he wanted to spend as much time with her as possible before he had to sit in the empty room with the other kings for agonisingly long hours.

“I just wanted to know if you were alright,” He spoke quietly, opening the gate for him and Touka to walk out. “You look awfully tired.”

Touka groaned and used her free hand to palm her face. “Please don’t mention anything about sleep. I don’t need anyone to remind about everything I heard last night.”

Ken chuckled softly. “I understand. They were loud, weren’t they?”

She groaned louder as she was painfully reminded of the restless night she had to endure.

”I don’t understand how you handle it,” She admitted. “You look well and dandy.”

Ken looked up into the sky as if he were thinking long and hard about an answer. “There’s an art to it.”

Touka snorted as they neared the closest children, who were all staring intently on the fruit in her arms. She knelt down and offered them an apple while muttering ‘art, my bloody head’.

”No, really.” Ken said, watching as the children hesitantly took the fruit from her before running off.

She eyed him skeptically, her eyes squinting as she did. “Bull dung.”

”I’m being serious,” he said seriously. “You just need many pillows to block out the sound. And maybe hum to yourself.”

She threw a savage glare in his direction. “Excuse me, Ken. I do not know if you know of this, but servants are entitled to only one pillow. Requests for more would be denied.”

He frowned. He had thought that the servants just didn’t want a second pillow to be rude.

”Why not take one of mine?”

After she had given the last fruit to a child, she turned to him with an exasperated look on her face.

”And what would the others think? That I’m some thief or stalker who stole your pillow?” She huffed. “Either way, there is nothing I can do to block out the noise.”

Ken said nothing more of the subject as they continued on their little walk. His next few words were of an entirely different subject.

* * *

While breakfast had been free from any blood, the same couldn’t be said for lunch and dinner. The only good thing about this time was that Touka didn’t see any of it.

She had excused herself just when the Kingdom Aogiri servants were about to butcher the animals and had came back when she could no longer hear blood gushing.

All she saw was blood on the floor and cut pieces of the animal for both meals.

After dinner, Touka had stared out the window from the hallway leading to her shared room some time, watching the children outside scavenge for any bits of food on the ground. She would have to try again tomorrow.

“Hey.”

She didn’t even have to turn to see who it was. She already recognised his scent and could hear him walking for some time already.

He stood next to her closely. “What are you looking at? You don’t usually do this at the castle.”

Touka smiled. He always paid attention to where she was in the castle based on smell. Her smile disappeared when she focussed on what she had been looking at. Her finger pointed outside.

”The children,” She murmured softly, feeling pity eat away at her heart. “They don’t have enough to eat. I’m afraid that they’ll starve to death.”

Ken shook his head. “That is how it is in Kingdom Aogiri. Yamori does not care for his subjects and never will. All he wants is jewellery and a luxurious life.”

He tapped his head against her in a small sign of affection. “We’ll try again tomorrow. I’ll see what I can do to provide them with food.”

And she was looking at him with a shocked face. Her face was in shock, but her eyes told him she was feeling a million different types of emotion that all related to happiness.

”Thank you.” She whispered.

* * *

The kings would sleep first. Their higher ups would wander around the castle, making sure that no other servant, assassin, or traitor would sneak in to murder their king.

Hide was doing just that. His arms were folded behind his head as he wandered throughout the halls, leaving no hallway and unoccupied room unchecked. It was his duty to protect his king and friend.

Shuu was across the hall from him. They nodded their heads at each other as they passed by, a silent greeting and notice that nothing of danger was nearby. 

They didn’t have much to worry about. While Kingdom Aogiri was the most disgusting kingdom out of all of them, they had good military that were prepared for anything. Even if they weren’t there, Hide could use his excellent sense of smell to detect any foreign scent. 

He had to use his sense of smell because majority of his sense of hearing was blocked by wads of cotton, which he had stuffed into his ears to muffle the sounds coming from the rooms assigned to the higher ups from Kingdom Washuu.

Something was in the air now.

Hide stilled, frozen in the position he was in as he pulled the wads of cotton from his ears, blocking out the noise and trying to focus on a single sound.

The sound that came from Ken’s room was certain. He couldn’t make out what sort of noise it was from the vigorous pants coming from the other rooms, but he knew that he had heard something.

Then, he could smell sweat. 

As a wolf, he already memorised the scents of his fellow higher ups and king. Each of them had their own unique scent that was amplified when they sweated. The king was no exception to this.

It was a good time for Kingdom Washuu’s higher ups to stop their activities now. Hide could now hear the noise in Ken’s room.

Whispers of words filled with so much fear and anxiety. Pleads with so much emotion behind them. A presence of the physical manifestation of fear in the air.

Hide was about ready to take off running to Ken’s room when it happened.

The same bloodcurdling scream that terrorised his nightmares when he and Ken were children. The scream that only appeared after the previous king and queen had passed. The only scream that Ken would ever tear out from his throat.

As his feet hit the ground with a loud thud, he quickly registered that the screaming had evolved into that of a loud roar. This wouldn’t be easy.

Screams from Ken during nights indicated bad nightmares; either the vision of his parents’ last looks at him or the visions his subconscious would show him of his murdered victims in his rages which Shuu had tested out with blood.

Roars indicated _horrible_ nightmares. Ken would never tell him what they were about, but they were so horrible to the point he would wake up roaring, having shifted into a wolf in the middle of his slumber, trying to defend himself against whatever had been haunting him in his nightmares.

By the time he had reached his king’s room, Kazuichi and Shuu had already entered the room, the door knob broken from how they had to force their way inside the locked room.

”SHE’S DEAD!” He heard Ken scream. “I COULDN’T STOP HIM!”

For the first time, Hide had an insight into what the nightmares that had him roaring in fear showed him.

Ken never screamed about his late mother. He would only cry out for her. The only other woman close to him would  be Touka. And the only person known to be after her was King Yamori himself.

He had a nightmare that Yamori had slaughtered Touka right in front of him.

Hide couldn’t imagine it. Having the person you hold dear to your heart killed by the man you despise so much. The emotional turmoil would be too great to handle.

Obviously, Ken’s screaming had alerted everyone else. Kingdom Washuu’s higher ups poked their heads out of their rooms while half naked. Servants from Kingdom Aogiri, Kingdom CCG and Kingdom Anteiku has edged closer to investigate what had happened.

Of course, Kingdom Goat’s own servants had left their room to check on their king. Each of them, including Touka, had a worried expression on their faces as they inches closer to their king’s room, curious as to what had happened for their king to be screaming like that.

Out of nowhere, Kazuichi and Shuu had been launched out of the room, their backs hit the walls behind them and they scrambled to get back up to calm Ken.

The initial roar had calmed, but Ken didn’t. When Touka snuck a peak in (despite Hide telling her and the other servants not to), she could see Ken curled up in a corner on his bed, his back to her and his body trembling as Kazuichi and Shuu attempted to comfort him through encouraging words and rubs on his back. Through her sensitive ears, she could hear him mumbling.

”I was too late...” He murmured to himself, hugging himself with his arms. “She’s dead... and it’s all my fault...”

”My King,” She heard Shuu whisper. “Please, at least cover your face, lest the others see your face.”

After hearing his words, Touka was suddenly aware of the small crowd of people outside Ken’s door. They weren’t worried for this man. They were just interested in finally seeing his face.

”Go back to your rooms,” Hide said, his voice loud as he tried to get everybody’s attention. “Please. The Nameless King wishes to be left with his higher ups now.”

The kings had retreated when Hide had finished his sentence, albeit with some reluctance. They had told their servants and higher ups to leave as well and soon, the small crowd had been reduced to Ken’s higher ups and servants.

The higher ups quietly left after realising that there was nothing they could do to help their king in his current state. They didn’t want to do it. They would rather just stay and comfort him to the best of their abilities. But they knew that it wouldn’t work.

Touka was ready to return to the room she shared with her fellow servants when Hide’s hand landed on her shoulder.

She turned to face the man, who had a grim expression on his face as he leaned in to speak to her.

”Go in,” He whispered. “I think you may be able to comfort him.”

Touka turned her head to look over her shoulders, making sure that nobody else outside of people from her current kingdom saw this. After confirming that nobody else was in the vicinity, she slowly walked into the king’s room.

Kazuichi and Shuu had left the room upon her entering it, leaving her to, hopefully, calm their king as they shut the door.

The room was lit by a single candle which flowed faintly. It was on its last bit of wax and was struggling to stay afloat in its puddle of melted wax.

She could see that he was still trembling. His arms were still wrapped around his body. The murmuring had stopped, by Touka wasn’t sure if it was good or bad.

”Ken,” She calked out, walking closer to the edge of his bed.

The man in front of her turned his head ever so slightly to face him. The fear in his eyes had changed to relief when they had landed on her. She could practically see the relief flood through his entire body with how his arms sagged and his trembling increase.

She bent down slightly, reaching out with her hand to gently stroke his sweaty hair. “I’m here,” she whispered. Her hand moved from his hair to his cheek and he leaned himself towards her touch. His skin was cold from how much he had sweated.

Ken’s eyes became half lidded as she caressed his cheek and he sighed softly in contentment.

”C-Can you stay...?” He asked quietly, almost hesitantly. 

“Of course,” came her response.

Afterward, Touka had climbed into his bed and he had move slightly to make room for her. He had rested his head on her collarbone and buried his nose into her neck, inhaling her scent and reminding himself that she was alive and with him. Touka rested her hands on his back, tracing small patterns on him and planting small kisses on his head.

Soon, Ken’s breathing had become softer and more even. The arms around Touka’s waist had slackened ever so slightly and he had fallen asleep with a small, content smile on his face.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hmmm. After rewriting Following Your Scent, I have the urge to rewrite all my other fics. What do you think?


	17. Unhappy Reunion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me: I should rewrite my fanfics
> 
> Also me: *has 500 AUs planned*

Following his daily routine, Shuu walked towards the king’s door at his designated waking time and knocked on the door, listening closely for the shuffling of bedsheets that indicated the king was awake.

Only it never came.

He tried knocking again, this time with more force. Once again, there was no sound coming from the room to show that the king was stirring from his sleep.

”My King,” He called out. “Are you alright? Do you need me to come inside?”

Again, no response. He was starting to get worried. The king never, ever took this long to wake up even in his deepest sleep.

Shuu’s mind had practically flipped into overdrive when it had gone through the worse case scenarios that could have happened, even though he subconsciously knew that it would never happen.

”My King,” He called out shakily. “Please respond to me. If you do not, I will have to come inside.”

Almost nobody was allowed inside the king’s quarters. Doing that was a breach of the king’s privacy and consequences could lead to death. However, Shuu was willing to go down that path if it meant that his king was alive.

His hand hovered above the broken doorknob, ready to push open the door and bolt inside when he heard a voice.

”Ken, wake up,” The voice whispered so softly that Shuu could hardly hear it. “Please, wake up. Someone is outside.”

Shuu first noticed that the voice came from a female. Then he realised that a woman had breached the privacy of the king.

Again, his mind flipped through the worse case scenarios. She could be an assassin, or someone threatening to do something to force the king into doing something against his wishes. These scenarios were played through his mind and he never realised that the woman knew his king’s name.

He didn’t even hear the shuffling bedsheets or footsteps as he gripped the broken doorknob, ready to pull the door off it’s hinges when it was done before he could even react.

The king stood in front of him in his sleeping attire and mask on, unharmed and looking extremely _angry,_ judging by the frowned eye that was staring at him.

“What do you want?” The king growled, seemingly unhappy from being awoken even though it was time for him to start preparing for the day.

Shuu swallowed. It was seldom that the king was angry.

”It is time for you to start the day,” He spoke, trying to hide the nervousness in his voice.

The anger wiped itself off of the king’s face. “What time is my next meeting with the other kings?”

”In roughly four hours, sir.”

The king blinked, then turned away. “I will be ready in half an hour.”

The door shut and Shuu was left standing outside. There was no doubt; the woman that was sent in had spent the night with the king. However, he did not know how she spent the night with him.

* * *

”I recently heard of a mysterious group of people in Kingdom Washuu,” King Amon said, placing his hands on the table in front of him.

The kings had gathered for another meeting. In an empty room with a table in the shape of a pentagon where the kings sat at, a few of their higher ups standing behind them.

King Yamori’s eyes narrowed. “And what about them?”

”Nothing,” Amon replied smoothly. “I am just concerned. They are a group of mysterious people and I have heard that they are information brokers. However, I have yet to see them do anything, and that is what concerns me.”

King Tsuneyoshi seemed confused. “A group of people? Nonsense. I have not seen such a group within the confines of my own kingdom, and none of my people or higher ups have reported the issue to me.”

“I have not seen them,” Ken said, folding his hands on the table. “King Amon, would you please give me a brief description of these people?”

Amon nodded. “They roam in small groups, and each of them have a mask on almost all the time. My guards have attempted to apprehend them before, but they are quick and deadly and managed to escape while critically injuring one of my men.”

The group of people hadn’t went into Kingdom Goat before—at least that’s what Ken knew—but he needed to know how they looked like so he could protect his people.

”Any other major events that the rest of us should take note of?” King Yoshimura asked.

* * *

She dreaded this moment. 

From the moment she step foot into this kingdom she already knew what would happen.

The kings were all in a meeting now, meaning that the servants could do what they wanted in the period of time their kings were gone.

This, of course, meant that Touka was sneaking into the dining hall and kitchen with a small basket to, hopefully, sneak a few pieces of fruit and bread to feed the children.

However, this also meant that _he_ was roaming around the castle. And she was certain that _he_ knew that she was within the castle, too. 

 _Him_ being her younger brother, Ayato.

She had already detected his presence within the castle when she first entered and it was highly probable that he did, too.

Touka only wanted confirmation that he was alive and well. She didn’t want to meet him for some reason. She needed to get out of the castle. Fast.

Judging by the sound of his footsteps, he was directly above her on the second floor. She didn’t have much time to leave the castle. She estimated only about five minutes before she would bump into him if she didn’t do anything now.

So, she grabbed what she could; a loaf of bread, a canteen filled with water and three pieces of food before hurriedly making a beeline for the castle entrance.

Unfortunately, he seemed to have realised her intentions, because his footsteps above her also started to quicken, matching her own speed.

There was no way to outrun or hide from him. He, like her, had excellent hearing and sense of smell. So, even if she were to hide from him, he could easily sniff her out from whatever hiding location she was in.

 _Damn this skirt_ , she thought. _Restricting my movements._

She couldn’t shift into a rabbit either, as doing so would force her to abandon the small basket of food in her arms, leaving anyone to trace it back to her who stole the food.

So, just a few moments before she was out the entrance, she came to a complete halt. It was going to happen sooner or later anyways, so why run from it?

His presence was behind her and approaching fast, his footsteps were hurried as they tapped against the cobblestone pathway.

She took her time to walk towards the entrance, trying to calm her nerves and fast beating heart. She didn’t turn her head at all when she felt his presence right behind her, his warm breath somewhere near her shoulder.

”Why?” She asked, her voice barely above a whisper, her hand hovering over the gate. “After leaving my side, announcing something that I didn’t understand, you come and find me?”

He ignored her question. “Why are you here?”

”Do I have reason to not be here?” She retorted. 

“Did you track me down to drag me home?” He demanded.

Anger was bubbling through her veins as she turned around to face her brother, not prepared to have to tilt her head upwards from his sudden growth in height.

”Are you blind?” She asked in a mocking manner. “Look at what I’m wearing! It is _so_ obvious that I’m here to drag you back home after I murdered a maid to pretend to be one! Not like the higher ups can’t detect my scent or anything!”

The nerve of her brother. Leaving her and then demanding to know why she was here.

She took a deep breath. She was already an adult, and there was no point in yelling at a stubborn brat.

“Just tell me why you left that day,” She said, her voice pained and barely above a whisper. “Just tell me why.”

Her younger brother merely stared at her, an unreadable expression swimming in his eyes.

”Well?” Touka demanded. “Ayato, there is no point in our conversation if you aren’t going to say anything.”

”...you wouldn’t believe me even if I told you.” He said to her. “So there is no point if I do tell you the reasons for me leaving.”

She figured that he would say something like that. Always, always hiding his secrets from her. He had done that since they were children.

Touka sighed, then gave a bitter smile. “Then, there is nothing to say. You’ll never listen to anything I say anyway. I’ll give you the freedom you want; to make your own decisions.”

Oh, the words he had screamed at her on that night. The words that had run deep into her heart and made her believe she was a failure as an older sister.

_”You’re always deciding what I do and when I do things! I want my freedom! I deserve to have my own freedom, not have my life chosen by a clingy sister!”_

She didn’t have the right to ask him why. It was for the better for the both of them, anyways.

He wouldn’t have to break down crying while hugging his older sister, wouldn’t have to reveal the love he had for her, wouldn’t have to reveal that he had left her just to protect her, and wouldn’t have to reveal how badly he had cried when he left her side.

* * *

”You seemed stressed,” Amon said quietly, walking next to the Nameless King.

”Do I?” Ken replied, keeping his eyes facing forward.

The taller man smiled. “It must have been a bad one, for you to scream like that.”

Amon was a close friend of his. The only king he had confided in during times when his higher ups were not available. The only man he had told about what he saw in his horrific nightmares.

”I’m surprised you managed to get back to sleep,” Amon continued. “Though, it shouldn’t be too hard. I saw the woman that went into your room.”

Ken froze, and slowly turned to face the other man.

”How was it?” Amon asked nonchalantly.

”E-Excuse me?”

The taller man seemed confused. “You did sleep with her, no?”

”God, no!” Ken exclaimed, his jaw wide open behind his mask. “Amon, just because I have a woman in my room does not mean I slept with her!”

Amon raised his hands slightly and gave a small chuckle. “Alright, alright. I’m sorry for having the wrong idea.”

A thought came to Ken’s head.

”Have there been any kings who have married servants?”

Amon raised his eyebrows. “Of course. In fact, you’re looking at one now.”

Ken’s eyes widened. “Queen Akira was once a servant?”

”Of course,” Amon said. “I was drawn to her because my parents allowed me to play with her when we were children. Then, I began to think about her each time the subject of marriage was brought up by my parents. It took a very long time, but I eventually stated that I would not continue my bloodline if I could not marry her.”

Ken remained silent for a short period of time before nodding his head. “I see.” He mumbled. “And what did your citizens think of this?”

Amon shrugged. “I understand that many of them were not happy with my decision, but none of them spoke against it. In that sense, I don’t know what many of them thought of my marriage to Akira.”

“I see.”

* * *

On a good day, Touka would be going out to the heart of the kingdom, walking around in the kingdom and enjoying the scenery around her. She would usually enjoy watching people go about their business. There was something so relaxing about it.

But in Kingdom Aogiri? It was a whole different story. She didn’t even want to fully enter the village. She would only hover around the area where she would sneak food for the children.

Compared to Kingdom Goat, Kingdom Aogiri was a slum. 

Not only were the emaciated children just pitiful, the grown ups—especially the ones who had enough to eat—were eyeing her as if she was their next meal. It unsettled her to say the least.

There was nothing to do in the castle, and she despised that. She could stand at one of the windows and look on outside, but the sad atmosphere of the kingdom just made her turn away from the window.

There was no garden for her to just sit in and listen to the wind blow by, or for the scent of grass to envelope her body. There wasn’t even knitting material for her to fiddle around with.

Frankly speaking, she was bored out of her mind.

There wasn’t anything assigned to her or her fellow servants to do, and none of them had anything to chat about other than how horrible of a place this kingdom was. Even then, they couldn’t chat about this topic in fear that a servant that resided in this kingdom would overhear their conversation and report it to their king.

”What are you doing?” A voice asked softly.

”Being bored out of my mind,” she replied in a monotone voice.

Ken chuckled, then walked to stand in front of her. “Talk to me if you are bored.”

She turned around to smile at him. “what conversational topics do you have?”

He raised his visible eyebrow. “Well, what do you want to hear? I have political issues, social issues and economical issues between the kingdoms to talk about, if you want to listen to it.”

Touka tilted her head to one side. “Aren’t those topics strictly for the kings’ ears?”

”Who said they were?” Ken replied. “I speak to whomever I wish to about whatever topic I want to talk about.”

* * *

Talking to Ken was, indeed, a good way to pass the time. Despite the conversation being mainly about serious topics that she didn’t even know about, she enjoyed their time together.

They had only stopped their conversation due to Nishiki coming up and alerting her that it was time for her to start preparing dinner. Only then was she aware of how much time had passed.

Once again, the cuts of animal flesh had already been done beforehand, leaving her job much easier. So, she prepared the king’s meal, served it, then proceeded to prepare her own. After that, she took a short shower before going back into the servants’ room. She had no more duties for the day, so she would have to stay in the room.

Nighttime was more peaceful as compared to daytime. She enjoyed her time sitting on the bed, looking out the small window, and staring into the star filled skies. She did that a lot with her family when they were still whole.

Memories of sitting outside their little wood house, lying on the cooling grass and pointing at stars filled her head. It was one of her favourite things to do when she was a child. She could still remember hunting for shooting stars with her brother.

Ayato.

Her thoughts grew sad when they went back to the night he had left.

It had always been her fault, hadn’t it?

”Touka.”

She snapped out of her thoughts, then turned her head to see Ken standing by the door, a worried expression in his visible eye.

”Are you alright?” He asked worriedly. “You look very upset.”

There was no use in lying to him, really. He could practically smell out lies.

”Do you want to talk about it?” He offered quietly, walking over and taking her hand in his, gripping it gently.

”I guess.” She said softly, allowing herself to be led towards his room.

He settled her on his bed, then sat next to her before removing his mask and throwing it to the table next to his bed.

”What happened?” He asked as he rapidly blinked his other eye that had been covered for the entire day. The bright light provided by the many candles in his room were not kind to his usually hidden eye.

”I met my brother today.”

Ken turned to face her, knowing that her brother had always been a sensitive topic to her. Meeting him again must have been very emotionally impactful on her.

”What happened?” He asked again, inching closer to her and placing his hand over hers.

Her lips pulled into a thin before she started to chew on her lower lip, something that she did when she was struggling to find the right words to describe something. “He followed me for a while, then I demanded to know why he left me that night. He refused to tell me because, apparently, I wouldn’t believe his reasons.”

Ken frowned, his brows knitting. “I think it’s understandable. Men tend to hide their true feelings. It’s a very high chance that the reason he gave you for leaving was a false one. It’s also highly likely that he truly did not want to leave your side.”

”What makes you say that?” She instantly asked.

”I am a man, aren’t I?” He said simply. “There have been many times where I had to lie in order to achieve something, whether if I liked it or not. Most of these times, the decision I had made was beneficial for the kingdom, and not for me. It’s a way for us to, somehow, preserve our pride. Have you never made such a decision?”

Touka thought back to the day when she had been asked to transfer to Kingdom Goat. She never would have even thought about leaving the house she grew up in. There were just too many memories. However, one thought about the many families that were starving due to the food supply being unable to feed the large population, and she had made her decision to accept the transfer. Even though she did not want to leave her home, leaving it would mean more children would grow up healthy.

He seemed to know what she was thinking of.

”The children would benefit more if you left the kingdom, right?” He murmured. 

She sighed. “I know he has his reasons. But I just wished he would have told me.”

”I understand,” he whispered, wrapping an arm around her. “Humans hide secrets and it’s only natural.”

Knowing that she felt upset, Ken wrapped his other arm around her so that he was holding her in an awkward hug. He pulled her along as he flopped back onto his bed, smirking when he heard her shriek from the sudden movement.

He planted his lips on the crown of her head. “Go and sleep. You need the rest.”

Touka nodded and made the move to leave, but Ken’s arms were firmly holding her down.

”Where are you going?”

She felt heat rise up to her face. He wanted her to stay with him again?

”A-Again?” She stammered.

”Why not?” He said with a small smirk on his face.

She smacked him across the face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, you won’t see an update after this one until around after November 2nd. Nationals start next week for me and I can’t find the time to type out another 4000 word chapter.
> 
> By the way, if you’re looking for fluff for this fanfic, it’ll come very soon.


	18. Child Assassin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I’m back! My math paper fucking destroyed more than half of the country taking the paper and I’m not sure if I can pass my nationals because for some fucking reason, we need math to pass. Early admission to college for fucking nothing if I don’t pass. Anyways, enjoy the chapter!

It was fortunate that they had managed to go through the entire duration of the Kings' Meeting without much trouble. The only thing that had bothered Touka for the remaining days was the people from Kingdom Washuu. She did not want to go through that ever again.

She was happy to see the kingdom she had stayed at for a while. Happy to be back in the castle again and resume her duties. Most of all, she was happy that she didn’t have to hear anything during the night.

When she had first returned to the castle, she had practically flung herself into the garden (as a rabbit) and ran around for hours. Being deprived of the garden made her do this.

Even though it had only been a few days, she had sorely missed the castle. And even though it was chilly outside, she was still running around in the gardens. That was how much she missed the castle. When the cold wasn’t even able to stop her.

”Having fun?”

She skidded to a stop, her tiny bunny paws slid across the browning grass and almost collided with a pair of feet. She had been so into her activity that she hadn’t even registered that someone else was with her.

Her expert sense of smell alone was able to tell her who was in front of her. Despite that, she looked up.

Lo and behold, Ken was standing in front of her in all his ‘kingly’ glory.

He was such an idiot when they were alone together. Such a helpless romantic, too. Her face flushed when she thought of the numerous kisses he had initiated when they were alone, and she was thankful that no colour would show up on her face in her current form.

Without warning, Ken bent down to pick her up in his hands, and she squirmed around. She was small enough to be placed on his hands and still have room to wander a little.

”You are very rude, aren’t you?” He joked. “A king is bestowing upon you his presence, and yet you try to run from him?”

Her beady black eyes told him ‘very funny’.

He gently nuzzled her. “You know that I’m only joking.”

She said nothing in response, preferring to remain silent in the peacefulness. 

The soft hum of the winds and the rustling of the grass and leave around her, combined with the warmth of Ken’s hands was more than enough to make her feel sleepy. She hadn’t slept very well when they were in Kingdom Aogiri.

”The little bunny is tired, hm?” Ken spoke softly. “Do you want to sleep?”

She didn’t give a response. She had already fallen asleep.

* * *

Once again, Ken had brought Touka to his room. She didn’t shift back upon falling asleep, so Ken only had to plop her down on a pillow and swaddle her with blankets.

As much as he would love to stay with her, he had work to do. Some work had piled up over the few days he was gone, and he had to complete it before it increased any further.

He sat down on his chair in his office, staring questionably at an envelope that was smack in the middle of his desk. Usually, the papers he would have to look through were just papers, not envelopes. Envelopes he received were usually from other kings or a reported case from one of the guards regarding something serious.

There was no reason for a king to be sending him a letter. So, it had to be the latter reasoning.

Shrugging, he tore the envelope open and began reading its contents.

_My King,_

_You have instructed us to deliver an envelope in the most serious cases. As this is a serious case, this letter has been presented to you._

_While you were away, two of our soldiers have been slain. They were killed in their barracks and witnesses say that they saw children clad in black running out of the barracks afterwards. We could not trace them._

_We have been trying to find the children, but nobody else within the kingdom has seen them._

Ken frowned. He would have immediately sent one of his higher ups to question King Tsuneyoshi or King Yamori because he _knew_ that either one of them might know something about this. About the ‘mysterious group’ that they discussed during the meetings. But, what prevented him was the word ‘children’.

Children.

Children who were skilled enough to take down two of his soldiers. 

He knew for a fact that, despite how secretive some kingdoms were, none of them ever trained child soldiers. Not even Kingdom Aogiri. 

There was no information regarding these children. No information meaning that they could easily disguise themselves as innocent and orphaned children, thrown out like a bag of trash. And he knew just how sympathetic his people were, and that they were more than willing to allow the children into their houses for a warm meal and a comfortable bed.

He had to warn his people. Now.

Frantically, he reached for the ropes that called his higher ups, yanking at them repeatedly until all of them entered his office, worry in their eyes.

”My King?” Shuu said. “What is the matter?”

”Out. Now.” Ken practically snarled. “Tell the citizens to _not_ let _any_  homeless or hungry children into their houses. Do not let them in, even if they desire to. Doing so may cost them their lives.”

His higher ups exchanged a few questioning glances with one another, but said nothing as they bolted from the room, running to the stables to retrieve their horses.

Ken cursed. What if one of his servants had allowed a child in? What if the servant who did so was dead, lying lifelessly with a rotting body in an empty room of his castle?

As if the thought itself triggered it, a pungent odor filled his nostrils, and his eyes watered from the intensity of it.

He stumbled to his door, pulling it open. He scanned his surroundings with a blurred eye as he tried to make out where the scent was originating from. 

The scent originated from someone's room. More specifically, the Head Butler's room.

Ken swallowed the thick saliva that had accumulated in his throat. The smell was getting worse and worse as he neared the room.

The Head Butler was a quiet man. Ken didn't know him very well, he didn't even know his name. But he knew him well enough to know that the Head Butler had a very muted sense of smell. There could be a fire burning and he wouldn't even take notice until the fires reached his room.

Now that he thought about it; the Head Butler was not present when he arrived back at the castle.

Slowly, he opened the door, its hinges creaking as he did so, taking note of a slight floral scent that had been mixed with the acidic pungent odor. He peered half his face into the slightly darkened room, then the whole face when he realised that there was no immediate danger.

There was a cupboard next to the door, and he quickly threw it open and blindly slapped his hand against the shelves until he found a candle. It was dusty.

Acting quickly, Ken introduced the candle's wick to another lit candle just outside the Head Butler's room before entering the room yet again.

The scene was horrific.

A white blanket laid on the floor, wrapping something that was leaking a brown, foul smelling juice. Ken already knew what the blanket was wrapping, but he dared to step closer to unwrap it.

The Head Butler's rotting face stared at him with almost hollow eyes. His entire body had been covered with maggots, protruding out from the skin at the smallest pressure like a zit. A stab wound was located at his chest, just over the heart.

Ken quickly covered his nose using his sleeve before he could throw up whatever was inside his stomach. He looked around, shock and dread filling his heart when he noticed the vast array of flowers in the Head Butler's room. He quickly put two and two together. The flowers had been used to cover up the scent of the corpse.

He tilted his head up slightly, noticing that the window in the Head Butler's room had not been damaged.

Unable to take the smell anymore, he bolted from the room and headed downstairs to the kitchen, where the servants were about to prepare his dinner.

Needless to say, the servants were rather surprised to see a hunched over king that looked as if he was ready to throw up at their faces.

"My King?" They said in unison.

"All of you lot," Ken rasped, trying to keep the bile down. "Did _any_ of you open the castle doors for a child?"

Hinami was the one who spoke up. "No, my King. There was a child who came for food multiple times, but we only handed him bread and left him outside the castle."

"Did you stay to see if he had left after you did so?"

"No, sir."

Ken ran a hand through his snow coloured hair. The castle was heavily guarded at almost all times. Servants would enter every single room to clean during the day time. Why had nobody checked on the Head Butler?

"The Head Butler?" He asked, trying to keep the panic out of his voice. "I didn't see him today."

"He told us he was sick and he would manage the cleanliness of his room and his nutrition by himself."

"And did any of you lot realise that he never came out from his room?"

His question took instantaneous effect. Every single individual in the kitchen widened their eyes. Some had their jaws drop slightly.

"The Head Butler is dead." He announced. "He was stabbed in his own room and left to die. And none of you bothered to check on him?"

Ken was about to berate all of them when another servant had come in.

"The child is back fo--My King..." He said after noticing the king himself was in the kitchen.

"The child?" Ken almost seethed. "What child?"

The servant raised his eyebrows. “I—It is a young boy who frequently comes during the night, looking for food. We just provide him with a small slice of bread.”

”Take me to him, now.”

* * *

Sure enough, there was a young boy right outside the castle, patiently waiting for his small portion of bread.

Ken didn’t believe him.

The boy wasn’t skinny enough to be looking like a boy who hadn’t eaten much for a long period of time and only survived by eating small bits here and there.

Despite the mud smeared on the boy’s face, Ken could tell that he looked relatively healthy. His skin looked soft and smooth and he had meat growing in the right places. Even his clothing looked clean enough to let him know that he had not been homeless or hungry for very long.

He did not trust this boy.

It was obvious that the young boy was not expecting the king himself to turn up right in front of him, evident by his eyes widening. His small arms clutched at his waist. 

Something was there.

Ken turned to the servant. “Did you ever search him for any weapons?”

”No, sir.”

Before the child could even react, Ken grasped his hands tightly and held him up in the air by his hands. The boy thrashed about and screamed as Ken reached towards the boy’s waist. 

He found a knife. 

With horror, he realised that the blade of the knife was sharp and deadly, like it was meant to be used to kill people. Such a young and, supposedly, abandoned child could not find nor sharpen a blade to this extent.

”And what were you going to do with this?” He questioned dangerously.

Any innocence the child had in his eyes vanished. A blank expression replaced his original fearful one as he stared at the king with an amused expression in his dark eyes.

”You should know by now.” The child said quietly, not bothering to continue to act innocent. “The group of children who slayed two of your soldiers. You should know why we are here.”

We.

The realisation had slammed into his head. They had already heard the announcement and they were going to kill him.

But, he wasn’t in his office, and if they couldn’t find him there, their next location to search for him would be...

Ken flipped the boy upside down and held onto one of his legs. With a single swift movement from his strength, he had easily broken the child’s legs. He ignored the cries of his servant and the child as he broke the other, too. To ensure that the child would not run away. He practically shoved the boy into the servant’s hands before turning around.

”Do _not_ let him get away!” He screeched as he bolted for his bedroom.

* * *

Touka was seriously wondering how she managed to end up in this position; still as a bunny, and struggling to hide herself from whoever was in the room.

She had already woken up when she detected the foul scent in the air that almost made her throw up on Ken’s bed. And just when she was about to make a beeline for the door, she saw the shadows of two individuals just outside the window. Thinking quickly, she had hidden herself by diving between the pillows and burrowing herself as deep as possible, praying that whoever was outside the window did not have a good sense of smell. 

She cursed when she heard the people step in. The window was not closed.

”Where’s the king?” A soft yet high pitched voice asked. Touka realised that it was a child.

”You’re asking me that?” Another voice hissed. “If you can’t see him, what makes you think I can?”

”Well, if he’s not in his office or his bedroom, then where the hell is he?” The first voice asked.

”Dinner, maybe?”

”Can’t be. Hajime told me that they were still preparing the king’s dinner when he was about to ask for bread again.”

”Did he lie to us? The king isn’t here.”

What were children doing in the room? How did they get up here in the first place? Why were they even here? All these questions and many more swirled around in Touka’s head like an endless whirlpool, but she quickly shook her head to dispel her thoughts as she focused on staying alive.

Whatever focus she had on staying alive was quickly, and quite literally, blown away.

The door the led outside had flung off its hinges and Ken blew in like a hurricane, immediately charging after the two children when he laid his eyes on them. The duo were not fast enough to evade Ken, and were subsequently tackled to the floor. His brute strength was enough to keep both of them on the floor, unable to draw their weapons.

He shifted, keeping them pinned to the floor with his paw as he scanned the room for Touka, almost sighing in relief when he saw her pop out from the space in between his pillows.

Before he could check if she was all right, he had to deal with the other two in the room. He already decided that the boy that he had incapacitated outside would be more than enough for information, so the other two could go.

Without any hesitation, Ken had crushed their heads between his paw and the floor. A sense of satisfaction leaked into his heart when he felt the bone crunching between his paw, the warm blood flowing between his paw and the rug. He flicked his paw slightly after he was done.

”Are you alright?” He asked slowly, approaching Touka as he reverted back to human form.

She was sitting on his bed, also in human form, staring at him with a shocked expression on her face. Her eyes darted back and forth between him and the now headless children.

”Child assassins,” He said quickly. “They were sent to murder me. If they had found you in my place, who knows what they would have done to you.”

Touka muttered something under her breath, something along the lines of ‘being lucky she hid’.

Ken knew it was a large mistake to have killed children in front of Touka. He knew how much she loved children and how much she loathed to see them harmed, let alone killed. But he had no choice in this matter. It was either their lives or hers, and he was not going to allow a woman he loved so dearly to die.

”Are you angry?” He asked quietly. “That I did...”

His eye slid over to view the headless children.

If Touka was being completely honest, she wasn’t angry. Not one bit. Although these assassins were children, they deserved punishment for attempting to take the life of the king. Without a king, this kingdom would crumble into dust.

”No.” she admitted. “I’m not.”

Ken sighed in relief. His eyes darted towards the dead bodies again, and he sighed.

”It’s a mess, isn’t it?” He said. “Now I won’t be able to sleep until they clean it up.”

Touka offered a small yet humoured smile. “Unfortunate for you.” She joked. “I get to sleep earlier. I’m tired from all the little hours of sleep I received during our time in Kingdom Aogiri.”

Ken frowned. “You won’t stay up with me and keep me company?”

There it was. After over a decade, she finally saw it again. 

His puppy eyes. Or, in this case, eye.

He would _always_ do that when they were children. And she would never be able to resist. He was just so cute back then, and even now, despite having the mask cover more than half of his face.

She pulled her lips into a thin line and pretended to think it over.

”Please?”

”Why not?” She finally said with a smirk.

* * *

Ken had left her in his office as he hurried down to deal with everything else.

”My King?” Kazuichi asked worriedly. “What do you want us to do with this child?”

He eyed the little boy in front of him. His short legs were dangling at an odd angle as Kazuichi held him by his hands in mid air.

”...put him in the dungeons.” Ken muttered darkly. “I’ll deal with him first thing tomorrow morning.”

He turned towards Shuu. “Double the guards in the castle. I want more archers scouting the area. Two more of this boy’s companions infiltrated my room earlier. I have already taken care of them. Send for the maids to clean up the blood.”

Shuu seemed horrified when Ken had mentioned that someone had broken into his room, but he nodded his head, albeit in an almost frantic manner.

”My companions...?” The boy whispered. “Wh... What did you do to them...?”

Ken raised his eyebrow in amusement. “Do you really want to know, boy?”

The young lad stared up at him, a look of curiosity and disgust evident in his eyes.

The king leaned in next to the boy’s ear and whispered. “I crushed their heads. It was an amazing feeling, I’ll tell you. Their screams for mercy as I destroyed their skulls and brains.”

When he pulled away, the same satisfying feeling he felt earlier seeped back into his heart when he saw the dread, anger and fear etch into the the young boy’s face.

”Identify his shifting form,” Ken ordered. “I want no information to be leaked out in any way.”

“Yes, sir.” Kazuichi said quietly.

Ken eyes the rest of his higher ups. His eyes landed on Hide.

”Hide, the Head Butler has been murdered.” He said softly, ignoring his friend’s contorting face from worry to fear. “I don’t know when he was murdered, but I fear for the lives of the servants. Make sure that nobody else is within the castle boundaries. Check every room and leave no spot undetected.”

”Yes, my king.”

”Get the others excluding Kazuichi and Shuu to aid you. I want this castle to be as safe as possible for the night.”

”Yes, sir.”

With that, Ken went back upstairs. He had to resist biting on his nails as he climbed the spiraling staircase. He didn’t ask for Touka to stay up to keep him company. He asked for her to stay up with him so that he could make sure that she wasn’t harmed in any way.

His soldiers had been murdered and his castle had been infiltrated. It was no longer that safe in the castle any more.

He had to prioritise her safety first within the castle boundaries. His higher ups had combat experience and could defend themselves. The other servants would more than likely be blatantly dismissed as a target for the assassins, as they provided no advantage for them.

But Touka? She was special. Not just special because she held a place in his heart. But because if he had not killed the two boys, she would have become a target, too.

He couldn’t risk that. 

He wouldn’t risk that.

He couldn’t lose her.

Ken shakily pushed his office door open, almost sighing in relief when he found her reading a book from his office. No one else had come in.

”Your books are hard to understand,” She said quietly, in an almost amused manner. “So many difficult words.”

His worries seemed to melt away from his heart as he smiled through his mask. “Why not I teach you?”

A few moments after, they were seated in front of the fireplace in his office. She sat on his lap and read as he aided her in learning new words.

Having her this close was perfect for him. He enjoyed her company very, very much and it also made him aware that he was in reality and not dreaming. 

She was safe with him. For now, it was all that mattered.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok but the worst thing about being a fanfic author is that halfway through a fanfic and you’re already thinking about plots for another fanfic. *cough* vampire/fantasy/Human/Childhood AU *cough* what do you think?


	19. Torture

As promised, Ken had gone off to the dungeons first thing in the morning when he woke up. He had sent Touka off for bed after his room was cleaned before falling asleep on his own.

And now, he was standing face to face with the young boy from the night before. He, outside the filthy and dark cell and beyond the iron bars. The child, inside said space, sitting on a rotting wooden chair, hands chains and head down.

”Has he tried anything?” Ken asked quietly. Shuu had been guarding the boy the whole night.

”No, my king.” Came the steady and almost emotionless reply. There was no reason for them to show emotion in front of an assassin, child or not.

Ken remained silent for a few moments, staring at the child in the cell.

”Open it.”

”B-But, my K—“

”Open it.” He repeated, his voice heavy with finality.

Shuu sighed, but opened the cell anyways.

Ken stepped in without hesitation, still staring at the boy. He knelt down in front of the boy’s face and tilted his head upwards. The young lad was staring at him with a nasty expression on his face.

”Your name, boy?” He asked.

He received a spit to the face as his answer. For once, he was happy for the mask that protected his face from the wad of spit.

”Talk,” He growled. “Where do you come from and who do you work under?”

No response.

Ken chortled softly. He was expecting this, and he would enjoy every single moment of it. The boy brought this upon himself, and it was a shame that such a young little child had to go through something like this.

”Shuu, get the torture equipment ready.”

* * *

Half an hour was all it took for Shuu to prepare everything.

Charcoal briquettes that have been set on fire, metal skewers and a set of metal tongs. A bowl of water at the side to clean off any dirty material.

”Would you like me to perform the acts?” Shuu offered.

”No,” Ken said, his voice monotone. “Leave him to me. Stop me if I’m not out within two hours.”

”Yes, sir.” Shuu said as he left the dungeons.

Ken could definitely tell the boy was afraid. The shivers and trembling, the sweat dripping down his forehead, and his heavy breathing.

”It’s your last chance,” Ken whispered. “Tell me all the information you have and I’ll let you go peacefully and painlessly.”

The boy remained defiant.

Ken smiled beneath his mask. He preferred it that way. It had been quite a while since he was able to do something like this.

Using the tongs, he picked up one of the red glowing charcoals and brought it up to the boy's knee. Without any warning, he pressed it firmly into the flesh.

The sizzling of flesh and the disgusting scent that clogged his nostrils seemed lost when he heard the screams of agony. Oh, how he relished the screams of his enemies. It was like music to his ears.

He removed the charcoal and bent down to meet the boy’s eye level.

”Look at you,” He whispered darkly. “In all this pain. Wouldn’t it be much better to tell me everything and free yourself from this agony?”

The boy shook his head frantically, his jaw clenched as he tried to endure the pain on his knee. The flesh had been cooked thoroughly, almost to the point of burning.

”No?” He chuckled darkly. “You want more? I’ll give you more if that’s what you want. You asked for this yourself.”

* * *

As ordered, Shuu had come down to bring Ken back up after two hours.

To say that what was done to the boy was horrific would be an understatement.

His legs had so many burn marks that they could be compared to burnt wood. His arms had tiny holes from being pierced with the skewers, and half his teeth had been forcibly pulled out using the metal tongs.

When Shuu had come for Ken, the boy was already in tears, a puddle of his own sweat surrounding the chair and his wrists rubbed raw from his restraints.

He had broken down right as Shuu came down and told him everything. From his name to what they were doing.

”See?” Ken drawled. “That wasn’t so bad, was it? You could have saved yourself two hours of pain if you said so earlier.” He cleared his throat. “As promised, I’ll send you on your way quickly and peacefully.”

The boy looked up hopefully, his mouth open in disbelief.

And in a split second, his head had been crushed just like his comrades’ hadn’t been.

”I did not say how I would send you on your way, did I?” Ken muttered darkly as he watched his paw shift back to being his human hand.

“What information did he provide you with, sir?” Shuu asked hesitantly. It was during times like this when he feared the king.

”His name is Hajime Hazuki, age fifteen, the leader of a group known as Oggai,” Ken muttered. “They’re filled with children who want to assassinate the current kings for how we, somehow, destroyed their parents or families. He doesn’t know who originally started the group. Apparently, he joined for wanting revenge against me because his father, a late butler, perished in the fire fifteen years ago, leaving his mother alone to raise him on her own.”

Ken scoffed, then chuckled bitterly. "As if it was my fault that the fire started in the first place. His father's death was not my fault. And, at the very least, he still had a mother to care for him."

"My King..." Shuu started.

"It is in the past," Ken said. "Don't bother with it."

Shuu knew better than to attempt to comfort his king now, so he remained three steps behind him as they walked back to the main parts of the castle.

”Breakfast is ready.” Shuu said.

”Mm,” Ken mumbled, feeling a strange emotion that consisted of anger, sadness, and satisfaction. “I shall take my breakfast, then.”

* * *

His heart felt... heavy.

That was the conclusion he came to as he walked towards his office. 

In fact, everything felt heavy. His shoulders felt as if they were sagging despite him straightening his back, and he felt as if his cloak was dragging him in the opposite direction. Hell, even his mask felt like it was contorting his face to look like a bull dog’s.

He just didn’t really want to do much of anything today.

His lips pulled into a thin line as he stared at the small pile of papers sitting on his desk. Granted, it was a million times smaller than what he was originally doing months prior, and he knew that he could finish it within two hours. However, he just didn’t feel like it. His feather quill felt like an iron ball in his lead hands.

Why?

He had never let his parents’ deaths affect him after the age of nine. Not even on their death anniversaries. Yet, at the mere mention of the fire that destroyed his and Hajime’s families, he just felt... heavy.

Was that it?

Was it because he felt sympathy and empathy towards a boy who attempted murder on him? To that, he said ‘bull dung’. He never felt sympathy for his enemies. He could slaughter a baby of Yamori’s and feel nothing.

Then, what was it?

Did he crave love? 

That couldn’t be it.

Parental love from his parents had long been forgotten, and he never once craved it in almost ten years. He had romantic love stemming from Touka and platonic love in the form of his higher ups, Hide especially.

Oh.

It was jealousy. He was jealous over a boy who had a mother caring for him as he grew up while his parents had both died in the fire.

That’s what he thought it was.

He shook his head to clear his thoughts. It wasn’t the time to think about trivial things. His kingdom and friends may be in danger now. That was his priority.

* * *

It was late afternoon—almost evening—when he had finished his work, after he had _finally_ decided to start on it. He had nothing else to do, so he decided to take out another book his mother had written.

He heard tapping noises. For three whole minutes.

When he had finally had enough and looked out of his window, he was stunned to see a hawk standing outside. Not just any hawk either. It was Amon’s hawk; Doujima.

Doujima was Amon’s personal hawk that he used to send letters by air. It was rare for Amon to even deliver any mail to him. If he was delivering mail, it was usually because something had happened.

The recent memory of his Head Butler’s rotting corpse fresh in Ken’s mind, he quickly tore open his window and reached for the little paper attached to the hawk’s leg and read its contents.

He almost wanted to slap himself for being in such a panic. Amon just wrote that he would be attempting to conceive a child with Queen Akira and that he was excited to be a father.

Ken shrugged. It was rather big news for Amon. 

He grabbed his quill and wrote a ‘good luck’ on the sheet of paper before tying it back to the hawk’s leg and sending it off.

As he sat back down on his chair, he lamented on the fact that he still did not have any heirs of his own. Every other king has an heir or have multiple heirs, or are about to have a child that will be their heir. And then, here he was, aged twenty one with no heir.

He had already decided that Touka would be the one to bear his children, but he didn’t want to push her into having children, and it would be her choice to remain in a relationship with him. He wouldn’t force her into anything.

Then came the troubling bit. If Touka were to reject him in the future, he would have to take a wife, likely a woman with high social standing from another kingdom. He just couldn’t see that as his future; being married to a woman he knew nothing about and bearing children with her. They would be strangers and he would never love her like he would love Touka.

His lips pulled into a straight line as he stared at the book on his table. A book that was written by a parent.

Would he ever be one?

His thoughts faded into the back of his head when Touka had entered the room, with his usual cup of tea.

As she smiled at him and made her way towards his desk, he stared at her, picturing her as a mother. 

She would make a good one, in his opinion.

As she set his cup of tea down on his table, he slowly rose from his seat, starting a slow walk towards her. He dwarfed her in height and soon she had to crane her neck upwards in order to maintain eye contact with him.

He knew she could tell what was happening when her eyes glanced down towards his hand, which was unravelling the string that tied his mask to his face.

”Touka...” He murmured as his mask fell to the floor next to him.

Being next to her was a safe haven for him. She was the only one that he felt comfortable with when he had to remove his mask, willingly or unwillingly.

Their lips met softly at first. Ken didn’t want to overwhelm her with his desires, but his resolve and will were crumbling apart by the second.

His hand rose to place itself on the back of her neck to press her closer to his lips. He was already succumbing to his desires, and for some reason, he didn’t really mind.

Within seconds, he had her pressed against the wall, his elbows on either side of her head as he nibbled on her bottom lip, smiling slightly when she had parted her lips for him.

Soon, it became a battle for dominance between their tongues. Her hands were on his shoulders when he hoisted her up higher, craning his neck to meet her lips. He had wrapped her legs around his waist and she seemed to have no objection towards that.

He broke apart from the kiss to murmur tiny kisses down her chin then to her neck. Her body shivered slightly when his lips had found her pulse line and she let out a soft moan when he suckled on it gently.

Her skirt was in the way. That was the only thing his mind focused on as he pushed the thick fabric back to get her even closer to his body.

”Touka...” He whispered breathily. She was like an alcoholic drink he had gotten addicted to. He just couldn’t get enough of her.

Seeing that she wasn’t resisting him in the slightest, and that she seemed to be eager in her actions. He muttered a single word that they both silently agreed on.

”Bedroom.”

* * *

His hips thrusted lazily on their own for a few times as he shuddered above her, his seed emptying itself into her.

He collapsed on top of her, both hands on either side of her head. His breathing was heavy next to her ear. He was absolutely exhausted from their activities.

Her hands reached up to pat his sweaty hair softly, a comforting action to him because she had been pulling on his hair earlier.

Before he could doze off, he rolled over to his side to look at the woman next to him. Her face was flushed and her hair was stuck to her face.

Simply put, she looked absolutely gorgeous.

”Are you okay?” He whispered softly, brushing the sweaty locks of hair away from her face. He had been a little rough on her for their first time.

Apparently, he wasn’t the only one feeling tired. Touka looked ready to sleep for eternity.

”Mm...” She murmured. “I’m fine...”

She rolled over, her back facing him as she curled up slightly.

Ken frowned. Did she regret it?

He came up behind her, his chest pressed to her back and he wrapped an arm around her waist. He buried his head into her hair.

”Did you regret it...?” He reluctantly asked. If she did, he felt guilty. Guilty that he had pushed her into something like this.

Her answer was immediate. “Why would I? There’s no reason for me to regret anything.”

He sighed into her hair. It was a sigh of contentment. She didn’t regret any bit of it.

It wasn’t long before the two of them dozed off.

* * *

It was a few weeks later when Ken received the letter that detailed where the next Kings’ Meeting would be held. Sometimes he wondered why the information would be sent months prior to the meeting. Why couldn’t it be sent a few weeks prior to the actual meeting?

He had hoped that the next meeting would take place in Kingdom CCG or Kingdom Anteiku, or even his own kingdom.

Of course, fate was not kind to him. The selected location had been Kingdom Washuu.

The Kings’ Meeting location was usually determined in terms of damage done to the kingdom. Kingdom Aogiri had been damaged financially and socially (obviously Yamori’s fault), so the latest Kings’ Meeting had taken place there.

They had discussed matters of how to solve the said issues in Kingdom Aogiri, because all five kingdoms had to have a balance in all of their issues, be it socially, economically, or politically. This was done to, apparently, ensure all the kingdoms were standing on equal footing of war broke out.

In all honesty, Ken had laughed at that idiotic rule when he first heard of it. Why would any kingdom want to aid another if they were going to wage war against them? 

Then again, if any king failed to follow the rule, the others would see him as a failure of a king. Two things could happen; propaganda from other kingdoms to encourage citizens to leave their home kingdom, or the other kings would hire assassins against the opposing king. Due to the fact that they see him unfit to be king, they would kill him, then have the citizens of the kingdom elect someone else as king within the castle.

As much as he despised Yamori, he could not afford to have any of these happen to him. He would not destroy the kingdom that his father had worked so hard to allow it to prosper.

Without another word, he had torn up the little sheet of paper and tossed it into the flames. It was only a letter for his acknowledgement. Nothing more.

He stared into the flames for a few moments before directing his attention towards the window, surprised to see little white flakes falling from the skies. It had been so warm in his office that he had forgotten it was already winter time.

When he looked down, he was further surprised to find that a layer of snow had already covered the ground. How long had it been snowing for?

The question didn’t remain for long, as he noticed some of the servants had poured out to play in the snow. Even though they were already adults, it never hurt to relive some childhood memories of playing in the snow.

He didn’t fail to notice Touka playing in the snow. He expected it, really. When they were children, she would go out to play in the snow all day and would be upset once the snow melted when spring came along.

He enjoyed the snow as well when he was younger. He would make snow angels in the snow and frolick around with his parents, and later on, Touka after he had been found by her.

Snow was an enjoyable thing for him. It still is, but he seldom had the time nor energy for that during winter. His joints would cramp up and he would struggle to move around. His position made it embarrassing to play and his wolf form made it inconvenient.

Basically, no fun for him until nobody else is in sight.

He shook his head, returning back to his work. He’d have to wait a while more.

He was always good at waiting, anyways.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> y’all who read the original know what’s coming up soon ahahaha... I’m not sorry. And so far the vampire AU seems to be the one you guys like most.


	20. Increasing Danger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter takes place after a few months of time skip

The past few months of Ken’s life had been his happiest. He had a large reduce in stress and was reunited with a woman he loved, and now he had a steady and strong romantic relationship with her.

However, a few of those months had been stressful. His soldiers reported more children hiding in their barracks and attempting to murder them. Twenty soldiers had reported these cases over the last few months. Fifteen of them had been injured in a failed attempt of the children killing them. Five of them had died.

The last death happened three months before he was scheduled to go to his next Kings’ Meeting. Since then, he had ordered for more soldiers and more fortified barracks as well as traps to hold some of the child assassins hostage.

In three months, the traps only caught two young children at different timings. He had tortured each child for the information he wanted, then killed them in cold blood. 

Ken was seriously starting to wonder if the responses they gave were the standard response to give in the event of being caught, as all three he had tortured had provided him with near identical information; they were orphans seeking to assassinate the kings who had wronged their families.

No matter about thinking about it now. He had to attend to the Kings’ Meeting, held in Kingdom Washuu this year, despite it being a few months earlier than usual.

When he had stepped off his carriage, he was shocked to see King Tsuneyoshi having only less than half of his usual higher ups—also his sons and daughters—standing next to him.

Bells chimed in Ken’s head. Was this the reason why the location hadn’t been selected in Kingdom Washuu? Because the Washuu family had been and still is being killed off one by one? There was no answer now, but he would find one.

”Tsuneyoshi,” He greeted, head bowing slightly.

The old man’s eyebrows raised and he gave a barely there smile. “Nameless King. I see your hair is changing colours.”

His hands flew to the back of his head. Was his hair really changing colours?

”T-Touka...?” He managed to call out.

She had heard King Tsuneyoshi’s words as well. She had to stand on her toes and he had to bend down slightly for her to see the crown of his head.

”Oh my...” She whispered. “I do see a small patch of black hair...”

To say he felt ecstatic was an understatement. So many years of having white hair and looking like an elderly person. He would finally be able to look a little younger.

He had to mask his happiness and remain professional, as he was still in public.

"To their rooms," Tsuneyoshi muttered to his nearest higher up. Ken didn't miss the way the old king stared at Touka. The strange disgust in the man's eyes was questionable to say the least.

Ken felt angry. What was so wrong if he had a relationship with a servant? At least he wasn’t having a forced relationship with his own sister or daughter. He gagged just thinking about it.

Nevertheless, he followed the older man—Matsuri, was it—to the room he would be given.

It was nothing new. He had been to Kingdom Washuu before, and he had stayed in this room, too.

Porcelain white in colour, his walls. The floor and ceiling a dark wood that smelled slightly musty. It had just been cleaned. A canopy over his bed and a portrait of King Tsuneyoshi when he was in his youth looking over it. The tables and chairs and nightstands were all made of the same dark wood. There were even small gold decorations.

To him, it was boring. He never understood why jewelry was so precious nor admired by many. Sure, it was pretty, and it was shiny, but there were so many things that were also pretty, and so many others that were shiny, too.

 _Like Touka_ , his mind whispered.

Yes. Like Touka, he agreed.

* * *

”I have lost five of my men in the last few months,” Ken said, voice monotone. “Witnesses have told me that the perpetrators were all children. I had my servants torture them for information, and they claimed they were part of an organisation that was exclusive to people who wanted death on the current kings.”

He wouldn’t reveal that he was the one who had tortured the children. He wouldn’t reveal that horrible, horrible side of him that loved to sadistically torture his enemies. He wouldn’t reveal. Ever.

“I have also lost my men to these wretched children,” Amon said. “One was even found completely skinned.”

”Same here.” Yamori commented.

Yoshimura said nothing. He chose to not speak of the horrors his kingdom had faced in the last few months.

Tsuneyoshi’s brows furrowed. “Your higher ups were not attacked?”

Ken’s visible brow raised. “No. Why would they attack our higher ups? They wouldn’t be so stupid as to attack specially trained people. They would rather target others to draw us out.”

A look of horror seemed to brush past Tsuneyoshi's face. "Then, why were my higher ups attacked?"

Ken thought about it. The children were seeking revenge on the ones who had wronged their families. He knew that the mother of one of the children he had tortured had screamed something about her being used as a 'toy for pleasure'. Perhaps...

"Tsuneyoshi," Ken suddenly said aloud. "If I may ask, have you and your higher ups procreated with any other women outside of the Washuu?"

The older man narrowed his eyes, but answered anyways. “...sometimes. My higher ups are given one woman each, and if they impregnate that woman, they are not allowed to engage in sexual intercourse with her to not harm the child within. I know my higher ups have exited the kingdom to bed with other women before... forcefully.”

It was expected, but Ken grimaced behind his mask. Did these men have no sense of shame? Royal family members forcing themselves on innocent women and impregnating her was one of the vilest acts of crimes that Ken heard from.

”You are aware that they may have impregnated the woman, yes?” He spoke slowly. “The child may know they were born as a product of... rape... and they may have wanted to seek revenge towards the men who harmed their mothers.”

The other kings listened intently as Tsuneyoshi cocked his head to one side. “Why would they? My men were the reason why they were alive. They should be grateful.”

The other kings shifted uncomfortably in their seats. Yamori even gave an amused smile.

Ken knew that Tsuneyoshi was not a king to be trifled with. The Washuus had large numbers of soldiers and could easily wipe down a separate kingdom if they wanted to. He chose not to state reasons why his higher ups’ actions were despicable and instead chose to mutter a simple “I do not know.”

Thankfully, the matter in regards to innocent women being raped was dropped as the kings continued to discuss the group of child assassins and how to stop them.

* * *

Touka found that there were more things to do in Kingdom Washuu than in Kingdom Aogiri; knitting was available, she was free to roam around the gardens, and the servants could talk to her and her other fellow servants, too.

Even the women the Washuu higher ups ‘owned’ could roam around until their masters came back.

She had managed to talk to one, and it had been a pleasant chat, until the conversation somehow steered into the topics of the Washuu higher ups.

”It’s a nightmare,” the woman, Ayano, said. “It happens every single day. We don’t get a single day of rest and it’s rare that any of them treat us like actual human beings.”

”A-Are there any that do?” Touka asked hesitantly. She hoped that she did not step in any thin ice territory. The last thing she would want was to offend this poor woman.

”In the years I have worked here as... a womb... I have seen only one man show acts of kindness to one of us,” She sighed. “She took advantage of him and escaped from this wretched hell. I would say that I felt sorry for him after seeing him so upset, but I would be lying if I said that. You would understand if your higher ups and king did this to you.”

Unfortunately, she didn’t. Ken was a kind king and a sweet lover to her. The nights they spent together was consented and loving, the complete opposite of what Ayano was describing her nights to be.

Touka kept her mouth shut. She knew better than to compare herself to Ayano in this situation.

”Ah,” Ayano said suddenly. “That higher up from Kingdom Aogiri—he looks a little like you—he was looking for you earlier today.”

Touka frowned. She definitely knew who Ayano was talking about. But, what could Ayato want with her?

“Did he mention anything?” She asked, immediately regretting it when she realised how stupid her question sounded.

Ayano frowned. “No, but he was muttering about finding you and saying something to you.”

Touka hoped that Ayato would be saying something with meaning to her. Their encounter last year had been awkward and filled with negative emotions, with neither of them being openly passive to the other.

”I suppose I will look for him after the meeting is over...” Touka muttered.

She wasn’t looking forward to their conversation, no matter what topic it might be about. Facing her younger brother was painful, to say the least. Sometimes, she would still get nightmares about that rainy night when he had left her.

But, she would do it. She would face him. She would face him as a form of respect to him and herself.

Who was she to deny him respect again?

* * *

Touka stayed in the same place after Ayano had scrambled off to meet her master after the meeting was over. The other woman had promised to let Ayato know where she was.

She waited. The dread in her heart felt heavy. Her heart ached slightly as she waited for her younger brother to show up.

Was this even a good idea?

She had no time to answer her own question, because at that very moment, her brother decided to show up in front of her.

”What did you want to talk to me about?” Touka asked, trying to keep the bitterness and nervousness out of her voice.

Her heart pounded against her chest. The dread of meeting him and the fear of what was to come out from his mouth was nearly overwhelming her entire being.

”...you—I...uh...” Ayato muttered. Seems as though he was more nervous than she was.

”Take your time.” She whispered gently, as she had always done when they were children and he was trying out something new.

Her brother’s lips pulled into a thin line before dropping slightly as he struggled to find the right words to speak to her.

”T-That night,” He finally said after some time. “I-I never gave you an e-explanation, did I?”

She didn’t need him to explain what he was talking about. How could she forget the night that terrorised her nightmares for years? How could she forget about the night which plagued her heart with constant worry over whether her brother was safe or not?

How could she forget the night where she hated herself for being such a horrible older sister?

She did her best to keep a straight face as she nodded her head.

In the few seconds before he spoke again, Touka noticed just how _tall_ he had grown. He was easily a whole head taller than her and she even had to crane her neck slightly to have eye contact with him.

 _He was no longer a child,_ the voice in the back of her head whispered.

“You remember, don’t you?” He said softly, so that she had to strain her ears to hear him. “How our father would go out for his... activities?”

She nodded again. The painful memories of pleading with her father to not leave them alone would be etched into her brain forever.

“The men who killed him,” He went on. “I heard that they were after us next, and that where they were located was in Kingdom Aogiri. I knew I couldn’t let them hurt us, so I... I did what I had to do.” He said. "O-On that night, when i said something like you were a horrible sister, I didn't mean it. I just needed an excuse to leave home and travel to Kingdom Aogiri."

"Why did you leave, then...?" She asked, her voice barely above a whisper even though she already knew the answer.

"To protect you." He answered without hesitation.

A part of her felt angry. She was the older sibling and was the one who needed to protect the younger sibling, not the other way around. However, another part of her felt touched that he did so to protect her. The pain he had caused her for so many years seemed to fade away a little after hearing his words.

"I'm sorry," He whispered, his large hand patting his sister's shoulder. "I can't take back all the pain I've caused you. I can never do that. I'm sorry."

Somehow, she managed to forgive him.

* * *

Though the reconciliation had been a happy one, Touka found herself grimacing when she had to prepare dinner.

When she had stepped into the kitchen to  prepare dinner, her eyes had landed on the women from Kingdom Washuu. 

Her ears would bleed tonight.

She pitied them, though. She really did. Their pale skin and dark eye circles were more than enough to tell her that the women were not getting enough sleep due to having to please their masters.

It sickened her last time, it will sicken her again and continue to until the day she died.

Dinner went by without much trouble, and Touka was happy that none of the Washuu had come down to demand their food come faster like last time.

After she had served the kings and their higher ups, she went to join the other servants for dinner.

It wasn't anything fancy, but Touka enjoyed the meal of poached chicken breast, roasted broccoli, and a hot potato on the side. She even managed to have a fun conversation with all of the other servants while eating. 

Soon, she found herself preparing for bedtime, making sure to have enough space on one side of her pillow so she could fold the other side over her ear.

She still had a few minutes before all the servants were due to sleep, so she decided to wander the castle a little. She had never visited Kingdom Washuu before, so this was a good opportunity to explore the large castle.

The level of grandness was the same as Kingdom Goat’s castle. It was made almost entirely out of white marble that had been polished so much that she could see a blurred reflection of herself.

She stood by a balcony in the castle, her arms on the short barrier in front of her, watching the night stars. The skies were clearer than the skies in Kingdom Goat, she noticed.

Her sensitive ears picked up on footsteps approaching her, and it wasn't long before she held a pair of arms around her waist and warmth envelope her entire being.

”You always do this,” She sighed, not bothering to turn around.

”Why are you here?” He whispered into her ear, ignoring her statement. “Shouldn’t you be in bed by now?”

Touka huffed, trying not to be too affected by the shiver that just ran down her spine. “I really don’t feel like sleeping.”

”And why is that?” His husky voice whispered.

She wiggled slightly in his arms to face him. “You know why. They’re always too... loud and gross.”

”You’ll need a distraction, then.” He muttered. “Why not I help you with that?”

Before his lips had even touched her neck, she already knew what he was suggesting. And who was she to deny this when she benefited greatly from this as well?

"Come on," He purred, slowly leading her to his bedroom.

* * *

It was the middle of the night when Touka was rudely awakened from her peaceful slumber.

She had been sleeping so well, unable to hear any of the sickening noises until she heard someone outside screaming for help.

In an instant, she had wiggled herself out of Ken's arms to put on her uniform. Ken had wrapped a simple robe around his body before the both of them ventured outside his bedroom.

The scent of blood had punched them both in the face the moment the opened the door. Servants were running down the hallways, some panicking whilst others were trying to see what had happened.

"Murderer in the castle!" a servant screamed. "Murderer in the castle!"

Upon hearing those words, they had bolted towards the direction the servants and other kings were fleeing to.

It was King Tsuneyoshi's room. It was also the room where the scent of blood was the strongest. 

The metallic scent of the blood was all that Touka could register in her head by now. She watched as Ken travelled into the old king's room, then come out a moment later looking ready to throw up his dinner.

"He's been murdered," Ken whispered to her. "Three of the swords he had kept in his room were stabbed into his head. Eight knives were impaled through his body."

Touka shuffled nervously on her feet. She had never really reacted well when it came to blood.

"Oh, no!" A voice cried. "Father is dead!"

Ken had turned to see one of the Washuu higher ups covering his hands over his mouth. Kichimura Washuu, he recognised. He had never really liked the man. Kichimura was strange; always giggling to himself and smiling at the most unnecessary timings. In fact, he was sure that Kichimura was actually hiding a smile behind his hands.

"The kings are no longer safe here," Amon grunted as he appeared next to Ken. "If the castle had been infiltrated with all of our defences here, then it's safe to say that none of us are safe in this castle anymore."

"Well, what can we do?" Yoshimura said gravely. "The Kings' Meeting still has to go on about what we can do to prevent these. And it wouldn't be safe for any of us to leave the castle, knowing that the murderer is likely still out there somewhere, possibly waiting for another one of us kings to strike down."

"But we would all face the threat of death if we stay here!" Yamori protested. Even he had grown scared over the killings in the last few months.

Ken shook his head. "We finish the meetings. If no one else has been killed in the next few days, we can deem it safe for us to return back to our own individual kingdoms. Until then, I propose that all of us share a single room so that, if the murderer were to appear again, all of us can be ready to catch the killer in the room."

Nobody objected to this. They just wanted the safest possible way of surviving the next few days without any more bloodshed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have the name for the Vampire AU: Nonexistent Heartbeat.


	21. Accusations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slightly faster update I guess? Enjoy the newest chapter because there is some blood included :D

The new accommodation was changed a little upon attempting to move the beds into the largest room in the castle.

Since the main targets of the murderer would be the kings and their higher ups, it was decided that the servants would continue to stay in their rooms while the kings and higher ups shared a single room for maximum protection.

The Washuu women seemed happy with this arrangement. They would be sleeping in individual rooms now that their masters have to stay in a single room with everybody else.

While Touka was fine with this arrangement, Ken had insisted that she not wander around the castle without him, out of fear that the murderer may know about their relationship and use her against him.

Which is why when Touka was busying herself with preparing breakfast the next day, Ken was standing outside of the kitchen, occasionally checking inside to make sure nothing had happened.

A part of Touka thought that this was insanely annoying and that he had no reason to protect her since she would not be considered a valuable target. The other part of her argued that at least Ken was worried about her and looking out for her safety.

The second part of her won out. She was honestly touched that he would go through with this just to ensure that she would be safe in the castle.

Unfortunately, Ken wasn’t the only one who was watching her like a hawk in this castle. She had to deal with her brother, too.

In fact, he was the first one to finish his meal, then he ran off to stand outside of the room where the servants would take their meals. She knew this because she hadn’t realised his presence outside the door and almost had a heart attack when she saw him standing outside.

Again, she found this annoying. She already had one man treating her like a child and she didn’t need a second one—one that was younger than her—to do the same. She was a woman who was more than capable of protecting herself.

She loved the both of them very, very much and was touched by their actions to protect her. But, if she was being honest with herself, she would wring their necks if they got even more clingy in the next few days.

* * *

”Seriously, Ken,” She sighed. “I can take care of myself, nobody will be in the gardens anyways. Besides, why would someone be targeting a _rabbit_ in an open field when they have four kings in the castle?”

The man behind her said nothing, only continuing to follow her as she made her way into the gardens.

”Besides, do you not have a meeting to attend?”

”It’s in two hours,” He replies smoothly. “I have time to be with you.”

 _More like stalk me_ , Touka thought bitterly.

Somehow, she didn’t really believe him. That was until she caught Ayato staring at her from one of the windows in the castle. If he wasn’t attending a meeting, then there really was no meeting.

Running from Ayato was easy. He wouldn’t go near her when Ken was nearby. Running from the latter, however, was impossible, to say the least. He could smell her out easily.

 _Damn the soap I use_ , she cursed. He had it all memorised.

“You know,” She said slowly. “The more you follow me around, the more likely that murderer is going to target me.”

She could practically feel the man behind her stiffen.

”They may already know,” He said, a nervous tone hinted in his voice. “What if they can smell you? They’ll have already detected you on my body. Whether I’m with you or not doesn’t change a thing until we catch this murderer or murderess.”

She remained silent, not having any remark or rebuffing words in her arsenal to combat what he had just said.

”Besides,” He went on, walking a little faster to catch up to her and scoop her tiny rabbit body into his hands. “It’s rare that we can spend time together when I’m constantly in long and boring meetings.”

”You’re spending time with me now, aren’t you?” She murmured.

”It isn’t the same. You’re a rabbit now and too small to hug.”

Touka grinned internally. She would have fun toying with him.

She hopped off his arms and took off at full speed, making sure to zig zag her path occasionally to give him a harder time catching her.

”Touka!” He yelled.

She was fully intent on continuing her path forward when something in front of her made her stop dead in her tracks. 

A man was about fifteen metres away from her, hair covering his left eye. She recognised this man as the one who had screamed for his father, King Tsuneyoshi, the night before.

Normally, a random person standing there wouldn’t have distracted or stopped her in any way. However, this man was just... staring. All he did was stare at her with this hungry look in his eyes, like he would be choosing her for his next meal.

It unnerved her to say the least.

She had ran so fast that Ken was several metres behind her, still running. Though her ears picked up on the sound of pressure being applied on the grass—a fact that usually made her feel safe—she felt everything but safe.

The man’s face was stone cold in the beginning when she first noticed him, but his lips quirked upwards slightly, and lifted higher and higher by the second until he was smiling at her like a how a psychopath would.

The blood in her veins seemed to have froze over when the man started _laughing_. It wasn’t the happy kind of laugh that you would hear if someone was laughing at something funny or cute, rather, it was the kind of laugh that belonged to an insane person. A laugh that belonged to the most insane kind of person.

Moving her muscles felt like moving three tons of bricks. She was scared. This man was dangerous.

”Kichimura,” A voice behind her spoke darkly. She almost jumped from the sudden voice, having almost forgotten that Ken had been with her. “What are you doing here?”

The man had ceased his creepy laughing as though he had never started it to begin with. “What do you mean?” He quipped in a more serious tone.

Ken had stepped over Touka’s little body in an attempt to hide her from the man in front of them. “Are you not supposed to be determining with your peers which Washuu is to be the next king of this kingdom?”

“Aw...” Kichimura whined. “You really want me to go? But it’s so boring! And all of us already know who is going to be the next king!”

Touka hated how he spoke with a high pitched voice. It made him sound like a child, which added to his supposed insanity.

”And who might that be?” Ken asked slowly. He didn’t let his guard down. Kichimura was highly unpredictable in any way, shape or form.

”Of course, my beloved half brother; Matsuri Washuu!”

Ken blanched behind his mask. He had never really liked any of the Washuus, but Matsuri was one of the men who he actually despised. The man was cold hearted and unfriendly, like a human iceberg.

He vaguely remembered seeing Matsuri punch one of the servants for being late to serve something by a mere few seconds. He even remembered being a little boy, and facing Matsuri’s cold eyes that looked at him like he was a cockroach.

Needless to say, he would not be fond of the current king.

”Good choice,” He managed to say, even though his thoughts were completely contradicting what he said.

”Precisely!” Kichimura chirped. “His reign will bring more protection to our kingdom! Matsuri always trains the best soldiers in this kingdom, you know?”

No, Ken did not know and he did not care.

He waited. Waited for the freak of a man in front of him to waltz off like an idiot before bending down to check on Touka.

”Are you alright?” He whispered, petting her head slightly.

Now, it was a fact that he couldn’t read the facial expressions of animals very well, but he knew well enough that Touka was rather shaken up. Her body was not trembling, but her beady eyes were slightly wide.

”Touka?” Ken asked worriedly.

She shook her head before shifting back into human form.

”What a freak...” She murmured, feeling a chill go down her spine.

”Ignore him,” Ken said. “We don’t know what he would do if we provoke him.”

* * *

Ken never liked Tsuneyoshi, but he sure as hell would prefer the old man than Matsuri.

Matsuri was glaring at him, even though he had done nothing wrong. His glare was cold, like his personality.

”Is something the matter, Matsuri?” Amon asked, seemingly sensing Ken’s discomfort. “You’ve been staring at the Nameless King for quite some time.”

Matsuri’s face twisted ever so slightly before he forced a smile at Amon. “Have I? I didn’t notice.”

So obviously a lie, yet nobody mentioned anything else. Why? Because everyone was too focussed on trying to stay alive.

”What should we do?” Yoshimura asked softly. “Kingdom Washuu has one of the best defences that we know of, and the murderer managed to sneak inside to kill the previous king of Kingdom Washuu.”

”That’s where you’re wrong,” Matsuri said firmly. “None of my men were killed. None of my men reported sightings of anybody attempting to break into the castle. And none of the wolves reported any other scent other than the ones in the castle.”

That was true. None of Ken’s higher ups had even whispered to him about a new person present in the castle.

”So, you are suggesting that the murderer is within the castle?” Ken asked. 

Matsuri’s eyes widened slightly, as if he couldn’t believe a man younger than himself was capable of thinking the same way as him.

”Yes,” He said, clearing his throat. “And this is also reason to believe that this killing has high probability of not being related to the recent killings of our soldiers and higher ups.”

”The question now is; who is the murderer?” Yamori said.

”Your alibis?” Amon immediately asked, his hands firm on the table in front of him. “I was with my wife in our room. I can bring her up here for proof, if you need me to.”

”I was writing a letter to my person in charge while I am here.” Yoshimura said.

”I was discussing matters with my soldiers to be on guard for the rest of the night and that nobody is to sleep.” Matsuri grunted.

”My... woman and I were in my bedroom.” Ken said. There really wasn’t another word he could have thought about in that situation.

Yamori cleared his throat. “I was in my quarters, admiring my jewelry.”

Matsuri immediately stood up. “At what time?”

The blonde man’s eyes darted to his right for a moment. “I believe it was around half-past midnight?”

Matsuri’s eyes were immediately burning holes into Yamori. “You lie.”

”Excuse me?”

”My father was murdered ten minutes past midnight. I know for a fact that all of us were present when we discovered his body ten minutes later, including you. And you never returned to your quarters.” Matsuri growled.

Now, Yamori stood up. “Did you not take into account that I may have not remembered the time? Or that my body would have blood on it after I ‘murdered’ the previous king? Or that any of you idiotic wolves could smell out blood?”

”No,” Matsuri admitted. “But the ten minute interval would be more than enough for you to wash your body and discard your clothing in the fireplace.”

”Just because there was a possibility doesn’t mean I would do it!” Yamori barked.

The other three kings looked on with worry. If this matter was not resolved, war could break out between the two kingdoms.

”King Yamori and King Matsuri,” Yoshimura suddenly called, silencing the two men. “If we really want evidence, we will have to search for it. Why not we have our servants search every fireplace in the castle?”

Matsuri huffed through his nose, rapidly glancing between Yamori and Yoshimura before sitting down again, seemingly satisfied with this outcome. Yamori sat down, too, also seemingly satisfied.

”Hide,” Ken whispered. “Get the five servants to search. Get the other servants in the castle to search as well if they were not informed in time.”

”Yes, sir.” Hide said before rushing out of the door.

”Well?” Matsuri suddenly barked at his higher ups. “You lot also go search!”

His higher ups scrambled to the door and frantically pushed it open, not wanting to test their new king’s patience.

Now, they had to play the waiting game. If Ken was being honest, it was the most awkward and tense moment of his entire life so far.

Two kings were glaring heatedly at each other, as if they were clashing with each other using their eyes. The tension between the two was so thick he was sure he could slice it with a knife.

The other three did not dare to speak a word, out of fear that if slight movement was detected by the other two, their heads would be off in an instant.

It felt like an eternity had passed before a servant had burst through the door, sweat pouring down her face.

Matsuri and Yamori immediately stood, both snapping their heads towards the servant.

”Well?” They both shouted.

The servant pressed her back to the door, allowing for a second servant to come in. He held a burnt, white wool tunic that was large in size.

”We found this in the fireplace of King Yamori’s room,” The first servant admitted.

”That doesn’t confirm anything,” Yamori snapped. “Bring it here. If the shirt belongs to me, it’ll have my kingdom’s flag on it.”

The servant holding the shirt stiffened as he turned it over, revealing Kingdom Aogiri's flag on the back of the tunic.

"That's impossible!" Yamori screamed. "I never kill anybody! This was a set up by someone!"

Ken almost pinched his nose. The scent of burnt cloth was rather strong for him, but he kept his hand away from his nose because he was sure he smelled something on the shirt.

"I smell blood." He said.

"That's all the evidence we need," Amon growled, standing up and facing Yamori. "The burnt clothing, blood scent, and faulty timings you have given us are more than enough to identify you as the murderer of King Ysuneyoshi."

"Like hell it is! I never killed him and I wouldn't have dared to anyways!" Yamori shouted. “If I were going to assassinate a king, I’d have killed the Nameless King myself!”

”You vile boar!” Ken screeched. “Because you failed to kill me last year, you’ve bared your fangs towards King Tsuneyoshi!?”

”ENOUGH!” Yamori exclaimed as he attempted to flee out the door, pushing past the servants and causing a few of them to fall flat on their bottoms.

The hallway was clear of anybody. Yamori could go wherever he wanted to if he was fast enough. He just needed to make up his mind about which direction he had to go and be fast eno—

His body was pressed flat against the floor and he groaned in pain. He struggled to turn his head, and when he finally did he was shocked to find a large paw pinning him to the floor.

”You are to be assassinated for your crime,” A large lion spoke. It was Amon. “To attempt assassination on a king, then brutally murder another is unacceptable.”

Yamori writhed beneath the large paw, still futilely attempting to get away.

”He doesn’t understand, does he?” Amon sighed. “Nameless King, the legs.”

Oh, he had been waiting for this moment for his entire life. The moment when he could finally inflict such a high level of pain on Yamori that would cause him to scream to high heaven.

Ken unsheathed the sword he kept at his waist, his ears picking up on the hollow metallic sound that came when his sword was unleashed. Finally.

With a quick and clean cut, he had sliced off both of Yamori’s legs.

”BASTARD!” The man screamed, tears rolling down his face from the intensity of the pain. “YOU WILL ALL PAY FOR THIS WHEN YOU ALL BURN IN THE DEEPEST PITS OF HELL!”

”Drag him to the guillotine!” Matsuri barked. “This man will do us no more harm once his head rolls down to a silver platter!”

Yamori was much too heavy and bulky for a single servant to move him. Seven more had to aid the first in dragging the leg less king down the stairs.

While being dragged, Yamori screamed for his higher ups. 

“WHAT ARE YOU LOT DOING?!” He shouted. “YOU ALL KNOW THAT I AM INNOCENT. STOP THEM THIS INSTANT!”

None of them moved. If there was movement from his higher ups, it was to prevent the ones that were completely loyal to him from reaching the wretched king.

They dragged him into a private room in the dungeons of the castle. A room with a guillotine that was used specifically for private beheadings.

Even with two legs sliced off and in intense pain, Yamori still struggled when they tried to lock his head and hands into place. Amon and Ken had to step in to hold his hands down in order to secure his position right below the guillotine.

”ALL OF YOU WILL ROT IN HELL!” He screamed. “MISFORTUNE WILL BEFALL ALL OF YOU! MARK MY WORDS, THE DEVIL IS ON MY SIDE!”

Silence ensued when the blade dropped.

It was quiet. So quiet that everybody present in the room could hear the wet dropping noises that came from the head that tumbled to the floor.

Matsuri picked up the fallen head, inspecting it closely.

Even when dead and bodiless, Yamori still had a look of rage in his eyes and outrage etched into his features.

* * *

”Two kings dead in two days,” Yoshimura sighed. “I wonder who the next king of Kingdom Aogiri will be.”

Ken nodded his head in silent agreement. Watching Yamori’s death was satisfying and joyful for him, but now his depressing kingdom needed a new king.

The new king could be one of Yamori’s children, or it could be someone else who took over the throne by force.

He hoped that whoever would be taking position as the next king would be a far less malevolent and more benevolent king than Yamori.

Kingdom Aogiri had suffered enough in the hands of Yamori. Perhaps, the new king would bring more happiness to the kingdom.

Those were Ken’s thoughts as he slowly walked back to his bedroom. With the murderer finally caught, there was no need for the kings and higher ups to share a single room now. He would be going back to his own room.

Touka was already inside when he entered the room. She was staring out the window.

”It’s still a little bright,” He murmured, pressing his chest against her back and wrapping his arms around her waist. “What are you looking at?”

She shook her head and gave a small smile. “No, I’m just happy thinking that Kingdom Aogiri will be getting a new king now. I do hope the new king will be kinder. The children there aren’t growing well...”

Ken nodded his head before placing his chin on the crown of her head.

”I hope so, too.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hmmm... I’m thinking of changing Goodbye’s name to Fidelis once I rewrite it. It apparently means ‘faithful’ in Latin. If y’all read it y’all already know what the plot is about.
> 
> And to any of you who follow the manga very closely. I know Matsuri is Tsuneyoshi’s grandson but I’m too lazy to include his actual father, Yoshitoki, in this fanfic.


	22. Health Complications

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y’all, TG:re season 2 episode 7 was kinda disappointing from all the shot they cut out, but I was so happy that they animated 125. THE HANDS.

A funeral for the late King Tsuneyoshi was held, but a funeral for the late King Yamori was not. Despite Naki demanding that his king be given a proper burial, too, Matsuri refused, stating that people who were beheaded were not to be given a proper burial for the sins they have done to end up being held in the guillotine.

Ken knew his words were complete _rubbish_. He had beheaded some of the vilest people in his kingdom before and allowed the relatives of the beheaded to bury them in the right way. Heck, he had even seen King Tsuneyoshi behead someone publicly, and also give them proper burials. Matsuri just didn't like Yamori.

"We have another king in mind if this were to happen," Naki had said in between sobs after his initial outrage about Yamori. "He'll be taking over the throne once we get back home. He won’t be as good of a king as King Yamori, though."

Ken blanched. Was Naki really that oblivious to everything, or was he just an idiot?

For now, he would put the former.

* * *

In the few weeks after they returned home from Kingdom Washuu, Touka felt a little strange.

Some strange emotion was swirling in her heart, one that she couldn’t identify.

Maybe she was just worried for the children in Kingdom Aogiri. She had hoped that their new king would be kinder towards them. Hopefully, her hope would come true.

Now, she was in the kingdom’s market, eyeing the vegetables available.

Carrots and cabbages would be fine for her, but she would also need some meat in her diet. She couldn’t survive on vegetables along despite how good they tasted.

She turned towards the butcher after paying five copper coins for her vegetables. 

The butcher had many kinds of meats available; cow ribs, pork ribs, chuck tenders from both animals, chicken wings and a whole lot more.

”Welcome, missy,” The butcher said kindly. “What kinda meat are ye lookin’ fer? I’ve got plenty in stock.”

She gave a smile. “Let me make up my mind first. There’s so many options to choose from that I can’t really decide.”

”Aye, missy,” The butcher chuckled. “Me shop ‘as been called the best in the kingdom. Take yer time and look around. No rush.”

Touka nodded in thanks as she continued to browse the different selections of meats available. She wanted a large cut, so that she could cook it and save a bit for some sandwiches or something. And because she felt hungry today.

”That one,” She said, pointing at a cut of pork. It was rather large, almost able to take up the whole space in her basket.

”Aye, missy.” The butcher said cheerfully. He removed the cut of pork off the hook and wrapped it in a large sheet of paper before handing it to Touka. “Come again. Yer visits ‘ill always be appreciated.”

As she wandered around the market to look for anything else she might need, her mind flipped through various dishes she could make. She just wanted to gobble up the meat as soon as possible.

After one trip around the market, there was nothing else she wanted or needed, so she turned away from the market, and headed straight for the castle.

She quickly set her ingredients on the kitchen counter and prepared a meal. A simple meal of shallow fried pork chop and boiled vegetables. She ate it quickly.

There was not much for her to do in the castle, so she ended up assisting a few of the other servants with their work. She was just bored and it was a good way to pass the time.

About four hours later, she started feeling tired. She did do quite a bit of work, so there was no one else to blame for her fatigue than herself. It didn’t matter, she could rest it off with a short nap.

So, she did just that. She plopped herself on her bed in the servants’ quarters and closed her eyes.

Some time passed—she didn’t know how long—and she woke up. Feeling absolutely awful.

Her fatigue had been erased off the face of the earth, but a searing pain had jabbed itself into her head and her brain felt like it had melted into a liquid and was now swirling inside her head.

She would have probably marched towards the shop she had pitched her food from earlier and scream that their food was spoilt or had been infested with bugs. She would have done so, if she wasn’t feeling like she was stuck in a whirlpool.

She slowly sat up, feeling the swirling in her head get worse with every movement she made. A hand rose up to clutch at her throbbing and dizzy head as she shut her eyes tightly. What had been inside her food...?

”Touka?” A sweet voice called. “Are you alright?”

Her eyes fluttered open. It was Hinami in front of her.

”What’s wrong?” She managed to croak.

Hinami looked worried. “Well... you’ve been sleeping for about two hours... are you alright?”

Two hours. 

Touka almost gaped. Her naps never lasted that long before. Had she really been that tired?

”Maybe I was just tired,” she groaned. “I have a really bad headache and nausea now.”

The younger woman frowned, her tilt tilted slightly to her right. “Maybe some tea might help you? I can brew some for you, if you’d like.”

Tea didn’t sound like a bad idea for her headache, but her nausea was disagreeing.

”Sounds nice. Thank you.”

* * *

She should not have drank that tea.

It was brewed excellently. The flavour was strong and it was very fragrant. For a brief moment, she managed to enjoy the tea and her nausea and headache seemed to fly away.

Seemed to.

They came pummeling back into the back of her head a few seconds later, much worse than before.

In fact, it was so bad that Touka was hunched over the toilet now, heaving the contents of her stomach into the large hole under her. Some idiot had forgotten to rinse the damn toilet with water after use, so that just made everything worse for her.

“God,” She groaned. “What did I eat...?”

Hinami stood behind her, rubbing her back soothingly while holding back her hair.

”Maybe it’s just a stomach flu,” She suggested. “It’ll probably go away the next day.”

“I hope so...” Touka mumbled before retching into the toilet bowl again. Her throat burned and her eyes were tearing up.

It took a while, but she finally walked out from the toilet after basically throwing up her guts. Her nausea seemed to have faded, but her headache was still present.

”Is there more tea?” She managed after rinsing out her mouth.

Hinami smiled. "Of course."

* * *

It did not get better the next day. At all.

She had gone out to purchase ingredients needed for her meal again, going back to the same person who sold her vegetables to purchase them, just to see if they really were spoilt or not. She even went back to the same person who sold her the pork yesterday.

"Lass, back agin?" The man chuckled. "What cut are yer lookin' fer today?"

"A cut of beef, please. About the size of my arm." She said politely.

As the man unhooked a slice of beef from his racks, she eyed the hanging meats, wondering if they were fresh or not.

"Excuse me," She said. "If I may ask, are these meats fresh?"

The butcher seemed shocked that she would ask such a question. "'Course they are! Butchered them meself this mornin', I did! Was somethin' wrong with yer pork from yesterday?"

Touka frowned. "I don't think so. It tasted fine yesterday, but I experienced terrible dizziness and headaches after a few hours."

The butcher also frowned. "Well, I don't know what is causing yer illness, missy, but it sure as hell ain't my meats. They're fresh! Always fresh from this mornin'!"

She nodded her head, took the slice of beef, and walked away.

 _If the wasn't the pork that was spoilt and causing me to be sick, then it must be the vegetables_. She thought.

She was about to test that out by boiling the cabbage and broccoli she had purchased. If she felt sick after eating the vegetables, it must be that the person managing the shop was selling off spoilt food to their customers.

What horrible people.

However, even before she finished boiling the vegetables, her stomach lurched and she rushed off to the toilet, completely forgetting about the vegetables in the pot in favour for the bile that was rising up her throat.

It was even worse today. With nothing in her stomach, she was throwing up a strange yellow substance. Her stomach continuously lurched, causing her pain as more of the yellow liquid was emptied into the toilet.

Maybe Hinami was right. It was the stomach flu that was causing her to be like this.

After heaving practically nothing out of her stomach, she rinsed the toilet by pouring water down the hole, then rinsed her mouth with more water.

By the time she returned to the kitchen, her vegetables had been boiled so much that they became a little too soft for her liking.

She grimaced at the thought of eating soft vegetables. But, she wasn't the kind to waste food, so she just had to suck it up and eat it no matter how much she hated the over boiled vegetables.

Right as she was done washing the pots and plates she had used, Ken had sauntered down to the kitchen, a worried look evident in his visible eye.

She looked around the kitchen, watching as the other servants within the same room slowly turn their heads to look at their king.

The atmosphere in the room was rather awkward as she slowly made her way out of the kitchen, bowing her head slightly to Ken as she exited. She needed to do this as a form of respect, especially when other people were within the room.

Touka knew that Ken wanted to talk to her about something that was concerning him. He wouldn't be in the kitchen now if he wasn't looking for her. He also wouldn't have the worried look in his eyes if he was not concerned about something.

She ended up following him to his office.

"What's wrong?" He immediately asked.

She frowned, looking away. "What do you mean? I'm perfectly fine."

”Not you’re not. I can smell the bile.” 

Touka cursed. Damn him and his nose.

She sighed, then turned to face him. “Maybe I’ve caught the stomach flu. I should be fine in a day or two.”

”Do you need to see the doctor?”

Touka rolled her eyes. “No, Ken. I’m fine. It’s just the stomach flu and I’ll be fine in a few days. It’s nothing to worry about. If it continues, I’ll see the doctor myself.”

He was always worried about her wellbeing, she knew that well enough. But sometimes he would be so worried for her that he came off as... clingy. In a bad way. She knew her body inside and out, and didn’t need somebody else to be taking care of her body for her.

”I’m just worried,” He mumbled, walking closer to her. “There has been something...off about you ever since we left Kingdom Washuu.”

Touka raised her eyebrows. “Oh, really?”

He nodded. "You've been more...angry?"

An eyebrow fell as she stared at him with a questionable gaze. "Really?"

He nodded again. "You seem angrier about small issues."

Touka thought about it. She did kick a pile of leaves a few days ago for a reason she could not remember. But, she kicked leaves a lot for fun, even as a child.

”Can you give an example?”

”You were struggling to hang up the laundry a few days ago,” He said. “And after I asked what was wrong, you snapped at me to leave you alone.”

She remembered that. She didn’t know why hanging up the laundry was so irritable to her that day, because usually she wouldn’t feel much of anything when doing such simple tasks.

”I’m sorry.” She mumbled, her face heating up when she realised just how stupid she must have seemed that day.

She felt the rubber mask that he donned rub the crown of her head. “It’s alright. You were just a little angry that day.”

Touka kissed his cheek softly, watching with interest as his eye softened after she pulled away.

* * *

Her stomach flu didn’t go away after the next day, or the day after that, even after she had stopped buying from the people who sold her the meat and vegetables.

Ken had urged her to go to the local doctor, Ogura, and if the medicine the doctor prescribed to her would not cure her, then he would bring in— _drag_ —the royal doctor to examine her.

Now, she was sitting in the waiting room, waiting for her turn to meet the doctor.

There wasn’t anything for her to do in the waiting room. There were a few books on some of the shelves, but she lost complete interest when she saw that they were all literature books.

She stared at the floor for a while, staring at every little crack and crevice in the wooden floor. Some parts of the wood had little chips in them, and some would creak when she stepped on them.

Then, she looked up. The braces holding the ceiling up looked new, judging from the lack of imperfections within the wood.

She probably would have stared aimlessly at the ceiling for her entire waiting time, if the woman sitting next to her hadn’t spoken to her.

”What’re you here for?” She asked.

Touka turned to face the woman. She was a pretty lady, hair and eyes as dark as coal, and not a single scar on her face.

”Just here for a check up,” Touka replied, giving a smile. “I’ve been having a stomach flu recently, and I want to get it checked.”

The woman nodded her head. “I work in a brothel. My blood hasn’t been coming lately, and I’ve been throwing up my breakfast in the morning, so I wanted to know if a baby had gotten in me.”

Touka nodded her head slowly. She knew women who work in brothels would do regular check ups to ensure they were not pregnant, as that would complicate things in their career.

Then, her mind replayed the words the woman said. She had been vomiting in the morning, and her menstruation had been late, too.

Her whole body froze at the thought of being pregnant. 

She and Ken had always tried to be careful, but it wasn’t impossible that their occasional activities in the night would end up with them conceiving a baby.

A bead of sweat rolled down the Aiden of her face. What would Ken think? The mother of his heir was a low servant. How embarrassing and shameful would that be to the royal family?

She took a deep breath. It was only a stomach flu. She was overthinking this. The doctor would prescribe to her medicine to cure her current illness.

She wasn’t pregnant.

Somehow, the words in her head seemed hard to believe.

Time seemed to fly by too quickly when she was called into the doctor’s room.

She wanted to delay the confirmation, but why were her feet moving so fast and so eagerly?

”Sit.” Doctor Ogura told her, gesturing the to small wooden stool before him.

The check up room was rather spacious. There was a bed, though there was no mattress. Only a pillow and blanket. Shelves and cabinets full of used papers and jars of medicinal herbs were present. A water bowl next to the desk of the doctor.

”What seems to be the trouble?” He asked, not looking up from a piece of paper he was holding onto, likely about to take notes of what she would be describing to him.

”I suspect I have a stomach flu,” She said nervously, wringing her hands.

Ogura nodded. “Your symptoms for this suspicion?”

”Vomiting and fatigue.”

The doctor looked up for a brief moment. “And does your vomiting occur after every meal?”

”No. It only occurs in the morning, sometimes before I take my breakfast.” She replied.

Ogura reached over to the quill that had it’s tip in a bottle of ink, then jotted down what she had just told him.

He grunted softly before continuing, “You mentioned fatigue. Have you experienced anything else like headaches or nausea?”

”Yes. They’ve been rather frequent these days.” Touka said, feeling her stomach drop further with every word she spoke.

”Has your menstrual cycle been disrupted in any way?”

”...yes...it has not come this month.”

Ogura raised his eyebrows, then shut his eyes, blinking them a few times before looking up at her.

”Young lady, this is no stomach flu you are dealing with.” He said, seemingly a little tired. “I’m certain that you are with child.”

Touka felt as if she had just swallowed a boulder. This couldn’t be happening.

”I have one final question for you,” Ogura said. “Is the father—if you know who he is—from the predator or prey species?”

”H-He is from the predator species.” She replied shakily. Part of her was ecstatic about bearing a child with the man she loved dearly, but a large majority of her was panicking over the child—whose parents are a king and a maid—and how it was highly possible that they would be rejected as part of the royal family.

”Mm...” The doctor muttered. “And you are?”

”P-Prey...”

”All right. If your child takes after you and is a prey species, you will have cravings to consume greens,” He said. “If it takes after the father, a predator, you will have cravings to consume more meat. That concludes our meeting here. Three silver coins, please.”

She didn’t even remember taking out the coins before leaving, stunned and shocked beyond belief.

Pregnant.

She was pregnant.

* * *

Touka had always been good at acting in dire situations. This was one of them.

”What did the doctor say?” Ken asked nervously, as if her ‘stomach flu’ would kill her at any second.

She forced a smile, and hide the shaking in her voice. “Like I thought, it was a stomach flu. He just told me to avoid greasy foods and drink plenty of water.”

He let out a sigh of relief, completely oblivious to what she really had inside of her. “That’s good.”

Ken turned to face his desk, then held up a sheet of paper from his desk.

”It’s from Kingdom Aogiri,” He said. “The new king wants to introduce himself to the rest of us, starting with me.”

He read the letter again. “Apparently, he wants to apologise for all the trouble Yamori had caused me.”

The forced smile seemed plastered to her face. “Really? That’s nice of him.”

”Indeed. He seems like he would be a great king. His name is Shachi.”

Touka nodded her head. She had a look of absolute composure on the outside, but on the inside, she was screaming. 

Her heart pounded against her ribcage. It felt like her heart would snap her bones and just hop out of her body, then run off to god knows where.

”I’m going to go down to the kitchen,” She said. “Feeling a little hungry.

Ken frowned, but seemed fine with it. “Okay. I hope the stomach flu isn’t so bad today.”

”I hope so, too.” She said before sliding out the door. When she was certain that he could no longer hear her footsteps, she ran towards the kitchen. Nobody would be there during this time of day, so there was no way someone would walk in on her here.

Her hands flew to her flat stomach. Life had already taken root there.

When her eyes scanned the kitchen, they landed on a knife sitting on the kitchen counter. Some sick, twisted and disgusting part of her whispered to her. That she should just get rid of it. Save herself from the burdens of pregnancy and motherhood. Save the royal bloodline from shame.

She listened to those thoughts. Her eyes welled up and she felt her stomach lurch. How could these dark thoughts exist within her? How could she kill a baby, let alone her own baby?

How could she deny this child a life to live?

She needed to make a decision. Now.

An option for her was to remain in the castle, end up giving birth to the baby. When Ken finds out and declares the baby to be his, his family would suffer much shame for generations to come. Her child would not be accepted as the ‘proper’ heir to the current king. They would be rejected and shamed for their entire life.

Another option for her was to run. Run far away from this kingdom. Ken would never know of the pregnancy and would never know of his child. He would eventually take a wife from another kingdom and have children with her.

Her heart ached at the future that came with her second option. However, she could not allow her child to suffer such a painful fate. It would be better for her to leave, ensure that her child would not have to experience shame or painful rejection.

The second option was the best option possible, and it was the one she chose.

King Shachi visiting to introduce himself and take a look around the kingdom would be an advantage to her. Ken would be busy with the new king and she could use the time to take a carriage to a village near another kingdom.

But, she could easily be tracked down by smell.

She would need a new bar of scent soap, different from the one she usually used, and she would need new clothes. Maybe she would even purchase a wig or a hat to cover her hair to make sure nobody could identify her.

Nobody could know about this baby. Not because she didn’t want for people to know, but because it would benefit her, Ken and their baby the most.

It was for the best.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The original work of Following Your Scent had 65k+ words and 36 chapters. So far, the remake has 55k+ words and 22 chapters, and I’m only about halfway or slightly less than halfway through the entire plot. I’m proud of myself.
> 
> And this is the point in the plot where the angst starts >:D


	23. Desertion

It took three days for King Shachi to arrive. Three days of Touka struggling to not cry each time she talked to Ken. She had to pretend that everything was fine and that she wasn’t pregnant and wasn’t planning on running away. But she was.

The day before the new king arrived, Touka had bought a new set of clothes, a hat and a new bar of soap. She had to make sure that she was undetectable by the most powerful noses. She had even stuffed the trunk she had with most of her personal belongings, only leaving some in the open so that it wouldn't be blatantly obvious that she was leaving without notifying anyone.

The same day, during the night, she had allowed herself one more night with Ken. The last they would, probably, ever share with one another.

That night, the touches that would usually set her skin ablaze with passion had left a cold feeling on her. The kisses that would remind her that she was with him felt like a thousand goodbyes. Every whisper of his name from her lips felt like an eternity of apologies. Every thrust of his hips against her felt like missed opportunities.

”Are you alright?” He whispered between thrusts.

Despite the pitch black darkness they were in and the pillow that she almost buried her face into, she felt as if he could see and feel her emotions. It was almost as if he knew the tears were present in her eyes.

”I’m fine.” She moaned back, struggling to keep her voice from cracking as she pulled him down for another kiss. One that made her feel all alone.

When they were finished and he had tired himself out and fell asleep with his arms around her, only then did she allow herself to gently weep into the night. Her lover was oblivious to what she would be doing to his emotions tomorrow.

”I’m so, so sorry...” She choked quietly, so quietly that it was almost inaudible to her own ears.

He never woke up during the night, and that was for the better.

* * *

King Shachi arrived the next day, grand and looking fresh. His hair was long and he even had a beard of some sorts.

He had introduced himself to Ken. Touka was there to watch.

In her own opinion, the new king of Kingdom Aogiri appeared to be a rather kind man. But only appearing so. She didn't know what darkness could be hiding within his heart.

But, that wasn't her concern now. Her main concern was to sneak away from the castle without anybody noticing.

She made sure that Ken and his higher ups were with King Shachi in his office. She knew that their conversations would last for a very long time, so she had time to prepare. But it didn't mean that she could take her own sweet time.

She was quick to dive into the showers and clean her body using the new bar of soap she bought. Just to be extra sure, she had used the soap suds to wash her hair. 

When she had stepped out of the showers and dried herself, she couldn't even detect any of her old scent on her body.

Working quickly, she had packed her remaining belongings into her trunk and practically sprinted out of the castle. She had slapped her newly bought straw hat on her head and tucked her hair into the hat as she ran out into the kingdom, never looking behind.

Her heart was practically beating outside of her chest at this point. She was nervously glancing around as she waited for one of the carriages that could transport her to somewhere far from Kingdom Goat.

Nobody had peeked their head out of the castle. That was a relief.

When the next carriage had arrived, she was quick to ask where they would be stopping.

"Eh?" The driver grumbled. "This carriage's goin' to Cochlea, it is. Some village near Kingdom CCG, a little far from it, though."

Perfect. Kingdom CCG was the furthest kingdom away from Kingdom Goat. The chances of anybody looking into the Cochlea Village to search for her would be relatively low.

She could start a new life there with her unborn baby. Maybe meet a few friends or another man.

The latter thought made her pause for just a slight second when she was boarding the carriage with a few more people.

In her heart, she knew that there would never be another man for her.

The ride towards Cochlea was quiet in the beginning. Touka was trying not to fall asleep.

"Damn that Urie," One of the passengers sitting next to her muttered. "I understand that we're all close friends and all, but did he really have to drag us to Cochlea? What's the point? He lives in Kingdom CCG anyways and can't visit us most of the time."

"Well, it's a new start for the three of us," Another one said. This one had hair that was as green as the forests. "It's a new place and all."

"I agree with Tooru," A little girl said cheerfully. Her hair was as blue as the skies on a good day. "But, it won't be easy to find a new house there. I heard they don't allow individuals to live in their own house. They have to be living with a few people."

"Bah!" The orange haired man grunted. "That's some rule that deserves to sit in the bull dung! One person living with multiple people? Stupid rule."

"They have no choice, Shirazu," Tooru said. "The space they have is limited and it takes too long to build a house. It's better for people to share a house. Besides, what are you complaining about? We've shared a house before and after Urie left for Kingdom CCG. And, crime rate is low in Cochlea."

Shirazu went quiet after that.

Touka's stomach dropped. She would have to share a house with multiple people? Strangers, at that! She wouldn't feel safe at all.

Her lips pursed as she thought of various scenarios that she would be presented with. Her thoughts ranged from the best case scenario to the worst case scenario.

She was so absorbed in her thoughts that she failed to hear the others in the carriage muttering something regarding her.

A tap on her shoulder almost caused her to jump out of her seat. She snapped her head towards the little girl who had tapped her on her shoulder, giving her a look that was questioning what she had just done.

”Sorry, miss,” The little girl said. “The carriage here leads to Cochlea. Do you have any relatives living there?”

She shook her head. Her mother’s older brother had passed away and her other uncle was living in an unknown location. Her father had no siblings, and her only sibling was living in Kingdom Aogiri.

The young girl smiled. “Why not live with us? There’s that rule in Cochlea, after all.”

Touka held up her hands and gave a polite smile. “Oh, no, no. The three of you are friends, I can’t intrude...”

”Who cares?” Shirazu interrupted. “It’s beneficial to all of us. We all get to live in a house.”

”He does have a point, you know.” Tooru said kindly.

Touka swallowed. She never really liked trusting strangers—like anybody did—let alone live with three of them. She wouldn’t be able to predict what could happen to her in the presence of two men. For all she knew, the little girl was their leader or something, and they were plotting to tear her guts open the second she trusted them.

Though she was wary, the look in their eyes was an eager and trusting one. Did they trust her?

She didn’t know.

A few moment went by. Her mind seemed to have made up her decision. Like Shirazu said, it would be beneficial to all of them due to that dumb rule in Cochlea.

”...fine.” She said.

* * *

The moment Ken had stepped out of his office after a _delightful_ chat and discussion with King Shachi, he realised that he couldn’t detect Touka’s scent.

The familiar and comforting scent that he had always loved was nowhere to be detected in the castle.

However, this wasn’t surprising to him in the slightest. He knew that Touka enjoyed going out of the castle because she preferred to stay outdoors and not in a single location for a long period of time.

He smiled. She was probably looking at vegetables or taking a walk in the kingdom. She would be back soon.

He had many things to share with her. King Shachi was a much better king than Yamori had been, and he could already see that the man was planning changes for his kingdom, starting with the children being treated in a better way.

He really couldn’t wait to see her face once he told her about that.

While he would wait for her to return to the castle, he would continue with his paperwork. It was always good to get some work out of the way so that he could have more time with Touka later on.

He grabbed his quill and started on his first sheet of paper.

Time had passed when he finally looked up to see, not Touka, but another servant alerting him that it was dinner time.

On the inside, he frowned. Usually, it would be Touka that would call him down for dinner. If it wasn’t her, then she would send Hinami to call him down.

Gingerly, he lifted himself off of his chair, walking slowly towards the door. 

She still wasn’t in the castle.

Maybe she was just taking a stroll outside and forgot about the timing.

Ken’s mind seemed to be content with that idea so far. She would definitely be back soon.

With that in mind, he didn’t really mind seeing that she was not present in the dining hall as he took his meal. He would give her the time she needed to go out and relax a little.

The hours ticked by after his dinner and she still wasn’t back.

By now, Ken was worried. She never stayed out this late before. Did something happen to her while she was outdoors?

His mind had flipped through the worst case scenarios that could have happened to Touka. She could have been kidnaped and locked in someone’s basement. She could have been raped and left alone, broken in the dark. Or, she could have been murdered.

He stood up from his chair the moment those scenarios appeared in his mind. He needed to find her. Now.

He didn’t even bother ringing the bells to his higher ups’ rooms. He just ran down the hallway to each of their rooms—or office, depending on where they were—and demanded that they search for a woman with hair that covered the right side of her face.

All of them with the exception of Hide were off in a heartbeat.

”My King,” He said, following Ken towards the castle entrance. “What is the matter?”

”I can’t find her.” Ken said almost frantically. “Touka. I can’t smell her. I don’t know where she’s gone to. I don’t even know if she’s alive at this point!”

He stopped to take a deep breath. “Search every house, leave none of them unsearched. Report to me immediately.”

Hide nodded before taking off.

Ken gazed at the kingdom in front of him. He was hoping that she was still alive and that she would be able to return back to the castle soon.

* * *

Cochlea was definitely a small village. There weren’t many houses around. Then, Touka remembered the rule of multiple people having to share a house and realised why there weren’t many houses.

”I heard people living together tend to form families,” Saiko, the little girl, said. “That’s a little strange to me.”

”Why?” Touka asked.

She shrugged. “It’s a little awkward when you wake up one day and your roommate tells you she’s pregnant.”

Touka raised her eyebrows. That was a little awkward and would feel strange if there were only three people living together. Two would start a family and the other would just be there.

”Saiko,” Tooru said, returning from the village leader. “The leader says there are a few available houses.”

”So vague,” Shirazu mumbled. “Available houses for how many people? There are four of us here.”

”We’re free to take a look.” Tooru said, grabbing his trunk and leaving towards the available houses. “The ones that are empty have a rose standing in front of the door.”

And off they went. 

The first house had a second level to it, even a balcony. The inside had already been furnished with a few pieces of furniture; a dining table, a fireplace and a small cupboard in the kitchen area.

When they had stepped foot indoors, they each coughed. The inside was dusty and musty. If they were to choose this house, a cleansing would be in order. The rooms were small and low, so low that Shirazu had to bend his back in order to enter it. It was immediately cancelled as one of their options.

The second house had three floors. Like the first, there were already a few pieces of furniture within the house. The second house was spacious, and even had four bedrooms. Unlike the first house, Shirazu didn’t need to bend his back in order to enter the bedrooms.

”This one,” He said after plopping himself down on one of the empty beds. “I like this house. This is the one I want.”

”You haven’t even seen the other houses yet!” Saiko protested, grabbing his hand and dragging him off the bed. “I want to see the rest of the available houses!”

”That’s right, Shirazu. Don’t be like this. We even have a new person with us, too.” Tooru scolded.

If Touka was being honest, she felt extremely awkward. Here she was, a complete stranger to these three, deciding which house to purchase like a newly wed couple.

She looked at her feet, feeling extreme guilt when she thought about Ken. The poor man must be so confused as to where she was now.

”Touka?” Saiko’s voice jolted her out of her thoughts.

”Y-Yes?” She quickly answered.

”What do you think about this house?” Saiko asked. “Shirazu is reluctant to move because he thinks it’s the _perfect_ house. We think it’s a good house, too, but we want your opinion on it.”

Touka thought about it for a moment. The house was spacious and could house the four of them with no issue. Her only problem would be the discomfort of living with strangers, but she was sure that that feeling would eventually fade away the more she talked to them.

”I think it’s nice,” She said, giving her honest opinion. “It’s large enough for the four of us.”

The trio glanced at one another, seemingly agreeing that they would purchase the house.

”Alright,” Shirazu said. “Hurry up and we split the pay. I wanna lie down.”

Touka raised her eyebrows in amusement as she dug out the twenty five silver coins as part of her pay for the house. The total cost was a hundred silver coins.

The other three coughed up their payments, too.

”I’ll take this to Mister Kijima, then.” Tooru announced. “When I come back, we’ll own the house.”

Touka decided to take a seat in the room she chose while she waited for Tooru to come back. The bed frame had no mattress currently, but she would purchase one later.

She sighed as she stared at the wall of her new room. It was white in colour, with some powdery residue dropping off of it. She would really need to clean this new room.

She lifted her hand to her stomach, rubbing it gently. Soon, it would start to expand in size, and she would begin to feel her baby move around inside of her.

A part of her was excited. She would be able to feel her own baby move inside of her, and eventually hold her baby in her own two arms. Another part of her was sad. Ken would not be here to experience the same happiness as she would. Instead, he would live out a portion of his life depressed, wondering where she went and why she had left him.

He would probably think that he had done something horribly wrong for her to do this. She felt guilty for causing him all of the pain he would feel now and in the future, but it had to be done. She couldn’t allow his family to suffer this kind of shame.

“Touka,” Saiko called. She was standing at her doorway. “Are you alright?”

Touka shook off any remaining sadness she felt and looked towards Saiko with a small smile on her face. “I’m fine. What’s the matter?”

”I-I really don’t mean to just invade your privacy,” The woman in front of her started. “B-But... are you p-pregnant...?”

Touka froze. How did she know about that?

”Yo-You seemed really sad when you placed your hand on your belly,” Saiko explained. “I just thought...” 

The older woman sighed and glanced at the hand that was still on her flat stomach. She rubbed at it again, feeling an unknown emotion well up inside her.

“I am,” Touka said softly.

”Is t-that the reason why—um—you’re here n-now...?” Saiko asked hesitantly.

Touka sighed again. She didn’t want to speak of what she was going through to a complete stranger.

”...maybe some other time.” She said curtly.

She could practically feel Saiko frowning, obviously not satisfied with her answer, but not willing to press her any further.

”I understand.” Saiko said quietly, leaving the room a few moments after.

Touka looked out of the small window in her room. She wasn’t stupid. She knew that Ken would be sending his higher ups to look for her.

Almost all his higher ups were wolves with an incredible sense of smell. If she could hide her body and scent, she wouldn’t be discovered. However, the trouble came with the other three, who wouldn’t know what to do in the event that a higher up from Kingdom Goat came knocking on their door.

Maybe they would be smart if that happened. It wasn’t every day that an important person came looking for her, and they may find it suspicious that someone would be doing this, and may just drive them off by saying that they knew nothing of her.

Or maybe she would be smart and alert them first. Give them the lines that they should provide to whatever higher up that came knocking on their door.

“What did I drag myself into...?” She whispered to herself.

For now, she didn’t know what to do. Her mind was clouded with guilt and fear. Guilt from how she just left Ken without a word. Fear from how she would face everything if she chose to try to ignore it all, then have the consequences slap her across the face.

She needed to get used to this. After all, it was the life that she chose. She had to stick to it no matter what until the day she laid on her deathbed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the ones that were expecting more angst, it’ll likely come by the next chapter. I hope you enjoyed this new chapter!


	24. Seek

“We couldn’t find her.”

Ken felt like someone had just stabbed him in the heart with his own sword.

Touka wasn’t in the kingdom. 

“Y-You’re sure you c-checked all of the houses, r-right...?” He managed to choke out. He was already struggling to maintain composure on the outside, and even more so for his voice.

Hide nodded. “We’ve scoured every house. We checked every basement and every attic. There was no sign of her anywhere, sir.”

Ken slumped back in his seat. The pain in his heart was growing from the worry he had experienced for the whole night. Due to him being so worried, he couldn’t even sleep, and the dark rings beneath his eyes were starting to return again.

”...maybe she was taken to another kingdom.” Hide suggested. “We can travel to the different kingdoms after two days of rest.”

”Please.” Ken whispered, putting his elbows on the desk in front of him, then placing his head into his hands. “I’m worried...”

A hand was placed on his shoulder and patted on in a comforting manner. It didn’t help ease the terrible pain he felt in his heart.

”We’ll find her,” Hide promised. “I give you my word. The other higher ups and I will find her. We won’t let you down, sir.”

Ken sighed and said nothing. The pain seemed to be restricting his speech now.

* * *

Shirazu was confused as to why the first thing he woke up to was the oddest sound he had ever heard in the morning.

The sound of someone retching into the toilet, he realised.

He wouldn’t find someone vomiting into a toilet strange. What he found strange was that someone was vomiting into a toilet before breakfast and early in the morning.

Didn’t vomiting usually occur because of overeating after meals?

He had expected Saiko to be the one bent over the toilet and heaving her insides into the toilet bowl—She always ate too much during the night—however, it wasn’t Saiko that was over the toilet bowl, but rather Touka.

Tooru was holding Touka’s hair back while Saiko rushed out the house with a wooden cup while screaming that she would get some water for Touka.

When Shirazu looked out the window, he could see Saiko rushing to the nearby water pump to fetch some water.

”What’s wrong with her?” He asked, edging closer to Tooru.

Tooru shook his head. “I don’t know. She woke up and just rushed to the toilet.”

”Stomach flu?” Shirazu suggested. “I heard that stomach flu patients vomit a lot.” 

“No.” Touka groaned as another wave of yellow bile erupted from her throat.

”She hasn’t even had her breakfast yet...” Tooru said sadly while rubbing Touka’s back in a comforting manner. “Why is she throwing up so much...?”

It took a moment, but Touka finally raised her head from the toilet bowl and turned around.

”Jeez,” Shirazu remarked. “You look completely drained.”

Touka’s hair was slick with sweat and strands of it had pressed against her face. Her face was as white as snow and her eyes were slightly bloodshot.

”Here,” Saiko urged after blasting through the front door. The water cup was full when she passed it to Touka.

”Thank you,” She muttered before downing the water. Her throat felt like a desert.

”I’m sorry,” Touka said to Shirazu. “I think I might’ve woken you up.”

Shirazu felt a slight heat rise up to his face as he held his hands up and jumped back a little. “No, no! That’s fine! Why aren’t you apologising when you couldn’t control that?”

He watched as Touka rubbed her stomach.

”Just...” She sighed. “You may have to deal with this for a few months...”

Tooru connected the dots. “You’re pregnant.”

Saiko helped Touka stand up. The both of them seemed to ignore his statement as Saiko guided Touka into the kitchen.

Shirazu frowned and looked at Tooru. “You’re sure?”

”Positive.”

Touka had taken a seat on the dining table that was inside the kitchen. It was cramped and a little dusty, but she didn’t mind a lot. Her head was still spinning and her stomach hurt slightly.

”We’re a bunch of idiots,” Saiko grumbled.

”Why?” Shirazu asked.

”We didn’t think to purchase food yesterday.”

”Are you serious!” Tooru grumbled. “I’m starved!”

”We can go to a nearby place to eat,” Touka suggested, still rubbing at her queasy belly.

”Good idea!” Shirazu said.

”Oh, no, we don’t!” Saiko interrupted. “This woman just threw up half her insides. She can’t move around a lot until some time passes!”

Touka held up her hands. “Really. I’m fine. We can just go out and eat, and maybe look for a job or something.”

Saiko seemed to reconsider this for a moment. 

“Oh, alright.”

* * *

His paperwork was already finished. 

Usually, Ken would spend the free time he had with Touka. He would sneak a kiss here and there, chat with her about the latest things, or even take her to his bedroom. 

But, she wasn’t here.

His heart throbbed painfully when he remembered that she was no longer within the castle.

A fist clenched his desk and the other rubbed at his tired face.

He had not slept for two days.

Exhaustion was growing on his body. But it was not enough to cover the pain he felt in his heart. Nothing would be able to soothe the painful throbs that were in his chest every second of the day.

Maybe he would head down to one of the training rooms in the castle. Maybe he would try to distract his mind by training himself in the arts of sword fighting again.

He hadn’t had the time to practice in ages.

Slowly, he walked towards the training room that he had spend years in when he was a child.

The room was large, but dusty. No one had used it in a very long time.

He felt nothing as his lungs inhaled the dusty air.

His target were the training dummies. His weapon was no a wooden stick, but an actual sword made by the finest blacksmith in the kingdom.

Without hesitation, he begun his merciless hacks against the training dummies.

It was exhilarating. To be able to let loose and cut up a dummy that resembled a human. How he relished how easily his sword sliced through the thick hay bundles.

If he tried hard enough, he could imagine the dummies as his enemies.

Yamori.

The Oggai.

Anybody who attempted an assassination on him.

His blood boiled with excitement as the adrenaline pumped through his body. They were all dead! Hacked and hacked to pieces that made it so they looked like chewed bits of hay.

It wasn’t enough for him.

The immobile dummies were to simple. He needed somebody to fight back against him. He wanted to see the hope wane in his victim’s eyes as he overpowered them and brought his sword down on them.

There really was nothing better than to see the life drain from his enemies’ eyes.

He would be patient. He would wait until his higher ups returned. Then, he would practice against them.

By the time he was satisfied, the training dummies had been reduced to nothing but a pile of chopped hay.

He felt marvellous. He would definitely enjoy seeing his enemies chopped up into little, tiny pieces.

However, the moment he sheathed his sword, the intense agony and despair reemerged in his heart.

His hand reached for his chest and clutched tightly at the clothing just above his heart.

"Touka..." He whispered. "Where are you...?"

Ken missed her. He was worried for her. Where was she?

He felt lonely without her.

"Don't... don't do this to me..." He murmured.

* * *

Two days had passed since Touka had moved to Cochlea. If she were being honest, she was enjoying herself in the new environment.

Of course, she still threw up in the morning from the pregnancy and the guilt still plagued her thoughts and dreams, but overall, she was enjoying herself.

They had purchased some food to stock in their pantries, and some furniture to garnish the house. All that was left for them was to locate a job.

Touka had found a job in a pub at the centre of Cochlea. The boss there made her make and serve drinks to customers. It wasn’t the best of jobs and she was tired of dealing with the men who would ‘politely’ invite her to their houses but she was happy with the salary of three silver coins a week.

Today, she was finely grinding the coffee beans into a powder before placing them over a sheet of muslin and pouring hot water over it.

Her shift was from the morning to the afternoon, and her shift was almost over. She would be going home soon.

Out of nowhere, a strange feeling emerged from the pits of her stomach. It was a bad feeling, the kind she would get whenever she anticipated that something bad would happen on a day.

She had already been missing from Kingdom Goat for almost four days. By now, Ken would have sent out his higher ups to search for her.

Her heart beat faster. More than half of his higher ups were wolves who could smell her out from a good distance away. 

The new soap she had used to avoid Ken would mask her scent. However, her next shower would be a few hours away. And she was certain that Ken’s higher ups would be here soon.

Acting quick, she served the coffee to the awaiting customer and took her leave. She was panicking now. The others in the village wouldn’t be able to tell Ken’s higher ups that they saw her. She had made sure to tie her hair up each time she went out to purchase something or for work. All that was left was to cover her scent.

Tooru and Shirazu had not found good paying jobs, so they would be home. She had to alert them and quickly take another shower to mask her scent.

She had practically sprinted home and threw the door open, surprising Tooru, who was sitting on a chair and staring out the window.

”Tooru,” Touka gasped, out of breath. “Please. If anybody comes looking for me, do not let them know I am here!”

”E-Eh!?” Tooru cried, not having a chance to react as Touka dash upstairs to grab her bar of soap and towel.

”I’ll explain everything later!” She yelled. “Just don’t let anyone know that I live here!”

The water they used for their showers had already been taken from the water pumps in the morning. Four buckets stood in the small bathroom they had. One bucket per person.

She reached for her bucket and hauled it closer to herself before stripping and beginning her shower.

It was a quick shower. She needed to be quick, after all.

She was hurriedly drying her hair as she rushed back into her room and closed the door behind her.

Her sensitive ears were listening in all directions, completely aware of every little creaking sound in the house.

For a brief moment, nothing happened. Then she almost had a heart attack when she heard someone knocking on the front door.

”Coming!” came Tooru’s voice.

Once again, her heart started racing as she listened for whoever was outside the door.

”Excuse me,” A familiar voice drawled. She realised the voice belonged to Shuu. 

“May I help you?” Tooru asked politely. Though she could hear that his voice was slightly strained.

”Yes,” Shuu said. “I am looking for a woman. She has her hair down on the right side of her face. She has recently gone missing from home and I am looking for her. Have you seen her, by any chance?”

“N-No, I haven’t.” Tooru said.

Touka knew then. Shuu didn’t believe Tooru. The hesitation and stutter in his voice was, seemingly, enough for Shuu to know that Tooru was hiding something.

”I am terribly sorry for this,” Shuu said. “But my master has asked for me to check every house, including the interior. If you don’t mind, I would like to investigate the house.” 

Touka cursed repeatedly in her head. Shuu would likely investigate every single room in the house. He would find her, and drag her back to Kingdom Goat. She would have to face Ken and suffer the consequences.

She would be kept on close watch, and she wouldn’t be able to leave the kingdom again. Her child would be born and shamed.

A tear rolled down her cheek. The stress she was experiencing in this small moment was overwhelming.

His footsteps wandered around the house, then slowly ascended the stairs. 

Touka held her breath. She had to face this if she was caught. But that didn’t stop her from slowly moving the chair in her room to the door knob as a makeshift barrier.

His footsteps were right outside the door. She could hear his breathing. She could imagine his hand reaching for the doorknob.

”Oi!” 

She almost jumped at Shirazu’s sudden booming voice.

”Mister, please don’t enter there,” Shirazu said. “My wife is inside. Her health is poor and the doctor has advised no one go inside and disturb her rest.”

Touka could hear a soft sighing sound, no doubt Shuu trying to detect a lie in Shirazu’s words.

”...very well.” Shuu said quietly. “I will take my leave now. Thank you for your time.”

Touka didn’t let out her breath until she was certain she heard the front door close.

”T-Touka?” Came Tooru’s voice. “Come out... he’s gone.”

Touka emerged from the room, breathing hard as she closed the door behind her. Her back hit the wall and she slid down against it until she was sitting on the floor.

”I’m sorry,” She whispered. 

“No, no!” Shirazu cried out. “What d’you have to be sorry for?”

”It’s my fault that this happened,” Touka said, taking a deep breath. “It’s because of me that they—he’s doing this...”

”Touka, can you tell us what’s going on...?” Tooru said.

Touka shook her head. “I want Saiko to be here to listen to it. Please, wait for now.”

* * *

 

It took two days for Ken’s higher ups to go to the various kingdoms and villages to question about Touka’s whereabouts. Afterwards, it took them another two days for all of them to return to Kingdom Goat.

Ken felt his heart get heavier and heavier, more and more painful as every higher up that had reported to him reported no sightings or information regarding Touka.

His last bit of hope rode on Shuu, who was the only higher up who hadn’t reported back yet.

Once again, the paperwork on his desk was already finished and he had nothing more to do. Currently, he was pacing back and forth in his office while waiting for Shuu to return.

He didn’t know how long he had been pacing for, but he was almost certain that he had walked around so much that he had dented his floor.

A knock on his door.

”C-Come in!” He called.

It was Shuu. His heart starting racing in anticipation for what Shuu was about to say.

A few sentences from his final higher up could stop the pain and despair he was feeling, or they could increase it tenfold.

”Well?” He asked hopefully.

Shuu looked down at his feet, took a deep breath and looked up. He shook his head sadly. “I am sorry, my king. We couldn’t find any trace of her.”

Ken took a sharp intake of air as he turned his back on Shuu.

”I... I would like to be alone.” He muttered.

”Yes, sir.” Shuu whispered sadly, sliding out from the room.

Only when Ken was certain that Shuu was far away enough did he allow himself to completely break down.

He crumpled. His entire body collapsed onto the floor as he tried to control his heavy breathing and his sobbing.

Tear flowed freely from both of his eyes and he had to rip his mask off his face so he wouldn’t drown in his own tears.

His heart cried out for his missing lover. The pain and despair and hopelessness he felt was enough to let him know that.

”Why me...?” He croaked out quietly. “Where did I go wrong...? What did I do wrong...?”

His parents had already been taken from his life. Fate was so cruel as to take the only woman he had ever loved romantically, too.

He wanted so much more with her. A family of his own. Children that he would happily raise with her.

He wanted her as his queen.

Where did he go wrong? What did he do that was so wrong and so horrible that Fate decided to do this to him?

His questions were obviously left unanswered as he cried. Somehow, he had dragged himself to his desk once again and sat on it before placing his arms on it and burying his face into them.

Nobody knew where Touka was. It was like she had disappeared into thin air. It was almost as if she had never even existed.

But, he knew that she existed. Why else would he be crying? Why else would he be flipping through the memories he shared with her?

When Hide had finally stepped into his room to check on the king, he sadly realised that the man in front of him had cried himself to sleep. The leather mask that was always on his face was discarded on the floor, revealing the man’s burnt skin.

When he moved closer, he could see the the tears still flowing from his eyes. Even in sleep, he could not escape the despair that haunted him. He could not escape the feelings that he had for her.

Hide was certain that the king’s nightmares were of him losing Touka to eternal darkness, never to see her again.

He pitied Ken. To be reunited with the woman he loved so dearly, then have her taken away from him before he could experience a family with her.

He always knew that Ken wanted a family with Touka. Ken would have married her if she had not disappeared. He wouldn’t have given a damn about what the others would have thought about his and her social standing. 

“I’m sorry,” He whispered. “I’m so sorry.”

Why couldn’t he have been more alert on that day? Why couldn’t he have kept an eye on the woman Ken loved so much? Why wasn’t he able to find her when he took off a few days ago?

His mistakes taunted him. They whispered that the king wouldn’t be like this had he not watched over her. His thoughts hissed that he could have prevented all of this by just being a better higher up.

Hide clenched his fists. The anger within him was steadily increasing as his mind flipped through all of the opportunities he had to prevent this.

In order to prevent his anger from taking over him, he had stormed out of Ken’s office and headed straight for the training room, intent on destroying the training dummies to quell his anger.

Only, they had already been destroyed.

A pile of hay laid before his feet.

It was clear who had came in oreviously to wreck havoc on the training dummies.

Maybe he would spar against Ken tomorrow. They would both be able to distract their minds if they did so.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m honestly hoping that my writing would increase to 6K words a chapter by the time Nonexistent Heartbeat starts. I really want to give you guys the best quality of my work possible.


	25. Sadistic Joy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why does writer’s block disappear during the night at 3 am? I NEED SLEEP

Three months had passed since Touka had moved to Cochlea. Three months had passed since she had revealed who the father of he baby was and why she was being tracked down. Three months of a quiet life with the other three.

Her stomach was starting to show.

She rubbed at her swollen stomach, wondering how her baby would look.

Would they resemble her or Ken more? Who would they take after when they grew older?

She let out a quiet, hollow and bitter laugh. There was no point in thinking about him now, her brain would tell her. What’s done is done.

Yet, the longer she was nurturing the baby inside of her, the more she thought of Ken.

He was the father to their baby, yet he couldn’t see them at all. He wasn’t even aware that he was having a child with Touka. She imagined that he never would have thought of it, and was still wondering where she was.

She pursed her lips. Even after three whole months, the guilt that haunted her dreams and thoughts was still not gone. She expected it to follow her for life, and she wouldn’t mind. It was her own selfish decision to leave him, after all.

They weren’t careful enough, and had planted a child within her. An innocent and sweet baby who wouldn’t deserve to be shamed for life just because of it’s parents’ social standings.

”Touka~,” came Saiko’s voice.

Touka shook her head slightly to rid her thoughts. “Yes?”

”Have you thought of what you wanted to name the baby?” The short woman quipped, stepping into her bedroom with a hop.

Touka paused. She hadn’t. She hadn’t thought of a name for the baby because she (begrudgingly) knew that she would be terrible at naming the baby. She was not good with words.

She shook her head. “No, I haven’t. I don’t really know what I’ll name them, honestly. And I’ll have to come up with a name if it is a boy, and another if it is a girl.”

”Hmm,” Saiko said, plopping herself on Touka’s bed while behind careful to no accidentally sit on the woman’s legs. “Well, the three of us can help! Though, we aren’t very good with naming babies.”

Touka smiled. “That’s alright. I’m no good at naming babies either.”

* * *

”Get up!” boomed Ken.

It had become a daily routine of his to spar against his higher ups when all of them were finished with their paperwork. It was the only thing that could keep his mind off of Touka and how much he missed her. How much he wanted to hold her in his arms again and never let go of her.

Three of his higher ups had sparred against him today; Shuu, Koma and Irimi. And they had all been beaten down by him.

”We’re trying, sir...” Koma wheezed, struggling to recover from Ken’s onslaught of attacks with the wooden stick. He never knew wooden sticks could hurt this badly.

”It’s very hard... our bodies are fatigued...” Irimi groaned and she struggled to stand on her feet. “Perhaps we should... stop for the day?”

Ken was seriously about to protest, but something within him caused him to hesitate.

He looked at his fatigued and injured higher ups. They were giving their best for him, and he had beaten them so badly that they were struggling to even stand up.

”...fine.” He muttered, tossing the polished wooden stick back into the box that was filled with the same sticks. “The next session will be in a few days.”

His higher ups looked at one another, then back to him, shocked that the next session for them to spar would be in a _few days._

”A-Are you sure, m-my king?” Koma asked hesitantly. He had been used to sparring for the past few months and this was a change for him.

Ken gave a curt nod before exiting the room. He wanted to be out of his battle suit and needed water to wash away the sweat on his skin. Now.

He knew he had changed over the last few months. He knew that better than anyone.

He first realised it when Nishiki seemed... scared when he had to bring in another small stack of papers for him. Then, it was Shuu who flinched away from him when his hand grew too close to his own when he tried to reach for a report.

It didn’t take a genius to figure out that he had grown colder over the past few months. The pain, despair and agony he had been feeling daily had partially morphed into anger.

He was angry at his higher ups for not being able to find Touka. He was angry at Touka for disappearing out of nowhere. He was angry at the thoughts of her that would enter his mind and send him into tears again. 

He was angry at himself for not being able to prevent all this.

Nothing would have happened if he had kept her by his side and watched over her. If he hadn’t let his mind stray away from her during his conversation with King Shachi, she would still be here with him.

The mere thought of him being with her had changed the anger he felt back into their original components of pain, despair and agony.

The painful emotions grew daily. The excruciating pain he felt was almost unbearable. He felt as if someone had just torn a hole where his heart should be and left him bleeding to death.

He sighed and palmed his face.

He was so tired.

Ever since Touka had vanished into thin air, he hadn’t gotten much sleep at all. His nightmares would keep him restless and, occasionally, he would wake up from them either screaming or crying.

His nightmares usually had him walking side by side with Touka in the gardens with her hand in his, happy like how he was a few months ago. Then, she would either vanish completely, or his nightmares would bleed darkness and steal her away from him. He would always, always attempt to give chase. But no matter how fast he ran, he could never catch up with her.

Sometimes, his mind would be even crueler to him. They would show him a happy, happy dream. They would show him a future with her. They would show her cradling their baby gently in her arms and telling him to come over to them. Then, the both of them would disappear, leaving him in the darkness.

He would wake up after he could no longer see her in his dreams. After that, he wouldn’t be able to sleep anymore.

If his hair was still as white as snow, he would look like an old man now. However, his hair had completely reverted back to his original black. Now he just looked like a fatigued man.

He was more than just a fatigued man, though.

He wanted so badly for the ache in his heart to fade away. To never exist again. But it wouldn’t go away. 

She was on his mind almost every hour of the day. The only times when she wasn’t was when he was busy sparring with his higher ups. When she wasn’t on his mind, the pain would be gone, too.

But he couldn’t spar for eternity, and neither could his higher ups. The pain was bound to return and torment his already frail and fragile heart.

He hoped that she was still alive somewhere. He hoped that, one day, she would find her way back to him and everything would go back to how it used to be.

It was a bleak hope. His higher ups couldn’t find her anywhere. Even with their highly trained senses, they were unable to locate or even detect a shred of her presence.

Still, he hoped. The tiny bit of hope that he clung onto was the only thing that was keeping him from breaking down completely.

If he could, he would have ran off to the ends of the world to search for her. He would stop at nothing until he found her and she was safe in his arms.

Alas, he could not. He was a king. A king had duties to attend to daily, and he couldn’t abandon his entire kingdom for the sake of a single woman, no matter how much he wanted to. He knew that his duties as king came first more than anything else. He couldn’t afford to let go of thousands of citizens for her.

There was nothing for him to do anymore. He couldn’t spar, he couldn’t finish any more paperwork. All that was left for him to do was experience the agonising pain in his chest.

He was so very tired.

Ken let his body lead him. And they ended up leading him to his bedroom.

Whether it was because his body needed sleep or because they wanted to find the slimmest traces of her on the bedsheets, he didn’t know.

It didn’t take long for him to untie his mask, throw it on the floor, and stagger towards his bed before lazily throwing himself on it face down.

He turned his head slightly, staring at the spot where she would be sleeping at if he had taken her to bed.

He could almost, _almost_ , imagine her there. Her pale, bare back to him and her dark hair over his bedsheets. He could almost imagine that she had sensed his eyes on her, and had turned around to offer him a warm hug, which, at the time, he would have gladly accepted.

But, he blinked. And it was all gone. He was alone in the room again, with nobody else.

To rid himself of reality, he had buried his face into the sheets again.

He could still smell her on his bedsheets. 

At night, it would offer him the smallest of comforts. Like she was still there, gently caressing his hair, guiding him into the realm of sleep and dreams.

But, she wasn’t.

No one was there to see the tears that stained his bedsheets.

* * *

”Mm... I don’t like this one.”

Touka sighedand tapped her fingers against the dining table. She had been going through baby names with the other three for a while now.

Each time one of them suggested a name, another would disagree with the name.

Tooru stares at the list of baby names they had written on the sheet of paper.

”Kazuki,” He said.

Saiko raised her eyebrows. “Not bad. What does it mean?”

Tooru wrote the name down on a sheet of paper, just in case the other two disagreed with the name. “It’s supposed to mean harmony, peace or hope.”

Touka nodded her head. It wasn’t bad. She couldn’t really say anything against the name, because she was absolutely terrible at naming things.

”I like it.” Shirazu said.

Saiko threw her hands in the air. “Finally! A name we all agree on!”

”But that’s a boy’s name,” Touka pointed out. “What if the baby is a girl?”

The younger woman smacked her head against the table. “Another hour of this...?”

Shirazu laughed. “Maybe we eat a little first.”

”Should we go out to eat?” Saiko mumbled. “I don’t want to cook.”

”Why not? I’ll go mess up my hair a little and we can go.”

It was noon when they headed out. Touka had ruffled her hair so that her hair was no longer covering the right side of her face, but was more evenly spread out across her entire head. She brought her hat in case anything happened.

They had wandered towards one of the village’s pubs to eat. It was one of the only pubs that the four of them enjoyed eating at.

They had sat down, ordered their food, ate it, then wandered back out.

On the way back home, Shirazu paused.

”Shiragin,” Saiko chirped. “What’s wrong?”

He was staring at a flower.

“What about Hana?” He said.

”Hm?”

”Hana. The girl name for the baby.”

Saiko frowned. “Too generic.”

”It isn’t bad,” Tooru said. “But I agree that it’s too generic.”

Touka shrugged. “We’ll just go home and figure out what we’ll decide for the girl’s name, alright?”

Once again, they were seated at the small dining table in their house, paper in front of them and thinking about names.

So far they had; Hana, Himari, Sakura for the names relating to flowers.

”Does it _have_ to stick to flowers?” Shirazu groaned.

”Shut it,” Saiko said. “You’re the one who suggested a flower related name, so we’re sticking to the flower related name!”

“I suggested _one_ flower name,” He retorted. “Doesn’t mean we have to stick to it!”

”One flower,” Tooru murmured. “What about Ichika?”

”Ichika?” Touka asked. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

He wrote the kanji of the name down on the sheet of paper. “It’s supposed to mean ‘one flower’. Thanks, Shirazu.”

The other man seemed confused.

"Ichika," Touka muttered quietly, smiling fondly at the name. "It's nice."

She rubbed at her stomach, thinking about the baby that would be born in a few months time. 

Her thoughts drifted away and became a cloud of gloominess when she thought of Ken.

He wouldn’t be able to share the same joy she would be experiencing. But, to her, it was for the better.

* * *

The sound of his door closing woke him up. 

Ken rubbed his tired eyes as he reached for his mask that laid on the floor before tying it on his face.

He staggered towards the door, not realising that he had just slept for a good amount of time without any nightmares.

A lazy hand reached for the door and pulled it open. He was ready to look down the hallway and confront whoever had just opened the door. But nobody was there.

Was someone playing a joke on him?

He couldn’t think of anybody in the castle who would attempt this. They were all too intimidated by him to pull this sort of thing.

Then, who was it?

A sudden chill went down his spine when he heard the sound of crumpling bedsheets behind him.

It dawned on him that someone was in his room. Someone was around his bed.

He didn’t have his sword on him. Any form of combat he would have to do would have to be with his own fists.

Slowly, he turned around, intent on facing whoever was in his room head on.

The room was dark, though. He couldn’t see properly, but his sense of smell and hearing would be his greatest assets at the present timing.

He listened closely, searching for the faintest noises with his sensitive ears. His nose told him that the intruder was still near his bed.

A footstep towards his direction.

Clothes rustling.

A knee being put on the floor as gently as possible.

Ken barely had the time to react and dart to his side as the intruder launched themselves towards him.

It didn’t take him a second to remember the children that had infiltrated his castle a few months prior. This was probably another child from the same strange organisation.

The child was at his side. He swung his body around the child and held their neck in a chokehold with one arm. The other grabbed at the child’s hand.

”Who are you, and what do you want with me?” He hissed.

Why did he even bother. He already knew the reason why the child was here. 

But maybe he could drag more information out of this one.

The child in his arms didn’t respond, but they were still fighting to escape his grasp.

Ken tightened his arms, choking the child. He felt a surge of happiness course through his veins as the child struggled to breathe. They were clawing at his arm now, but he was oblivious to the pain.

Soon, the child went limp in his arms. They weren’t dead, he made sure that they weren’t. He wanted to interrogate—torture—them for information. 

Perhaps, it would keep Touka out of his mind, just like how sparring would.

He dropped the child to the floor before grabbing them by the hair and dragging them out of his room. He didn’t care if they were children, they were murderers and that’s all they would ever be if they continued down their current path.

”Good for me,” he muttered as he continued to drag the child—a boy—down to the dungeons.

Servants who encountered him on their way looked surprised and shocked, but did nothing to stop him.

He tied the boy onto the chair that his former comrades had been tortured and died on. He made sure that the rope he used to die the boy down was on so tight that his small hands were starting to pale.

To his right, the table of torture equipment was still there. The coals had been long extinguished, but the metal skewers were still there, as were the tongs.

Perhaps he would try out more forms of torture this time.

He had to be patient, even though every cell in his body was screaming for him to get on with it. Everything would be so much more enjoyable if this child was conscious for the whole thing.

So, he waited.

It was already nighttime when he had woken up earlier, so he might have to wait for a while for the child to wake up.

But, he had time. He had lots of it. Not like he slept much during the night.

During this time, he had made sure his higher ups would be aware of the actions he would be taking. They would be the ones to dispose of the body once he was done with it. He also had a few of the servants warm the coals and had his higher ups prepare the torture equipment.

It took a few hours for the child to wake up, and he had done periodic checks on him. The mere thought of being able to do this again had kept his mind off of Touka.

“Don’t you ever learn?” Ken said softly. “Don’t you ever learn to not play with the wrath of the king himself? Your comrades never returned for a reason.”

”And? You expect me to be scared?” He child retorted. Though his response was as such, Ken could easily hear the slight tremble in his voice. His face was oily in the warm glow of the torch near them.

”I will make this easy for you; give me the information I want, and I will let you go. Your comrades were stupid to do otherwise.”

“And if I don’t?” 

Ken reached for the tongs and used them to pick up one of the glowing coals. He sighed in amusement. 

“Then, you’ll see what drove your comrades to death.”

He glances at the boy’s tied feet. He wouldn’t be able to move his feet.

Ken bent down and lifted the small feet, ignoring the screams and demands for him to stop his actions.

He placed the hot coal directly until the boy’s foot, listening gleefully as screams of agony filled the air and entered his ears.

The chair rocked back and forth as the child struggled desperately to relieve his feet of the searing pain. 

“I don’t understand any of you,” Ken continued as he reached for another coal. “Wouldn’t it be so much better to give me the information I want and relieve yourself of this suffering?”

The second coal was placed beneath the boy’s other foot. The screams in the air intensified as he thrashed about furiously.

”Still nothing? Have it your way.”

Without any warning, Ken had stabbed one of the metal skewers into the boy’s lap.

He punched the boy, grinning in satisfaction when he heard the sounds of bone crunching.

”You should’ve brought more of your comrades,” Ken said, stabbing another metal skewer into the flesh. “You might have escaped with your life. Or you had to watch your comrades die by my hands.”

A few hours into the torture, and it was clear that the child would not speak of any sort of information.

His legs had been burnt horribly. Countless holes embedded into his legs. An eye of his had been gouged out by Ken, then squished beneath his own feet. His face head been beaten so badly that his face was swollen.

”Still?” Ken breathed. His face was beaded with sweat from the constant heat from the coals and he was exhausted from the constant punches he dealt to the child.

”You are more resilient than your comrades were,” He praised, bending down to meet the child’s single eye. “But you are far more useless than they were.”

Ken unsheathed his sword and gave a heavy sigh. “You could have avoided this. You could have just given me what I wanted and not have gone through this... horrific torture.”

He held the blade of the sword above the child’s head, who was now looking up and staring at sword in horror.

Apparently, he feared death the most now, even though it would put him out of his misery.

”W-Wait...” He croaked through his swollen cheeks.

”I will listen to your last words,” Ken said tiredly. “Speak.”

”...I-I know wh-where she... is...”

 

 

 

 


	26. Thoughts of the Past, Present, and Future

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter will be kinda heavy with self thoughts and regrets that they both have. And if you’re wondering why Touka’s side constantly has heavy time skips, it’s because there’s nothing much to write there until the baby is born.

The blade of the sword was barely an inch above the boy’s head. It was shaking slightly as Ken struggled to understand.

”...who is where...?” He asked quietly.

A single, black eye stared into his eye.

”Y-Your lover...” The child replied quietly. “I kn-know where she is...”

Ken’s mind was instantly divided into two. One half screamed at him to demand information regarding Touka. The other argued that this was an enemy, and that they could very well be lying.

For now, he would play dummy.

”My lover?” He questioned, not letting any form of excitement leak into his voice.

The child nodded his head furiously. “Yes! The woman w-with her hair down her right side!”

Ken stared at the child with slit eyes. They could very well be lying, and he would know immediately depending on the location they give.

”Speak of where she is, and I will set you free.”

”I-I saw her a-at Cochlea! It’s a village near K-Kingdom CCG!”

Wrong answer.

He knelt down, visible eye crinkled in a smile. The sword forgotten on the floor.

“You lie,” He whispered darkly. “My higher ups have already scoured that village. They have senses of smell so advanced they rival my own. They found nothing and no one. Not even a shred of her scent.”

The boy’s eye widened. “I-I am telling the t-t-truth!”

”You were no different from your comrades,” Ken sighed as he reached for his sword. “Useless children who were driven by revenge. Your wrong paths in life led you to this chair. And now, you die by my hand.”

”I’m not lying!” The boy cried. “P-Please have mercy! Go there for yourself and—“

His head had fallen down onto the floor, and his body went limp.

Ken sighed again, watching the blood drip off his sword. He glared at the fallen head before driving his sword into it, sighing in satisfaction when he saw the blood spurt out as he pulled out his sword.

He knew better than to trust an enemy.

For all he knew, the child was leading him towards their base of operations. Where he would be contained and held. 

How could he allow that when he was king?

He had better things to do for the kingdom than to slaughter children, even if it satisfied his sick desires to see his enemies crushed beneath his own paws, their bodies impaled with his sword, their skulls crushed between his jaws and their sweet, sweet blood flow into his mouth.

He already knew how to control himself.

* * *

Another three months had passed.

Touka’s pregnancy was starting to weigh down on her.

She had trouble sleeping during the night from her heavy belly. Certain foods would cause her to violently eject the contents in her stomach. Her back ached and she had to lean back to feel a little better.

At the very least, the daily bouts of vomiting had stopped.

Her stomach had grown significantly larger as the baby inside of her grew as well.

Occasionally, she would feel the baby inside of her stir. She would feel an arm or a leg pushing the skin of her stomach. 

It warmed her heart, honestly; to know that a baby was growing well and healthy inside of her.

Tooru had informed her that their friend would be visiting today. The friend worked as a guard in the castle and seldom had a day off. Today, he decided that he would visit them.

They knew she had to change her hairstyle again. Their friend worked in the castle, and likely knew that, a few months ago, Ken had sent people searching for her.

They wouldn’t reveal her identity to him. She trusted them on that.

Saiko had offered to do her hair for her, and she had accepted.

”I’ll just move this hair to here,” She muttered as she brushed her bangs upwards to reveal her right eye. “And I think I’ll make your hair so that it has a little... curl at the top.”

So that was how Touka ended up with three sewing needles in her hair, with majority of her hair being pushed up to the top of her head. 

It didn’t look bad, but she was not used to this new hairstyle. Usually, she would just move her hair to the side and let it stay there.

”Took ‘im long enough,” Shirazu grunted. “Bastard hasn’t come see us for half a year. And he tells us to move here so he can ‘have an easier time’ visiting us. Bull dung, I tell ya.”

”At least he made a point to see us,” Tooru said. “He’s a really busy man.”

Shirazu grumbled something unintelligible as he plopped himself on the dining table.

”He better get here soon. I’m not waiting the whole day for him to show up.”

”Hope he gets here soon.” Touka said.

Time passed rather slowly. Saiko and Tooru were struggling to arrange the furniture to look good and Shirazu was not helping by sitting on the dining table and looking bored.

”Shiragin!” Saiko snapped. “You could at least make the house look a bit better!”

”Why should I?” He retorted. “He already knows how messy we get. I can guarantee that, by the end of today, the house will be twice as messy.”

While Saiko and Shirazu were noisily arguing, the front door’s knob rattled before someone knocked on the door.

”I think that’s him,” Touka muttered, rising from her chair to open the door.

She had never seen Urie before, but he looked rather strange to her.

His eyes were triangles and his pupils were rhombuses. He even had a head of purple hair.

Then again, the other three had different coloured hair, too. Shirazu even had sharp, shark-like teeth.

She raised her eyebrows. “You must be Urie, please, come in.”

The man glanced down at her large stomach before nodding his head and entering the house.

His attire showed his ranking in the castle. He wore a suit of iron armor and held his helmet in one hand, his other rested on the hilt of his sword.

”You could have told me where you lived when you sent the letters to me,” Urie complained to the rest. “I had to peek in other people’s windows.”

”We _did_ tell you where we were living!” Tooru protested. “Did you forget? We even had Saiko draw the house for you!”

Urie raised his eyebrows in amusement, but said nothing more as he took a seat on the dining table seat.

He eyes Touka up and down.

”When you said you were living with another person, I didn’t expect them to be pregnant.” He said curiously.

Touka’s cheeks reddened ever so slightly as she rubbed her belly. 

“How many months along?” Urie asked.

”Six,” She responded, watching gleefully as Saiko was digging through their pantries for something to eat. “Three more months.”

”The baby is really active,” Tooru remarked. “They kick a lot during the day.”

Urie nodded his head slowly before turning to glare at Shirazu, who had called him an insulting name.

Touka sighed as she walked down the stairs. She felt tired these days and would easily be drained after working for a short time at her job. She wasn’t maintaining a very healthy diet either. Her child took after Ken, a wolf, as evident by how she would crave meat, and sometimes be repulsed by vegetables. This added to her daily fatigue.

A nap was in order for her, though she doubted that she would get much sleep due to the commotion the others were stirring up downstairs.

* * *

Ken distinctly recalled that his mother had taught him the five stages of grief; Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance.

He remembered that she had told him that not everybody experiences the five stages in order, and that some people could completely skip certain stages and instantly be in one of the later stages.

As a child, he didn’t understand. Wasn’t everything supposed to go in order? Like how the guards would march about daily in a certain order.

As an adult however, he understood his mother’s words. Ever since Touka had gone missing, he felt that he had skipped over the beginning three stages and jumped right into the fourth stage; Depression.

The final stage would be Acceptance, but he didn’t know if he could ever reach that stage. The emptiness in his heart never went away, and there wasn’t a single day where he never cried, if only a few teardrops.

Sometimes, the emptiness was so drastic that he wondered if he still had a beating heart in his chest. At times, he would place his hand on his chest, just above his heart, to make sure that he still had a heart and was still alive.

Silently, he gazed out the window of his office, staring at the gardens.

For the briefest of moments, he felt joy in his chest, but it was replaced by a feeling of loss and loneliness as soon as it appeared.

The moments he shared with her were unforgettable. Every time he looked at a location of the castle where they had spent much time together or had created a special moment there, his heart would twist painfully and he would have look away, because he knew that if he stared for too long, he would start crying again.

It was also a reason why he had trouble sleeping in his bed at night. Her faint scent that still lingered on his bedsheets provided a small amount of comfort for him, but that comfort was soon lost. They had spent much time on his bed. It was a place that could guarantee absolute privacy for their most intimate acts.

He rubbed his tired face with his gloved hands. The bags under his eyes were dark and heavy from the consistent lack of sleep he had been getting. His body was also getting increasingly tired and lethargic from how fatigued he was. The lack of sleep and near daily training was taking its toll on his body.

How long could he go like this?

Would there ever be a day in his life again when he wasn’t haunted by nightmares of his beloved leaving him? Would there be a day when he could hold her in his arms again?

Would there be a day when he could be a father?

His hopes and dreams for the future had practically been crushed into dust at this point. The hope of ever seeing Touka again had become the smallest particle lingering in his mind. The hope of ever starting a family with her? Forget about it.

Sometimes, the voice at the back of his head would whisper. They would whisper the worst things that could have happened to her.

Once, he had started tearing up after the voice brought up the idea that she could have been kidnapped by those sick and murderous children. They would have demanded information from her regarding him and she would have refused, her ended up being tortured to death, just like how he had done with them in the past.

Was this karma?

Was this what he had to live with? All because he wanted to protect himself and her?

Had he not intervened, she likely would’ve been dead, and he would live forever in regret that he could not save her.

Was it that wrong to have protected someone he loved so dearly? Was it so wrong for him to ensure her survival so that he could start a family with her?

He received no answer for his questions.

 _Why?!_ He screamed in his head. Why did Fate have to play around with his life? What made his life so fun to mess around with?

Fate had stolen his parents, his childhood, his innocence, his own freedom. They even stole Touka. What’s worse was that he didn’t even know of her fate. He knew his parents’ fate, but not hers. She could be dead or dying from a slow and brutal torture, and he would be oblivious to it, still holding onto the tiny piece of hope that she was still alive.

It would have been easier for him to let go of that hope. Accept the fact that she would never come home and never be held in his arms again. Life would have been much easier if he accepted that. His fate would not have been so torturous.

But how could he?

How could he just let go of and forget about a woman who had brought him so much joy over the past year and a half?

He just couldn’t bring himself to do it.

So, he would choose to be selfish and self destructive. He would cling onto why tiny hope he had left and wait. 

_She’s not dead._

_She’s not dead._

_She’s not dead._

The words replayed in his head multiple times. Over and over again. He wouldn’t let go of this.

Maybe his pleas and chants would be enough for Fate to hear his cries.

* * *

Touka’s mind would wander every time she rubbed her swollen stomach. That was what Tooru had noticed even before her baby stomach had started to show.

He could remember her story as clear as day. How she was the Nameless King’s childhood friend and they had been reunited almost two years ago, which then escalated to a romantic relationship that resulted in her being pregnant with the king’s child. To not allow her baby to suffer shame and pain in life for being an illegitimate child, she had decided to run away.

It was obvious enough that Touka would think of the king each time she rubbed her stomach. No doubt thinking of him and where he would be now.

She had told him about the king’s personality. And he had felt sorry for the king. With a personality like that, he wouldn’t have taken her disappearance well at all. In fact, he would have probably thought that he was the reason for his disappearance.

It was not his life to live, but at times he would wonder how both Touka and the king’s life would be different if the king had been born, not as a king, but as a common person.

They may not have met. The fateful fire almost two decades ago had entwined and sealed their fates. Had he been a simple villager, a fire would have never broke out in his house lest caused by an accident. He wouldn’t have had to run countless miles with snow up to his snout and wouldn’t have been taken in by her.

Maybe, it was the best fate for them. At the very least, they had met and shared many precious moment with one another.

But, in Tooru’s opinion, it was also the worst possible fate. Their standing in society was a king and a mere maid. Their romantic relationship would have never been accepted and they would both have to face severe consequences if they had been caught.

Sometimes, he understood why Touka chose to leave, and sometimes he didn’t. But he never chose to ask himself why he understood her reasoning or not. It wasn’t his life to live, after all.

”Tooru,” Touka called gently from the seat in front of the fireplace, sensing his presence behind her. “What are you doing?”

Tooru shook his head to clear his thoughts, then gave her a smile. 

“Nothing. Just thinking.”

Touka had recently started to prefer sitting on the chair in front of the fireplace. It became more and more difficult for her to move around due to her increasing fatigue from being in the final month of pregnancy, and she even decided to quit her job for the time being until she was able to feed her baby cow’s milk. Then, each of them would have part of the day to look after the newborn.

She sighed quietly. “I hope the child is born healthy. I wouldn’t mind if they’re a girl or a boy, just for them to be healthy.”

”Touka,” Tooru said without even registering his words. “Do you ever think about him?”

The woman before her sighed again as she tilted her head back slightly. “Of course I do,” She whispered. “I think of him every day. I whisper apologies in my head and ask for forgiveness.” A bitter smile. “Not like he could hear them.”

She drew a shaky breath before going on. “He always wanted a family. Having lost his own, he just wanted a family to love and care for.” She said. “No matter how much he wants one with me, I just can’t allow our baby to suffer through humiliation and shame for me being their mother. I know I was and still am being selfish, and I robbed him of the chance to have a family.”

A shake of her head and a hand that wiped away the little tears forming in the corners of her eyes. “He would never forgive me. Maybe, if he sees me in the Heavens, he would ask why. But I don’t know what I’ll tell him by then.” She answered honestly, pouring out every thought she had of him since the fateful day nine months ago. “I think, by then, he wouldn’t even remember me. Years would have passed before either of us entered the Heavens. He would probably have taken a wife and had children with her, and I would become nothing else but a passing thought in his mind.”

Tooru frowned. His heart throbbed painfully as she poured her feelings out into words. She still loved him very, very dearly. 

“And... are you alright with that...?” He asked.

Touka was silent, and Tooru knew that he had stepped over a line. He was about to apologise for intruding in on her privacy when she gave her response.

”I would have to live with it,” She whispered faintly. “I’ve already caused him so much grief. I don’t have the right to take more away from him when I’ve already taken so much.”

There was the faintest crack in her voice as she said that. Tooru had never heard Touka’s voice crack before, neither had he seen her cry from grief.

For some reason, he thought that she was grateful that her back was to him. For all he knew, she could be silently crying now as she rubbed her stomach.

He wouldn’t invade her privacy anymore. He had done too much to her with two questions.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lmao Urie and Shirazu are the surnames but I’m not used to calling them Ginshi And Kuki. And y’all best be getting ready for the coming chapters hehehehe.


	27. Child

It started with a dull ache in her abdomen when she first woke up, but somewhere lower. Where her baby was.

Then, Touka immediately knew. Her baby would be coming today.

”I think we have to go to Kanou today,” Touka said calmly. The pain wasn’t so bad yet, but she knew it was better to be safe than sorry. 

Saiko turned and raised an eyebrow, holding the wooden spatula above the metal pan. “Why? Do you feel uncomfortable anywhere?”

”Is the baby coming?” Shirazu asked tiredly, his head against the dining table.

”I think so,” Touka replied. “I’ve been feeling a dull ache since I woke up.”

Shirazu leapt out of the seat, all sleepiness had seemingly vanished into thin air.

”Really?”

”I believe so.”

Tooru frowned. “Then we should get a midwife or the doctor here soon.”

”Doesn’t Kanou have them?” Saiko said while shoving the eggs she had been cooking down her throat. “Midwives?”

”I guess? He is a doctor, after all.” Touka said while taking her seat on her favourite chair in front of the fireplace. The pain was slowly increasing by the second.

Shirazu bolted from his seat and scrambled out the door while screaming that he would get the midwife as soon as possible.

Touka flashed a confused look. “I don’t understand why he’s so worked up. It could be a few hours before the baby is born yet.”

Saiko hurried over to Touka side and ushered her out of the chair. “Well, it is a baby. Exciting news—and go lie down on the bed, you’re not giving going to give birth while sitting on a chair, are you?”

Touka noted that Tooru and Saiko were taking this quite well as she climbed up the wooden staircase, which created slightly under her.

Soon, she was lying in bed, and her midwife had arrived with a frantic looking Shirazu.

”It’s not even his baby,” Saiko whispered to Tooru. “What’s he getting so panicked about?”

The midwife, Kimi, was calm and rather kind. She had requested for hot water and towels to be prepared for the newborn baby and had even prayed for the survival of both mother and child.

As time went on, Touka’s face scrunched up. The pain was awful now, like someone was continuously kicking her in the stomach.

”Painful, is it not?” Kimi said kindly.

She nodded, rubbing her stomach.

The woman in front of her smiled as she tucked her brown hair behind one ear. “Birthing is not an easy process. Many women tend to scream from the pain while giving birth.”

Touka knew that well enough. She could still remember her own mother giving birth to her younger brother, her screams were so loud that Touka had been certain that their little house would have broken down. 

“It’s nothing much now,” the midwife warned. “Once the bag of water in you breaks, that’s when the real pain starts. You have to be ready for this. Are you ready?”

Why wouldn’t she be ready? She had waited nine long months for this baby. She was more than ready to meet her baby. 

* * *

Touka knew she was ready to meet her baby, but she wasn’t ready for the pain that she was experiencing.

The pain had gotten worse and worse until her vision turned white and it felt as if someone had stabbed a burning pitchfork into her stomach and was digging it deeper and deeper.

She could vaguely see and hear now. The pain was so bad that it seemed to have dulled every other sense other than feeling.

She could smell something metallic, feel something warm on her grasped hand, distinctly see a few coloured blobs in her vision and hear a distant scream which she assumed was her own. She could also feel as if something was being dragged or pulled out of her at a tortuously slow pace. Something wet on her face.

Pain was all her mind could register at this moment, as if a hundred swords had been pierced into her lower body and she was left to bleed out.

For a moment, her thoughts drifted to the past. Ken had called her a strong woman and able to endure pain well. She remembered laughing and saying that she wouldn’t be enduring pain all that well if she ever became pregnant, recounting the memories of her mother that night.

And Ken had given her such a warm smile, yet it held some form of sadness to it. He had kissed the crown of her head and whispered that he would be there for her if she ever gave birth to a baby.

She had failed to understand the sadness in his smile then, but she understood it now. At the time, he was unsure if he would have a future with her, and seemed to have thought she would be pregnant with another man’s child.

” _I’m here_ ,” His voice whispered in her ear. Just like how he did so many times when she felt down about something, or was in pain from her monthly cycles.

Somehow, it felt like he was there. Standing there in all of his glory and looking at her with a smile on his scarred face. Her hazy mind seemed to make out a vision of him there. 

Her mind drifted again, thinking whether this would be what she saw if he had been born the same as her; as a simple civilian and not a king. Would he be standing here with her while they awaited for their child, had he been born a simple man?

Her thoughts were interrupted by a sudden burst of intense pain, and she was jolted from her thoughts back into reality. She was giving birth now, and there was no time for her to let her mind wander when her baby’s life could be at stake.

It felt like it went on for hours before it finally dulled. 

The distant screams she heard stopped and the coloured blobs were moving around frantically. A voice was calling out to her. The warmth on her hand disappeared.

Touka flinched when she saw something white approach her, but relaxed when she felt that it was a cloth that was dabbing at her eyes. Apparently she cried while birthing her child.

Her vision was still hazy, but she could see more clearly now.

The ringing in her ears slowly disappeared, and she was vaguely aware of another scream. The scream of a baby.

Her hazy mind first screamed at her to sit up and she did attempt to, but was quickly pushed down by a small weight on her chest.

Whatever was put on her was a bundled up, screaming pink thing. She quickly realised it was her baby, born safely and without any issue.

Her hands felt like lead, but she managed to move them to touch her baby. The baby was still screaming and wailing as Touka moved her hand to caress them gently.

”It’s a girl!” Someone said, probably Saiko. “It’s Ichika!”

A baby girl.

Touka managed a weak smile as her vision adjusted to Ichika’s strange multi coloured hair. White, with black erupting from the crown of her head.

For a moment, she thought of Ken. Their hairstyles were so similar.

A brief moment of sadness passed through her, but it was replaced by reluctance as Kimi moved to take her baby away from her.

”You need rest,” She said. “Your baby will be here when you wake up. Don’t worry about it.”

Touka let her head fall back against her feather pillow. She was exhausted and her lower body ached terribly, but she felt a tremendous amount of joy.

Nine long months she had waited to meet her baby and she finally did today.

Distantly, she could hear Kimi talking to the other three, no doubt telling them what they needed to do to ensure Touka received proper rest and, probably, how to take care of a baby.

The birth finally over, Touka closed her eyes and allowed darkness to take over her. The area beneath her lower body was wet and bloody and gross but she didn’t care, she was just too tired.

* * *

When Touka awoke, she was bemused to find that her bedsheets felt clean and new, then she realised she wasn’t in her own room.

It was Tooru’s room.

She sat up slowly, wincing at the ache in her lower body and looked around. Where was her baby?

Every sense of her was much clearer than before and she felt rather refreshed.

She threw the covers off of herself and was, again, bemused to find that her clothes had been changed, too. She was now wearing a blue dress with white sleeves that stretched all the way to her ankles.

Experimentally, she lifted her legs, finding slight difficulty in doing so. She would probably have to rest for a few more hours before being able to walk again.

A wail teared through the air, and she almost tumbled out of the bed from how she jumped.

”What!?” She hears Shirazu scream. “What does she want!?”

”DOES IT LOOK LIKE I KNOW?!” Tooru shouted back. “DO I LOOK LIKE A MOTHER TO YOU!?”

”Shut up!” came Saiko’s shrill voice. “Someone go see if Touka is up! Maybe she can do something!”

Touka could hear someone thundering up the stairs and the crying growing increasingly louder before the door threw open, revealing Shirazu holding a wailing Ichika.

”What does she want?!” He asked again while darting his gaze back and forth between Ichika and Touka.

Touka held her hands out for her baby, and Shirazu scrambled across the room to gently—not really—hand her the wailing baby.

Ichika’s skin still had a pink tinge to it, her eyes were shut tightly as she cried, waving her little hands in the air and pinching her little fingers.

She coddled the baby in her arms, gently rocking her back and forth while whispering comforting words. She remembered that her own mother had done this when Ayato wouldn’t stop crying. Most of the times it worked. 

Her baby calmed down in her arms, and was soon reduced to a whimpering fit. 

A quiet voice in the back of her head—which she assumed was her maternal instinct—was telling her that her baby was hungry.

Shirazu had left the room just as Touka brought her baby towards her breast.

Sure enough, her baby quieted down and began suckling on her breast. In that moment, her eyes had opened slightly to look up at Touka.

Ichika had Ken’s eyes. Just as silver and gray as she remembered his eyes to be. Again, she was reminded of one of the moments in life she had shared with her former lover. 

Her memories of his eyes were always bright and happy when he was around her. If she knew him well enough, his eyes were probably dull and stormy now.

She wondered if he was still hoping that he could find her. Or if he had given up and had accepted his fate.

Her baby pulling away from her drove her out of her thoughts. She was so small and tiny, but seemingly healthy.

Touka wondered if Ken would be proud of his daughter if he knew that she existed. Knowing him, he would probably be beaming now. He had always told her that he loved children and would want some of his own some day.

Now, he had one. He just wasn’t aware of her existence.

And he would never know his first daughter. That was what Touka hoped for.

* * *

Ken sighed as he tore open the envelope. It was another letter to inform him of where this year’s Kings’ Meeting would be held.

Nothing much had happened in his own kingdom so far, so the possibility of Kingdom Goat being the meeting area was slim.

He read the letter. As expected, it wasn’t his kingdom. What was unexpected though, was that Kingdom CCG would be the meeting kingdom this year.

This was puzzling to Ken. Kingdom CCG had some of the best trained soldiers, so for Kingdom CCG to be the meeting kingdom this year was rather odd. For the meeting to actually be schedule there, it must mean that something horrible had happened to Amon’s soldiers or higher ups.

He stared at the letter, scanning the cursive words for the time left to the meeting.

Two months.

He leaned back in his chair and stared up at the ceiling.

He really didn’t want to attend that meeting. 

He had a kingdom to protect from insane and murderous children. His own soldiers could die from trying to protect his kingdom, and thousands could potentially be slaughtered in his absence.

Then again, their target was him, so the chance was unlikely. However, that didn’t mean that they wouldn’t use his citizens against him.

Too much was at stake here. His own life, his citizens’ lives, and more. 

But, maybe the Kings’ Meeting would help him come up with some solutions to this bloody problem. 

He would—had to—go.

He yawned as he pressed his forehead against the flat surface of his desk. His hand moved up to rub at his masked face while he blinked his tears away.

Touka wouldn’t be at this year’s Kings’ Meeting.

Almost ten months had passed since he lost her, and he still wasn’t over it at all. He knew that he would probably never get over her, evident by the constant ache he felt in his broken heart daily.

Ten months.

Amon, Yoshimura and Shachi had promised to write to him if they found any trace of her whatsoever. The only king who didn’t seem to care much about it was Matsuri, which caused Ken to initially assume that the Washuu King had kidnapped his beloved and was using her for their own disgusting reproductive methods. But he laughed at the thought soon after. The Washuu were not people who would reproduce with a woman that was not of their own. They considered women that were not part of their bloodline to be ‘impure’.

_”I-I saw her a-at Cochlea! It’s a village near K-Kingdom CCG!”_

He frowned, remembering the child’s words before he had mercilessly beheaded him. 

A small seed of doubt had implanted itself into his heart when he thought of the child’s words.

What if he had been telling the truth? 

What if Ken had listened to him that time, and had ordered his higher ups to search for her again?

He chuckled humorlessly to himself. Who was he kidding? Shuu had already scoured that village once and reported nothing, not even her distinct and easily recognisable scent.

Then again, some part of him was itching to go look for her himself. That part of him was telling him that the child had, indeed, been telling the truth, telling him that he should go search for her.

For what seemed like the millionth time in his whole life, his internal thoughts clashed against one another, two sides fighting over to force him to make a decision.

_Go! She’s living there!_

_No! That blasted child will lead you there and have his comrades take you! Once you’re there, they’ll seize you!_

Which side of him was he supposed to follow? The one that represented his desires to meet and continue a future with Touka, or the one that represented his doubts and survival instincts?

Cochlea was a humble village near Kingdom CCG. If he wanted to see if she was really there, he could easily walk there on his own.

However, Kingdom CCG was the selected kingdom for the meeting this year, meaning something had happened to Anon and his soldiers, which could mean that the children had set up base nearby and were designating their attacks on Kingdom CCG.

His thoughts were colliding with one another so much that he was starting to get a slight headache.

He groaned as he raised his head from his desk.

He would visit Cochlea one time on his way to Kingdom CCG. 

One time.

If he didn’t catch wind of her scent or her presence, he would leave immediately, then live on forever with a shattered heart.

It was the only thing he could do at this point. The only thing to confirm that she had just vanished into thin air.

The last thing he could do to attempt to save his broken heart.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That one dark ass side of me was contemplating killing off Touka after she gave birth. Then I went “wtf?”
> 
> And, I’m leaving for a trip on next Saturday, so after that day I probably won’t be posting for almost 2 weeks.


	28. Taken Back

Touka reached into the baby crib to gently calm her fussy baby.

For the past two months she had experienced motherhood, she found that it was rather difficult, even with three other people helping her.

Ichika would be quiet during the day, and fuss during the night. Especially at midnight.

At times, Touka couldn’t do much of anything. Ichika would fuss and fuss despite being full, having a clean cloth nappy, and being swaddled in a comfy blanket.

Sometimes, she would spend hours patting her baby’s back and it would do little to soothe the whining baby. Sometimes, the other three would offer their help and she would be able to sleep a few hours before having to wake up to feed Ichika.

A few times, the thought of Ichika having no father to cling to being her reasons for fussing came to Touka’s mind. But how was a two month old baby supposed to tell who her parents were?

Even now, she couldn’t understand the reasons behind her daughter’s constant crying, despite being fine in the same conditions during the day.

An arm supported Ichika’s bottom, and her other gently patted her back.

The only thing that she could be thankful about in regards to Ichika’s crying was that it wasn’t too loud, meaning the other three would be able to sleep well when the little one started crying again during the night.

”Shh...” She whispered tiredly while rocking her baby back and forth. “It’s alright, Mama’s here...”

Ichika continued to make whining and gurgling noises, unhappy with something that Touka could not do anything to help with.

”I know, I know...” Touka murmured.

She was exhausted at this point. It was well past midnight and she had not gotten any sleep because Ichika hadn’t been crying for so long.

”Please, Ichika,” Touka whispered. “If it’s because your Papa isn’t here, then I’m sorry. It was for your own good...”

Ichika stopped. Touka quickly adjusted her so that she could inspect what was wrong with her baby.

Brilliant silver eyes were looking back at her, wet from the tears, but still brilliant looking.

”I’m sorry, Ichika,” Touka whispered, kissing Ichika’s forehead. “I’m sorry you have to grow up not knowing your real father...”

* * *

Ken stood outside his castle, his black cloak flew in the air behind him. He sighed as he stared at the barely sun rising behind his kingdom.

He would be gone for about a week, and would leave his citizens alone. He prayed that no attacks would occur during his time away; he would hate for anything to happen to his innocent citizens.

The journey to Kingdom CCG would take almost a full day, and they would take periodic breaks in between in order to rest their horses and his carriage driver.

“My King,” Shuu told him. “It is time for you to board the carriage.”

He had stepped inside the carriage without a word to his higher up.

His heart was beating unusually fast today. It was a mix between anticipation, excitement, and melancholy. He knew that it wasn’t because he was anxious for the meetings, but rather if he could see Touka again or not.

Today would be the day when his remaining heart pieces would either be shattered into complete dust, or he would begin to piece the fragments back again.

He could only hope that the latter would happen today.

Was he ready to meet her again, if he could? Would he be emotionally prepared to find that he would never see her again?

He tried not to keep his hopes up high, knowing full well that if he stepped foot into Cochlea with high hopes, he would inevitably walk out ready to die if she wasn’t there.

His fingered drummed absentmindedly on his lap as he stared out the small window in his carriage, wondering what could possibly happen in Cochlea.

Time flew by as he lived in his thoughts, and soon, they were at the first village where they would take a break.

”Water, sir?” Hide offered as the king stepped out of the carriage.

”Yes, please.” Ken said, taking the water canteen from his higher up. He untied his mask and sipped the water through the canteen.

He let out a heavy sigh as he pocketed one of his hands and stared at the sun again. It was still rising, a few more hours to noon.

He turned to look at one of the village houses. Would Touka be in one of these houses? Would she be alright? 

A dark fear of his was that he would find her with a baby. A baby that wasn’t his, and a baby that she did not want. Perhaps, he would find her forced into some strange marriage or something.

It wasn’t long before Nishiki is shooing him back onto the carriage. It was time for them to leave the break point, and move on to the next.

He continued his cycle of staring out of the window until the next break point, then the next, and then the next. Each time when he stepped out of the carriage, he would take a long and slow sip of water from his canteen, then stare at the sun.

The sun was only beginning to set when his eyes widen.

There it was.

A scent that he had not smelled for so long, yet he could easily identify it.

Her scent.

He had bolted upright from his seat and kicked the tiny door down, then leapt out and tumbled onto the grass before immediately rising and breaking out into a sprint, heading towards the direction of her.

”M-My King?!” His higher ups shrieked.

”Go to the next break point first!” He yelled, not even turning back. “I’ll meet you there later!”

His mind had one goal; finding her.

Somewhere in between him running and desperately keeping track of the scent, he had shifted and was bolting at full speed.

He didn’t know how long he had ran for, but soon he was seeing a village in the horizon.

Cochlea.

He had shifted back into human form before his large size could tear down any of the houses. His nose led him to a single, three storey house.

He came to a skidding halt before the door and slammed his fist against the door.

”Open up!” He barked.

The door opened slowly, and he was greeted by a short man with incredibly green hair. 

“O-Oh, n-no...” the man whispered in fear.

Ken glared down at the short man through his visible eye. His height alone was enough to intimidate the other man, and it was clear that he was visibly shaken by him. Why was there a man here?

”Tooru, what bastard is at the—“ 

Ken tore his gaze from the man at the door to the second man who had just appeared. This time, a head of hair as orange as a carrot with two ends sticking out like a rabbit’s ears. This man had froze upon seeing him, too.

The green haired man turned to mouth something to the other before scrambling upstairs.

Ken openly stared at the man standing beyond the door, as if asking him ‘ _well?_ ’

The other man had fled the scene as well, dashing upstairs and screaming.

”He’s here!” Ken heard. “That king is here!”

He could hear someone, a female, shushing him, and whispering something. He could hear something along the lines of ‘ _hide her._ ’

And, his breath was caught in his throat.

She came down.

Touka was walking down the stairs now, her head bowed down slightly and she refused to meet his heavy gaze. He didn’t take note, just marveling at how she was still as beautiful as the last time he had seen her, even though she looked drained of energy.

She walked slowly until she was in front of him, though from a distance. Her head still low and her eyes still looking at her bare feet.

”Wh—“ she started, immediately being cut off as Ken wrapped his arms around her tightly, squeezing her so hard that she was lifted off the floor.

Tears flowed freely from his eyes as he buried his face into her shoulder.

”You’re here...” He whispered hoarsely, voice breaking. “You’re alive...”

He felt her arms wrap around him loosely and gingerly, and he sighed into her shoulder and closed his eyes to relish the small moment.

Then, he heard a baby crying. And the entire moment for him had just shattered into oblivion.

His head rose from Touka’s shoulder to glare at the floor above them. Then, his eyes slowly wandered back to Touka, who had froze completely.

Ken felt his anger rising. It had already begun to emerge the moment he saw that it was not Touka who had answered the door, but another man.

And now, a baby.

A baby that was the spawn of one of the men living here.

Anger and jealousy took over his body as he pushed past Touka and stormed up the stairs, ignoring her pleas to stop and allow her to explain.

He saw red as he slammed open every door in an attempt to find where the baby was.

”Ken, stop!” Touka yelled, still struggling to hold back her former lover.

Normally, he would be listening. However, he was so consumed by rage that her words went in one ear and flew out the other.

He wouldn’t hurt the baby. He wasn’t that horrible of a person. But that didn’t mean that he wouldn’t attempt to harm the father.

Finally, he kicked down the remaining room, instantly behind overwhelmed with Touka’s scent coming form it, indicating that it was her room.

He ignored it, focusing on the other three in the room; the two men from before, and a petite woman with light blue hair. For a brief second, his mind argued that the baby could have been the other woman’s, but he didn’t listen.

They instantly scrambled back from the baby cot the moment he had entered the room. Once he was satisfied that they were a good distance away, he directed his attention towards the baby cot, intent on finding out which of the two men fathered this child.

His hand slammed against the back of the cot and he looked down at the crying baby.

Then, his anger washed away into confusion. 

The child didn’t look like any of the two men. They didn’t have dark green or orange hair. They didn’t have black, beady eyes or brown ones.

The baby had white hair, with black emerging from the crown of their head. Their eyes were silver, just like...

He inhaled a deep breath and looked up just to make sure none of the men had silver eyes. They didn’t. Then, he slowly turned towards Touka, who was standing at the doorway, cupping her face with her hands.

Touka turned to the other three. “C-Can you leave the house for a moment...? I have to have a word with the king.”

They left without question, and it was just the two of them left in the room of the now empty house.

”Touka...?” Ken breathed, knowing that she would understand what his question was.

She had slowly wandered towards the cot to pick up the crying baby and comfort them before giving a sigh.

”...I never wished for you to meet her...” Touka whispered. “It would have been too hard on the both of you... but... what can I do now? When you’re already here?”

Ken breathed her name and slowly walked towards her, the dreadful excitement in his heart was growing.

”Ken,” Touka sighed. “I’ll just tell it to you... this is your daughter, Ichika.”

He blinked once, then twice, then he pinched himself to confirm that he was not in a dream.

For him, the day could not get much better. He had found his lover, and just found out that he had a child with her. 

It was all he ever wanted.

”R-Really...?” He whispered.

”...yes...” Touka murmured.

He reached towards his baby, gently stroking her cheek with a shaky hand.

”C-Can I...?”

Touka gave a small smile before gingerly handing the baby to her father. 

Ichika had stopping whimpering the moment she had been brought to Ken’s arms, and she was now curiously staring at the man holding her.

Ken let his mind wander as he stared into his daughter’s silver eyes that mirrored his own. 

It would have been a nice life; living with Touka and their daughter, raising her together and just having a simple life here where they would grow old and die together after Ichika was old enough to start a family of her own.

Then, his heart dropped in dread as he remembered the reason that led him to Touka.

If one of the bastard children knew where she was, how many of them were also aware of her location? Even worse, were they aware that the baby here was the baby of the king?

One of them could be watching them right now. They could realise that the baby was the daughter of the king and were ready to take off to report it to their leader.

He couldn’t let them take away his family. He wouldn’t let them.

”Touka,” He said seriously. “Listen to me. You cannot live here anymore.”

She frowned and glared at him, as if daring him to continue his statement. 

“And why?” She said slowly, angrily.

Ken wasn’t deterred in the slightest. He knew Touka’s personality, and knew that he would be put up with some resistance from her.

”Touka... listen,” Ken replied slowly. “I found you through information given to me by one of the Oggai. If one of them knows where you are, how many of them know? How many of them know that this baby is mine?”

He could see the features on her face freeze and her eyes begin to focus in concentration, thinking about the possibilities that could happen.

”They could be watching now,” Ken continued, determined to convince her to leave with him. “If I leave now, they could come for you. For her,” He said, looking down at their daughter. “It’s not safe anymore.”

Touka still remained silent.

”I don’t want to lose the both of you. Please. Come with me.” Ken urged.

”...what about them?” Touka asked quietly, referring to the other three standing outside of the house.

”With you gone, they shouldn’t be in any danger.” Ken said. “If they know about our daughter, they’ll target the both of you and leave the other three. If you come with me, all of you will be safer.”

She thought about it. Again, it would be the best choice she had. Allow her and her baby to be safe with Ken while allowing her friends to stay alive. If she chose to stay here, god knows what they would have to eventually face.

“...fine.” Touka said.

She wasn’t happy with the choice she had to make, but if it meant that her baby would be safe, then she was willing to go through with it.

“Let’s go,” Ken said softly, leading her out of the house.

”Touka?” Saiko called worriedly, taking her hand. “What’s wrong?”

Touka gave a sad smile and squeezed Saiko’s hands. “I’m sorry. I have to leave...”

“Leave?” Tooru asked, slightly alarmed. “What do you mean?”

”Tooru’s right. What gives?” Shirazu demanded.

Touka opened her mouth to speak, but Ken beat her to it.

”The three of you will be safer without her here, and she, and our daughter, would be safer with me.” Ken said. 

“B-But why...?” Saiko whispered, her bottom lip quivering. “Why now... after Ichika was born?”

”Saiko...” Touka murmured, hugging the short woman close to her. “I’m sorry... it’s for the best.”

”W-Why?” Tooru asked. “Why is it for the best?”

Touka pursed her lips. She didn’t know if they knew about the Oggai, but she would keep them in the dark about it. They couldn’t know that, if she were to stay, they could die trying to defend themselves.

”I-I’ll try to visit you guys...” Touka said meekly. “When this entire situation is over, I’ll try to visit... with Ichika...”

”What situation?” Shirazu demanded, stepping closer to Touka. “What situation is so severe that you have to leave us and go with—with him?!” He shouted, pointing an accusing finger at Ken, who had narrowed his eyes.

”I-I can’t say. I-I don’t want to hurt the t-three of you...” Touka said, clutching Saiko tighter.

”Why?!” Shirazu continued. “If ya don’t wanna hurt us, then tell us the truth!”

By this point, Shirazu’s loud screams had attracted the attention of the other people living within the village, who were peeking through their doors and windows.

Ken knew that the longer they stayed here, the more trouble it would bring. He had to end this. Now.

”Touka, we have to go,” Ken said quietly, placing his free hand on Touka’s shoulder, urging her quietly.

”NO!” Shirazu yelled. “I AIN’T GOING TO LET YOU GO UNTIL YOU GIVE ME THE REASON WHY YOU—“

A wave of fear washed over Shirazu when he had looked into the King’s visible eye. It was only then that he knew that he should’ve shut his mouth ages ago.

The king was much taller than he was, already an imposing figure. He could easily wipe the other man off the face of the earth with just a simple command of his higher ups. The severe glare that he was giving to Shirazu, combined with the mask, was enough to make him shrink away in panic and fear.

”...are you finished?” The king asked softly, dangerously, like the blade of a well sharpened knife. “Can we leave?” 

Shirazu said nothing, his head was threatening to lower in sign of submission. 

Ken took that as a ‘yes’.

”Come on,” Ken said tenderly. “The others are waiting for me.”

Touka was reminded that it was time for the Kings’ Meeting. She would be brought to one of the Kingdoms and into one of the castles.

A castle with four other kings, and with multiple higher ups who were basically considered royalty.

What would they think of Ken, and their daughter when they saw them? 

She couldn’t hide her anxiety and nervousness from Ken. He knew immediately that something was wrong when they had gone a far distance away from Cochlea. And he knew it wasn’t about leaving her friends.

”Touka?” Ken called worriedly, placing a hand on her shoulder. “What’s wrong?”

Her breathing was heavy as she went through all the possible scenarios that could occur. Sure, Ken would attempt to protect them, but even he couldn’t defend them forever.

Her eyes darted to the sleeping baby in Ken’s arms, then to him, then back at her baby.

”It’s alright,” Ken assured, as if reading her mind. “I won’t let them harm the both of you.”

His words placed her heart at an ever so slight ease.

”We have to meet the others. They’re at Cornucopia.” He said. “I think they’ll be surprised.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do y’all want the blurb of the Vampire Fic? If so I’ll type it out at the end of the next chapter.


	29. Sudden Changes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m back! So sorry for the long wait for this chapter. I’ve been tired from my trip and writer’s block decided to slap me across the face when I finally started writing again. :P enjoy the chapter!

When Cornucopia, another village close to Kingdom CCG, was in view, Touka started to panic. 

Her mind was clouded by thoughts of the worst cases that could happen.

She could see Ken’s higher ups and servants in the distance. Some were waving to him, some were talking with the servants. She wondered if they could see the baby.

”Don’t worry,” Ken assured her again.

Her lips pursed again and she frowned. 

Time passed too soon and she was already standing before the higher ups, who were staring at her questionably.

”Touka?” Hide called, his mouth gaping loosen as if he couldn’t believe that she was standing there. 

She gave a weak smile in return, struggling to not shrink back from the stares she was receiving.

Their attention quickly diverted away from her to Ichika.

”M-My King...” Shuu began. “Whose child is this...?”

Touka had noticed that Shuu was different from a year ago. She could tell from the way he spoke; an air of fear in his words, as if he feared that simply speaking would result in his head being ripped off.

”My daughter,” Ken said simply, staring at Shuu.

Now that she looked carefully, Ken’s eyes were different. A year ago, he would look at her and almost everyone else with a look of kindness and warmth. Now, those eyes seemed to have faded away when he looked at others.

”Daughter!?” Nishiki almost yelled. “How?!”

Ken turned his gaze towards Nishiki, whose posture had bent slightly the moment it happened.

”Do I need to explain how a man and woman conceive a child?” Ken said sarcastically.

Nobody said anything, and Touka was left to feel that uncomfortable silence and awkwardness in the air once again.

”Come,” He said. “We have to get to Kingdom CCG now.”

His servants and higher ups obliged, hurriedly rushing to the carriage and their horses.

Ken had ushered Touka into his carriage, which she felt awkward about. She used to be a servant, and sitting in the servants’ carriage was more familiar to her than sitting in the king’s carriage. Here, she just felt out of place.

They sat opposite of one another, each staring at something in random directions.

Occasionally, Ichika would coo, and Ken would instantly have his attention on her, which Touka found sweet. She never imagined him to be the fatherly type.

It was a long period of time before either of them spoke. And when they did, it was Ken who first started their conversation.

”...was it because of her?” He asked softly, looking down at Ichika. “Did you leave me because of her...?”

Touka looked away and gave a heavy sigh. Her eyes grew distant as she stared out the small window, thinking back to the very first day she had ran away from the castle.

”What gave you that idea?” She asked quietly, wanting to know how he had figured it out so quickly.

He let out a humourless chuckle, as if he had the answer planned way before she even asked the question.

”You knew the whole time that I would want a family with you,” He said distantly. “Yet, every time I brought up the topic of children or marriage, you would look away, like you didn’t want to talk about it.” He paused to coddle Ichika closer to himself. “I thought you had been kidnapped... or killed. But, I knew the answer when I saw her.”

Touka turned her head towards him, flashing him a sad and bitter smile. “Then you understand the reason why I decided to leave.”

Ken remained silent, and Touka knew that he understood the reason for her sudden disappearance on that day.

”...it hurt me,” Ken admitted bitterly. “There wasn’t a day that went by that I didn’t think of you.” He sighed. “And ever since you left me, I haven’t been able to sleep well.”

Touka stared at the heavy bags beneath his eyes. They were dark and almost blue. He was exhausted.

”I’m sorry... for the pain I’ve caused you,” Touka whispered, finding it hard to speak after what he had said. “I was selfish... refusing to confide in you about it and leaving you alone and heartbroken.”

They didn’t speak much after that, both of them chose to remain silent for the remainder of the ride to Kingdom CCG.

They were greeted by King Amon at the entrance of the castle, who raised his eyebrows at the sight of the little bundle in Ken’s arms.

”Yours?” Amon enquired, not even bothering to comment on Ken’s hair colour change.

”What do you think?” Ken said almost in monotone.

”We speak more after the meeting,” Touka heard Amon murmur to Ken as he sauntered past. “Show the Nameless King to his room, Shio!”

”Got it!” A young boy chirped, rushing over to Ken before marching in the direction that was the king’s bedroom.

Ken was gently pulling Touka along by the hand. There was really no other place  in the castle for her other than with him. 

Maybe she would lock herself in his room for the entire one week duration of this meeting.

The not named Shio peered at the small bundle in Ken’s arms. “Yusa, Rikai, get the baby cot!” He hollered.

In a few short moments, two other young boys were trotting behind them, heaving around a small baby cot with them.

”Your room!” Shio said happily, opening the door for the king. The other two places the cot down in the room before running off with Shio in tow.

The room was nothing short of grand, fitting for a king. 

She had seen three separate rooms for Ken in three separate kingdoms. Each held the same level of grandness and she was never tired of seeing it.

However, today, all she wanted to do was just curl up in some dark corner and shut the world out. But, she didn’t do that. She just stared out of the window by the bedside.

The sound of Ken falling down on the bed distracted her and she turned to find that he had planted himself face down on the bed.

His head turned slightly, just enough for him to speak with no difficulty.

”I’m exhausted...” He murmured.

”Then, sleep.” Touka replied gently, seeing no reason why he shouldn’t be able to sleep now. She was here, and he was on a comfortable bed.

He sat up and gently untied the strings on his mask, revealing his face. 

His fatigue was more evident now that both of his eyes were visible. He had a paler face from the lack of sleep over the past year, and overall seemed to have died a little on the inside.

”I can’t,” Ken whispered, rubbing his eyes. “My body won’t let me.”

“Why?” The words tumbled out.

”I-It just won’t. I’ve tried everything, and nothing worked.”

Touka felt horrible. Did her abrupt departure affect him this much? Did he worry so much to the point he had not slept much for so long?

Slowly, she approached the bed and sat next to the king. 

She found the words she wanted to say stuck in her throat, unable to even force them out. 

So, she had just gotten beneath the covers and opened her arms, like how she used to do when they were still together.

He had buried his face in her neck without hesitation and wrapped his arms tightly around her small waist. He sighed contently as she ran her fingers through his jet black hair.

It felt awkward yet natural at the same time. She hadn’t touched or spoke to him in a year, and everything was just uncomfortable now. But not this, it reminded her of the the private times they would spend with each other.

A hand of hers continued to run through his black hair while another gently rubbed patterns on his back. Usually, this would be enough to get him into a deep sleep, so Touka was surprised that Ken was still awake even after ten minutes of continuous motion.

”Aren’t you tired?” She asked. “Won’t you go to sleep?”

His eyes were half lidded, almost closing, and his breathing had grown shallow. But he still fought sleep.

”...I’m scared that... if I sleep now, I’ll wake up, and realise today was a dream,” He murmured tiredly. “Finding you... meeting our daughter... everything would be a dream...”

He yawned as he continued to fight the sleep that he so desperately needed. Touka felt guilt wash over her like a tsunami after he had said that. He was so frightened and worried that today would have just been his mind toying with him... again.

”I’m real,” She whispered. “I’ll be here when you wake up. I won’t go anywhere.”

The words seemed to have comforted him, because his eyes shut and he was snoring a few seconds after.

* * *

For the first three seconds when Ken woke up, he realised that he had actually slept peacefully for the first time in almost a full year. After that, he realised he woke up because he heard a baby crying.

Touka was struggling to push him off of her, and she broke free because Ken had rolled to the side to allow her to reach Ichika.

And he also forgot that he was now a father to a two month old baby.

For starters, he had never been a father before, so he had no idea how he had to react in a situation where his own daughter was crying.

So, he settled on observing for now, watching Touka lift the wailing baby out of the crib and place her over her shoulder, patting the infant’s back in a soothing manner. She was even whispering comforting words.

It didn’t work, though, and Ken was wondering if Touka was doing something wrong.

Then again, she had always been the maternal type, so probably not.

”Touka,” He called. “Let me try.”

What was he getting himself into? He had never even calmed a young child before, let alone his own baby. For all he knew, he could end up making everything worse.

She seemed hesitant, but handed him the baby anyways.

It felt natural to hold Ichika. He realised that when he had first held her tiny body in his arms.

Slowly, he rocked his arms back and forth, watching as Ichika’s cries dulled to a soft whimpering, then to silence.

”How...?” Touka pondered, lips parted. “I could never get her to quiet down by doing something like that. She would cry continuously until she tired herself out.”

Ken shrugged slowly, his eyes still fixed on Ichika.

He would have stood there all day, coddling his daughter and being with Touka, but he couldn’t. Not when he had duties and meetings to attend to.

A knock on his door caused him the groan. 

“Nameless King, the meeting is to start soon. Please make your way towards the meeting room now.”

He quickly placed Ichika back in Touka’s arms and grabbed his mask and tied it on his face, ready to walk out the door when Ichika started crying yet again, calling for her father.

”I know,” Ken murmured softly, turning back to caress his daughter’s cheek. “But, I have duties to attend to. I’ll be back soon.”

Touka had remained largely silent and still as he turned to leave. His heart ached slightly, remembering how she would send him off to his meetings with a small smile and wave.

The throbbing in his heart grew as he heard Ichika crying again. 

Only a few hours. Just a few hours for her to wait.

* * *

Matsuri was never an easy man to deal with, Ken knew that. However, the man’s attitude today was causing Ken to have a strong desire to leap over the table and strangle him.

The Washuu—Matsuri in particular—were never fond of ‘half-breeds’ or ‘illegitimate children’, be it their own spawn or others.

It was easy for Matsuri to figure out that Ichika was a ‘half-bred’ child. Ken hadn’t taken a wife, yet he was now father to a baby. One that could be distantly heard crying.

Normally, Ken was unaffected by what people thought of him or his family, but Matsuri had taken it to a whole other level.

Constant mutters and curses towards Ichika came from his cracked lips. Disgusted glares fired at Ken like he had just danced on Tsuneyoshi’s grave. Obvious jabs when he spoke of his own relatives being purebred.

”Blasted child,” Ken heard him mutter.

His gloved fingers clenched the edge of the table. He couldn’t afford to lose his composure now. He just needed to go through with this, then he would be free from this vile excuse of a man for a while.

“Matsuri,” Amon interjected. “Would you please be quieter in regards to your muttering? It’s annoying all of us here.”

Said man grimaced, then looked away.

Though he was silent, the glares had continued. Sometimes his dark, cold eyes would be looking in Ken’s direction. Sometimes, towards the direction of the now softening cries.

Time passed, and Ken was no longer listening to the conversation taking place in the meeting. He was thinking about all the ways he could inflict harm on or kill Matsuri without anybody knowing that it was him.

Just when he was ready to leap across the table and slice Matsuri’s head off with his sword, Amon had stood up.

”Meeting adjourned.” He simply said.

Ken had moved out of the meeting room quickly and back to his own, eager to get away from Matsuri and get back to Touka and Ichika.

Ichika was already asleep when he got back into the room, and Touka was gently rocking the cot back and forth. Her eyes were fixed on the sleeping baby, and didn’t avert when he had entered the room.

He approached the cot, raising his eyebrows when he saw the redness around Ichika’s eyes.

”She wouldn’t stop crying,” Touka said. “I think she missed you.”

”Perhaps,” He agreed, settling himself next to Touka, noticing sadly when she flinched slightly.

The silence between the two of them was an awkward one, filled with tension. Neither of the both of them were looking at each other. Touka was focusing on the baby in the room, and Ken was struggling to think of a conversation topic.

”...dinner will be starting soon,” Ken finally spoke. “I’d like for you to join me.”

Touka was quick to shake her head and give her response. “N-No... I’m not hungry.”

To Ken, it was an obvious lie. He knew that better than anyone, but he wouldn’t push her. He wouldn’t do anything to strain their relationship further.

”...I’ll ask for a servant to bring you something if you feel hungry.” He said softly. “Just call for one of them and they’ll bring you your meal.”

Somehow, it felt as if he were taking her hostage. Having someone bring her food and her being somewhat fearful of him.

He watched as she let out a long and deep sigh, her eyes still looking at the sleeping child in the room.

”I’ll take Ichika if you want,” He offered. “In case she starts crying again. I might be able to calm her down.”

Touka didn’t feel comfortable about that. Leaving Ichika with Ken was a strange but beneficial thing for her, and she desperately needed rest from caring for the baby. However, her child would be in a room with kings, some may be staring at the infant with disdain. And she just didn’t sit well with that idea.

Her body and mind had two different wants though, and her body was the one to make that decision, for her tired mind just couldn’t muster up much energy anymore.

”Alright...”

* * *

Dinner was tricky for Ken. One arm was holding Ichika and the other was trying to stab a piece of pork on his plate.

And there were the glares. Again.

This time, Ken couldn’t be bothered to even glare back at Matsuri. He was too busy with trying to remove his thumb out of Ichika’s mouth and attempting to cut the bits of food into smaller pieces.

From the corner of his eye, he could see Yoshimura waving at Ichika, which she saw and directed her attention to him for a brief moment before continuing to slobber all over Ken’s hand.

Dinner was not over until all the kings and higher ups had finished their meals, so when Ken was finished with his meal, he still had to wait for the others to finish theirs.

Then, he saw Kichimura.

Normally, he would be ignorant when it came to Kichimura. The man was always a strange one, and he would prefer to not interact with him at all.

He had expected Kichimura to be smiling widely and waving at Ichika, but his actual reaction was a complete juxtaposition of it. 

Kichimura’s face had been warped in anger and jealousy as he glared at Ichika. His glare was more intense than Matsuri’s, and Ken didn’t know how that was possible for such a oddly cheery man.

The pit of his stomach now had an intense tugging feeling. It was instinct. It was his instinct that was telling him that something would go horribly wrong at some point in this week. 

With nothing left on his plate to distract him, he just grew more and more disturbed by Kichimura. The odd man’s usual behaviour was just annoying to him, maybe a disturbing one to others, but his new behaviour made his skin crawl.

He had been intimidated many times in his life; his father when he was upset, facing Shuu in mock combat as a child, meeting Touka for the first time, and many more. 

The intimidation he felt from Kichimura was nothing like the ones he had experienced before. The others made him aware of his surroundings, made him keep his guard up and make sure everything was within his line of sight. This made him want to either tear Kichimura into shreds then and there or to curl up in his bed and never get out again.

He couldn’t do anything now, but he made sure to be _extremely_ wary of Kichimura for the next few days, as if his life depended on it.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here’s the blurb:
> 
> He had been so hungry on that night. So, so hungry for human blood and had made a mistake. A horrible, horrible mistake that doomed the both of them. She had been younger on that night, naive and oblivious to the mistake she made that would bond them together... for eternity.


	30. Investigation

When Ken entered his room again, he was pleased to see a clean plate sitting before Touka. 

She was staring out of the window, like how she would always do when she had nothing better to do. 

Ken had made sure to lock the door properly when he had entered. With recent events and the look Kichimura gave to his daughter, he felt rather insecure now. 

He wouldn’t let any harm come to his small family. He would make sure that he would be there to protect them.

Though, now he was dealing with another issue; his relationship with Touka.

She hadn’t even turned to look at him when he had entered the room. Even though he had only found her a few hours ago, he could already see the difference in attitude.

She was quiet, almost as if she was refusing to talk to him. When he had approached her to stroke her hair gently, she had shrunk away from him. 

She was just the opposite of what she used to be around him. He couldn’t tell if it was because of guilt or because she was angry that he came for her.

”...I’m not angry, you know...” she suddenly said, as if she had been reading his mind.

”W-What do you mean?” He questioned hesitantly as he laid Ichika back into her cot.

”This—the whole situation of you bringing me back to... your side. I’m not angry about it.”

”Why not?”

Touka shook her head, and he had a feeling that she was only refusing to look at him because she didn’t want him to see her emotional.

”I’m just not.” She whispered quietly. “I was the first to run away from you, and left you not knowing where I was and worried about me. I don’t have the right to be angry at you when I’ve caused you this much pain.”

Ken was staring at her. He chewed his bottom lip as he tried to think of something, _anything_ , he could say to her.

The tension in the air and his own mixed feelings felt as if they were blocking his airway and prevent his voice from escaping his mouth. He just didn't know what he could say in this situation.

He got her back. It had been his objective for almost a year. But why did it feel like he hadn't achieved anything?

"I'm sorry," He blurted, not knowing what else to say but that.

She snorted humorlessly. "Why would you be sorry? You did nothing wrong in this situation."

"I-I did!" He protested. "I ripped you away from your new--um--family."

Was that even the right word?

Touka just shook her head, and didn’t speak after that.

He didn’t either.

* * *

 

Ken knew that their relationship wouldn’t ever be the same when he got her back. He knew that better than anyone.

However, he didn’t expect the distance between them to be so... vast.

It was as if the two of them were strangers to each other. They were both sleeping on the bed, but both stretched out away from each other as far as possible.

Ken did it to give her space and the rest she needed from taking care of Ichika. But, he didn’t know why Touka did it. 

She could have felt guilty, or she just didn’t want to be near the man who had torn her away from her happy life. He didn’t know, but he was _dying_ to know.

He’d give anything to have their old lives back.

Another sigh was about to escape his cracked lips when his ears perked up.

He could hear a voice.

Slowly, he raised his head from his pillow and shifted his ears, just enough to heighten his sense of hearing even further. 

It was uncommon to hear voices during this late hour, especially from the Washuu quarters.

”...enough... do it myself!”

”B-But... caught by... king...!”

”You... my time... had two years! Half... out!”

Even with his keen sense of hearing, he couldn’t hear everything, but he was able to identify one of the voices.

Kichimura.

His heart dropped, and he could feels his palms getting sweaty. 

What was he doing up at this hour? Who was he speaking to?

From the bits and pieces he picked up from the conversation, he knew that it couldn’t have been good.

The other voice had mentioned ‘king’ and being caught by someone. And Kichimura was angrily speaking that he would do something by himself.

His thoughts were halted before he could think any further and his heart stopped when his ears picked up on noises coming right outside his door.

Two groans, and two things—bodies—being dropped on the floor.

The blood in his veins felt like it had froze over and his heart felt like it had stopped beating. He activated his night vision eyes and felt his eyes widen when he saw the door open, and Kichimura tip toe in.

His eyes darted to the cot lying in the room. From where the cot was, Kichimura was closer to Ichika than he was.

He had two choices; to see what Kichimura was up to and risk his Ichika’s life, or to immediately attack and risk waging war against the Washuus.

There was no time to think anymore—like he even needed to think—when Kichimura drew his sword, his eyes glued to the sleeping baby in the room.

Ken made his move. 

He shot out from the bed and tackled the other man to the floor, pinning him down by the wrists and kicking the sword away.

”GUARDS!” He shouted at the top of his lungs, so loudly that his eyes vibrated and he woke the other two.

It only took a few moments for the guards to enter the room and apprehend Kichimura.

Soon, the few kings and higher ups had approached the room, and Ken hurriedly tied his mask back onto his face before turning to face the other kings.

”It’s the third damn year that something strange happened,” Amon remarked before scanning the room.

Matsuri seemed... unimpressed with the situation. He shot a look towards Kichimura that was more reminiscent of disappointment rather than anger.

But, the disappointment was as if he was upset that Kichimura had failed to kill Ichika, not that he had disappointed the family name.

And that got Ken’s blood boiling. He knew that the Washuu were horrible people, but this was crossing the line for him.

How could they wish death on a child who had done nothing wrong, and had only just came into the world?

Matsuri had dragged Kichimura down the hallway and leaned closer to Kichimura and whispered something, something that Ken was able to hear loud and clear.

”How many times are you going to fail?” He whispered. “The children died against him, and you couldn’t finish him off yourself.”

Those words had hit him. Hard.

Every child he had tortured and killed for information. Every attempt on his life, and possibly others. 

It had all been orchestrated by Matsuri and Kichimura.

His entire being was suddenly consumed by darkness, and he knew what had happened.

He had lost control.

It was to be expected. All the suffering he had felt from assassination attempts were traced back to two people that were right under his nose.

And now, they were targeting him again, along with his family.

When he came to, he was outside, blood stained glass shards all over him and Amon, in lion form, beaten horribly beneath his paw.

He hurriedly stepped back and his heart dropped when he realised how close he was to completely tearing off his friend’s head.

Amon’s body was covered in deep and large scratches and bite marks, blood was oozing out from his wounds and one of his paws were facing the wrong direction.

He felt some wounds on his own body, too, but they felt minor compared to what he saw on Amon.

His eyes darted around and scanned his surroundings. No one else was in sight.

He looked up.

Too many people were looking from the cracked window above him. Some had pressed their faces into the glass to get a better view of what had been happening.

”Amon...?” He called out quietly, coming to terms with what he had done. “Amon!”

He placed his paw on the lion’s head, shaking furiously. “Wake up!”

”...m’fine...” a weak voice croaked.

Ken watched as the lion shifted back into human form. Amon still laid on the ground, covered in blood, but with a pained smile on his face.

Ken let out a sigh of relief, allowing himself to shift back as well.

”I’m sorry,” He said shakily. “I-I just got so...”

He remembered the reason why he had lost control in the first place.

”...angry.” He mumbled. “Where’s Matsuri?”

”W-What?” Amon groaned.

”Where is he?” Ken demanded. “I-I have to find him...!”

Amon stood up shakily and placed a large hand on Ken’s shoulder while wincing from the pain of his broken arm.

”Calm down,” He said seriously. “You’re wounded and you just came out from a rage. You need rest.”

”No!” Ken protested. “I have to find him now! Finishing him is the only way to—!”

He paused, realised something, then assessed the situation completely.

Even if he did accuse Matsuri of being the one who orchestrated everything, if no one else had heard him, what good would it do? It would just make him a fool and he would have to face war.

And as horrible as Matsuri was, he was a very persuasive man and could bring other kingdoms on his side should he decide to wage war against him.

He had it all thought out.

* * *

After assisting Amon to the royal doctor, Ken had slowly walked to his room, avoiding every gaze that was directed at him.

Touka was in a room, and judging by the small little splatter of blood on her clothes, she had been there to witness him fall out of the window.

"What happened?" She asked gently. "You don't do that unless you taste blood, right?"

Ken opened his mouth to explain, then remembered that Touka had an even better sense of hearing than he did.

"Did you hear him?" He asked. "Did you hear what Matsuri said?"

Touka's eyes slowly moved to the right as she thought about it.

"Something around the lines of 'you couldn't finish him off'?" 

Ken blinked, then smiled widely behind his mask. "T-Then... you heard him!"

Touka shook her head. "Even if I did, what good would it do? If you accuse him and use me as witness, nobody would believe you or me." 

He closed his mouth. It was entirely possible that, despite many of the king’s being very kind men, they would be led to believe that he had told her to speak of a lie.

But, he was also certain that some of the kings had their doubts on Matsuri. 

He would ask them soon, and he would hear what they had to say.

So, after he had scrubbed the blood off his body, he headed towards Yoshimura’s room.

The old man was always kind, and could frequently see through lies and bring out the truth, but usually chose to remain silent.

Two knocks on his door and he was given entry into the room.

”My boy,” The old man called out from his bed. “What is it?”

Ken smiled softly at the little nickname. He had been calling him that ever since his parents had perished in that fire. Even at the age of twenty three, he was still being called a boy.

”Yoshimura,” He said quietly. “If I may ask you this question, do you promise to give me your absolute and honest opinion?”

”Of course, my boy.”

He took a deep breath. “Do you think Matsuri is the one commanding all those children? The ones that have caused us suffering for so long.”

Yoshimura’s eyes opened slightly, and this was how Ken knew that he had grown serious.

”...my boy, what makes you say that?”

”I-I heard him, sir.” He replied.

The older man folded his arms and looked at Ken. He stared for a long time, which made him feel as if Yoshimura was seeing through his leather mask.

Eventually, he sighed heavily. “I do believe that Matsuri, and his blasted half brother, Kichimura, are the leaders of those children. It was a gut feeling for me, when I first began to suspect them.”

”Then... why did you not say anything about it?”

Yoshimura shook his head and stared in the opposite direction. “I am old, and I am not fit to defend my kingdom. One wrong word from me that could insult Matsuri and I could be facing a war.”

He sighed again. “My people were—still are—malnourished. Two years wasn’t much for them to gain much strength. If Matsuri launches an attack on my kingdom now, we would be erased from the face of this land.”

”And, do you believe that they should be eradicated? For all the harm and suffering they’ve brought on us and our people?” Ken asked.

Yoshimura looked towards him again, eyes parted once more. “Child, I’ve always thought that there was never any good nor bad, only the point of view of others. However, murdering for no reason is a horrible thing to do. I fear that they will corrupt their future generation with their blasted ideologies and need to eradicate those who stand in their way. I do believe that their bloodline should done away with.”

* * *

Ken found himself going to Shachi next. He didn’t want to disturb Amon from his rest, after inflicting all of those grievous injuries on him.

”Enter,” came Shachi’s powerful voice.

The bearded man’s eyebrows rose when he had entered the room. He set down the small book he had been reading and folded his arms.

”I’d expected you would be recovering from your injuries,” Shachi said. “You did suffer numerous cuts and scratches from your earlier fight.”

”This is nothing.” Ken replied. “I’ve survived more fatal wounds before.”

Shachi nodded. He stood up and moved to the little table in his room, then sat on the chairs provided. “Take a seat.”

Ken did so.

”We haven’t known each other for long,” Shachi said. “However, I’m guessing you have something to discuss with me, no?”

Ken nodded his head and placed his hands on his knees. “It’s about Matsuri and Kichimura.”

Shachi held up a hand. “You’re wondering  if they’ve been the ones who have been sending children to assassinate our men and people?”

Again, Ken nodded. Shachi was a keen one.

He folded his arms, stared at the ceiling and sighed. “As with Matsuri, I haven’t known him for long, so I cannot give my exact opinion on the matter. Though, I will say that he seems to be dangerous.”

For a moment, Shachi shut his eyes, then opened them with a wide look and stared at Ken. 

“What is it?”

”My predecessor.” Shachi said. “He was executed for assassinating the previous Washuu King, yes?”

”That’s right.”

”...was the reason why he was proven guilty due to something related to time?”

Ken thought about it. “I believe that’s what happened.”

Shachi’s face brightened. “My predecessor was a horrible person, and not a man of his word. However, he would never lie about time. It was too precious to him.”

Ken rubbed his minor scratches as he took in what Shachi had said. When he finally realised what had happened on that day a year ago, he stared at Shachi.

”He was framed.”

The other man nodded, a solemn expression on his bearded face.

”I know many of you wished death on my predecessor,” Shachi said. “But I also know that many of you—pardon my rude words—did not have the guts to make an attempt on his life.”

”But... why him?” Ken questioned both himself and Shachi. “Yamori was ignorant of most things and kept to himself. Why was he the one that was framed? It could have been any of the other three kings.”

Shachi’s lips quirked up ever so slightly. “Amon is the representation of justice itself, nobody would ever expect him to murder someone in cold blood. Yoshimura is an old dodder with a kind heart, no one would believe that he murdered someone, even if he is capable of doing so. And then, there’s you,” He said. “You hold grudges against others, but never actually exact revenge on them. You disliked the Washuu, but wouldn’t raise your hand against them. My predecessor, a violent man with a horrible attitude, was the perfect person to frame.”

Ken smiled gently behind his mask. All the reasons hit right on the mark.

”But why kill Tsuneyoshi?” He questioned again. “Matsuri and Kichimura held enough power and secrecy on their hands to do whatever they pleased, why did they have to kill the old man?”

Shachi frowned, then looked away, then looked back at him.

”The king holds the most power, and hardly anyone objects to him.”

”...the ability to control everybody.” Ken murmured. “He wanted power.”

”A king is usually the least suspected person to conduct something of this extent,” He continued. “Many believe what he does is for the best of the kingdom. That should be the reason why he had his own father murdered.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Potential bad news for you guys: I’m about to receive the results of my national exams in a few weeks time, and there’s a chance that I could fail them (fuck you, math) and have to repeat the year. 
> 
> My final year of secondary was the reason why I hardly wrote any new chapters for my fanfics, and if I have to repeat that, then Following Your Scent will have to be placed on an almost full year hiatus, and Nonexistent Heartbeat would have to come during 2020.
> 
> I’m praying that I can pass my nationals and write what I want to, rather than repeat that hell of a year. It’s really only math that’s worrying me, because if I can’t pass it then I can’t move onto college.
> 
> So, hope that I pass my nationals so I can write more :D


	31. Plans of War

On the next day, Ken went to visit Amon, both to check on his injuries and to question him about Matsuri and Kichimura.

”And I was wondering when you’d visit,” Amon said seriously.

”My apologies,” Ken said sincerely. “I didn’t want to bother you while you were resting.”

Amon’s eyebrows rose. “What brings you here though? I assume it’s not entirely to check up on my injuries.”

Another keen king.

Before Ken could speak another word, Amon spoke up.

”It’s about Matsuri, isn’t it?” He said, surprising Ken. “I heard him yesterday. I understood why you were so angry.”

”Then why did you remain silent?” Ken demanded. “You should have allowed—or joined—me to rip them into shreds. They’ve killed our people, and deserve death.”

”Peace, friend. As much as I would love to just maim them with my own claws, it’s not possible in our current state.” He said. “Remember, they have an army of children trained to kill. If word gets out that their leader had been slaughtered by one of us, they could all come for us until our kingdoms become ruins.”

”And?” Ken demanded. “What do you expect us to do?”

Amon remained silent and stared at his feet for a few moments before replying.

”War.”

Ken’s face dropped behind his mask. Amon was usually the type to avoid any sort of conflict between the kingdoms. For him to suggest war was completely out of character.

”Y-You can’t be serious.” He stammered. “I-If something goes wrong, we’re looking at tens of thousands of casualties.”

”I’m well aware of that, my friend.” Amon said quietly. “But, it’s the best choice that we have. Think about it; the Washuu’s army has been decreasing for a while now, likely to make everything seem more believable. If they don’t have enough men to combat, they’ll send the children.”

”In other words,” Ken cut in. “You want us to kill two birds with a single stone.”

”Yes. To eliminate the Washuu and the children. It can all be done if we wage war on them.”

”We’d be losing countless citizens though,” Ken urged. “Those children are sneaky enough to enter our kingdoms and castles. So many of us will be slaughtered without good reason.”

”What other choice to you propose?” Amon challenged, as if daring him to propose something else. “We can put an end to this wretched bloodline and those children if we do this. It’s a better option than letting us fight for the rest of our lives, knowing who is the one out to murder us.”

No response came. Ken was wracking his mind for another argument, but nothing came to mind. In his heart, he had already known that this would have been the best option. 

Maybe, he just wanted to feel better about himself. 

“Fine. We discuss this with Shachi and Yoshimura when we can.”

* * *

The thought of war raged on in his head as he traveled back to his room.

War.

It would mean blood, injuries, and countless deaths.

He pondered how he would keep Touka and Ichika safe when it happened.

They would be Matsuri’s first targets when the war begins. Ken was the only king with both a child and lover that he cared deeply for. Killing the both of them would likely sink him into an endless pool of depression.

He could keep them in a room with guards standing outside and archers near the windows. But, the Oggai has snuck in once, and it meant that they could do so again.

He had been so absorbed in his thoughts that he had not been aware of his surroundings and had collided with his room’s door.

Cursing and rubbing his head, he entered his room. Again, he found Touka staring out of the window, this time cradling Ichika in her arms, who was sleepily looking around.

”Touka,” he called, needing her to know exactly what was going on to make sure she was prepared for it. “Listen to me.”

She turned slightly, looking at him.

For a brief moment, he had forgotten what he had wanted to say. He just wanted to forget about everything and just spend time with them.

But, the war was a more important matter for now.

He lowered his voice. “The kings will be waging war on Matsuri.”

Her eyebrows raised and her mouth parted slightly.

”Amon and I have already decided, and the other kings seem to share the same mindset.” he continued. “I’ll be discussing  the details with the other two, and one of us will launch an attack soon after we get home.”

Ken didn’t fail to notice the way her eyes dimmed when he said the word ‘home’.

He sat next to her and breathed heavily. “Touka. You can talk to me. About anything. I know that something about me is bothering you, I can see it.”

He didn’t look at her, but he could tell that she was looking down, eyes glued to her feet, a dim expression on her face.

”I...” she started, causing Ken to look up. “I’m just conflicted.”

”About?”

”Our...our social standings. You are a king, and I’m just a normal person. What would society think of us? Kings are not meant to bear children with common people. I know it’s something that is often looked down upon.”

Ken absorbed the information.

”That’s it?”

She turned to face him, wide-eyed. “Why do you mean ‘that’s it’? This is something extremely sensitive.”

”Touka, is that the reason why you left?” he said, ignoring her previous question. “Because you were afraid of what society would think of our relationship? Of our daughter?”

He watched her chew her lips, fists tightening around the bedsheets. Eventually, she gave a small nod.

”Pathetic, isn’t it?” she said bitterly. 

Ken shook his head and smiled softly behind his mask. “Akira was a common person. Amon wouldn’t marry another person unless it was her.”

She was looking at him with a questioning gaze, as if she was trying to deduce if what he was saying was false or true.

“Touka...” he whispered. “I understand how Amon feels. I truly do.”

He stood up abruptly. “I’ll leave you alone. I have to discuss matters with the other kings.”

* * *

Quietly, Ken had gotten Yoshimura and Shachi to Amon’s room. Before closing the door, he had made sure that there were guards standing outside of the door and that nobody else had seen them.

“You do know that this is risky,” Amon warned. “Who knows if those dreaded children are monitoring our every movement and reporting it to Matsuri or Kichimura.”

”This is most convenient now,” Yoshimura said. “If we were to plan for a war after we return to our respective kingdoms, it could take months to plan, with all the sent letters and stealth movements to ensure we won’t be spotted.”

”I suggest an all-out surprise attack. They wouldn’t have time to gather their soldiers and those children if we decimated them before they could react.” Shachi suggested.

Amon shook his head. “That is a stupid idea. Remember, the children could be monitoring us now, and Matsuri will have plenty of time to prepare for the war.”

”Assassins?” Ken suggested.

”Again, a stupid idea,” Amon said. “The army here has decreased in numbers, but they are still extremely skilled in the art of killing. An assassin that made one mistake would be an easy way to heaven.”

“And Matsuri could identify where the assassin came from, then launch an attack on one of us.” Yoshimura said.

Ken sighed in frustration. "Then what do you suggest we do? We have the numbers to outrank his entire army, but our men aren't trained to fight off stealthy and nimble assassins."

Shachi cleared his throat. “I don’t think we have another choice. To combine our manpower and force our way through seems to be the best option for now.”

For almost an hour, they discussed plans on which date and what formation their men would take during the attack. Some yelling ensued and one of them had hurled a chair across the room in frustration.

Eventually they came to a conclusion that they would begin their attacks a week after they went home.

Or so they thought.

Shachi was the first to exit the room and had bumped right into Kichimura, who had his head pressed against the door.

”Bloody hell,” Ken muttered. Kichimura had been listening in on their conversation.

Why didn’t any of them take notice?

There was no time to think anymore. Kichimura was already sprinting down the hallway, likely intent on reporting the matter to Matsuri.

How long had Kichimura been listening to their conversation? Had he been listening for so long that he already told Matsuri?

Currently, they were safe, even if Kichimura had reported this to Matsuri. Matsuri’s army wasn’t here and his higher ups wouldn’t be great enough in numbers to combat Amon’s army.

Though, this didn’t mean that they would be entirely safe. God knows if he would launch an attack during the night.

Now, they had to be cautious around Matsuri; keeping their distance from him and making sure he had no weapons on him whatsoever, otherwise he could run his sword through them or even gut them with a small knife.

Heck, Ken would even be willing to skip dinner if it meant that he wouldn't have to face Matsuri.

Now, he was cautiously slinking back into his room. He was on high alert, double checking to make sure that there was nobody hiding behind a corner and waiting for him to show up so they could kill him.

He was almost to his room, and then he picked up the scent of blood.

His mind that had been on high alert had flipped to overdrive as he dashed towards his room, where the scent of blood was originating from.

He prayed that Touka and Ichika weren’t dead, and were injured slightly, or at least still alive.

When he had slammed the door open, he first scanned the surroundings; blood, blood everywhere, staining the walls with red.

His wide eyes were now staring at the scene before him.

Ichika wasn’t crying. Touka was standing over a body, a sword in hand, blood covering her body.

”Touka...?” He called out hesitantly.

The sword fell from her small hand, and she slumped onto her knees, prompting Ken to hurriedly dash to her side.

”What happened?” He demanded, checking her body for any injury. He found none on skin that was visible to him.

He received no response other that her wide eyes staring at the body in horror.

”...I-I killed him...”

That was obvious enough. But he needed to know what had happened.

But not before calming her down.

He thought about calling a servant for some water, but realised how disastrous that would be, as the metallic and putrid scent of blood was obvious and if they were to see the mess, they would likely scream in terror, alerting anyone nearby.

But, Juuzou wasn’t afraid of blood. In fact, he was usually never disturbed by a body.

So, he called him. And in the meantime, he settled on rubbing Touka’s back. Trying to comfort her while giving her space as well.

It took only a few moments for the stitched man to show up, a blank yet happy expression on his face.

”Juuzou,” Ken began. “I want you to remove this body and identify who it is. Make sure no one else sees the body, and report this to Amon.”

Juuzou nodded and headed off to bring more men to assist him.

”And bring a goblet of water.” He added.

When the water had arrived, he had made Touka consume small sips of the cooling liquid, then continued to rub her back until she was ready to speak clearly.

”H-He just came in without knocking,” She explained slowly, a quiver to her voice. “He had his sword out and was heading f-for Ichika.” Her voice choked slightly. “I don’t remember much. I was struggling against him, then somehow I got his sword, and then...”

Ken’s lips pulled into a thin line as he thought of the heavy wounds made from the sword in the man’s body. He was sure that he had seen a portion of the man’s rib cage.

”Motherly instinct, maybe?” He suggested, partly as a joke and partly being serious.

She shook her head, eyes looking away from the red on the wall.

”It’s okay,” He said softly, rubbing her back. “You didn’t do anything wrong. It was an act of self defence.”

He glanced back to where the body had been. The blood was already starting to dry, bleeding it’s darkness into the walls and the carpets, and stinking the whole area up with the scent of blood.

The maids and butlers were attempting to scrub out the blood, but it did close to nothing but lighten the colour and remove the odour. 

The bloodstain would likely be there forever, unless Amon decided to have that bit destroyed and rebuilt. It would serve as a reminder to Touka that she had murdered someone in this room.

After the servants had exited the room, Ken had spoken privately to Juuzou in regards to the body.

”It wasn’t a child,” the man had reported. “However, it wasn’t someone who was in the castle either. I had even counted the Washuu that had arrived here, and none of them were missing.”

Ken knew that it _had_ to be the work of Matsuri. What other person in the castle would order someone to attempt the lives of Touka and Ichika?

* * *

For three days, it was peaceful. No sudden attacks, nobody coming to disturb Ken’s time with his family, no Kichimura and none of Matsuri staring.

And this was the worst bit.

For those three days, Ken had been expecting hateful glares, more attacks during the days and nights, and Kichimura spying on them. 

But nothing of the sort occured.

He was getting more and more paranoid by the day. Everyday, he would anticipate something horrible would happen and it never did. Everyday, everything failed to meet his expectations.

And just when he was finally ready to let go of everything and convince himself that he was overreacting, he woke up to the smell of smoke.

Finally, his expectations had been met. And in the worst way possible.

Fire was no problem to him, and was an old companion of his during the cold days of winter. Smoke was his arch enemy.

He still had the horrors of reliving the memory of when the castle had burnt down when he was a boy. The smoke had choked him and caused his vision to fog with tears as he struggled to navigate his way through the burning castle all the while trying to find his parents.

He still remembered the scent of smoke that had lingered on him for hours even after he had ran through the snow. It served as a painful memory that his parents had perished within the fire.

And now, he was struggling to control his breathing, unaware of his surroundings. His vision was rapidly turning gray as smoke poured in.

It took the cries of his child to realise that their lives were in danger.

He had failed to notice that Touka had been knocked unconscious from inhaling the smoke. Her nose was too sensitive for this.

Hurriedly, he had thrown Touka over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and scooped Ichika up with his other hand.

The smoke was coming in through the door, and he knew that there was a fire outside his room, from the increasing temperature and sweat pouring down his face. 

He couldn’t leap through the flames without risk of injuring the other two. Their combined weights would be too heavy for him to make a leap across the flames.

His eyes were now fixated on the glass window.

If he jumped through that window now, he could risk Touka and Ichika being cut by the glass shards. And from such a height, he wouldn’t be able to save all three of them without falling to his death.

He would have to change forms while in mid-air.

But how would he do that? He couldn’t hold onto the both of them when his paws could no longer stretch to the back of his head. He couldn’t even grasp them with his own paws.

He was at a loss. And time was running out. It was either being burnt again and having the other two bear the same marks as he, or receive wounds so deep they scar for life.

His mind had gone blank when a piece of burning debris had fallen and blocked the doorway.

He no longer knew what else to do. He had to save the both of them or else they would suffer a slow and painful death together. His child would never have gotten a better chance at life, and his reunion with Touka would have been for nothing.

In his reflection, he had seen the fake teeth on his mask. 

It was a risk he was willing to take.

He quickly set both Touka and Ichika down and assumed his wolf form. 

He was running out of time. He knew that as he bent down to, as gently as possible, take both Touka and Ichika into his mouth. 

When he was certain that both of them were secure in his mouth and that he wouldn’t accidentally swallow them, he charged towards the window and crashed through it.

He endured the pain that he felt when the glass cut into his skin, and he tried to not concentrate on the fact that he was currently diving out of a window at least twenty metres high.

Pain rattled through his bones when he landed. He had endured through and only let Touka and Ichika out when he was certain the coast was clear of any enemies.

They were covered in his spit but that was the least of his worries at this point. He needed to find if anybody else had ran out of the castle like he did.

He had hoisted Touka onto his shoulder again and cradled Ichika as he went off to search for the others.

In a short moment, he had found the others; his higher ups, the other kings and everyone else that was within the castle.

And he had also found them struggling to fend off an army.

Matsuri’s army. The emblem painted on their armor was more than evidence.

Some of the castle residents had burn marks visible on their skin. Some were still coughing from the smoke they had inhaled. And some of them had been knocked out from inhaling too much smoke.

Those who were still standing were injured, either through burn marks or glass cuts. They were struggling to hold up their swords and shields properly.

Even the kings were struggling to put up a good fight. Amon still had a broken limb, Yoshimura was too old, and left Shachi to fight on his own.

Shachi’s body (a rhino) had been cut up in different parts, and he was even missing an eye.

Still, he rammed himself towards the enemies, knocking back multiple of them and trampling them at the cost of even deeper wounds that were as deep as the tip of a sword to the hilt.

Ken knew he had to join in the battle. But he couldn’t leave Touka and Ichika out in the open, especially when Ichika was still wailing loudly.

He settled with placing them with Yoshimura. Though the old man was in his older years, he could still put up a good fight with a sword. A shame that he couldn’t do so in his animal form.

One more time, Ken had shifted and was ready to fight. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yall i actually found the original copy of FYS and i threw up while reading that.


	32. Failing Efforts

Ken had faced three men in combat before and had gotten rather scratched up from the battle.

The three men had attacked him with claws, teeth and talons. And he had barely managed the battle without losing control of himself.

And now, he was up against an entire army. 

They had no claws, teeth, or talons. But they did have armor, which his teeth couldn’t pierce through very well. They had swords, which sliced through his fur and flesh. They had shields that cushioned attacks from him.

His efforts against them were futile. Every time he charged towards them, more of them would stab him at his back. Every time he attempted to bite down on them, he would be stabbed again, and his teeth would end up hurting.

He knew that the battle wouldn’t be won without him going berserk. But he couldn’t risk doing so without harming the others.

He had already injured Amon, and they were horrible injuries. He didn’t know what he could in this state.

He only needed to bide time until Amon’s army arrived, but how long would he have to fight for?

So, he tried his best. Repeating the same cycle of throwing himself at the enemies, knocking them over with his paws and attempted to crush their skulls with his teeth, with little avail.

Even his own higher ups were having trouble against them. The number of enemies were just too much for them to handle. 

When Amon’s army had arrived, he had ordered for the kings to leave the kingdom and return to their own.

As much as he didn’t want to, he knew that he had to. He couldn’t risk his own life and leave his kingdom with no ruler, and he certainly couldn’t risk his higher ups’ lives either.

While Amon’s army had held off the enemies, he, and his higher ups, had leapt onto horses and made a beeline out of the kingdom.

He had seen Kichimura for a brief moment when he had ran to take Touka and Ichika with him. The smile he gave him was bone chilling, and he couldn’t help but think that something would be horribly wrong in his kingdom.

His horse's up and down moments caused him to feel sharp pains on his lower body, where he had been stabbed. He ignored it, trying to concentrate on returning to his kingdom and bringing his army to fend off Matsuri's army.

Halfway through the ride, Touka had woken up, and he had provided her with a brief explanation, then told her to stay at the castle, where it was safe, until he returned.

Well, he was planning to let her remain in the castle, but then he realised how horrible of a mistake that would be.

His kingdom was in utter and complete chaos. Fire was raging everywhere, his people were running around screaming, and the putrid scent of burnt flesh penetrated the air.

He almost threw up on the spot at the sight of everything. The horrible smell, the painful flashbacks of when the castle had first burnt down.

Suddenly, he was a little boy again. Facing the fires of the castle and watching as his mother was crushed by a burning piece of wood and being told by his father to run. To abandon the both of them so that he himself could live on.

And, he was running. Running on his tiny little paws while crying from the burns on his face and the recent loss of his parents.

In reality, he had reached up to touch his face. It felt as if the skin there had been burnt again. He could feel the pain of his skin being charred, the blisters that had formed, and--.

"Ken!"

Touka's voice had jolted him from his memories. The pain was no longer there. Though he was still shaken up from the entire kingdom being burnt.

"W-We have to save them," He urged, climbing off of his horse and stumbling towards his burning kingdom. 

Then, he felt his body grow heavy with more weight and his footsteps stop.

Shuu was holding him back.

"My King," He said sadly. "The children are here."

Ken knew exactly what Shuu was talking about.

When he took a closer look into the burning hell that was his kingdom, he could see little dots flying around. Every time those dots had paused, a column of red would erupt and he would hear a small 'thud' over the screams.

His people were being slaughtered. 

It was safe to assume that his army had also been mercilessly murdered by those children in black.

Rage was consuming him yet again. Matsuri had it planned the moment they had tried discussing how to destroy them.

He could feel his fangs form and fur grow around his body. His vision was beginning to dim, and he could only feel the urge to _kill_.

”My King!”

Once more, he had been snapped out from his subconscious.

It was Hide who had called him this time. “Some of us are trying to save the villagers. Please, do not risk your life for this. We exist for this reason; to protect you and fulfil your needs. Leave us to do this.”

Ken couldn’t speak. How could he just leave them like this? In an environment that was as hot as hell and they could be ambushed and killed at any moment?

He couldn’t even move his body as he saw his higher ups dive into the fiery hell. 

In a few moments, some of them had came out with a few villagers over their shoulders. The villagers had burns visible on their bodies, torn clothes, and wounds that were bleeding.

”Go!” Shuu screamed. “You must destroy the Washuu! Leave this to us, and go eradicate that cursed bloodline!”

Ken had mounted his horse, and he was at a road that split into three directions.

He wanted to stay and help his higher ups, but he knew that they would be too stubborn to allow him to help.

Then, it came to deciding where to go.

He could raid Kingdom Washuu, but he wouldn’t be able to do anything if the army was there, waiting for him. He would also be endangering Touka and Ichika.

Then, what would he find if he traveled back to Kingdom CCG?

Would he find Matsuri’s army marching towards the other kingdoms, or would he find his comrades and friends lying in a blood of their own blood?

Part of him wanted to end everything on his own by destroying their base of operations, then return to Kingdom CCG to fight the battle.

But, what could he, a lone man, do on his own? He had the strength to crush boulders in his wolf form, but even he would run out of stamina. And even if he didn’t, what good would one man be against an army?

He needed to hurry. 

Abandoning his horse, Ken assumed his other form and allowed Touka to climb on, Ichika in her arms.

He never wanted the journey to be so rough for the both of them, but he had to do so. If he was too late, they would all be massacred and wiped from history.

* * *

The situation in Kingdom CCG was far worse than what he had expected.

He had only been gone for about a day. And the damage done looked as if it had been the remnants of a year long war.

The castle had been dyed red at the base, and countless bodies littered the floor, drowning in a sea of blood.

The bodies were of both Kingdom Washuu and Kingdom CCG’s armies.

The villager houses had not been spared either. Every single one of them was coloured in that dreaded colour.

Children, the men, and the elderly had been maimed or left injured. And the women were naked.

He didn’t need to know what had happened.

Carefully, he trudged over to the castle, praying that the others were still alive whilst ignoring the pleading stares that were being directed to him.

Some parts of the village itself had been charred, a painful reminder of what had been done to his own kingdom.

He let his nose run through the air. He couldn’t detect the presence of a single Washuu. 

But, that didn’t mean that he could run wildly to the castle. After all, they could have just masked their scents.

His eyes darted to every corner he could see with every step, and he made sure to constantly track the air for any unfamiliar or dangerous scents.

His paws were now drenched in blood, but he paid it no heed as he continued his trek towards the castle. He knew that Amon had a secret and special room for times such as this, and he needed to find it.

It felt like hours had passed when he finally made it to the castle entrance. He still didn’t let Touka off of his back, in fear that she would be the first target if she set foot off of him.

When navigation through the castle in his wolf form was no longer available to him, he had made sure that Touka was behind him at all times.

Slowly, he had made his way towards Amon’s office, making sure to check that he had not been followed.

Multiple scents were fresh in this room. Amon, Akira, Juuzou, the list goes on.

And it all traced towards the lone bookshelf in the room; the entrance to the secret room.

He pushed the shelf ever so slightly, creating a gap that was just wide enough for them to squeeze through individually.

There was a small ledge behind the bookshelf, barely large enough for him to keep his toes on it. When the three of them had stepped onto the small ledge, he pushed the shelf back to where it was from the inside.

Everything was dark, but his eyes allowed him to see what was ahead of them; nothing.

Then, he looked down. 

There was only a hole leading downwards, and so deep that he couldn’t even see the bottom clearly. But, if this was the only way down, then Amon was sure to have placed some cushioning at the bottom, otherwise they would end up dying on impact.

”Wait here,” He told Touka.

The tunnel beneath him was wide enough for him to place both hands on either side and still be able to fold his arms. As an extra precaution, he had allowed his claws to manifest, to allow him to pierce the hardened dirt that was the walls of this hole.

Slowly—very slowly—he descended. Bit by bit, he moved downwards. It felt like an eternity had passed before he could see the bottom closely. 

Sure enough, it had been cushioned, and he allowed himself to fall onto the cushions.

”Touka!” He called. “Come down!”

It took him a moment to hear her response.

”I can’t!”

”Why not?”

Then it hit him. She would be able to jump down fine on her own, but she was carrying a baby, too. Jumping down would risk Ichika’s life if Touka wasn’t careful enough. 

And that was how he made the painstaking journey back up to take Ichika in one hand, then descend down again. He was certain his claws were on the verge of snapping off his hand when he had reached the bottom again.

Touka had jumped down after him, landing comfortably—not really—on the cushions below.

Ken had been so preoccupied with going up and down and checking that Touka was safe that he hadn’t noticed the room after the dark tunnel.

It was a long hallway, lit dimly by small torches. There was hardly any ventilation, so it was becoming warmer and warmer for the three of them.

”Amon!” Ken called. He received no response.

He knew that Amon had a secret room, but he didn’t expect it to be this vast in size. 

The size of the hallway didn’t make him feel safe at all. He was afraid that someone could just jump out from behind a corner at the end of the hallway and stab him in the chest.

Ken had unsheathed his sword and used on hand to anchor Touka to him. They took small and slow steps, despite the fancy that there was no hiding spot visible in the long stretch of a tunnel.

At the end of the tunnel was a large, black door, adorned with sword and shield engravings.

It looked as if it been locked tightly, possible even sealed from the inside with clay.

It _looked_ , though.

He pushed the door open, thinking Amon had not decided to install a lock due to the slim to none chance of someone discovering this place by accident.

And immediately, something long and thin was being shy towards his face. He barely had enough time to dodge and only did so by cranking his entire body backwards and falling on his bottom.

Quickly, he pointed his sword towards the now open door, challenging whoever was behind it.

”You smell like him,” a familiar voice snarled. “Are you the Nameless King?”

”...yes.” Ken whispered, standing up to better see who was the talk figure standing before him.

It was Amon.

One of Amon’s eyes were closed, and the other seemed a little foggy. His broken arm was still tied in a sling around his shoulder, and he had his arm and head swaddled in bandages.

”Wha...what happened when I was gone?” Ken asked quietly, looking at Amon in the eyes.

Amon tilted his head upward. “Was there anyone that followed you?”

”No. I made sure nobody followed me. My woman and child are here with me, however.”

Amon nodded. “Come with me.”

It was yet another dark hallway that stretched on for seemingly miles.

”Many of us are wounded,” Amon said. “Some of us died. The survivors are here, though some of them are dying from their wounds.”

”The other kings?” Ken inquired.

”Matsuri fled after seeing his army numbers plummet. He fled, but not before blinding me in one eye and damaging another. I can hardly even see now.”

Ken grimaced. “Will it heal?”

”The castle doctor told me that it will heal with time, but for the time being, all I can see are blurred shapes and distorted colours.”

Amon rubbed at his blinded eye. “Is your family alright?”

Ken turned to face them, staring at the woman he loves and his child.

”They’re fine.”

The came across another dark door.

”The survivors are in here. The secret room was designed to specially lead towards Cornucopia.”

Ken could feel Touka stiffen against him. There was no doubt that she thought about her friends, and whether or not they had survived, despite being a ways away from Cornucopia.

”What is our plan now?” He asked.

Amon shook his head sadly. “We don’t have one yet. Our men are injured and some are dying. The men who can fight are vastly outnumbered by Matsuri’s army.”

”So, you plan to stay underground and wait everything out while our kingdoms are destroyed?” Ken asked, his anger rising. “My kingdom is already up in flames! And there’s a high chance the others’ are, too!”

Amon stopped and turned to stare at Ken. “And? You expect us to enter a battle with wounded men while being outnumbered? We wouldn’t stand a chance against him in our current state! He would eradicate us if we go out now!”

Ken glared. He wanted to erase the Washuu off of the face of the earth as soon as possible, but he knew that Amon’s words were full of truth.

”Then,” Touka began. “What will happened when we come out? The kingdoms will have already been destroyed or burnt to the ground. We have no time left.”

Amon was staring at Touka as if he couldn't believe that she had spoken out. But he said nothing insulting. "We have no other choice. We can only hope to heal underground, and come back for a second time." He said softly.

”And what if there is no ‘second time’?” Touka said, a tone of which was challenging him. “No one else will be there to aid in combat. Everyone else would have died or have joined Matsuri’s ranks to escape an early death.”

”...you have a sharp mind, girl.” Amon remarked. “But, if it comes down to it, we will all perish in the battle. There’s no other choice for us any longer.”

They didn’t speak after that, just quietly traveled to the underground space where the survivors were.

Everything was much worse than what Ken had in mind.

The room stank of blood from the wounds of the soldiers. Everyone was in a panicked state. Some were running around, trying to treat wounds, and most were on the ground, moaning in pain.

”You expect us to fight,” Amon murmured. “when we are like this? Do you think an army like this would stand a chance?”

He had unconsciously shook his head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUYS I PASSED!!! I CAN GO TO COLLEGE!!! NONEXISTENT HEARTBEAT WILL MAKE ITS APPEARANCE THIS YEAR


	33. Maskless

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the late as hell chapter. Writer’s block got to me again :P

In the midst of gaping at the wounded and debating on what course of action they would take, Ken found himself sitting on the cold, hard floor.

From what he had seen, everything seemed hopeless. There seemed no chance that they could win this war anymore. Matsuri has outsmarted them.

”What will we do?” Touka asked quietly, taking a seat next to him. “Will we have to spend our lives underground?”

Ken shook his head. “I won’t allow it. Ichika has to grow up on the surface. I won’t have it that she will have to live a life in the darkness.”

Touka gave a small, sad smile and a sigh. “It’s horrible. To think that this all happened.”

He slowly reached for the baby, cradling her in his arms. “Of course. We always knew Matsuri was a bad apple, but we didn’t know he was this rotten.”

”And then?” She murmured. “What will we do? The army is low on numbers, and yours have been burnt. We don’t even know what happened to the other kings.”

He didn’t know what they would do.

* * *

”Perhaps, it would be better if we remain underground.” Amon suggested.

”...what...?” Ken said slowly, fearing that he had not heard Amon correctly.

”It would be safer. We could go up occasionally to scout the area. Our families would be safer this way.”

Ken squinted his eyes. “Are you serious?”

”What do you think?”

”I have a child, Amon,” Ken said angrily. “I will not allow her to be raised in this dim and gloomy area. And aside from that, are you really giving up that easily?”

Amon glared. “What other choice do we have? I ask you; which would be better? Living in the underground in safety, or having your woman and child skewered through a sword before your very eyes!?”

Ken growled, feeling his anger rise as he thought of another way to fight against Amon.

His thoughts were distracted when his ears picked up on voices not from this room.

His head snapped towards Amon, who was looking in the direction of the door. It seemed that he had also heard the voices.

”Is it them...?” Amon whispered.

The blood and sweat in the room were clogging up Ken’s sense of smell. He couldn’t tell if it was Matsuri or one of the other two kings.

”I’m not sure.” Ken replied. “Draw your sword.”

Slowly and without sound, they had crawled towards the door, brandishing their swords in preparation for what was going to emerge from the door.

”I’ll bet my hat the Nameless King is standing there with his sword.” Ken heard.

Now he was certain that it was Yoshimura behind the door, likely with Shachi. No other man Ken knew would comment ‘I’ll bet my hat’.

He quickly threw open the door, hoping to see the kings with at least some part of their armies with them.

Well, he got what he wished for. Partially.

Yoshimura and Shachi were there, along with a group of soldiers that amounted to fewer than twenty.

Immediately, he could tell something was wrong; some of the soldiers were shorter than the average man.

He questioned if Amon could see that something was off, too.

“It’s relieving to see you unharmed,” Ken said, forcing a smile behind his mask. “We’re trying to finish all of this with what little numbers we still have.”

“Yes, well,” Shachi said, a slight strain to his voice. “We don’t have many either. I don’t believe our remaining forces will amount to much.”

He gestured to the men behind him, then stared at Ken, his eyes wide.

It was more than enough to allow him to confirm that something was definitely wrong.

”Come in,” Amon invited. “Tell us what happened when you arrived back at your respective kingdoms.”

As soon as the other two kings had stepped within the room, Amon had lunged forward, targeting all the soldiers that were shorter in height.

”You think I’m blind?!” He yelled, jamming his sword into the eyes of one of the children. “You think I can’t see? Do you think the Nameless King can’t see?”

Any doubt that Ken had about Amon was quickly thrown to the wind as he, too, charged forward with his sword.

There weren’t many, he had noticed as he pierced one through the head. It was likely that they had been sent as spies, but Matsuri had failed to take their shorter height into account.

As if more blood needed to be in the room, a lake of it laid outside the door now.

”I was too injured to fight back,” Shachi gasped, collapsing to the floor. “They threatened us with death if we did not follow their orders.”

”We intercepted their group halfway to Kingdom CCG,” Yoshimura said, clutching his side. “We were taken hostage as well, and forced to lead them to Amon’s secret room.”

”Or else?” Amon inquired.

“Or else we would watch every single one of our people be beheaded in front of our eyes.” Shachi answered, slumping down onto the floor before sitting with his legs crossed. “We know we made a horrible decision to lead the enemy into our base, but we didn’t want any innocent lives being taken.”

Ken understood. A king’s duty was always to his people first.

Amon sighed. “I hope you have thought of a plan. I want this to end as soon as possible.”

Shachi looked down at his injured body. “It may sound idiotic, but why not use a surprise attack on them?”

”Surprise attack?” Ken questioned, not liking where the idea was going.

”They ambushed us when we least expected it,” Shachi explained, gesturing with his hands. “We could turn it to them and take them by surprise, too.”

Amon frowned. “Have your injuries caused your mind to go blank? Are you an idiot? He could easily identify any of us if we go in by surprise.”

Shachi smiled bitterly and sighed. “Not all of us.”

He looked towards Ken.

And he instantly knew what Shachi was planning.

”No.” He said immediately. “I refuse.”

”You know it must be done,” Shachi insisted. “You’re the only one whose face has never been revealed to him. If you managed to sneak in, you’ll be able to end his life and end this all.”

”I refuse,” Ken growled. “None except my most trusted people have seen my face. I refuse to comply with this.”

He noticed that the other three kings have glanced over his shoulder with a pleading look. When he turned around, he realised they were looking at Touka.

”No, Touka,” He said, voice growing softer. “You know why I keep my mask on, and you know why I refuse to take it off.”

”Touka,” Amon pleaded. “This is the only way we can get close enough to Matsuri to end this once and for all. We ask you to persuade him to—.”

”I SAID I REFUSE!” Ken bellowed, surprising everyone at his sudden outburst.

He was breathing hard through his nostrils now, furious that Shachi would even suggest such a way. He had his reasons for keeping the mask on, and he had his reasons for never wanting to tear it off in public.

”I want another plan,” He snarled. “One that doesn’t involve my face being revealed, and one that doesn’t force you to plead my woman to persuade me.”

Touka remained silent, even when Amon had approached her with a quiet and deadly walk.

”It is the only way, woman,” Amon said to her. “He is the only one among us that can effectively enter Kingdom Washuu.”

She knew that. She also knew that his own privacy had to be respected, but it needed to be breached just this once to end everything.

”I’ll talk to him,” She said.

* * *

It took her a full ten minutes to locate where Ken was. She didn’t even know that there were separate rooms aside from the large one where all the injured were located.

She found him in an empty room, alone and in the darkness. He was sitting down on the floor with his back towards her.

He was acting like a child.

”I know I’m being a child,” He said quietly. “But...”

Ken let out a heavy sigh. 

“I just... I just don’t want to do it—show my face, I mean.” 

Touka understood. To him, revealing his face to anyone would feel like being stripped naked in front of that person. He was too embarrassed about his scars that he had hidden his face from all.

”Maybe it’s time,” Touka said quietly. “Fifteen years you’ve kept that mask on. Maybe, fate decided that now would be the time that you take it off.”

He clutched at his mask. “And if I ignore fate?”

”Then, that’s just that,” She murmured, taking a seat next to him on the ground.

She gave a sigh. Her next few words were just going to be manipulating him.

”Didn’t you want her to be raised on the surface?” She murmured, looking at the baby in her arms.

Ken looked at her, his visible eye wide and shocked. Even with his mask on, she could see the emotion behind his mask.

”I-I do...” He stammered. “But—.”

”You’re insecure.” She finished for him.

”...yes...”

Touka pursed her lips. His privacy was one that had to be respected, but she knew that it was in this situation that he had to take it off. For the sake of all of them.

”What are you insecure of?” She began.

He didn’t have an answer.

Gently, she settled the baby into his arms. 

“When you’ve found out what makes you so insecure, you can tell me.” She said quietly, leaving him in the room with Ichika, the door ajar.

* * *

It took him a long time to emerge from the room, so long that it surprised Touka that Ichika hadn’t grown fussy from hunger or being in the same position for so long.

He had came out with a sigh, and had not spoken to anybody. Not even to Touka.

Slowly, he had untied the mask that covered his face, reaching for it and pulling it off of his face, revealing his other eye and burn scars.

”I’ll do it,” He whispered. 

No one in the room spoke a word, too stunned by the fact that they were staring at the face of a king which had been masked for so many years.

Amon was the first to elicit movement, which came in the form of words.

”T-That’s fantastic...” He murmured. “I thought you wouldn’t agree to it! Juuzou, get the armour!”

Amon’s men had gathered random bits and pieces of armour from the surface before they had descended into the underground. Any piece of armour that had not been dented or pierced through was taken, and it just so happened that they took enough from the corpses of the dead Washuu men to almost complete the full set.

The only things that was missing were the arm braces and the boots, but they should, hopefully, get by without being noticed.

”Would it not be strange?” Ken had asked as he donned the armour. “That I, a ‘Washuu soldier’, came back from the battlefield without a scratch?”

”We’ll just cut you up a little here and there,” Amon said.

”And what about a second person?” Touka had chimed in. “In the event that something happened, the other man could aid him in combat.”

Amon frowned. “Like a hostage?”

She nodded.

“Why not Juuzou?” Ken said, placing the helmet on his head while Shachi cut him at his cheek and elbow. “I understand he is your most capable fighter.”

”That is true,” Amon replied, smearing some of Ken’s blood onto the armour to make everything more believable. “Perhaps he will be your pretend hostage? Juuzou?”

The man in question nodded his head.

”Perhaps a dent to the armour?” Ken suggested. 

This made Amon grimace. “I should have taken the dented armour, then.”

”Fine, leave it then.”

”We could do a stab to his leg,” Yoshimura said. “I know where to stab to ensure that he does not bleed out, but still resembles a war wound.”

Ken nodded. “Go ahead.”

He winced as the sword was stabbed at the side of his right thigh, where the armour would not cover very well.

Almost immediately, his right leg dropped to the floor and he bit his lip to endure the pain. 

He cursed, slowly trying to regain his balance by firmly planting his right foot against this ground and lifting himself up. The sharp pain and warm blood oozing down his leg made him feel lightheaded.

”Another,” He insisted. 

Shachi shook his head. “I think it it would be better to not wound you further. We can’t have you collapsing from blood loss in the middle of trying to assassinate Matsuri.”

”Fine,” Ken muttered. “Juuzou?”

”Yes, sir.” Juuzou said, stepping forward as he drew his sword and impaled it into his stomach.

Ken grimaced. It was common knowledge for him that Juuzou no longer felt any pain from a grievous torture he had endured as a child, but he couldn’t help but imagine the pain that would’ve attacked him if he had been impaled like so.

”I won’t bleed out,” Juuzou said with a smile, not showing any sign that he had been affected by the stab wound. “I can’t.”

”Thank you,” Ken murmured sincerely, patting the young man on the shoulder.

”We will try to enter the castle on our own,” Amon said, opening the door and letting Ken out. “We will be behind you. Stay alive until we get past his defences.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I recently got a part time job, so I’m not sure if this will affect the updating time. It probably won’t? But I’m not sure


	34. Closing Your Eyes

They were traveling by horse, and it was suffice to say that it wasn’t a very pleasant ride.

Ken’s leg was in great pain and it only worsened with the up and down movement from his horse. He didn’t really know how Juuzou felt, considering he felt no pain.

”When we are near, you’ll have to play possum,” Ken said. “And I’ll have to drag you by your hair.”

Juuzou nodded his head, his face blank as he failed to register the pain that erupted through his body and the blood that was oozing out from the wound.

It was a few hours of galloping on their horses before they were close to Kingdom Washuu.

”Get off,” He ordered. “Try to act unconscious if you can.”

As ordered, Juuzou had climbed Ken’s horse and fallen limp, allowing his legs and arms to hang freely off the sides of the horse.

”Sorry. I’ll have to drag you by the hair soon,” Ken apologised.

Juuzou replied with a simple nod to the head. It was scary how well the man could pretend. Ken felt as if he was actually hauling a dead body.

Time passed quickly, and he found himself at the gates of Kingdom Washuu. 

“Halt!” 

He looked above. Hundreds of soldiers were above the walls of the kingdom, pointing their bow and arrows at him like he was an intruder.

”Speak! Who are you, and what are you here for!?”

His mind had almost went blank. He had been so preoccupied with planning on how to execute Matsuri that he hadn’t thought that something like this would have occurred.

”My name is Haise Sasaki!” He blurted, his voice grew weak as the sharp pain returned. “I return from the battlefield that took place at Kingdom CCG with their commander!”

With his sensitive ears, he could hear the mumbles amongst the archers.

”Kingdom CCG’s commander?”

”Impossible. Commander Juuzou has never been defeated in combat before. He is an outstanding warrior that has never fallen in battle before.”

”Feast your eyes on this!” Ken yelled, hopping off his horse, and pulling Juuzou to the ground, then lifting up his head via his hair for all of them to see Juuzou’s face.

Shock replaced the doubt on their faces. Their murmurs of scepticism had quickly turned to that of awe.

”It really is him!”

”That’s Commander Juuzou! He’s really been beaten in battle!”

The castle gates opened, and Ken was free to drag Juuzou onto his horse and march inside.

As soon as he had entered, more soldiers had crowded around him, furiously checking to see Juuzou’s face from themselves.

”Sod off!” He yelled, cringing at his choice of words. “I’m bringing this one to King Matsuri.”

Almost immediately, the men had backed up, as if fearing the name of the horrid king himself. Ken felt as if he had spoken of something that should have never been spoken of.

With his heart thrumming wildly in his chest, and a resolve to end this once and for all, he set off towards the castle, ignoring the stares along the way, and the whispers he could hear clearly.

As warned, Ken was now dragging Juuzou by the hair after he was no longer permitted to travel by horse. 

“State your business.” The guards at the castle gate said gruffly.

He changed the pitch of his voice. “I, Haise Sasaki, am bringing the commander from Kingdom CCG to our king. I wish for him to personally behead this one.” He said as confidently as he could without sounding like he was trying to mask a lie.

The guards raised their eyebrows at each other, then looked back at him, then to the pretending Juuzou.

”King Matsuri will be proud,” one said.

So far, everything had been going according to plan. No one suspected that ‘Haise Sasaki’ was actually the Nameless King himself.

And so, he had went into the castle like nobody’s business, dragging Juuzou along and hoping that he wasn’t causing the man too much pain or discomfort.

Matsuri was sitting in his throne room, his posture askew and seemingly bored.

”My King,” Ken said, kneeling on one leg and bowing his head while inwardly cringing at the fact that he was bowing down to his enemy and the one who burnt his kingdom. “I bring you the commander of Kingdom CCG’s army. I wish for you to personally behead him.”

“To what do I owe this? You could have finished him off yourself, no?” Matsuri’s voice said quietly, giving Ken the same discomfort as if someone were to roughly drag a sword across a shield.

Ken maintained his composure and soldier facade. “I know this man here,” He stood up to kick Juuzou in the face. “had caused great trouble for my king, and had caused mass destruction upon our men. I feel that I am unworthy of ending such a life, and that such should lie with you.”

Silence, and Ken was worried that Matsuri had saw through him.

”Raise your head, soldier.”

He did just that, and felt his heart thunder against his chest when he found Matsuri stalking towards him, his eyes watching him like a hawk.

The King bent down, observing the ‘unconscious’ man. His eyes flickered back to Ken, studying him.

”You have done me a great service, soldier,” Matsuri said, almost sounding sincere. “Might I enquire on how you have accomplished such a feat?”

Ken started panicking, but he made sure his eyes shone as he hurriedly thought of an answer.

”It was simple. I disguised myself as one of them and targeted this man. I fled once I had done so.” He said as sincerely as he could without making it sound like a complete lie. The lie could served as a reason as to why some parts of his armor were not from the Washuu.

Part of him expected Matsuri to nod and take Juuzou for himself. Another part expected him to enquire further on what had happened.

To his great shock, Matsuri had leaned in closely to his ear and whispered.

”Nameless King.”

Ken’s eyes widened and his heart felt as if it had destroyed his rib cage. It had been too easy for Matsuri, after all.

”Juuzou, up!” Ken barked.

Juuzou had sprung up on command. He reached into his tunic, where he had concealed a small knife, and jabbed it towards Matsuri.

Ken knew Juuzou was a strong and formidable opponent in combat; his extreme speed made him difficult to counter and made it extremely easy for him to strike anywhere.

However, Juuzou’s power was severely lacking without his battle axe. Daggers and knives worked fine with him if he could throw them, but they were only one-time use weapons unless he had the time to pick them up.

And in this case, he didn’t.

Matsuri was just as fast as Juuzou was, and far more deadly with his sword, which was almost always sharp enough to dent—sometimes even pierce through—metal.

The guards were starting to pour in, each brandishing their own weapons such as swords, maces, axes or bows, each sharpened so well that they would likely cut through skin on contact.

They were outnumbered against them, and their plan had backfired on them. But they couldn’t escape now, and their only option remaining was to at least fight their way through. End everything, even if it meant losing their lives.

Ken was quick to think. The size of the room didn’t allow for much movement, even for the soldiers. They wouldn’t be able to swing properly without hitting one of their own due to the sheer number of soldiers that had marched in.

Their attacks would be somewhat weakened, and he would use that to his advantage.

He dodged a sword flying towards his face, then slammed his foot against whoever threw that damned that at him.

Knowing that he, in his current form, would be unable to stand against the hoard of soldiers properly, he shifted. And this time, he had made sure that he had some blood on his tongue.

His spiral into darkness was different this time. Instead of floating around in pith black like he would always be, he found himself watching his own actions, unable to control himself.

It was akin to looking through someone’s eyes. 

He had always known that the injuries caused by him going berserk would be fatal, and could even lead to death, but he didn’t know that he was _this_ out of control.

Almost all parts of his vision were clouded with red. He could only hear screams and pleads for mercy, with some being cut short, ending with a horrified scream, or being replaced by the sounds of bone cracking.

At some points when his vision was clearer, he could see the eyes of someone being popped out from the pressure of his paw being pressed onto their heads. He could see whole bodies being hacked in half by using his claws. He could even see the light fade in the eyes of whoever he was attacking.

After some time, he could see that his movements had slowed somewhat, and the number of soldiers decreasing.

And then, Matsuri was in his vision, stained red with a horrified expression on his face as Ken lunged for him. 

His body slumped to the floor mid air, and he was rapidly being pulled back into his body. When he was aware that he could control his body, he realised the damage that had been done to him through the unbearable pain that he felt.

Swords, arrows, daggers and more had been embedded into his body. He had so many wounds that he couldn’t even count them, but he could see the large amount of blood that was being drained from his body. 

He wanted so scream at the sight. His body so battered and bloody to the point he couldn’t even recognised it was his own.

He had lost too much blood. He could feel his body grow cold and numb. However, he could still feel pain, but he could not scream, as his body disobeyed his commands to do so.

Even with the heavy amount of blood that was coating his entire mouth, his body had spent his energy reserves, and he couldn’t even find the strength to lift a paw up. The final lunge towards Matsuri must’ve been a last ditch effort done by his body to wipe the very existence that caused him rage off the face of the world.

And he had failed. Miserably.

It didn’t matter how many he had slain with his claws and fangs. If he had failed to take down the leader, it would have meant nothing.

Matsuri had recovered from his shock and fear, now tapping his sword against Ken’s snout.

”Look at you,” he said. “You’ve slain my men. You’ve slain Kichimura. But what about me? You’ve failed to kill me, and now you’ll die, knowing that I’ll still be alive.”

His voice was now closer to his ear.

”You’ve even killed your one comrade.”

Eyes wide, Ken weakly turned his head, only barely able to do so.

“Do you see him?” Matsuri taunted. “He’s right there.” 

Even though his vision was starting to blur, he could still see Juuzou’s body lying on top of countless others, his face pale and his eye closed.

Unlike him, Juuzou had little wounds. The most visible ones he had were multiple holes in his torso. The damage wasn’t so bad to the point he could see through Juuzou’s body, but it was still a horrible injury to look upon.

He recognised the size of the wound to be the same as the diameter of his fangs.

”I win.” Matsuri whispered gleefully.

The words angered him, but his body was exhausted and battered. He could no longer control his body, couldn’t tell it do get up and end everything.

He couldn’t even fight his heavy eyelids, which were so close to closing that his vision was just a blurry, thin line.

”Just give up. You’ve lost.”

Perhaps, if he closed his eyes, he would be spared the searing pain that shot through his entire body and the regret he had that he never had Touka as his queen, or saw Ichika grow up.

He would be spared the pain he would see in her eyes when she saw him in such a state. He would be spared her tears and her pleas to stay alive. 

Most of all, he would be released from all the painful memories he had in his life.

Yes. It would just be easier if he just closed his eyes, and allowed Death to take him into the abyss.

His vision faded, all turned black, and the pain he felt had faded, too.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know, it took me a little over a month to finish the original FYS, and it’s taking me 5, almost 6 months to finish the remade version.


	35. Finale

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Very sorry for the late chapter. This is the final chapter and I was really reluctant to finish it. This combined with me getting sick recently have made me just “bleughhhh” when I looked at the last chapter :/

Darkness, once again.

Ken was swimming in darkness. He couldn’t see anything, couldn’t hear anything, couldn’t smell or taste.

But, he could feel something heavy.

A force was pressing on all sides of his body, and made him feel rather uncomfortable.

He remembered closing his eyes, and his best guess at this point in time was that he was on his way to the afterlife.

Thinking of all the lives he had taken in his life so far, it was fair to say that he would be on his way to Hell. He didn’t deserve Heaven, after all the sings he had committed in his life.

Perhaps, after his punishment, he would be reborn as someone, or something else.

Maybe a rat, to remind him of the filth he had rubbed himself with in his previous life. Or as a peasant, to rid him of the luxury of his previous life.

Perhaps, he would be reborn as a rabbit. A cruel and horrible reminder of his lover and their daughter. And how he had failed as a king, unable to protect his citizens from the wrath of Matsuri.

How he had failed as a father and lover, unable to be there for his family when they would inevitably be slaughtered by Matsuri.

What was the point in regretting anymore? He was already on his way to Hell, and be given the punishment he deserved. Though, it would never be enough to atone him for the sins in his life.

He need only close his eyes and allow himself to suffer.

* * *

When the pressure surrounding him had eased, and he saw light through his eyelids, he slowly blinked his eyes open.

His vision was still foggy, and his head throbbed badly. 

In his vision, he could see light. Part of him wondered if he was about to enter Hell. Then, he quickly realised that this was not the case, as his back was pressed against something soft.

There was nothing soft in Hell, from what he had heard.

As his sense of sight came back to him and the throbbing in his head eased somewhat, he realised that he was lying on a bed.

Not just any bed, it was the bed he would sleep in when he was present in Kingdom CCG for the annual Kings’ Meeting.

The moment he tried to move his arm to sit up, a sharp pain shot through it, which caused his arm to slack to reduce the pain.

Any part of his body that he tried to move would result in near unbearable pain. As such, he had no choice but to sit still and wait for someone, anyone, to visit him and tell him exactly what had happened.

For the time being, he chose to recount what he could remember.

He remembered attempting to force his way towards Matsuri after slaying all of his forces, then failing horribly when his body broke down from fatigue, blood loss, and injuries.

Then...

His thoughts grew fuzzy after that. All he could remember was closing his eyes, and now he was lying on top of a bed, in extreme pain and feeling incredibly weak.

He still felt exhausted, though he had no idea how long he had been sleeping for, prior to him waking up.

Before he could even close his eyes, the door had opened.

He heard footsteps approaching him, then a shadow looming over his body. Even though there was a candle lit in the room, he couldn’t really tell who was in front of him.

”Who...?” He croaked.

Ken received no response, as the person ran out of the room screaming why he could vaguely hear as: “He’s up!”

His vision and hearing were still slightly off from usual, but he could tell that many other people had just entered the room.

He knew Amon was hovering over him, his sense of smell told him so.

”...what happened...?” He wheezed.

”Matsuri is dead.” Amon replied instantly.

The first emotion he felt pass through him was relief. The last of the Washuu blood and it’s leader had been eliminated. The second emotion was confusion.

There would have been nobody nearby to finish off Matsuri. Even if there had been someone, they would have been loyal to their king. 

“How?” Ken asked.

He could hear a faint chuckle in Amon’s voice. “Juuzou is excellent at playing dead, if you didn’t know that.”

Something clicked in his head. Juuzou must have laid low with his injuries and bided his time for an opportunity to strike.

”I-Is he...?”

”He’s fine. And look at yourself before you think about others.”

He didn’t need to. Memories of his tattered and broken body were still fresh in his mind.

Ken remained silent for a moment, letting everything sink in; Matsuri was dead, and Juuzou was still alive.

”...and after that?” He asked weakly.

Amon didn’t respond. The only thing Ken heard was the sound of retreating footsteps and a voice telling someone to: “Get out of the room and let her speak.”

He could no longer sense anyone else in the room. But he knew that someone was still in the room, and he was certain he knew who it was.

”Touka...?”

No response. She must be angry with him.

”I can’t see you... come here.” He tried again.

He heard footsteps approaching him, then stopping somewhere beside him. He could see a head just at the bottom of his field of vision.

“...are you angry?” He asked. “A-About the fact that I—uh—almost died?”

She was silent for an extended period of time, so silent that he thought she had left the room, but he knew she didn’t because he didn’t hear anything.

He almost jumped when she spoke.

”...I...I was the first to find y-you.” She said, and he heard her taking a deep breath. “It was h-horrible...”

”What did you see?”

”Juuzou—he, he was desperate. I saw him trying to sew up your wounds while you were lying in a blood of y-your own blood.”

It was understandable that she was so distraught. He could imagine himself being in the same scenario had she been the one lying in her own blood.

“I’m alright,” he murmured, trying to comfort her. “I’m alive, aren’t I?”

His response from her was a sniffle.

* * *

For Ken, his time bedridden was hell.

He had been lying in the same position, in the same spot, doing absolutely nothing except for trying to endure the pain that caused his mind to blank.

And after a month, when his injuries had partially healed, he was allowed to walk only in the confinements of the horrid room he had grown to hate.

For a few hours per day, though, he would find relief. Touka, or one of the kings, would enter to chat with him to keep him from descending into the depths of absolute boredom.

Today, he was attempting to play around with Ichika, who had just learned to roll about.

”Ichika,” he tried calling. “Look at Papa.”

She rolled over and looked up for a moment before looking away.

For a brief moment, he thought about how he would raise her in his castle alongside Touka, then his thoughts grew sad when he remembered his kingdom had burnt down. His thoughts grew panicked when he thought of his higher ups.

What a stupid king he was. For a whole month, he had forgotten about his higher ups. They had risked—maybe sacrificed—their lives to save the citizens in the burning fires, and he had just forgotten about them.

He wasn’t supposed to get out of bed yet, but he had to know.

It was dangerous for him to carry Ichika with him. His muscles were weak from the month he had spent bedridden, and he still felt the pain from his wounds. But, how could his pain be measured to the ones who had burnt their flesh to save the citizens, or even die in the process?

Ichika was heavy in his arms as he lifted her up. He was growing tired from just holding her, how was he going to make it far enough to find someone to ask? 

When he looked back on the bed, he saw that the mattress had actually dented from his constant weight for the last month. He really had remained bedridden for too long.

He struggled to stand properly on his own two feet when he stood up. It wasn’t difficult to stand, however he just felt as if he were walking on two bamboo poles.

When he observed his whole body, he could see how the muscles he had trained hard to earn had faded into nothing. But that didn’t matter now.

His steps towards the door were slow and sluggish. He felt slightly numb as he pushed the door open and poked his head out of the door.

Surprisingly, the first person he had come into contact with was Hide.

”H-Hide...?” 

Said man raised his eyebrows and gave him a smile. Though, Ken could only see the crinkle in his eyes, as his mouth was covered with a scarf.

”My King!” Hide said, voice muffled. “You aren’t supposed to be out of bed yet!”

”N-No...” Ken muttered. “The others... what happened to the others...!? My citizens...?”

He could see the light fade in Hide’s eyes. Something bad had happened, and Hide wasn’t spared of that.

An instinct of his roared at him to tear off that damned scarf that Hide was donning. And he listened to it, despite Hide’s protests, he reached for the scarf and tore it off of his face.

The damage was worse than what he could ever imagine.

The lower part of Hide’s face had been burnt horribly, even some parts of his lips were gone, revealing his teeth. He had wounds on his neck and cheeks that were red and fleshy.

His face must have been a look of utter distraught and agony, as Hide had hurriedly covered his face and even shielded his eyes from his face.

”P-Please, King. This is not something you should worry about! You have your own health to be concerned of—“

Unexplainable rage, agony and a hunger to know had overwhelmed Ken. 

“Bring all of them. Now.” Ken growled in a voice that he couldn’t even recognise as his own.

Needless to say, Hide had ran off to retrieve the other higher ups, and within a few short moments, almost all of them were present in his room.

He was somewhat relieved to find that the rest of them had suffered smaller injuries, such as a small burn here and there, or a fractured arm or finger.

But his most concerned thought was why Irimi and Kona were not present.

A gnawing feeling at the back of his head was whispering the worst case scenario to him, and he was beginning to sink into the depths of his mind when he popped the question.

”Where are Irimi and Koma...?”

The looks on their faces were more than enough to tell him that their fates had been met with woe.

It felt like an icy cold hand had squeezed his heart. Dread was stabbing his back a million times, and an overwhelming feeling of sadness had washed over his entire being.

He didn’t ask what had happened, but his higher ups knew.

”Koma was the first,” Nishiki said bitterly. “He was trying to protect Irimi and ended up having his spine broken... he was thrown into the fire.”

What a horrible way to leave the world. To be burnt alive while unable to move your own two legs and knowing that you’ve failed to save a comrade.

“And Irimi?” He choked.

No one said a word. Naturally, he assumed that she had gone in the worst way possible.

”...leave me.”

They left without a word. 

The sheer guilt Ken felt in the pits of his stomach and heart were indescribable. They had done their best to save the citizens, some had given their lives for it, and he had disgraced them by forgetting about them.

How could they still call him king when he had done something like this?

How was he still fit to be king if he had forgotten the people that had served him for almost all of his life? 

It was only during times like these that he would think of his father, the excellent king before him.

 _They are pawns, Ken_. He remembered Kishou saying. _They have been brought up to willingly sacrifice their lives for you. Dying for your command should be a great honor for them._

How could that be? Death was never an honor, even if it was for someone of royalty.

The thoughts swirled deeply in his head, and he was soon immersed in his own thoughts.

Hide would’ve told him to not worry and move on, there was no point in regretting anything now. They were already dead. His father and Touka would have likely said the same thing to him.

But, they surely had regrets. He knew that they both had dreams that, in death, they could not fulfil. And he just couldn’t bear it when they had so much left to do, yet died when following his commands.

* * *

It took another month for his injuries to be healed completely, and he had used that time he spent in bed to think carefully of what he would do in the near future.

He had come to accept the fact that he could do nothing for the dead. Even if he could, they wouldn’t be there to appreciate it anyways. There would be no point, and he would just be wasting his time.

Though he couldn’t exactly accept the fact that his entire kingdom had been burnt to the ground, as what Hide had told him when he had gone to inspect the damage.

The kingdom that his father and other kings before him had worked to maintain was now nothing but a pile of ashes.

What a pitiful king he was, to allow everything to become like this.

Then again, what could he do? He couldn’t just wish for everything to revert back to the way it was with a wave of his hand. He needed to start over.

His thoughts were interrupted by a knock on his door.

”Come in.”

Surprisingly, it was Yoshimura who had entered.

”Sir?” Ken questioned.

”My boy,” he greeted. “I came to talk to you about something. It’s something the other kings and I have been discussing for a while, now.”

Ken raised an eyebrow. “Why didn’t you discuss this matter with me?”

”You were still recovering, and we did not want to disturb your rest with such a matter.”

Of course they didn’t. 

“Very well,” Ken said. “What were you discussing?”

The old man smiled kindly. “We were discussing for all four of us to rule over one kingdom. A combined effort to rule over our people.

He nearly choked. “Excuse me?”

Such a thing had never occured before. Multiple kings ruling over one kingdom? If the previous kings heard of this, no doubt they would rise from their skeletons and wage war against the living.

“Yes, boy.” Yoshimura said kindly. “It is beneficial to each and every single one of us.” 

“How?”

”Remember, your kingdom has been destroyed, as have ours. All of us except for Kingdom CCG have been either burnt to the ground or destroyed so severely we cannot rebuild it in time.”

”In time for what?”

”Kingdoms take time to construct, lad. With the work needed, who knows how long it’ll take to finish construction. Perhaps, by the time your kingdom has been rebuilt, I’ll be on the other side, and you will be my age, left with no time to spend with your family due to your duties.”

Ken paused. For a moment, he swore he saw the future; he, an old man, despairing as he tried to maintain order in his half-finished kingdom and having a horrible relationship with his family from his lack of time spent with them.

It was a rather well thought out decision. And, what more could he lose? 

“...very well.”

* * *

_Six years later._

* * *

As discussed, the four kings had chosen to rule over a single kingdom together.

Of course, nothing was perfect. There were too many citizens and too little housing in Kingdom CCG, which they chose to expand on to accommodate for future generations. Occasionally, there would be quarrels between the kings, each trying to accomplish their own goals with the other attempting to bring them down to accomplish what they wish to happen.

But, there was peace. And that was all that really mattered at this point to Ken; a time where he and his family could live safely and where he could calmly live out the rest of his days.

Speaking of family, he had married Touka a few months after recovering from his wounds, officially making her his queen. Though, in the beginning she was a little hesitant, she came around it in the end. 

He could still remember their wedding ceromony. It had been grand and spectacular, and he had almost gotten dead drunk while celebrating.

His daughter had grown up to be a cheerful little girl, always energetic and looking for hugs from anyone she was familiar with. She was currently eagerly anticipating the arrival of her baby sibling.

”What will it be?” She chirped at her mother and father. “A baby brother or sister?”

Ken chuckled softly. “Ichika, we won’t know until Mama gives birth to them. Be patient.”

She pouted, but soon ran off to look for someone else, likely Hide.

And then, it was just the two of them. 

Touka let out a small sigh. “Are you happy?”

”Why would I not be?” He immediately replied.

She smiled at him. “Just wondering.”

Really, why wouldn’t he be happy? He was living a rather peaceful life with his family, he had a wonderful relationship with many other people, and he was happy.

It was all he could ever ask for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s finally the end. 35 chapters, almost 100k words, 140+ kudos’, over 4000 hits and me about to throw my hands. Words cannot describe my happiness when you enjoy my work. It’s been a fun 6 months writing Following Your Scent, and I do hope you’ll wait for my next work. 
> 
> Special thanks to Nonsensable, DreamerFae and kokichi for always commenting and giving me support for every single chapter I post.
> 
> By the way, I could be the biggest shithead in the universe by putting this at the very end, which was actually something I contemplated ever since chapter 1: 
> 
> He slowly opened his eyes. It had been a wonderful dream to distract him from the burning log of wood that was crushing his body. 
> 
> Such a young age, and he would enter the afterlife. 
> 
> Perhaps, he would continue his wonderful dream when he closed his eyes again...

**Author's Note:**

> Readers of DoH and Goodbye, I will be putting those two on hiatus. It isn’t because I am focusing on Following Your Scent, but because I am experiencing writers’ block for those two and I am reconstructing Following Your Scent through my memories. I hope this will do for my long absence from my fanfics.


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